CowgirlJane

I have massive curly/kinky hair. I often get asked how i keep it looking so good and here are a few tips that might apply to people with similiar hair: -Wear it up in a bun at night - use those soft scrunches that don't rip hair out. This keeps it from tangling. Detangling breaks hair off which is the last thing you need when you are losing alot of hair. -I gave up shampoo and moved to the "no poo" method. I started out with the Wen method and then realized any good quality conditioner essentially works for me. My hair is never greasy or gross and i only shampoo if I get clorine or something like that on it - maybe once every few months -I gently detangle after soaking in conditioner (during my shower, instead of shampoo) with a very wide tooth comb. Then, I never run a comb or brush through it again as that makes FRIZZ. - then put in a product to help defrizz and encourage curls. Or not. The key is to NEVER run a brush, comb or fingers through it - haven't noticed that the products make much difference but they do tend to add a bit of shine. Curly hair is prone to dull looking versus straight hair so i like a bit of shine added. - If I must blowdry it, it is done very carefully with a defuser. Mostly, I let it air dry. And... never touch it again end result are natural curls that hold up to humidity etc. I can wear it partially up and get those little ringlets. I sometimes wear it in a low side ponytail etc, but very loose. Curly hair is not well suited to tight buns or pony tails - go with that beach wind tossled look. and... never touch it again!

I had a lot of skin but no rashes and it could be held in with island so didnt interfere with exercise etc....No insurance for me either even though I lost massive weight. It really transformed me though and helped make me feel normal. I am no longer a deflated obese person...just look normal.

I did not lose hair.. and I really focused on protein to help with healing

I have luckily reached the age/stage in life where my "give a Damn is busted" I have felt EXCEPTIONALLY well supported by work colleagues but if I had not I would have no trouble ignorng their petty gossipy ways whilst I sauntered in looking like a million bucks. New hairdo, make over, cute outfit, combined with your thinner healthier self... jokes on them.

When I met the guy i just started seeing he was so freaked out because he forgot his wallet. He wanted me to wait while he went home to get it... 20 minutes round trip. I told him I was okay with buying our drinks. ..and I'd be gone if he left to get his wallet so he might as well sit down and relax. We wound up having a marvelous first date, having dinner and not just drinks. He ended it by saying ..."ah ha... you HAVE to see me again so I can take you out". Our second date he took me to a very nice place and we had a wonderful date. We have gone out several times now including all day on his boat 3 times where he insists on hosting everything, grills yummy food etc. My point is that weirdness can happen and you have to roll with it and take a chance if he otherwise seems cool.

Wow I like to hope this is legit. Let us know.

Don't be stressed just want to clarify factual statements. I am not a bypass expert but they staple off part of the stomach and change the intestines. It is reversible because that stomach is still there. The sleeve is completely permanent because they remove about 80 to 85 percent of the stomache. That is a scary thought but I finally realized mine was defective and too big and now it feels normal...

Ok this I agree with only I call them jaded. I was in that rut myself to some extent really wanting someone but then afraid of w ha t he might expect of me. It was a break through when I said to myself that I want someone and as long as I am honest about my "headspace" he can choose me or not... and I am good with that. It was about 2 weeks from my little epiphany that I met the.man I just started seeing.

The stomach is NOT removed for the bypass.

Me too.. especially since I would love to recruit a 13 yo girl to ride my older horse . Tino joked that he can't meet my my sons for a year cuz I told him Steven never met them even after seeing each other for a year. Of course that was a different kind of relationship but I am still cautious on this point

I don't understand this statement.

I can't help but wonder if these dudes know what the word love means?

I only vomited a handful of times - and I would say it wasn't until I was a couple of months out, on solid foods and perhaps feeling a little cocky... well really I was eating too fast. I apparently had not sufficiently broken that bad habit. I was so paranoid - in the early weeks and was very very careful. Be aware that you can;t really feel everything in those first 3-6 weeks so I ate "by the book" measuring everything and watching the clock to know when to eat. I felt that was the best way to avoid accidental overeating in those initial weeks. I am 2.5 years out and never vomit (I did constantly with the band) so I guess I have learned something finally!

I lost massive amounts, but, while receiving many compliments on my newly evolving body, nobody ever said "what the heck happened to your hair? it's horrible!!" At 2.5 years post op... the garbage cans full of hair is just a distant memory.... My point is that we can get kind of worried over these things (understandably) but could probably benefit from just relaxing a bit and realize that in the end things will work out. Eat as best you can, take your supplements and then let the chips (or hair) fall as it may...

