crazygoose

Thanks everyone! I'm at my grandparent's house and feeling great physically. My grandpa is slowly coming around he still believes I will get sick but it just gives me incentive to take good care of myself and prove him wrong. I haven't had to take pain meds since two nights ago and the biggest fear I had was that I'd feel pain after surgery and it's just not the case. I definitely feel my sleeve though when I eat and drink. I'm used to eating/drinking fast and the sleeve definitely let's me know when I'm doing it too fast. As for my mom I'm going to cut her out of my life for a bit. I just can't deal with her she has no remorse and then turns around and blames me so I am done I'm going to move forward as if she is dead until she gets her life together.

As for a ride home I had gotten in contact with a distant relative I can't rely on my mom especially after what she just did to me. She went through my mail at my grandparents house where Im staying until after my surgery whe n I'm able to finish moving into my apartment and stole my new debit card and somehow activated it and spent some of my money. I was able to catch it before she spent too much money and had the card locked. I can't believe she would do this while I'm in the hospital. Sent from my SGH-T399N using the BariatricPal App

Once again thank you everyone for your kind words and support. @Twinkle Toes I actually feel really good I had to ask the nurses several times if I even got the surgery and they said yes. Sent from my SGH-T399N using the BariatricPal App

Ugh did it again and can't delete this from my phone. >.<

Accidentally reposted

So I had my surgery and it was a success! My mom did take me to my surgery (got me there a half hour late then blamed me for not rushing her enough even though I did and got yelled for it) I called my grandpa after my surgery and he was being nice to me.I'm alright, feeling good actually although my blood pressure is a little high and heart rate is kinda low but I don't feel it and have been walking around with no problem. I have so much energy as well. Once again thank you all for your support and encouragement as well as kind words with it I regained my confidence and hope. For that I love you all!!! Sent from my SGH-T399N using the BariatricPal App

Thank you all for your kind words and support. It really means a lot to me. Tomorrow the plan is to wake up at 4:30am and call my mom at 5am and see if she will follow through. If not I will catch the 5:30 bus and I should be at the hospital before 7 and check in is at 7:30am. I should've been asleep by now but I have been very busy tonight getting ready for tomorrow. Anyways I'm going to bed now. Goodnight everyone and see you on the losers bench!

This is supposed to be an exciting time of my life, I just got my own place Friday and I'm still in the process of moving in and then my gastric sleeve gastrectomy is set for tomorrow and so I'm under a lot of stress as it is. I was confident about the surgery yesterday and was still confident today until my grandpa called me this morning and told me that his friend had died from having weight loss surgery and that I should listen to him and not get it or at least postpone it. Now his friend already had the surgery a while back and lost a lot of weight but he died two days ago. My grandpa claims it's from the weight loss surgery but I'm not sure he knows that for sure. I mean the guy could've had preexisting medical problems, he was in his early 50's as far as I'm concerned he could've died from anything. Am I scared? No. Do I know there's a possibility that I could die? Yes. Am I afraid of dying? No. I talked to a nurse who had a gastric bypass and she reassured me that my surgeon has yet to lose a patient. So I still want the surgery but now it's like I have no joy about it anymore, just opposition from my family and stress. My grandpa also said that if I get sick or need to go to the hospital or anything not to call him for help. I just don't get it. Then my mom keeps playing games with me. I asked her weeks ago if she would take me to get the surgery and she said she would and to just remind her and keep reminding her so that I don't just spring it up on her at the very last minute and to constantly remind her all the way up until the surgery. Well I've been doing that and then she gets mad and says that I keep asking her the same questions too much. She has started playing games saying she's not going to take me after all. I know she isn't just saying that, she has flaked out on me before. So now it looks like I'm taking the bus tomorrow. I don't know how I will get home but I'll worry about it when it's time to leave the hospital. I'm just so sad that complete strangers like everyone here at bariatricpal, the guy at the grocery store, even the guy at GNC have been so supportive and helpful but I just can't get that from my family.

