In a deeply emotional moment, I sat down and wrote a list in order of importance. I will share it here, in case it helps anybody organize their thoughts, emotions, and priorities.

6/25/2014 RNY Surgery Goals

• To be able to eat half a yogurt and be satisfied, full, and fortified.

• to no longer be consumed with healthy food shopping and meal preps, the miseries of weighing cabbage, and be satisfied with my minimal needs.

• to get off my blood pressure medication

• Lower my cholesterol to normal levels

• to beat the odds of my family’s heart disease

• to be able to navigate stairs without dislocating my knees

• to be able to walk down the stairs and see past my stomach so I don’t trip

• To be able to get up from a chair without leaving a sweat-spot

• to be able to wear dresses without leggings, and not chafe my thighs

• to see my knee bones and ankles

• to be able to pick up a tissue from the floor without waiting for more things to accumulate before bending down

• to be able to walk for more than 10 minutes before my heel spurs start throbbing

• to breathe easier for longer periods and not trigger my asthma

• to sing for two hours straight without throat pain

• to sit on the floor with my clients and play guitar.

• to send all my old clothes to Lisa and Beka

• be able to play a narrow-neck guitar

• play the violin without colliding my fingers

• enjoy airplane flights without stopping the circulation in my legs because my thighs are squeezed in between the neighboring armrests

• to be able to lift and move objects without throwing my back into spasms

• to be able to wear trendy shoes with less support

• be done with granny-panties

• to be able to buy size medium clothes on the sales rack

• to be a normal-looking healthy American

Thank you. A lot of you goals really hit home.

My list is smaller but here goes,

To be able to walk around without my shorts scrunching up between my legs.

Sit without being aware of my roll

Be able to navigate stairs and not fear falling again.

Get pictures taken with the gift card hubby bought me 4 years ago

Feel good in my scuba gear

See desire I my husbands eyes again

Lose fat around "certain" body parts so it doesn't look so swollen and puffy.

Be able to quickly wipe deodorant quickly on my armpits, not roll it on in swaths.

Not constantly obsess about body odor.

Wear a hat.... Right now my big fat face looks like a melon when i wear a hat.

Feel good when we go on vacation. Not hot, frumpy and fat

Wow, this really makes me realize how much i need to lose 60 lbs!

Thank you

Thank you so much for sharing. It really makes me feel less alone when staring at my "shit just got real" list. I added "eliminate Water retention in my feet"

Your welcome. I second the water retention. I can't wait to vacation without my feet looking like big fat slugs!