Have you been following the various threads about so many of us being bullies? It seems to have started with a post by someone who wanted to know who smoked, had surgery and lived to tell about it. A few people were less than diplomatic in their replies. Then I think it was either lipstick lady or madame reverie started a thread called "we are all adults here" where there was a fair amount of silliness and a little bit of belittling frankly. Now the latest is the bariatric bullies thread. http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/309338-bariatric-bullies-you-know-who-you-are/page-5 So, what I think about this is I was called a bully by someone a few months ago and I think he was completely out of line. It is like bully has become the new word you can call someone and it is is "irrefutable" ... like if somebody labels me (or anyone) a bully it is simply the truth because the "victim" called it that. Flip side, some people like to be funny, witty or sometimes just really direct and I think say the truth in hurtful ways. Many obese people are super overly sensitve too... I should just not read the threads, but at times it makes me wonder if I am getting as much out of this website as I put into it...

Thanks. I lost 133 the first 12 months. It took me 14 months to lose 150# and get to my goal of 158. That goal put me at around a size 10 non stretch pants/medium top. (although with size variation I also wore some 8s). Now I wear more like a size 6 pants (although i own some 4s) but because of my boobs I still take a medium in most tops - small if they are stretchy or generously sized.

I have gained a shocking 6 pounds in just a few days. I ate alot this weekend (I have been working on improving appetite so that was considered good) but I think the real trick was coming off my horse, not once, but twice this weekend. I haven't fallen in 9 years and then to have it happen twice...oy boy! First fall, the horse actually fell off the the trail so it wasn't too big of a fall for me - I was basically already on the ground when I lept off. Bumped an elbow and finger but continued the ride. Next day, my horse took issue with the concept of firing a gun off her back even though it was just primer (learning to do a sport called cowboy mounted shooting) The real issue was that i could not get the gun reholstered quick enough to get her under control (my borrowed holster was for righty and i am a lefty). It was a fairly light fall - landed on my feet first and then went down on my right side. Right side is not sore, but my waist, hip and left knee apparently got a good twist as there is visible bruising and pain. And swelling even after icing - I suspect that accounts for some of those "insta-pounds" So there you go - in case anyone wants to know how to gain weight FAST! haha

I appreciate that people feel this way and I am sorry that feelings are hurt. I never intend to "bully" anyone. I was accused of it once because i took issue with a sweeping generalization somebody made that shall we say, touched close to home. My politely disagreeing was called bullying - so it goes. It is hard to know how people take things sometimes though and lets be honest here - weight loss surgery, obesity, losing massive weight and all that causes emotional turmoil and people can be very sensitive too. In other words, some of the things may be "taken" alot harsher than they were ever intended. Flip side, there are many of us veterans who take alot of time to share out stories, give encouragement, answer questions, answer private messages of info that is freely available elsewhere, I have even talked on the phone with people seeking support. I do it because I remember what it felt like and I remember that people feel the need to have THEIR questions answered even if it is the same as others have asked. This is scary, life changing business here. I am not seeking acknowledgement from any of you on this point - I am merely mentioning this because I have observed a few people who I think provide very valuable info, insight and support being attacked for being a bully when what I see is a fairly factual accounting of how they have experienced success post surgery. Maybe the delivery could be sweeter, but, not everyone is gifted with the silver tongue of a diplomat.

Banded in March 2001 at 272; lost 30# in the first month on an all liquid diet and took another 11 months to lose another almost 40# and got down to about 205. All time highest weight was in 2005 - highest recorded was 332 Band removed in Sept 2011; sleeved December 2011 at 308. Hit goal of 158 in February 2013 Current weight around 140-142. That is a loss of over 160# - about 190 from my lifetime high. unbelievable, even to me!!!!

I was banded for 10 years - epic fail. Not only was I scared of another surgery, but I was scared of failing again and I was scared of the permanance. I had one basic question "what if it is as awful as the band but I can't reverse it?" Well, I reached the point where I felt I had no choice but to leap in. It took me over a year of wrestling with this before I finally had the band removed. Surgeons were adament it needed to go before it slipped further. I couldn't get courage up to do the sleeve, but I was preapproved for insurance. Then, I found out my insurance was changing and i had a "last chance" to get insurance coverage for the sleeve - so i went for it in Dec 2011. Now 160+ pounds lost - I weigh around 140 instead of around 300-315 and it was the best decision ever!

