Jennj84

I just joined this forum because I was so excited today when I finally got my date for surgery which will be Friday April 13.
My top weight was 509.8 and I am down to about 440 now.. I had been closer to getting into the 300's last year but when they increased my insulin, the pounds followed me back! I am ready to get healthy!
I have type II diabetes, lymphedema, COPD, arthritis, sleep apnea and of course I am super morbidly obese. This will all be changing soon, one pound at a time!

I have lost a total of 150 lbs and because I am 6'0 tall, very large boned, and a woman I am still discriminated against. I've even been asked if I have giantism (now that is painful) I don't have any features which point to giantism, I am beautiful only large boned. In the beginning it was my weight (360lbs before surgery) combined with my height that scared folks. . . now i'm slimmer (size 14/16) but still tall. . . I can't do anything about that though. . .but it still hurts. . . totally understand. . . my mom used to tell me "oh honey, remember what you let out, the shorter ones have to take in". . .my mom has some good ones! hahahah. . .

Maybe because I am still obese, but I can't realy relate to judging other heavy people. I appreciate somebody admitting it, because I notice alot of posts that sort of brush by the issue but certainly imply "disgust" with people who are still obese.
I personally feel that we can be our own worst enemies. I wonder if some of the self loathing that many obese people have get shifted to others as they lose their weight? i don't know if that is the case or not, but I find that MOST thin people accept obese people and I hope once I am "formerly fat" that I don't become judgemental. (You know, how ex-smokers are often pretty obnoxious about smoking, for example)
As to the original post, I kinda think that the experience for women (5'5" in my case) being overweight doesn't equate to people being intimidated. I think it more equates more to being ignored/and considered very unattractive. For women, looks is a big part of our identity in this culture, and at least in my corner of the world, being thin is critical to those "looks", so being so outside the range of normal kinda takes away some of your participation in being considered a "woman". I am not really finding the right words, but I feel that obesity sometimes makes women appear as invisible, non-sexual beings to the outside world.
I say all that, but I also believe that the obese person contributes to this by behaving in a low confidence/ I am trying to be invisible way. I am a naturally outgoing person, and as I get thinner I notice myself engaging in a lot more pleasantries with complete strangers, but i think that is mostly because MY attitude is changing, I am feeling better physically and just feel more comfortable in my own skin. I was not embarrased to be seen when I was 300+ pounds, but I was physically uncomfortable and felt like an overstuffed sausage kinda thing and I am sure that uncomfortableness was visibible. That attitude shift shows up to the outside world, and i think people respond to that unconscious message.