To be honest I feel numb about my surgery right about now, there's not much excitement anymore, pretty much like okay lets do this and get it over with. On the other hand part of me is like meh I'm not ready because I don't know how to prepare pureed foods and if I -have- to prepare them. I'm stressed out. Too many things going on at once and while the pre-op liquid diet gave me an awesome 24 pound weight loss I can't be excited or focus solely on this surgery because I just moved into my own place and still need so much stuff so I'm spread thin and I need a bunch of new furniture but I don't think I'll be able to lift things for a while. I'm overwhelmed and it sucks. I've become absent minded and started making poor choices in terms of financial priorities. I can't think straight and common sense has not been my best friend lately. Not sure if it's because of stress or that I haven't had a good meal in a while now. I have somehow survived this pre-op liquid diet, I don't know how but I did. I hung in there and been following the directions precisely although today I went overboard on apple juice and had 5 glasses of it but only one bowl of broth and that's all I've had all day so maybe that's not so bad. Maybe it is because I'm a diabetic I don't know. Yeah...So one more day and it won't be spent resting. It'll be spent running around like a chicken with my head cut off. I have to get my hair done so I won't look like a wild lion tomorrow, my therapist wants to see me one more time before my surgery so I have to see her because it might be the last time since she's being transferred somewhere else. I have to go by my apartment and pick up my overnight bag for my hospital stay and then I have to go grocery shopping for when I come out of the hospital, then last but not least visit my grandma in the hospital and then call everyone in my family just in case it's the last time I'll ever speak to them but I'm not worried in the least about that. I don't think I will die. This body has been through a lot but it's strong. Everything wrong with it is just weight related but that's about to change. I'm hoping two months from now I will be in a position where I can actually appreciate the surgery and the sleeve, appreciate my new apartment and the things I have and I know that I should appreciate them now but I can't. I just feel too anxious and overwhelmed.

I wish you a safe and successful surgery and a painless and speedy recovery.

Well I finally started moving in. Turns out the lady was pretty old (96 years old) and she died because of old age. I was told she was a nice sweet lady. My place is quiet and has a nice vibe to it so I'm not bugged out about it anymore.

I know what you're going through. Day 4 was the hardest in my opinion. By day 4 I developed an appetite for metal spoons and started thinking about eating my own fingers ( they remind me of sausage maybe?) because I was so hungry. Just hang in there and try not to cheat and I know its easier said than done but your battle starts now. You will even doubt having the surgery and mourn food but it's just passing thoughts that like to attack you while you're hungry or craving food. Don't let yourself become fooled by those thoughts. I kid you not I was weighing 345 pounds last week and now I check the scales on day 7 of my liquid diet and I weigh 327 lbs! So now I'm thinking all this suffering is paying off. The liquid diet will shrink your liver which needs to happen before your surgery and will be a good launch pad for the transition into your new lifestyle.

Good luck and may you have a safe and successful surgery and painless and speedy recovery.

Thank you all for your words of encouragement and advice. I'm still hanging in there determined to follow this liquid diet and not let the temptations of food deter me from getting WLS. @@Dub Yep I can have Healthwise oatmeal until Wednesday then I have to stop it 7 days before my surgery. I will definitely give the flavored Water a try. Thanks! @@Lori222 Good luck with your surgery. Yeah the ups and downs are real and I'm glad I'm not the only one having doubts about the surgery. @@SkinnyDown Omg you sound so much like me. I always had to hide what I eat and was ashamed to eat in front of people. I remember going to Mc Donald's and ordering two double quarter pounders with cheese or going to Chick-Fil-A and ordering three sandwiches and just not to sound like a pig I would be like "Oh she wants one without pickles" but all that food was just for me. Food addiction is real and I've been also talking to my therapist about it. I've been trying to channel my addictive behavior into something more positive. Well I don't know if its positive but lately its been more along the lines of online window shopping and watching beauty tutorials on youtube. I really want to channel the addictive behavior into something even better like exercising and getting in shape. @@catwoman7 That's why I'm really looking forward to the surgery. Get rid of this hunger for all things unhealthy and control how much I eat. Really looking forward to that diminishing.

