kcmagu

Likeblanche - YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE! You are typical person about to go through something major (By that I mean both the surgery and the life changes that come with it) I remember being scared - I didn't 'cheat' pre-op but I remember wondering if it would really do any damage. I then realized I had done enough self-sabotaging my entire life why then at the brink of changing my life for the better would I do it again. I had made it through 2 weeks of the pre-op diet why not 1 more night. You will still be able to enjoy some of your favorite foods in weeks to come but will learn to do it in a healthier manner. Hang in there - you will make it (literally and figuratively) I take care of people in their 70-90's who have 6-10 hr long surgeries with every health problem known to man - you will wake up tomorrow after surgery a little groggy, a little sore and about to begin day 1 of reclaiming your health. Take Care!

Although I would be kidding myself if I said I wasn't excited about looking better as the weight comes off, my motivation has truly been to be healthier. I've never said I wanted to get to a specific weight or be a certain size. My goal weight (for ticker purposes -145 lbs) was picked simply because it was the 'high' for what the powers that be say my weight should be for my height. I often hear/read how people are excited about getting back into their 'skinny jeans', go back to a size they were pre-baby or in college, etc. This is a totally foreign concept for me. I have never been anything but obese in adulthood and my teenage years. I have no idea what my body should/will look like, how my face will change or what size I want to be, etc. Although I am 34 I have not been an 'appropriate or healthy weight' in probably over 22-24 years. Physically, I have always looked like my dad (or so people say) but he is also overweight (although not as much as I have been) whereas my mom and sister are size 2-4's Part of me is very excited by this but I also wonder then how will I know when to stop - I don't want to be 'greedy' but I also want to reach the full potential that this tool will allow. My mind is also troubled by this because considering the amount of weight I have and will lose, the length of time I have been obese and the obvious saggage I am experiencing - I fully expect to have plastic surgery. So I wonder when will it be appropriate for me? Not that this is my focus but I just can't keep from thinking about it. I guess only time will tell :thumbup:

Although I would be kidding myself if I said I wasn't excited about looking better as the weight comes off, my motivation has truly been to be healthier. I've never said I wanted to get to a specific weight or be a certain size. My goal weight (for ticker purposes -145 lbs) was picked simply because it was the 'high' for what the powers that be say my weight should be for my height. I often hear/read how people are excited about getting back into their 'skinny jeans', go back to a size they were pre-baby or in college, etc. This is a totally foreign concept for me. I have never been anything but obese in adulthood and my teenage years. I have no idea what my body should/will look like, how my face will change or what size I want to be, etc. Although I am 34 I have not been an 'appropriate or healthy weight' in probably over 22-24 years. Physically, I have always looked like my dad (or so people say) but he is also overweight (although not as much as I have been) whereas my mom and sister are size 2-4's Part of me is very excited by this but I also wonder then how will I know when to stop - I don't want to be 'greedy' but I also want to reach the full potential that this tool will allow. My mind is also troubled by this because considering the amount of weight I have and will lose, the length of time I have been obese and the obvious saggage I am experiencing - I fully expect to have plastic surgery. So I wonder when will it be appropriate for me? Not that this is my focus but I just can't keep from thinking about it. I guess only time will tell

YESTERDAY: B: 5.8 oz plain greek yogurt, 1/2 a papaya, 3 strawberries and 1/4 c. mango ginger granola S: 2 crackers with a brie-like cheese on them L: 2 oz trerriyaki steak, 1/3 c. black bean salsa w/ avocado and 1/2 papaya S: 1 bowl of microwave popcorn and 2 chocolate covered macademia nuts D: 3-4 oz grilled/glazed Opa, 1/5 avocado w/ blue cheese dressing, 1/3 a papaya, several bites baked purple sweet potato Dessert: 1 scoop ice cream, 1 scoop sorbet :ohmy: Today & Tomorrow are travel days as I leave my island paradise to return to the Midwest :thumbup: I have attached 2 pictures below for those of you interested in the fruit I was eating - the little brown balls are the lychee and the dragonfruits (cousins) and the red ones are the rambuttan - I wish we had taken the picture the day we had first bought everything so you could see it all - but you get the idea.

