Embarrassed, Ashamed, or mentally tempted, or what is going on with me but I am going through something that is tormenting me emotionally.

I have been banded for going on 2 years now I slowly have lost the weight maybe not as fast as some but I have have lost consistantly never have gained and was at a stand still for over 6 months after restriction.

But since the weight loss *sorry TMI* I have had my cycles restored and well along with that come the craving of FOOD something I never delt with before, I am blaming it on my cycles and hormones but could that really ring true. I did ask the day before thanksgiving (as a joke) if I could get an unfill to enjoy dinner with the family and the doctor said "sure" and I looked at him like what?!?!? Your giving me permission to get an unfill just to enjoy myself and he said yea and that I could come back for a fill in 2 weeks to get back on track and guess what I did!??!?!? I declined! I was proud of myself but ever since it's been in the back of my mind to just do this this ONE time and get that craving, torment, whatever this is out of my system but I am more scared of losing the restriction and trying to find it again and most of all gaining any and all weight back which is a given if I go back to having no restriction. Please just encourage me not bash me due to this bad mental behavior!!!!

That sounds like your head is playing tricks on you. Our body really doesn't care what food tastes like as long as it's the right fuel to keep it going and not weigh it down. But i also believe if you do not enjoy your weight loss you have regrets. Is there any way you make make your craving a lil more band and weight loss friendly and enjoy it without the guilty feeling. My doctor would never ever let me have an unfill to enjoy any kind of special ocassion. I think that sets you up for a downfall mentally and weigh wise. GOOD ON YOU for having the willpower to say no coz hell that would of been tempting. What is you main craving. Maybe you could have it just as you are finishing your meal so you are almost full and wont over do it. My craving is mash potato and gravy I tend to have the mash last and only need a lil bit coz im so full. Ohhh and I find a few calories in the day to have a couple of pieces of chocolate every now and then. don't beat yourself up we are human and we are allowed these lovely delights every now and then thats what makes it a balanced diet

good luck

Oh gosh, we've ALL thought of that! And wanted to do it!

But I cant believe a doctor would encourage you to play around with your band in that way! Its NOT as simple as unfilling and filling as the whim takes you, there's been so many posts with people having trouble getting back to good restriction, they start a fill/unfill cycle bouncing between under and overfilled, its just a slippery slope to trouble and any decent doctor would know that.

Unfilling to go overseas is one thing - especially if you risk problems in a foreign country, but for one meal? You're right to have declined.

As to the other issue, I definitely ahve a few days of appalling eating before my period arrives. To be honest, i dont fight it, I go with it. My habits are healthy 90% of the time and I believe that's what counts, what's more, my stable and health weight proves that that's what counts.

Actually any time I really get a craving I have a little of what I fancy. In any given day, 90% of what I eat will be healthy, but I dont cut out anything or deny myself totally and I believe that enables me to eat well overall.

So the days I *truly* want chocolate for Breakfast and a muffin for lunch, I do it. If its just a passing thought, I dont but I find my rabid interest in those foods dissipates like magic once my period starts.

How very interesting that your doctor would give you permission to do that. I was supposed to have a fill the week before Thanksgiving, but when the doctor and the nutritionist learned that I would be going out of town for the holiday, they opted NOT to do a fill. This was not because they wanted me to enjoy myself but because they wanted me to be close to the office if I had any issues with the fill (I'm very close to my sweet spot). I finally had that fill early this week, and I have struggled with the restriction. I'm glad the doc advised no fill before the holidays, because had I gotten into trouble out of town, I would have been pretty scared. However, I cannot imagine that he would have done an unfill simply for the purpose of "enjoying" a meal.

Having said that, I think you have gotten some really good advice already. Don't think of this journey as one of deprivation; if you do, you'll always have regrets about what you "can't" do rather than on what you can do. Rather than bemoan that you can't eat a plate full of stuffing, rejoice that you can eat a small piece of turkey while wearing that killer pair of jeans in a size that you never imagined you'd be wearing. For me, it's all about reframing my thoughts. At Christmas (my first Christmas since surgery), I thought I would be sad at all the foods I would not be able to enjoy. However, when I was buying a new outfit for a work party and was able to shop at stores like Talbots and Ann Taylor, the thought of what I might miss food-wise was instantly replaced with a new size 12 outfit. That non-scale victory was much more fulfilling than not eating some of the Christmas treats that I really didn't need anyway. (I did take small bites of a few just to satisfy my taste buds, and it was just as good as eating the whole thing.)

YOU CAN BEAT THIS ATTITUDE!

Embarrassed, Ashamed, or mentally tempted, or what is going on with me but I am going through something that is tormenting me emotionally.

I have been banded for going on 2 years now I slowly have lost the weight maybe not as fast as some but I have have lost consistantly never have gained and was at a stand still for over 6 months after restriction.

But since the weight loss *sorry TMI* I have had my cycles restored and well along with that come the craving of food something I never delt with before, I am blaming it on my cycles and hormones but could that really ring true. I did ask the day before thanksgiving (as a joke) if I could get an unfill to enjoy dinner with the family and the doctor said "sure" and I looked at him like what?!?!? Your giving me permission to get an unfill just to enjoy myself and he said yea and that I could come back for a fill in 2 weeks to get back on track and guess what I did!??!?!? I declined! I was proud of myself but ever since it's been in the back of my mind to just do this this ONE time and get that craving, torment, whatever this is out of my system but I am more scared of losing the restriction and trying to find it again and most of all gaining any and all weight back which is a given if I go back to having no restriction. Please just encourage me not bash me due to this bad mental behavior!!!!

First off I would have to say to you. Don't be upset if you give into cravings once and awhile. You are only human. This is a lifestyle change. This is not a give up your life thing. In our support group the motto is "Everything in moderation." You can still have the piece of cheesecake that you crave once and awhile. But you can't have the entire cake and you can't have a huge piece. If you don't give into your temptations once and awhile, you will ultimately crash and burn. That is how we all got here in the first place. DIETS DON'T WORK. Don't be afraid that you are going to gain the weight back. It's not going to happen with a little reward once and awhile. I eat sugar free ice pops. They are my lifesavers. But I did have a peice of cheesecake for Thanksgiving and another one for Christmas. I didn't gain. I lost weight.

As for your doctor telling you that he would unfill you. I've never heard of such a thing. Maybe it was a test to see if you would really do it?