It's only day 4 and I'm trying my hardest to hang in there. I remember someone else posting about head hunger and I tried to give him encouragement saying what I would do if I was in his shoes but I realize its waaaay more complicated than that. I get it now, I understand man. I'm not used to being long term hungry whatsoever and my mind and my body cannot stand this feeling. I have tried to cheat it, I eat several packets of my oatmeal and broth at a time, I've been sleeping a lot more to ignore it and keep myself busy. I don't think it's mental, I feel my tummy actually yearning for food. I try to drink more fluids but I don't crave liquid at all (which is odd because I'm a soda addict and was chugging up to 8 cans or more a day ) I have to force myself to drink a single bottle of Water in a day. I know this is not good because when I have the surgery I'll need to try to get down 64oz of water daily. I've even started to crave the metal spoon I eat my oatmeal with and got an appetite for it, I've started thinking about eating my own fingers (which I won't but been chewing on them lol) but this is crazy! I've been second guessing whether or not I'm ready for this surgery, thinking about how "happy" and fulfilled food made me feel and all the pleasure I take in eating. I know I need to have this surgery, I have too many problems not to. My life will not get any better if I don't. I really want a better quality of life which is why I want to do this. I'm sure this is only the first battle I just hope I can hang.

Thanks to everyone who replied to this thread! Your responses were all very helpful and I'm glad I won't need as much help as I initially thought. I guess I just need to prepare my liquid "meals" and what not ahead of time if I can and make sure everything I need is all within reach. I'll need to arrange for someone to drop me off and pick me up from the hospital and have someone call me twice day to check on me 2-3 days after surgery and as long as I don't need anything heavy to be lifted I should be good to go.It's going to be hectic before surgery, I will be moving into a new apartment April 4 same day as my pre-op appointment and then two days after that will be the day of my surgery. Not to mention I need to do some shopping for for my surgery and my new place around that time. I could really use a clone.

Hi so the person I was making arrangements with to help me right after the surgery won't be able to as it turns out. I'm afraid that I will have no family members or friends that would be able to. So I am wondering just how much help does one require after the WLS? How long will it take until you can drive after surgery? Can you drive yourself home from the hospital? (I know its probably a dumb question but I'm serious.) Or do you have to have someone take you home from the hospital and if so do you need extra care and assistance getting into the car and getting out and walking to your home? Would a cab or something like Uber be okay to pick you up from the hospital? When you're home do you need someone to fix your meals for you? Help you with medications? Assist you when you get up and have to walk around and such? Do you need someone to check on you? If so how often? How long will it be before you can do something like go grocery shopping? What are other things you would need help with?

Congratulations! I know it wasn't easy but you fought hard for this and now your goal is within reach. I hope they book your surgery soon.

Hello welcome to bariatricpal! Everyone's experiences are a little different I think but there might be someone with a similar insurance who could tell you their experience. My first consultation, I went to the surgeon's office, he evaluated me and recommended the type of surgery he thought would be best for me which happened to be the laparoscopic gastric sleeve. He told me what it entailed (cutting my stomach and making it smaller) and of things I could expect, what I couldn't eat anymore and the type of lifestyle I would have to adapt to after the surgery. He also told me I would have to see a bunch of specialists that my insurance covered, an endocrinologist, gastroentrologist, psychiatrist, cardiologist, respiratory doctor and nutritionist. I had to be cleared by all these people in order to be approved for the surgery and it took roughly 6 months to complete this process. Then he'd have to submit all that information to the insurance company to get it approved. He also told me I had to go on a liquid diet 2 weeks prior to surgery and had to pay $300 out of pocket for the program fee and food they were to give me during that time period. Some people have to go on a 6 month pre-op diet but I didn't have to. Anyways I wish you the best with your consultation and hope everything goes well.

I don't blame you for being afraid, but just hang in there and know you're life is about to change tomorrow and the steps you'll take thereafter you will no longer be a prisoner trapped inside your own body. You've come this far for a reason you can do this. Heck I commend you for sticking to the liquid diet for 3 weeks you've won the first battle, you went to all your appointments saw your specialists and did everything required of you and that was not easy. I wish you a successful surgery and a painless and speedy recovery.

Okay so I might be getting a place of my own this week. Since 2009 I've dreamed of moving to this particular place. I used to stay there with an ex-boyfriend at one point and always wanted to live there on my own but there were all sorts of obstacles that prevented me from getting the gall to apply, I was afraid I wouldn't meet all the requirements but I prayed really hard and worked really hard over the past year to do whatever I can to qualify for this place. I don't want to live anywhere else. I put all my eggs in one basket pretty much but that's how badly I wanted to live there lol. Anyways so its pending a final approval and I informed the property manger that I would be having surgery soon so I would like to know when I would be able to move in and that's when she told me this very upcoming week if everything goes fine however, someone died in the place. An old lady who supposedly died from old age and I was told that I need to sign a waiver saying that I was informed. I don't know if I believe in ghosts or what not really. Part of me does especially when alone, part of me doesn't. I sometimes suffer from sleep paralysis, where my eyes are open and I can't move and sometimes hallucinate creepy things. I just don't know if I should move into this place now knowing someone died. To be honest I wish the property manager never told me. Anyways would you do it?

