DynamoMini

Congratulations! I'll love hearing how you are doing. I don't plan to get banded until April. Keep us informed and good luck.

Cascadian - I totally agree with your argument supporting the obesity conumdrum. It is frustrating to have "normals" complaining that WLS is the easy way out. I'm angry that I have to get banded, but I think it is the only chance I now have to get to a normal weight and stay there. Just like you, I was an Optifast All Star and went down to a normal weight. Within a year I had gained 60 pounds back, and within two years I had gained the other 20 and 40 more. Would this ever happen to a thin person. No way! My goal is the weight loss, but more than that, it is staying in the zone where I am healthy. Thanks for telling it like it is. I also believe in former lives, I survived without food for long periods of time, during times of famine. Good thoughts,

I know that off topic stuff does make for longer reading, but sometimes it is the process "stuff" that needs the work. So, I don't mind. I am so glad to hear that you have lost your excess weight and have maintained. What have been your challenges? What seems simple? Perhaps I need a little more of the sharing from your experience. I want to learn through your experience, too.

Hi, I think it is great to get hooked up with a program as extensive as the one you have described. I'm in Colorado, i don't think there will be that kind of support here, but I am using the internet for support. This is a great website and B2G is a great website. Welcome and good luck. i plan to have surgery in April, I'm self paying which is hard, but I'm worth it.

I have to say that I don't have a band yet, however, I did get to goal and felt totally naked. I didn't know how to move in my new body. I am basically shy and felt very exposed and vulnerable. I really understand what you mean by not feeling like yourself. Basically, you are you, but really the outside is totally different. This time I have some things in place to help me cope. I have been going to therapy for four years, working out for two and will continue as I lose weight, get banded, etc. I know it will feel really raw and painful, but I have chosen to feel my feelings and allow them to wear themselves out. I won't need to overeat to "cover" up again. But I am finally beginning to understand why I felt what I did every time I lost weight. With the band, this time it's a one way trip. I hope sharing this helped, write me privately if this is close to your experience.

Why am I fat? :omg: Boy, I've been in therapy for years, uncovering my issues. It is like peeling an onion. Sometimes the skin just falls off and other times I really have to dig, and it comes off uneven and smelly. One thing I do know is that FOOD is a lie, not the answer, and fat is the result. I think I am fat because I convinced myself when I was a toddler that food was the comfort I needed. Food was survival. My eating seemed to please the people around me and was reinforced with smiles and "good girl." (However, I wasn't "fat" at this time, just a little short and round) Then in early adolescence I was told over and over again that I would be FAT if I kept eating so much. But eating was how I gave myself comfort, used to make others happy, and helped me feel safe. When there was tension at home I ate to feel better. Like fat could protect me from the scary world. A self-fulfilling prophesy I gained weight. (I gained 10 - 15 pounds above a normal weight ) Into adolescence ( I got my period at age 10) I was scared of my sexual development and found that fat covered my desirability. I was shy and didn't want to be different from others. I was desparately lonely and frightened. If I was round my breasts weren't so big. Parents started an all out campaign to get rid of the extra weight. I dug in my heels, couldn't understand the dramatic change from "You're gonna get fat," to "You are fat," "OMG you embarrass us!" Dad was a pediatrician and mom was a sociallite. I felt ashamed, ignored and unloved. I ate for comfort and protection. Eating was the only mechanism that I knew. (My weight went up another 30 - 40 pounds, especially documented with weekly weigh-ins at my father's office - another type of torture, but attention.) The tension of an early adolescence seemed to ease in teen life. More freedom of movement and expression. The constant focus on my weight eased when mom got pregnant. I went on a starvation diet and got down to "normal." Which I maintained into college. Still emotionally clueless, ripe for frequent gain/loss patterns. (After college I was within 20 pounds of "normal") The rest of my life followed the similar patterns of my early life, however, the problems were bigger and longer and so was the eating. Several diets were attempted, WW, Nutrisystem, Optifast, Weight Loss Center, each time losing some and gaining more. At age 40 I was back to a normal weight after 6 months of Optifast ( from 169 - 120), easiest diet ever, because I didn't have to deal with food. But I living with and alcoholic abusive husband, had two adopted 3 year old sons and a full time job. I ate all those pounds I'd lost and 20 more just to get a sense of safety, security, stability - kind of like ballast for my life. I divorced the abusive/alcoholic husband and two years later found the love of my life. My first boyfriend, Ira. He loved me like I never been loved and life was great for two years, and then he got really sick. It took 3 years for him to die at age 52, and about 25 more pounds. Since that time efforts at weight loss seem to work for about 25 - 40 pounds, but now I am around 220. I am 57 have some medical issues that are weight related and am still wanted to feel safe and comfortable. I have done some positive things for myself.:clap2: 1) Work out 4 to 5 times a week & with a trainer 2xs/wk 2) Retired from teaching (very stressful job) 3) Express my artistic side through painting and quilting 4) Maintain my health through medication, which has brought me here. I believe that I need the banding for support during the rest of my life. I am an emotional eater, and I know people have been able to get around the banding by eating ice cream, etc. but I have decided that I deserve to have a healthy life. (this is my new mantra) So that's my story, not unlike the millions of stories out there. I think there is healing in the writing, so thanks for the opportunity. If I hit a nerve of recognition in anyone, I understand because I see myself if what you share. We are a community of people who have turned to food for comfort and security - but it's been a lie. Food doesn't really make me feel better, or take care of my fears, or cover my sexuality or help me cope with stress. :rockon: I deserve to live a heathy life.

Thanks for all the support and information. I think it is wonderful to have this website to ask these questions. I already work out 4 -5 times a week at the gym, so part of my journey is underway. I deserve to have a healthy life, at whatever age! Thanks again,

I am considering surgery in April due to a trip planned in March. Are there any other "older" patients out there? :phanvan Am I crazy at 57 to be considering this surgery? I have 100 pounds to lose to be a "normal" weight and have other issues like Type 2 diabetes and high blood pressure. I feel like the band is the perfect tool to support my weight loss process, and not regain the weight. Which has been a lifelong pattern. I'll be watching and hope to hear from you. Thanks,