What if you lost your band today?

I was banded July 15, 2008. I got down to my goal weight of 135, but loosing all the weight set off my brain shunt and caused me to have to have a brain shunt revision on July 4, 2010. I gained 20 pounds back from eating ice cream and crap after my brain surgery this year because I was in stress and pitty mode. I was doing it for about 3 months solid and I saw the weight creep on pretty fast and it freaked me out.

Now yesterday a person that got banded the same day as I did and by the same doctor had to have emergency surgery to have her lap band removed. This is the 2nd person I know directly I've seen this happen to. It just ate into the wall of her stomach. She thinks maybe it was from letting her band be too tight from fills for too long.

I went back to the dietitian and explained that I was at goal, but gained 20 back and I need to get back to goal. He said that this far out your body has adjusted to eating 900-1200 calories a day so no dieting in the world is going to get the weight off now. I need to exercise it off in addition to diet and that he see's the re-bound effect like this quite often. Now what if I had a slip or had to have my band removed. No way could I eat 900 calories a day on my own. If I'm struggling now with the band, what if I lost the band?

I'm having port revision surgery on Dec. 8th because my port is flipped sideways and has been for about 6 months now and looks like a babys fist sticking out of my gut near my waist band. They are giving me a low profile port. I'm nervous because I've seen everyone around me that I know personally who's had lapband either have a port revision, a removal from erosion, or lost only 30 pounds or less after a year or a year plus.

Everyone says be grateful I came this far and quit being hung up on the numbers and forget about getting back to 135. I'm just in panic mode thinking if I loose this band, I'm back to being fat for sure because I'm struggling now.