c_wade

Hi everyone! First post here...was too loopy before surgery on the liver-shrinking diet to post, but I'm drinking protein now, and have my wits about me (somewhat)...today has been rough, not sure if I'm withdrawing from Percocet but I've been tired and headachey. I also have to remember I have autoimmune arthritis, so this all can't be any picnic in terms of mixing that with the last six days... Had RNY gastric bypass done last Monday here in NYC at Mount Sinai St. Luke's. Everything went great. I got home Tuesday afternoon. Not a ton of pain but a lot of soreness around the midsection that made it tough to sleep, so took Percocet at night to help with that. Ran out last night, so also must keep that in mind, re: cranky- and out-of-sorts-ness. *Trigger Warning* Eating disorders... I went through the food dream "phase" (hoping it is just a phase, LOL), and also had weird thoughts today -- straight up addict thoughts -- like, what if I eat my favorite ice cream bar, bite by bite, chew by chew, and just spit it out down the garbage disposal? That way I'm not causing any trouble... Having been in alcohol recovery some time, I know that thinking to be downright insane. I have purged / restricted in my life, but that would be pretty blatant bulimia! Glad I could share that, and hope I haven't triggered anyone too badly. Anyway, I did this from a place of seeking health, taking stress off my back (which was fused after a slipped disc last year), reducing the autoimmune pain, reducing anxiety about being seen in public, as my weight spiraled out of control due to poor stress management through emotional eating. Cosmetics were last on the list, really just a bonus. Anyway, this forum is amazing, and hope to read more of you soon.