I don't feel ready either to be honest and my surgery is on April 6 but I plan to try to get ready or do whatever I can to put my mind at ease such as devour as much information from my pre op packet and from this website, watching videos on youtube and write out a plan, things that are within my control around the time of the surgery and after. I don't know if it will help you or not but maybe you can come up with a plan for yourself, a checklist of things you need to do and learn before the surgery things you need to do after the surgery, all the stuff you need to get etc. I wish you luck and hope everything works out.

I don't know what is wrong with me but as the surgery looms closer I can't sleep at night. So anxious and excited. Keep thinking about my future, I've never been so optimistic and filled with so much hope. So many good things happening at once. First and foremost I'm thankful to God, without him with the way things were going last year I would be dead by now for sure. I was on the verge of being homeless, constantly sick and being diagnosed with more health problems but now look at me, I could possibly get my own place this week, this week is also when my weight loss journey kicks off. I hope I can do this upcoming liquid diet Wednesday. 2 weeks of no solid foods just liquid, then bam! Surgery time then more liquids. I know it won't be easy. I can't even stand the feeling of being hungry, it drives me absolutely crazy and makes me really grouchy and mean, but just to think a year from now I could very well be half my size! I think about this lifestyle I want, I want to be healthy. Having a place of my own will give me that advantage. I won't have to look at a fridge full of tempting food that would throw me off course, don't have to choose foods I don't even want when grocery shopping because I have to compromise and share the grocery bill with other people. I can eat whenever I want also and I no longer have to be ashamed when I eat around people because whatever I'll be eating would be healthy and within the parameters of my required diet and my sleeve would restrict my portions. I would like to get a little dog to take on walks, and actually utilize the gym in the apartment building I'm moving into or go to a regular gym or both. I want an active lifestyle, try things I can't do now like maybe go hiking even though nature and I don't necessarily get along, (I'm scared of insects, snakes and mountain lions) but I'll give it a try. I also used to love bike riding (until I rode off a curb one day and broke the bike in half), I want to try indoor rock climbing, maybe join a dance class -just all kinds of things I can't even think about now because I'm so big and out of shape, but maybe even do the little things like going to the beach and walking across the sand without sinking ankle deep each step. I want to spend the next two to three years years getting to know myself and becoming my true self. Who I am right now is not really me because my life has just been so restricted because of my weight and other issues I've had to overcome. I've been through hell and now things are changing for the better and I just want to seize the opportunity to live life to the fullest and function like a well adjusted healthy human being for once. The scary thing is I haven't confronted all my demons yet, namely the ones that have triggered my binge eating and overeating all these years and the one that equates a belly full of big greasy double cheeseburgers and soda with a loving hug from my mother who rejected me. But you know what? I'm putting on my fighting gloves and when my poor tummy roars from thinking I'm punishing it by feeding it only liquids I'm going to arm myself with self-help books and prayer and I'm going to confront this motherfucking demon head on and defeat it because that's all I can do. I have my mind set -I'm going to have this surgery April 6 and its going to hurt a little bit, -maybe a lot, but as they say, anything worth having is worth fighting for. I'm spending the next few days learning all I can about this surgery, about my diet and getting in tune and mentally preparing myself -things I probably should've been doing all along but I just never thought this surgery was actually going to happen even though I've went through most of the process. I've had all these people I'm related to whom I expected to be my cheerleaders say nothing but negative and discouraging things to me about how I won't be able to do this. All I really got egging me on is myself and some of the nice people from bariatricpal. Some of these people have experienced the same things and things I haven't experienced yet but will go through. I can learn a lot from them.

Hi welcome to bariatricpal. Good luck with your journey!

I was about 6 years old engaged in a school activity, I think the high jump when a kid poked me in the stomach and called me chubby. Shortly afterward it was my turn to do the high jump and I couldn't do it, just knocked the bar over. There were several other instances in my child hood where me being fat definitely got hammered in my brain such as my family making fun of my weight throughout, or the time when I was 10 years old in a bounce house and made it tip over with the other kids inside.