Luluc - it would greatly sadden me for you to be gone for too long! TODAY: B: 5.8 oz greek yogurt, 1/2 a papaya, couple sliced strawberries & 1/4 c. mango/ginger granola L: 3 oz teriyaki steak & chicken, 2 bites brown rice, 2 bites papaya black bean salsa, 2 chocolate covered macadamia nuts S: 2 small handfuls trail mix D: 3 oz grilled & glazed Opa, 1/2 a small baked purple sweet potato drizzled w/ coconut syrup :crying:, 1/3 c. black bean salsa and diced avocado S: 1 scoop Kauai pie ice cream Still eating too much - but felt a little better when I clocked my daily walk here today and realized its >5 miles a day + swimming in the ocean :laugh:

San Diego Mom - I am on Kauai - my absolute most favorite island. If you're at all familiar with the island - we are staying in Princeville. I can not tell you how much I am enjoying the food. Today I didn't snack - but our dinner and dessert made up for it - couldn't believe I could eat as much as I did (shouldn't have!!!!) TODAY: B: 5.8 oz plain greek yogurt w/ 2/3 a papaya, 1/4 c. mango ginger granola and 2 small slices portugese sausage (grilled with a little splenda on it) L: 3 oz teriyaki steak & chicken, 2 bites macaroni salad, 5 bites sugarloaf pineapple, 1 rambuttan, 1 chocolate chip cookie and 2 chocolate covered macadamia nuts D: appetizer - several bites of an artichoke/mushroom piccata with a garlic butter wine sauce (dipped 2 small rounds of bread in the sauce :smile:) THEN - about 2.5-3 oz sesame crusted Mahi Mahi, and couple bites sauted veggies. Dessert - 1/2 a serving of Jack Daniels sauteed apples over vanilla ice cream I feel sick just writing all of it down - forced myself too though - just as I will force myself to get on the scale the moment I get back - However, I have enjoyed every minute of it and know that I would have certainly eaten more pre-band!

TODAY: B: 5.8 oz greek yogurt w/ 1/2 a papaya & 1/4 c. mango/ginger granola S: 1 apple banana and couple handfuls oriental snack mix L: 1 slice deli turkey meat, 1 slice cheddar, 1/8 avocado, 1 tsp blue cheese dressing and 1/2 of a papaya S: couple dragonfruits, lychees and rambuttans, 2 pieces choclate D: 1 crab cake and couple bites grilled nairagi, and am now enjoying another piece of flan :thumbdown:

I consider myself truly blessed right now - sitting on a lanai watching the moon rise over the ocean, hearing the waves crash on the shore. I am in Hawaii - on my favorite island Kauai. I was last here 5 years ago. At that time I was probably about 30 lbs heavier than I am now - (this was of course before I packed on another 50+ lbs). It has me thinking about the next time I might get to come (hopefully only 1-2 years away) I have learned there are many levels of being obese and overweight for that matter. Maybe, just maybe this will be my last trip to Hawaii as being obese (of any kind) and maybe this trip or the next would be the last where I'm even overweight. Wouldn't that be something! This last summer (about 3.5 months after being banded) I went on a trip and laughed at the joy I found that I didn't need a seatbelt extender on the flight (something new to my world the last 2-3 years) Well this trip I was overjoyed that not only did I not need an extender - but my thighs did not just barely fit in the seat - there was plenty of room! It's these small joys, not realizing they're coming, that sometimes give me the biggest kicks!

I consider myself truly blessed right now - sitting on a lanai watching the moon rise over the ocean, hearing the waves crash on the shore. I am in Hawaii - on my favorite island Kauai. I was last here 5 years ago. At that time I was probably about 30 lbs heavier than I am now - (this was of course before I packed on another 50+ lbs). It has me thinking about the next time I might get to come (hopefully only 1-2 years away) I have learned there are many levels of being obese and overweight for that matter. Maybe, just maybe this will be my last trip to Hawaii as being obese (of any kind) and maybe this trip or the next would be the last where I'm even overweight. Wouldn't that be something! This last summer (about 3.5 months after being banded) I went on a trip and laughed at the joy I found that I didn't need a seatbelt extender on the flight (something new to my world the last 2-3 years) Well this trip I was overjoyed that not only did I not need an extender - but my thighs did not just barely fit in the seat - there was plenty of room! It's these small joys, not realizing they're coming, that sometimes give me the biggest kicks!

