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Ah Pam you got a picture up!! Yea!! Sorry about the cold. I hate being sick when it is this hot outside!! Jes your almost to goal I just noticed!! Yea!! You and Candra might end up with surgery on the same day!!

I know about the bread and now I also know about the crust. I simply just wanted to taste it and so I did. I know better. LOL!! I learned the hard way. Panera makes the best bread which I won't get to try again. Yea it is HOT, HOT, HOT. NO cooking here either salad and maybe making shaved ice with crystal light .....not sure how that will taste I have a shaved ice machine we get out on hot days but no more of the flavor syrups. I think crystal light fruit punch might work........ Riley they have a slushy machine at target. You pore in your drink and ice and it makes frappacinos or slushees . I was thinking about about your soy lattes in the morning. Not very expensive. I was eyeing it thinking you could put protien drinks, or soy milk and protien powder and have these great drinks.......than I thought slider and just came home instead. Stll thinking bout it though. would be fun but I would probably drink to many of them.

Candra funny about your husband wanting to walk with you. Jealousy was so evident it was funny!! Your gorgeous he has to watch you close!! So does he think that support groups will turn into rondevous?? LOL. Chris you eloped how romantic!! Nicole you getting enough water. Hmm ya watch that being thirsty it should be dying down with all the water you drink. SmallerJ I do know who you are. Wish we would have meet but next time. I hear the Richmond group is a good group. Tell me what you think? How is it different?

Well I am not being good today. I ate a small crust or bread at of all places a resterant!! My duaghter was begging to go eat at Panera I got a salad but just had to taste the crust on her bread...........I PB'ed all the way home. Darn it I know better. My daughter told me if I thought Robin was a nag just wait until she got started. She told me not to eat that crust and I told I would be fine!! Darn it, darn it, darn it............mad at myself. I agree with everyon sticking to 1/4 to 1/3 and as long as I don't go a bite over I feel great. I did get hungry But my protien is way up there now. Protien bar is not great tasting but has good stuff in it I need right now. I have been thinking three meals at 1/3 cup but I do need to figure the calories it might be to low. I am worried the 4 and 5 are a "SNACK" ..........da da da dum!! It is HOT. 107 last I heard. I am in the house again I said forget the errands it is to hot and well honestly I had to come home and change my clothes anyway. I am just dont for the day!!

Nicole what is August 8? I might want to go. But ladies I WILL FOR SURE be walking. My cardio is really not where it should be. If I run I will throw up at the end. None of this PB'ing I will seriously throw up!!! I HAVE to walk it!! I

Yea I totally agree I think what Christine has is a great marriage. I have noticed that already and everything she says about Brian is so positive. Which I notices make her upbeat and positive all the time.............when I am ready for a relationship I want something like that. Just need Christine to tell me where she went shopping for him cause I need to go there!! Ok exercised some. Had a protien bar this morning and those are so darn heavy and full of Fiber I am still full at 12pm. I age at 8am. Or maybe that is the band doing its job? I don't know yet. I know when I eat those I am not hungry for hours......they have 30 grams of protien and 180 calories but I bought them from some specialty store. Carbs are low too. Taste like eating a chalky brick but the full feels so great......... I have fruit for later today when I get hungry. Want to try strawberries. Hope that won't get stuck. No PB so far today!! I am staying at 1/3 or below cup and that seems to be the answer. I was estimating cup size before but now I am carefully measuring and I think that has helped the PB'ing to stop. So happy!! I think resterants are where I have the worst PBs and I figured out today it is because I have no way to measure how much I eat. I estimate so I am gonna try to not go to a resterant until my next fill unless it is with you guys!! :-P

down another pound and that tiime of the month again which is a suprize. I usually go up a couple pounds. Certainly not complaining. Going exercise today heading out now. I don't want to but I figure I have 26 days between now and the next fill and I need ever day of exercise I can get!! Nicole yea maybe counseling is a good idea. I am thinking about doing that again. God knows I have done enough of it in my life. Had to be in weekly therapy for two years in grad school as a requirement to graduate and LEARNED so much. Also had a year after my divorce. I can't say a negetive thing about therapy I loved it!! But I also like to philosophize and be constantly changing and growing............so it was right up my alley. I am wondering about anger managment after hearing her talk yesterday. I am finding I get angry easier now with the weight falling off. Not sure what that is about but I teach anger management classes but never took one. I am thinking I might see what Kaiser has to offer!! Totally different to just sit in a class and not teach it. But seriously think I might take an anger management class even if the person I get mad at most of the time is me!! LOL. Does that sound crazy??

