j1540801

So... I just got approved! ☺

Sometimes crying can be viewed by healthcare professionals and some people in general as weak or neurotic. I quit crying in front of others at 8 years old when my grandmother yelled at me and told me it made me look ugly. Then when my father hit me because I wouldn't give him the satisfaction. I learned to cry in private.
He used to beat my Mom over whether food was on the table at a certain time or if the meal was missing a condiment or not to his liking. I told my bariatric psych this is why I only ate when hungry or skipped meals. I fasted for days sometimes. I was neither anorexic nor bulimic. What I couldn't understand as a child or adult was how someone (dad) could act that way over food. So, it was easy for me not to think about eating till hungry. Then I ate whatever I wanted. Usually for pleasure. Usually not healthy choices.
I saw the therapist 3 times within 3 months. First was initial greeting. Second was a 2–3-hour test I took in the office on their computer. Third was to go over my test score. I wasn't sure if I would get clearance since I was honest about my eating habits, but she said she felt I had already dealt with the mental reasonings in how I ate and believed my weight gain was more physiological.
I'm not saying it's wrong to cry @saramelie and it's good to talk things out with a therapist. It was a first for me and I too questioned what I should share or not but it's for the best to get on with it so you can move forward to a better you. GL!!!

When it comes to your medical team honesty and openness are extremely important, perhaps critically important. What we may believe are small or unimportant things may not actually be so. My personal belief is that I'm going to share anything and everything of which I can think. They are the experts and it's up to them to use or discard information as they see fit.
Pragmatically, they have your $18,000 in hand. The last thing they want to do is give that $18,000 back to you. They have already planned how they are going to spend their money.
Similar to you I was a binge eater and drinker, though my diagnosis is severe OCD. My feelings were that if one is good, one dozen is better. I was honest talking about it with the shrink and the surgeon. All of us got to being obese, or as in my case, super-morbidly obese, by eating and drinking habits that were nowhere even in the neighborhood of normal eating. Not being honest about how we got to where we are would indicate that we are still in the throws of an eating/drinking problem we haven't even acknowledged [yet].
Good luck,
Tek

I just ordered the isopure flavorless! Who needs a gall bladder anyways ?

I couldn't tolerate sweet things for the first few months - like sweet protein shakes (I drank a lot of Unjury chicken broth shakes). And I couldn't eat bananas for like three years - too sweet.

Well, this certainly went in an unexpected direction.

I think the OP basically wanted us to tell her that there was some way for her to both lose her weight and make no further changes (because "sacrifices suck").

I did want to add one thing, though, for the future people who read this. Your body can carry an INSANE amount of poop. So the OP, starting her post-colon-cleanse weight, already was down as much as ten pounds (I ? you not!) just from having it all out of her.

And it doesn't matter which scale you use as long as you use the same scale every time.

No worries...for what it is worth. I may come off cold at times but I am truly trying to help. I truly believe that people can be successful in their journey if they get out of their own way and commit. Some people need a good boot in the ass at times to open their eyes and get serious.

I was attacked for being honest with this person because I saw what you all saw recently right from the beginning. This person wanted the easy way out, would not weight food, would not give up Indian Food, wanted to have her desserts etc, etc.
Case Rested. This was either a troll or someone who just does not want to do what it takes to be succesful and wants to blame it on the surgery, others, human nature etc.

As an ESGer myself, it is crystal clear that the procedure should have NEVER been done in the first place. The OP does not have and most likely never had the mindset needed in order for the ESG procedure (or any other type of WLS) to be successful. Shame on the clinic who preformed the procedure. With that being said, OP you wanted a quick, easy fix. Sorry, it just doesn't work that way.

If this isn’t a troll post…

Sacrifices DO suck, but that's called being an adult. I don't want to do my expense reports but I have to if I want to keep my job. I don't want to do my laundry or take a shower, but I have to because that's what an adult does.
I HATE exercise, but I do it anyway, because it gets me to my goals. I miss eating big desserts and big meals, definitely. If you're looking for sympathy, you've got mine.
But... if you want your outcomes to change, you have to change your inputs

Nobody said suck it up and try harder. I'm saying, go back and look at your previous posts. There are things, very tangible things, that can be changed. There are no miracle cures. But if you want to keep things as they are, that's completely up to you. I'm not here to judge you. It's not my place. But if you want things to be different, there are things to change. The first being your mindset. I know you can do this, but it will require a different set of actions and way of thinking. I wish you well no matter what you decide, but if you work WITH your surgeon and dietician and work on changing your mindset and then you will be able to change your actions and what/how you eat. Once you do that, the results will come.

1. Restaurants: I eat out about 90% of my meals because I travel for work. I just think carefully about what I'm eating and I stop when I've had enough.
2. Sweets: You just... have to make some changes in order to get the results you want. I have always had a sweet tooth, made worse by medications I take for bipolar disorder... but... I try not to eat sweets much now, and when I do, I use sugar free sweets or have a tiny piece. I CAN eat too much sweets without my restriction kicking in. It's up to me to make the choice that aligns with my goals for long term weight loss
3. Nice food: I love nice food. I just don't need to make it the only thing in my life anymore. I enjoy almost all of my meals, especially when I can enjoy them with friends or family, but it's not the only thing in my life (and I'm Italian!).

