blackfalls

Wow, Heather, that's a kick in the pants from other posters if I ever saw one!
But I think it's good for us pre-oppers to have other well-travelled sleevers keep us in line. I think that's what will help make us successful down the road.
I have too many enablers in my life already, it's good that I won't find that here.

Thanks everyone for the words of advice-kick in the pants or not..harsh or not...whatever..that doesnt matter to me.. What matters is that i found support in a small group of people who were willing to honestly weigh in on a question...that helps.
I did go ahead and have a pickle..did i like it? Not really...Did it help to take a bite and chew? YEP. Did i feel guilty knowing it was still a cheat regardless..Yep. Will i do it again? No..is the answer i want to give but i cant make a promise because im human and its hard being 100 percent.. BUT ... next time i will attempt to find a different coping method when i feel very tempted.
Thanks for your help AND ditto to what Lauren said... chewing and spitting out food is begging for an eating disorder..trust me..i have a lot of experience with eating disorders..it explains half the reason why i am fat today.