Sorry for the long email. This whole marriage and relationship things got me thinking.............. Last november when I started my lap band journey I brokw up with someone. They didn't get it and my reason was the next 6 months to a year are all about me and getting my life and health back. It was a good decision for me I have needed all the me time to get through this.......... I want another relatsionship but not until I feel like I have gotten myself emotionally and physically back together. What they say is like attracts like. So you attract your emotional equal. That scares me because I don't want to be with someone who is my emotional equal right now!! I still have alot of work to do. Sometimes I think with bariatric surgery we are with someone who was our emotional equal when we were at our lowest emotional point and as we change our bodies and minds and grow emotionally our previous choices no longer work for us. Again we outgrow people. Eithet they grew with you or in your journey to emotional health you leave them behind. Sometimes other people don't want to change with us and we have to respect that and let go. We can only change ourselves and it is arrogant to think we can force someone to grow with us if they are not ready. So with marriage you are a part of a we but also a me. Hard balance sometimes. Relationship are dynamic not static. Both people have to constantly change and grow together for it work. I don't know. I hate divorce and I hate what it does to people. I think people should make it work if they can but sometimes it just is what it is. And I totally get why the divorce rate is so high. Same thing with alcoholics and drug addicts they get sober and more times than not they lose their marriages and relationships. The nature of the beast when one strives to become more emotionally and spiriturally healthy is we sometimes lose things and people who we think we can't live without. But life has a way of putting other people in our life who will grow and change with us to replace what we lost. Saying goodbye is sadly a huge part of emotional growth sometimes. Nothing easy about change as we all know......... If you tell someone what they are doing or saying is hurting you and they try to change or try to do something different keep those people around. Those people really care about you. But if they refuse to change or refuse to stop doing things that sabateage or hurt you than protect yourself and walk away. But the only way to know what kind of a person they are is to put yourself out there and tell them how you really feel. Don't assumethey already know................and in the end remember that "if someone shows you who they are..........believe them." Don't make excuses for them believe what they are telling you and saying to you and how they treat you. Ok, ok...........seriously enough thinking I have to sleep. Sorry for all my philosophying tonight. Food log tomorrow but I was a good girl!! No PB'ing and no over eating. Not to hungry so a good day!!!