It kinda sounds like you want to have your cake and eat the whole thing - you can't eat every single thing as much as you want and lose weight, and only have a surgery that is less effective, and not take time off from work, and not like fat people and not weigh your food... We all want it all, but it's just not possible. I would love to have NOT had this surgery that makes me uncomfortable all the time. But I wanted to be thin. I think you really haven't made up your mind what it is you want yet.

I love this so much!!!

If I'm honest, I think part of the problem is that you went into this for the wrong reasons, and because of that, you don't have the motivation to do the work necessary to get the results you want. It sounds like you wanted a miracle cure that would melt the weight off without you having to make any sacrifices or changes, and it just doesn't work that way. Granted, the surgery you chose doesn't have the results others do, but it does still produce results if you work the program. But you sound resistant to any of the suggestions being given, unless someone else does it for you. You have to take accountability for yourself, what and how you eat, and the pitfalls and successes you have. You get out what you put in. I don't think your doctors were correct in letting you have a WLS knowing your psychological issues and that you only wanted it for vanity's sake. This is a major step that requires lifelong changes. Those who transition know that and are ready and willing to make the changes to live in the bodies they always believed they should have. But transitioning isn't about vanity. It's about feeling and believing you are a different gender and getting the procedures done to make their outside match their insides. I believe you can do this. And I believe you want it. But you will have to find the motivation and the desire to do the work and help yourself before it will work. The results you want are 100% within reach, as long as you're willing to change your mindset and do the work. And I know you can, if you want it bad enough.

This is going to be long so bear with me.
First, let’s do the numbers.
Your starting weight post clean out was 251. Your weight now on that same-ish scale is 215, that’s a 36lb loss.
With ESG the average weight loss is about 10-20% of total body weight at a year meaning at 251lbs your average for 10-20% would be 25.1-50.2. Your actual weight loss is 36 for 14.34%.
With ESG the total percentage of total body weight loss at 5 years from one study of 203 patients is only about 14.5% if follow up with providers is recurring most saw their biggest amount lost at 2 years post ESG.
It seems that you’re on track for what that study suggests. I wouldn’t sweat it too much.
Secondly, however I do want to offer some suggestions for food. Focusing on high volume, low calorie foods can offer bulk because you’ll have more to chew. For example- A 100g of cucumber is only 15 calories while 100g of cooked pasta is 160. If you miss pasta try tofu shirataki noodles- an entire 8oz package is about 20 calories depending on brand. These can sit a bit heavy though depending on the person.
Salads full of leafy greens, fruits and vegetables with minimal dressing can help you feel full. They also provide crunch which I myself enjoy.
Season your food!- bland food can be boring and unfulfilling and loads of “diet” food recipes lack flavor. Adding spices can help make things you’re eating more enjoyable and trick your brain into being satisfied quicker.
Try roasted chickpeas- 1 can chickpeas drained and rinsed then tossed with garlic powder, paprika, onion powder, and chili powder (if you tolerate spicy) with a tsp of olive oil then baked at 350°F for about 25 minutes makes a great topping for salads while providing protein and fiber, both of which help keep you full.
Lastly, make sure you’re following your clinic’s guidelines for liquids before and after meals. Drinking too soon after eating can make you feel hungry sooner and sabotage your hard work. If you can’t bear the thought of giving up liquids with all your meals try soup! Broth based soups are a great way to get in fluids, vegetables, protein, and flavor.

I am sorry you feel that way. I was assuming you wanted truthful advice, not just to have people reassure you that everything is going to be ok even if they don't believe that. I will never post to your account again if you don't actually want help to be succesful.

Unhelpful and mean? No maam. I just try to be honest with people and tell them the truth. There is something not right about what is going on there. 20 pounds after a year is not success and to say so is not helpful to the poster. If you want to just be told what you want to hear, then do not post. This is trying to help people, not just make them feel good and continue doing what they are doing.

That internalized fat-phobia is difficult to deal with. I struggle with it too.
But I'm really confused by your timeline. You had surgery in March 2021? And you've lost 36lb? So, how much weight did your surgery center expect you to lose in that time? I don't know about ESG, but with sleeve, I was told I would lose most of the weight in the first year, and that I could expect to lose about 60-70 lbs, give or take.
Were you weighing yourself every week/day at home?
I really think you need to reach out to your surgery center (virtually is fine!) and see if you are on target, and if not, if they have any recommendations. There are medications that you can take, and there might be a role for a nutritionist to see what food changes they might recommend. Maybe you're not eating enough? We are just guessing here. You need to talk to a professional.

This may sound like a weird question, but which scale did you use to determine your starting weight?
Here is what I mean: if the 251 mark is based on your home scale and your home scale is off by 15 pounds, doesn't that mean you started at 266 on the work scale?