Life starts now - I do love the food in Hawaii! Mong chong is tied with salmon as my favorite fish to eat. I have only ever been able to find it in hawaii - although I'm sure expensive gourmet stores could get it - I consider it something to look forward to (with the produce) every couple years when I get to go. It used to be a rubbish / nuisance fish that would get caught on the long deep lines fisherman use to catch big tunas. They are a very deep fish with a tender but meaty texture but extremely mild flavor - best of all worlds! TODAY: B: 5.8 oz plain greek yogurt & 3/4 of a papaya S: couple dragonfruit and tasters at costco (always a weird stop in hawaii - but love to get necessities there) L: 2 slices deli turkey meat, 1 slice cheddar, 1/4 papaya, 1/3 cup black bean & papaya salsa w/ avocado S: 1 mini apple banana, 2 handfuls oriental snack mix D: 2.5 oz mong chong grilled & glazed, 1/3 papaya, 1 asparagus spear w/ a tsp of blue cheese dressing, 1/8 avocado And I already know we're having flan for dessert - seriously enjoying the vacation in all aspects - but looking forward to the fill when I get back!

Too many days missed while I was in transit - so will just start with yesterday: B: couple bites each of - pineapple coconut pancakes, avocado/bacon & cheese omelet and 1/4 of a fresh papaya L: 2 oz teriyaki steak, 2 bites rice and 3 wontons from a wonton soup S: 2 chocolate covered macadamia nuts, handful oriental snack mix D: leftover teriyaki steak and 1/2 papaya S: slice of lilikoi pie (too big) TODAY: B: 6 oz greek yogurt w/ 1/2 a papaya S: oriental snack mix, 1 mini apple banana L: 2 string cheese, couple rambuttan and dragonfruits S: beef jerky, cracker w/ soft cheese D: 3 oz mong chong, grilled & glazed w/ papaya black bean salsa and avacado S: another piece of lilikoi pie - good thing I'm walking Although I shouldn't be - I'm glad I didn't get a fill before this trip but thank goodness I get one shortly after I get back

B: nothing - too busy L: 2 meatballs, crackers and cheese dip S: 1 scoop chocolate ice cream w/ chocolate sauce - I know!!! D: 3 meatballs, 1 slice smoked provolone S: tart frozen yogurt and chocolate drizzle

Renee - I am so sorry I didn't mean to brag I am just so excited - I love Hawaii. I'll keep it to a minimum from here on out - other than I will be posting my intake from Hawaii

So didn't start being good today :tongue: - too much leftover from yesterday and I'm going out of town for 10 days so wanted to get it out of house - had neighbors over. LEAVING FOR HAWAII IN 37 HRS - WILL BE EATING LOTS OF FISH AND FRUIT! B: Cheese and crackers L: 2.5 oz braised beef, 5 reduced fat pringles S: 2 mexican truffles D: 2 sweet & sour meatballs, 2 empanadas w/ queso S: reduced cal tart frozen yogurt w/ chocolate drizzle

It was bad today - but I knew it was coming so I tried to keep it small in the am to try (unsuccessfully) to make up for the grazing during the super bowl. B: grande skinny vanilla latte L: 2 bites of filling for the stuffed mushrooms, 1 meatball then the grazing: stuffed mushrooms, artichoke dip, guacamole, chili cheese dip, meatballs oh yeah - and the vanilla cake and Tequila Punch - now yes it was over 5 hours but seriously grazing is the word for it because I feel like a cow! I must exercise hard tomorrow and get back to eating healthy - especially since I leave for HAWAII in 3 days!!!!!!!!!! :w00t:

Today: Brunch: 2/3 small movie popcorn, 1 large handful reeses pieces :thumbup: S: small (5oz) low fat tart frozen yogurt w/ strawberries D: 3.5 oz braised beef, 1 bite potato S: baby ruth bar, some of the frozen yogurt horrible food day! - Unfortunately I know tomorrow wont be better :thumbup:

I have had my dog Sadie for about 4.5 years. She is 25 lb mutt (terrier/boxer/beagle) she is very sweet but acts tough, barks constantly at everything and historically has not been great on a leash. This week I have adopted another dog - Mia. Mia is the love of my sister's family - but they have had to separate due to a dog allergy developed by one of my nephews. Mia is a 40 lb shepherd/terrier mix. Dogs will be dogs and they are feeling each other out - taking turns exerting dominance but I will be pack leader. We have started walking 2-4 miles a day together (which they are doing very well) in order to: 1. Wear them out 2. teach them to view me as the leader 3. Let them have time together where they're not vying for my attention 4. Help me lose weight We all win - except the cats - they still hate us all!