Not married so I don't have the relationship issue. But for me I am out being social again and it has been years. Feels so good I Have my life back again!! I am very happyly single but I get the weight and marriage thing I have been there. I sorta think my husband helped me gain all the weight as a way to control me and prevent me from leaving him.........I did anyway I couldn't take the jealousy and being watched all the freakin time. I had my phone calls/emails everything screened. Took away what was special in our relationship. I always say I outgrew him. YOu know if one person in a relationship changes or "grows" the other person either grows with them or get left behind. The person getting left behind often desparately tries to pull the one growing back down to their level or "sabateoges" them. That is life. That is why so much divorce. And I totally get it with bariatric surgery. YOu can't help but change and grow. Poeple grow together or grow apart period. Friends or Spouses. FOr me I had to leave my marriage to grow and change. I had a choice to stay at his level with him forever and accept things were what they were or I go find my own path. Weight loss is a growing journey to be successfull we have to change and grow some poeple will get left behind.........sad but true. Sometimes if you really love someone you have to let them go to grow and be the person they were suppose to be. I don't know that answer but I have seen and been through alot in regards to relationships and marriage. I am jealous of anyone who has a great marriage and relationship. I totally get how unique and special that is. I just didn't have them or haven't had that yet!! Nicole I think our group is very, very close knit and we are getting closer and more bonded all the time. I think people can feel left out with all this going on. I wonder if Mike feels like he is getting left our of huge parts of your life and he is hurt?? I Don't know just a thought. I I know I am putting other friendship to the side to be with you girls. I missed half of my 20th reunion this morning to be with you all!! You guys get me nowdays and other people don't. But I know people in my life like my sister and aunt feel left out lately. My ex is a huge part of my weight issues........for way to many reasons to list. .......insecurity is what I can say about the way some of the men are acting lately with all you ladies. Mean who are jealous are scared to death of being left..................they just can't say the truth.............so they pull this crap. I know I have been there.........glad I am doing this alone this time. Not that I would oppose something once I feel like I have moy own life and act together. I want to have ALOT of me time before I get into another relationship!!! LOL. I like the me time and I lose that when I am in a relationship which might be my issue and less about the other person. I am a caretaker for sure and don't want anothe project right now!! Nicole your adorable and your so full of energy and fun. I LOVE hanging out with. And girl you really had me laughint when you called Dr. Baggs the King!! Mike sees that and sees how people are attracted to you and is blown away. Maybe he is just afraid of being left behind?? I think your a blast and you laugh and joke around with me which is to much fun!! Candra: I LOVE, LOVE, LOVED those pants. And here is a little secret. I went to the Lane Bryant outlet and found another pair on clearance for 10 bucks in size 16 I was too happy!!! I am jealous what bridge. I didn't exercise today. I went bowling tonight for my 20th high school reunion does that count? Can't believe I went but you know I just figured what the hell I am going and had a blast!! Six months ago I wouldn't have gone. I was still the heaviest one there but I overcame my fear of going and everyone was nice..........suprizing. Today was a blast!!! You girls this morning, my family all day than the high school reunion tonight. I am so lovling having energy and being social again.

Donna I will do my best to be there!! You will do great but I get being nervous

Candra girl you have the cutest clothes!! Love the way you dress!!

I will be there I as far as I know. Summer is always hard to tell but I plan to be there. Oh I missed meeting SmallerJ?? WHere was she?? oh darn smallerj next time ok? Sorry I couldn't do lunch I missed out I know. I had family around all afternoon and so weird but not feeling the restriction this afternoon. But than again I was really careful. Probably ate less than 1/2 cup.........well salad I ate alot but with no dressing on it at all.(less than a cup though) But the main stuff I barely ate and I was ok with it. I basically only tasted everything. No one bothered me about it.................I didn't have dessert cause it starts the cravings for me. I felt myself get full but not totally if that makes sense.......I stopped when I felt that 'certain" feeling but I didn't let it get to the last bite syndrome like yesterday ............you bandsters know what I mean. My only need to confess is that I ate alot of fruit. Water mellon and honeydew melon. Maybe 2 cups or more over about 2 hours............I don't know how that can be all bad. But slider for sure. I just couldn't feel any fullness with that it must be passing right throught.........but tasted so good and it so darn HOT today!! So loved seeing everyone. I think we were all there except for Chris, Reggie and Candy. Missed you guys. And yep the bandsters are taking over the group I noticed that today. Anyway it was so nice to see someone there that was at our group fill last week!!! Yea advertising does work Nicole!! And darn it I am really hungry right now!! I was a very good girl but I am also now a very hungry girl but at least I am home where I can find something that works.

Ah 40 down 64 to go...........I hope I don't have to fight as hard for the rest of the weight lose as I fought for the 40!! Knowing me I probably will!!

OMG when I change the ticker I will be officially at 40 instead of 39.................... Candra have to tell you girl I am a bit jealous that you can still eat popcorn!! I know that would get stuck for me. So enjoy it now.......just not to much.........enjoy a diet coke for me as well. AFter banding there are moments when I get a bit pissed off I can't have something I used to like .......like when everyone else is eating them and I standing there wishing. So enjoy it cause soon it will be over.........which is good and bad!! Like Christine told me enjoy the diet coke one last time cause after banding it is over..................and I did!! :-)