So, I hate to be a wet blanket here and I know everyone is trying to be supportive, but to get major weight loss surgery and after a year being only 22 pounds lighter seems to me to be a bit of a failure....I am just being brutally honest. Part of supporting people is to sometimes tell them the truth and try to get them to take action. If I were in the same situation, I would go back to a low calorie, high protein, low fat, low/no carb diet and get exercising ASAP. The fact is, there has to be a calorie deficit and it we are gaining weight back, there is an issue with that deficit. Maybe we are not counting all our calories....maybe we are not counting at all......maybe we are doing ZERO exercise......maybe a lot of things but what we do know is that it is not working and we are gaining weight. It is time to reevaluate EVERYTHING and get back to what made weight come of in the first place.

Stop. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. Take a deep breath. In fact, take three. Working yourself into a frenzy isn't going to help anything.
Now let's evaluate.
It sounds like the scale at work is accurate based on your "test" of it. Try your scale at home again, and if it's wildly off, chuck it out. It's broken. So, with that being said, it sounds like you're 235 lbs. Now we have to figure out why that is so we can begin changing it.
First of all, as a 5'5 woman, 1200 calories is hardly a deficit in the long-term. It may be initially, but your body will adjust, and your metabolism will slow to compensate. Nowadays, it may even be a bit more than you need. My surgeon, who was a pioneer in bariatric surgery and has done thousands of procedures, said that most people only need 1000-1500 calories a day. There are obvious exceptions for athletes and whatnot, but generally speaking, that's the rule for both men and women.
Now, I know you don't want to hear me simply tell you to eat less. However, if you can find a couple hundred calories to cut out from your current diet, it definitely won't hurt. To me, it sounds like your body found a comfort zone with 1200 a day and whatever level of activity you have, and it stopped dropping weight as a result. Just to be sure though, are you POSITIVE you're only eating 1200 calories a day? There are hidden calories everywhere. Passing by the candy dish at work a couple times a day, oil in the pan, a glass of wine with dinner, cream and sugar in your coffee, etc, will all add up.
Now, as someone who just got himself out of a stall by doing this, here's going to be my biggest suggestion. You've heard it before, it isn't sexy, but it works.
Cut whatever amount of carbs you're eating by at least 50% and get rid of anything made with flour or sugar entirely. You're only supposed to be eating 1000-1200 calories a day, and you can't afford to spend them on starch. You may feel like crap for a week, but I guarantee you that you won't feel like crap when you see the number on the scale going down. Plus, it's also incredibly easy to end up eating far more calories than you intended when you're eating this stuff. It takes most people 3-4 bites to eat a 200 calorie serving of pasta.

First thing to remember is you’ve lost weight & inches. Whoo hoo. Celebrate each one of those pounds & inches.
Secondly we all lose at our own rate. There is no one correct amount of weight you have to lose by a certain date. There can’t be as we’re not the same. My physiological make up & medical history is different to yours & everyone else's. There are just averages which should be only be used as a guide to what’s possible not what’s a certainty. Some people are just slow losers & some lose more quickly. Certainly the more you have to lose the faster you lose at first.
1200 calories seems to be quite a common goal for those who are given one & it’s not based on height but is generally considered a low calorie diet. As long as you’re following your plan you’re on the right path.
Scales can be different. They are just machines. Even things like the floor they’re on can affect their accuracy. I weigh differently on my scales, my doctor’s scale & my surgeon’s scale. Some of that is what I’m wearing, time of day, whether I’ve pooped, eaten, etc. They keep their starting & progress records & I keep mine. I don’t compare what their scales say to what mine does. As long as the numbers were going down in their records I was happy (now as long as it’s stable I’m happy). Unless you weighed yourself on the work scales at the very beginning you can’t place value in what they say now - nothing to compare it to. You likely would have weighed heavier on them back then too.
So have you failed & f*cked up? No!
PS - Hate to tell you 5’5” is not short but is about average height. In fact in the US the average height for an adult woman is 5’4”.

Hi. I know that we all had our different reasons for having WLS. I did it because I was fed up with yo-yo dieting. I was on-off Keto diet for over two years. I've lost some weight and gained it all back in the end. The longest I've stayed on diet was 5 months and that paid off really well (lost 25 kg). But then Covid-19 hit.
I was about to go back to Keto diet in January 22 when my sister called to tell me she was going for the mini gastric bypass. That was the first time time I've heard of it. Fast forward three weeks and I'm on the plane flying to Egypt to have mine.
My "breaking point" was finally going back to work in the office and having to remove the arm rests of my office chair because it somehow "shrunk" and was squeezing my thighs.
How about you? What made you decide to have the surgery and what was the breaking point?

I am 2 years out, I had the sleeve. I have some issues but not that much.
I take OTC meds and it helps a lot
I just know the stuff that will make it happen, eating to fast, eating tomato based stuff..and stress lol