I have had my dog Sadie for about 4.5 years. She is 25 lb mutt (terrier/boxer/beagle) she is very sweet but acts tough, barks constantly at everything and historically has not been great on a leash. This week I have adopted another dog - Mia. Mia is the love of my sister's family - but they have had to separate due to a dog allergy developed by one of my nephews. Mia is a 40 lb shepherd/terrier mix. Dogs will be dogs and they are feeling each other out - taking turns exerting dominance but I will be pack leader. We have started walking 2-4 miles a day together (which they are doing very well) in order to: 1. Wear them out 2. teach them to view me as the leader 3. Let them have time together where they're not vying for my attention 4. Help me lose weight We all win - except the cats - they still hate us all!

Today: B: nothing - wasn't hungry L: 1/2 c. chicken tortilla soup, with a sprinkle of shredded cheese S: grande skinny vanilla latte, 3 chocolate kisses D: 3 oz braised beef, 1/4 c. baked beans S: will probably have 2 mexican truffles

So I worked last night and had family fly into town today (including my new 4 legged friend to be joining my household - first time I've brought a new animal into the household of another animal (so far so good - but I have now been up for 33 hrs.) Today: B: grande skinny vanilla latte S: cheese & crackers L: 1/2 c. chicken tortilla soup, 2 bites bread, 3 chocolate kisses S: beef jerky D: 1 1/3 slice smoked turkey, 1 slice brisket (very thin) couple bites baked beans and 1 bite cheesy potatoes Later: blindly ate chocolate pieces :thumbup:

Happy Bday San Diego! Glad you enjoyed it. Tonight was a 24 hr+ night - Yesterday: B: cream of wheat, made with skim milk, w/ 1 tbls peanut butter S: cheese & crackers, hershey kisses L: 1/3 cheeseburger - w/ carmelized onions - no bun S: trail mix, cheetos :thumbup: D: 1/2 c. chicken tetrazini B #2: 1/2 c. kashi oatmeal

I also use benefiber. I put a coffee scoop (1/8 c.) in every shake i make and sometimes in other drinks or soft foods - 1-3 scoops a day.

still weird day - snacked on and off throughout day (need to concentrate tomorrow on specific meals (and healthier) couple bites everything throughout day and repeated: reduced fat pringles, vermont cheddar mac & cheese, chicken tetrazini, baked cod, hershey blisses, chips & queso also had a grande skinny vanilla latte

Yesterday: Did end up staying up for 30 hrs - and then only napped from 3:30-6:30, then went to bed around midnight (3 days in a row of 3 hrs of sleep or less- do not recommend!) Don't know how this affects my band - but I was very tight yesterday. So even though I was up from the previous day - I restarted my meals as below: B: grande skinny caramel latte S: tried 2 bites shredded pork burrito and 1 bite scone (making meals at dream dinners with a friend) - came back up L: multi grain chips and queso - all came back up S: cheetos and 2 hershey kisses (most came back up - knew it would be a bad choice but literally was so exhausted and they were within 2 feet (from guests in the house) D: malted lite chocolate muscle milk shake Rhondalou - I really struggle getting my veggies in - I rarely do and I am not happy about it - it's a goal of mine these next couple months to work on it (a spring resolution!)

Thursday: (was tight for some reason - lot of what went in didn't all stay) B: couple bites queso and multigrain chips S: malted mocha protein shake L: couple bites crustless quiche, chicken S: jerky, cheese D: malted mocha cheesecake protein shake Friday: I was tempted not to even write it down. B: couple bites cheeseburger w/ grilled onions - no bun S: that is all I did all night at work - carrots & dip, cheese & crackers, chocolate, cheetos :scared2:, etc D: will be lite chocolate muscle milk around 0600. I may not end up going to bed till tonight (might be up for 36 hours) and since I only got 3 hrs sleep yesterday - would not be surprised if I ate another meal or 2 by the end of it - will edit post.