Hey Ladies not sure if I will make it today or not. I am trying. Still helping my mom finish up the cooking this morning. Donna if I don't make it I still have your book and I will make sure I get that to you. I am down another pound this morning. So something is working again I guess. I ended up getting hungry in the middle of the night and got up and ate rasberries. Which were good and stayed down fine. I know it is a snack but than I noticed it was 1am so that is a new day and Breakfast........not a snack!! Yahoo!! Riley girl you rock on the exercise!! I wish I did to. I used to when I first got married run 3 miles and day and was addicted to the runners high. But my marriage was crazy and I let myself get sucked into no exercise and gained weight with my husband. He was 6'2 and 350 big guy!! And he could eat like no ones business. McDonalds was always 3 hamburgers not just one for him. I really gained weight when I was with him. That is when I really packed the weight on since he hated my running obession!! Candra you are beautiful!! I told you that before!! :-) Italian beauty no matter what you weight. Nicole still thirsty and what it the thing going on tonight? Candy so glad you will be at the group fill on the 23rd. Riley I am doing liqiuds this morning and than see how it goes. My goal is no PB's at all today and I am gonna be careful what I eat. I think maybe I am not to tight but maybe just not following the portions sizes well enough.....cause some thing I can eat just fine and way to much. Other times a couple of bites does me in...... Christine you go girl. Love the positive attitude you have going on and OMG I was happy for you again when I saw your ticker today. So I am 214 this morning!! I finally get to change my ticker!!! :-)

ALso read Covert Baileys book The Ultimate Fit or Fat today...............really great book I love him. I have read all of his stuff. He is funny but gets his point across. He is a firm believer that diet without exercise will fail. Says that the more you build the muscles the more your metabolism goes up to fuel the muscle. So he recommends cardio and weight lifting..............he is a physiologist so he says there is some chemical reaction in the body to exercise that kicks up weight lose and fires up the metabolism. I gotta believe that is true.........great book ladies really good book. Waiting to get to the chapter "secrets to rev up weight loss" I will post if there is anything new......... So Chris that is why I bring up daily exercise log today!! LOL. I know I gotta rev it up more the next month and than see what happens.......but the scale is finally going down......... yea 450 is not great and I am sorta hungry but not willing to chance another PB tonight. I think I need to give it a rest today. I don't want the band to slip I am scared of that. I can drink Water so I am ok there. I plan to do better tomorrow. I am just worn out today. I lose better at about 1000. Drinking lost of water and crystal light but sorta just not wanting to touch food right now!! Ah I have a huge family event tomorrow with lots of food and i know I can't touch to much of it. Guess you can tell I am worried about how it will go............all my favorite stuff. Nicole crackers are out now!!! LOL. That is what made me PB twice today. I could eat them two days ago ..............well eat to many of them yesterday. Today I ate three and it was to much. Two days ago I MIGHT have eaten more than 5 (5 at 70 calories, 10 at 140 calories) it is possible I might have eaten several crackers over the course of a day.................no more, no more!!

I guess I will figure out if I have to much in the next few days. Today I was in tears cause I really thought I was making good food choices...........and than still get stuck. He was right on that he can't tight it up to much if I am still PB'ing on things. But here is something interesting. It is almost that time of the month and I don't know about everyone else but I seem to get tighter for a few days and have more problems that time of the month and that things get easier. Last time I got a fill it was the same timing. Next time............LOL..........should be about time again. I think the hormones and Water bloating might effect the tightness of the band............something I read on another posting.........what do you all think?? Happen to you? I will ask Dr. Baggs next time. I gotta up the exercise tomorrow. Chris great idea. I have a toning and weight lifting videos and the weights here at home...........not cardio but certain doable and good idea!! Anyone know about Joyce Vandral? SHe is into toning and weight lifting for women..........love her!!

Nicole I have thought about that and I think I have to stay at 1/4 no matter how hungry I think I am. I can't PB this much the band will slip. I worred about it to. WHich is why I try really hard to walk it off instead of giving in the instant relief of the PB................ I think I have to get strict on the 1/4 cup period. Hard knocks but I think that is some of what Liz and Robin where saying if it isn't work what am I doing doing wrong? Trying to eat to much or the wrong thing.......like LOL burrito!! Flour tortillas even one bite I know better!! Ok ladies here is the thing for me I don't exercise enough so maybe we should post what we did for exercise everyday...........I will be the first to admit except for mowing the lawn I didn't exercise today. I really HATE exercise and I really have to step it up this month!! After I am done I feel great but getting to the gym is such a pain...........I want a bike or treadmill at home but so expensive!!