Well, the guy makes snide remarks about men too, I think that is just his style. What I took issue with is the presumption that all women workout for the same reason - to look hot for guys. While that may be MY motivation I am sure there are a few women who work out to feel good, improve their health, get stronger, lose weight, improve their aerobic conditioning, live longer, remain more mobile and limber, meet athletic goals like running marathons etc. So, he used the example of how awful runners look, which is bull because I happen to find a lean, long muscled look very attractive. To say that runners have high body fat is also kinda a nutty remark really. He also leaves out the genetic component of results. I always thought I must be strong because i have visible muscles - nope - turns out my genetics gives me that defined muscle look from working out and doesn't mean I am fitter or do a better job of working out then the next woman making mistakes at the gym... I do agree that many people don't have a clue when they work out though and therefore don't get great results. I have made the mistakes of following alot of general guidelines that didn't really pay off that well. My uninformed opinion, based on my personal results only - the best results are garnished from a combination of high intensity interval training and doing workouts that use your own body weight as resistance like TRX, boot camp style (or crossfit style) type stuff as long as you don't kill yourself in the process. Long duration exercise gets you other benefits, but shorter duration high intensity helped me lose weight and at least appear more tones. Yeah, my bodyfat % is still about 27%, higher than I prefer but well within the range of normal for a 49 year old woman who used to be morbidly obese.

Well, I had quite the weekend. Horse related injuries... turns out my horse does NOT like having a gun fired by someone on her back..haha.. even if it is just primer shots. I would have stayed on except that the gun safety rules are that you reholster your pistol before dealing with an out of control horse. I am left handed and the clinic provided the gear - the holsters were set for right handed persons. Comedy of errors and I fell off. Ouch. I fell pretty light, almost stayed on my feet so the side I hit the ground is not sore at all. The opposite side - my hip, waist and knee are sore - they all got twisted. Ouch. That happened Sat so I decided to accept Tino's invite to go boating on Sunday instead of my riding plans. I had mixed feelings because it was a boat party with his 13 year old daughter (who I hadn't met) and a bunch of her friends. It was super fun though, glad I went. We worked out the whole issue around the cancellation. He kinda freaked out on me a little bit after that whole dinner fiasco and turns out he has alot of stuff in life (ie he discovered a leak in his roof and needs to do major home repair plus some business related stuff) and was feeling panicked like he didn't have time for a girlfriend etc. I had one of those... "you gotta be kidding me... I could have stayed with Steven for this bull" moments. Instead, I was calm and mature and just asked what he wanted. He told me he wants to see me and just was feeling like he had screwed it all up. I let him know that I am a grown up, we don't need to see each other all the time and we don't need to have 10 hour dates (the boating) so why don't we just chill a little, cut back a little, and take care of some stuff in life. He was so happy, relieved and it seems to me we are still talking everyday and seeing each other every few days... which is PLENTY for me. Plenty, really. I enjoy my time with Tino a great deal although there are a few things about him that raise some of concerns about long term compatibility BUT I was looking for a boyfriend to do fun stuff with, that I enjoy talking to and that matches my energy - he is really a good match for all that, and I figure enjoy it while it lasts! His youngest daughter - the 13 year old - is a complete doll. I like her alot and was surprised how warm and friendly she was to me. I am not sure I would have been that way at that age to a strange woman taking a parent's attention. I hear she approved of my pictures on POF early on and told her dad he should marry me because of my horses...haha. kids.

Go low carb and change exercise routine to high intensity to shake things up. I lost after he 12 month mark.

I am still seeing the guy i met recently. He seems genuine which for me is huge. I did adjust my standards as far as looks goes because I realized that my holding out for a hottie was leading me to jerks. So I personally think that those of us that are older (i am 49) are so jaded, it really interferes with finding love. Middle age guys that look good have their pick of 30 year olds. My new friend is tall and good looking but a bit of a belly and not the Robert Redford look alike I had been holding out for..haha. so far, good call as he treats me like a princess and I love being around him. We go boating and it's just plain fun! Me, I just want companionship, a guy to do fun things with, who I enjoy being with. I think clarity of what I wanted helped alot too.

Hi... is your gas pain from the lap surgery (in your shoulder etc) or do you mean digestive gas? Have you tried gas X strips? Walking is one of the best ways to work out gas from lap surgery too. I think easy does it walks also make you feel better emotionally. Did you say it is getting harder to sip Water? Did you mention this to surgeon? If you get dehydrated you will feel awful and maybe need iv fluids. By 6-8 weeks it will be alot better but it was closer to 12 before I felt human! I have lost over 160# though. ..so worth it!! The early weeks really suck but it gets better I promise.