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Molly1978

Pre Op

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Blog Entries posted by Molly1978

  1. This Is Hard

    · Molly1978 · 09/21/2012 15:21

    Ok, so I'm getting closer to the end of my second week and I'm still having trouble eating only 1/4 cup of cream of rice/pudding/yogurt @ night. It's getting ridiculous!
     
    I've always been used to eating kinda all night (sugar-free popsicles since I started the program) until I went to bed. So, My head hunger is REALLY going at night. My mom wanted to know if it was like I had lost a friend. I told her a firm no because that was the truth. It's just this horrible need to eat too many carbs and get this satisfaction in my head.
     
    My family is eating steak, mac and cheese, green beans, bread (BTW they are super skinny NOT fair) and I get a 1/4 cup of mush. I'm totally pouting at this point.
     
    I'm also having diarhea, like a lot. So, I feel like I could become dehydrated.
     
    And, now I sleep all the time. It sucks.
  2. At this moment, I am so happy. Happy to be loosing weight so fast! For the first time in my life! Ok, I know it wont be this easy always but, I'm gonna take this happy and run with it!
     
     
    If I loose 3 more lbs by Monday, I'll have lost 10lbs. this week! And I think I might actually loose a few more lbs. if I keep going the way I'm going. Its fun to get on the scale now. ha ha ha
     
     
    What I want now is one of those fit bit thingys and the new scale that goes with it (the aria I think its called?) I think that weight loss centers should offer them at a discount to their patients. For achieving goals or something, or just 10% off.
     
     
    I have a feeling that I wont get one for my birthday so, I'll have to buy it for myself. Boo hoo, where's that violin noise coming from?
     
     
    I pooped today for the first time in 6 days. It was almost the worst poop I've ever had. I was sweaty and had to lie down afterwards. Baby Jesus it was painful. Obviously I've been constipated.
     
     
    After my horrific 20 minutes on the pot, I layed down for 10 minutes, got up and drove for the first time in 5 days. It really wore me out. No driving after fighting with the poopy again for a while. Hopefully there will be no constipation like that again. I don't wanna be holding on to the sink and towel rack again praying for a miracle while sweat is dripping from my forehead. Blech.
     
     
    I briefly talked to my cousins wife on facebook today. I told her I had gastric bypass. She said, "Ohh noo!" and "So Sad!" I'm thinking to myself, sad? Seriously? Ummm, I'm huge and trying to loose weight is sad? What a psycho! That makes me so mad! But, I calmly said (typed) "Don't be sad, I'm not. I really like everything thats happened so far."
     
    Sad? Why would some people automatically say sad? Don't you understand lady that I've been miserable and basically SAD for a really really long time??? This is the opposite of sad idiot! Jealousy? She thinks I'm not going to get enough nutrients or something? That's by far the weirdest reaction Ive gotten so far.

  3. Pre-Surgery Freak Out

    · Molly1978 · 09/08/2012 12:43

    Strangely enough, I'm not as freaked right now as I was 10 minutes ago. Oh wait, here it comes......yep, self-doubt and that horrible feeling in my stomach is back. Ok breathe. In and out, in and out. This is what you've wanted for so long, remember? Just calm down! It's gonna be fine.
     
    Molly, you work at the hospital where you have surgery, you've explored all the ins and outs of the surgery, you know what to do and you'll do it. You're super educated about this whole process so, why the freak?
     
    Ah yes, that nagging feeling that they're gonna weigh you on the day of surgery and say, "you gained 5 lbs and now you can't have surgery." They probably COULD do that if they wanted to BUT, in my situation I don't think they would. And, I may have gained 5 lbs. I just haven't gotten on the scale in the last 2 weeks since I met my 5% weight loss requirement for surgery. Gulp.
     
    My friend who had the sleeve done said that they did weigh her right before surgery in the pre-op area and she had gained 3 lbs but, no one said anything about it. So.....that gives me hope.
     
    I mean seriously, what do they expect? I want to stuff my face at every waking moment now. It's terrible, way worse than trying to loose weight. I'm not gonna get to eat most of the junk I'm eating now....well, for a really long time! Ok, I guess that's the point.
     
    I had a LARGE piece of red velvet cake at work yesterday. It was so fabulous. I'm really never going to forget it. Or the horrific diarhea after I ate it that looked surprizingly red in the toilet. YUCK!!! TMI!!!
     
    I dreamt about Top Ramen last night. I woke up thinking, WTF? I never dream about food!!! Never!!! Am I gonna dream about food now? Oh brother, I sure hope not.
     
    I dreamt that I was parked next to another car with 2-3 people in it. When I got out of my car I noticed that they had a large bag of Top Ramen on the shelf that you can see via the back window. I asked them if I could have it. WTF!!!!! LOL In the end, I think it turned out to be cookies and something else instead of Top Ramen. So, I said, "Oh, nevermind, thanks anyways" and I had to leave the bag of whatever with them. Hopefully this is a good sign.
     
    Wow, this whole blogging thing is super therapeutic. I'm gonna have to do it more often.
    Off to work for my last day until October. That is IF they still let me have surgery. lol

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