Candy I hear you about the pain if you eat to much I get that to. Mine goes from the band all the way down to the port when I eat to much. Weid I know. I sometimes wonder if the full pushes some of the fluid back into the port area and that is what hurts. I love my band to. But was in tears today the third time I PB'd. I am really tired and frustrated today with life nothing to do with the band and than the band is really talking to me today!! Thanks Dr. Baggs for only putting in .5ccs. Blessing in disquise!! I just hope this last more than a few days. I also think if I ate certain things like salad the band might now work as well. But who knows Riley could barely eat her salad today. I haven't tried that yet. I am down 1 pound today so crossing my fingers the plateau is broken!! :-)

Hey ladies, I have restriction. Boy do I have restriction............. I tried dinner twice neither time worked but I am not hungry. I finally had a protien bar and I am keeping that down and am feeling full. MENU: B. Protien shake: Slimfast strawberry!! YUM 180 Calories L. Lentils 3/4 cup-140 calories or a bit less cause I didn't eat the whole cup D.Tried to eat the inside of a burrito-PB'd it up Db Tried to eat some crackers and cheese a couple of hours later and PB that up too. Dc. Ate a protien bar and that is staying down-180 calories and really full now. (not to tastes 30grams of protein so on the dry/bland side but FULL so yah!!) Water 64 ounces easy. Nicole I am so, so, so thirsty the last week since I switched back to water. I can't get enough. I hear ya. I drink all day long. Fasting yesterday for the weigh in didn't help me being thirsty. I drink 120 ounces a day so barely made that today and yesterday.

I want a pound by tomorrow too!! LOL. I noticed you were limping a bit yesterday Riley. Well weird but my band seems to be tightening up a bit. I am not getting food down very well. I am not full per see but I just can't eat alot either. I am hungry for more but I get stuck if I eat some more.........ok maybe that is bandster full. Riley could you go camping and not S*N%A@C&K?

Riley I think I have dinner a and b too.............I thought that was ok as long as the calories were low and you didn't eat bad things. Still trying to get ahold of the concept that dinner b is a snack. So I guess I have to eat a bit more at dinner a to last all night or take something to sleep!! LOL. I am not sure mine is head hunger I know about that.....oh boy do I know when I have that. This is really hungry I get about 8pm at night. I am drinking alot of water today. Some crystal light and I just mowed the front and back yard. I need the exercise so I did it myself today. But I really have a bad, bad headache today. My port bruise is quite a beaty and getting more colorful by the hour!! I don't like to see it cause it looks worse than it hurts!!

Donna Dr. Baggs and Liz were asking me alot of questions about the support group in Sacramento. They wanted the address, date time ect. They also wanted to know how many bansters we had showing up. I told them between 13-18 (trying to estimate in my head the people around the table that day) They seemed impressed with that. I told them I thought we had more like 20+ bandsters between the Kaiser group and online support group. I emailed them both this morning and gave them all the information. They seemed interested in the support group and how active we all are and I know they love all the SAcramento ladies and the way we stick together. My guess is they will give out the information to their Sacramento clients and maybe even at orientation. Just Liz said they can't "push" people to our group or arrange get togethers becuase of the HIPPAA laws. So the group might grow. I have been strongly encouraged to keep up with the support group at every fill............:-)

Yea Riley you got the picture up!! Not sure how but yea!!

I don't feel full at all with 1/4 cup. But maybe with the next fill I will go from 3/4 to 1/4......... I am having alot of people around for lunch tomorrow and my mom is cooking all day. I think I get to taste everything and not much else ..............LOL. Seriously don't want another PB'ing episode between now and when I go back for a fill. Dr. Baggs probably won't give me one if I don't get this figured out............. My dad told me if they tell you don't eat to much than just don't and you won't throw up again. He said it is easy I don't know why you don't get it. Arrghhh..............I told him I had to eat 1/4 cup of food and he was like not that can't be right you won't survive. He asked me how long are you gonna do this it isn't healthy!! So much for support huh??