K I S S

[GreenTealael 24,852]

Click bait!!! (Not really) This post is about simplification.

I'm almost a year post op and the further out I get, the more I refine what I'm doing.

(I feel like at this point I should be searching for a sugar daddy instead of sugar content but that's another post...)

How have you ordered your life to make the entire process easier - for loss and maintenance phases? Are you still struggling to find balance? Prefer complexity to simplicity?

Eventually I want it to be so easy and effortless that I just don't think about it anymore. You know, lifestyle.

Drop some tips below that are really working for you!

[Healthy_life 1,437]

3 hours ago, GreenTealael said:

Click bait!!! (Not really) This post is about simplification.

I'm almost a year post op and the further out I get, the more I refine what I'm doing.

(I feel like at this point I should be searching for a sugar daddy instead of sugar content but that's another post...)

How have you ordered your life to make the entire process easier - for loss and maintenance phases? Are you still struggling to find balance? Prefer complexity to simplicity?

Eventually I want it to be so easy and effortless that I just don't think about it anymore. You know, lifestyle.

Drop some tips below that are really working for you!

I want to hear tips from people that maintain effortlessly. I thought maintaining would be easier.

The transition from weight loss into maintenance was interesting. It was hard to let go of weight loss phase after living that way for so long. Just took time to adjust.

How have you ordered your life to make the entire process easier - for loss and maintenance phases?

Four years out. Living healthy comes naturally. Grocery shopping and cooking is a breeze. Gym is my stress relief. Instead of weight loss goals I have fitness goals. I live life and indulge once in a while. When I gain, I go back to basics. I have chased the same ten pounds up and down the scale. (with the exception of my third year)

Are you still struggling to find balance?

I am settling into the fact my weight bounces around. I know how easy it is for me to gain. I experienced being stuck at a sixteen pound gain in my third year. Basics stopped working ( I have no idea why) Fourth year basics are now working well. I dropped back into my maintaining zone.

Prefer complexity to simplicity?

I prefer to do both

I take breaks. I don't log and I workout less. Right now my goals are distance running driven. To stay healthy I log food and train.

[summerset 5,261]

13 hours ago, GreenTealael said:

Eventually I want it to be so easy and effortless that I just don't think about it anymore.

I'm not really sure how to interpret the words I made bold in the quote. Do you want to be maintenance as "natural" as possible or are you looking for ways to view "being strict" as a normal part of everyday life? If it's the later you can save your time and stop reading here.

---

I personally think to maintain effortlessly (though I think "effortlessly" means something different for different people) you have to learn to ride certain dragons instead of trying to avoid them.

You also have to find a lifestyle you can maintain without much hassle. You, not your neighbor, your colleague, Aunt Ruthie or the Instagram ab-girl that posts about a dozen selfies and food pics per hour so giving tips feels always a bit weird to me.

You also need to be (emotionally) flexible enough to suit your needs in different situations, e. g. ideally you respond to phases of lower physical activity with less appetite, e. g. you usually ride your bike to work but during a few weeks in winter it would be too dangerous because of slippery roads and you go by train or car during these weeks. Are you willing to accept a temporary slight weight gain or do you want to seriously interfere with your eating habits and/or up your non-NEAT exercise?

Learn to let go of the "tracking". How many thin people do you know in your life who give a flying f*ck about "tracking"? The only people I know who care about tracking calories and burnt calories are people who try to lose weight. You aren't. You want to maintain the status quo.

Ask yourself who you want to be. "The WLS patient"? "The formerly obese person?", "The person who doesn't want to be obsessed with this stuff anymore"?, "The health and exercise nut who gets a nervous breakdown every time something interferes with her food or training schedule"? And then act on it.

[Healthy_life 1,437]

We all have our own goals with weight loss and how we work to maintain. Wow, Pretty judgmental about health and exercise nuts *laughing*

Edited October 1, 2018 by skinnylife

[FluffyChix 17,409]

8 hours ago, summerset said:

I'm not really sure how to interpret the words I made bold in the quote. Do you want to be maintenance as "natural" as possible or are you looking for ways to view "being strict" as a normal part of everyday life? If it's the later you can save your time and stop reading here.

---

I personally think to maintain effortlessly (though I think "effortlessly" means something different for different people) you have to learn to ride certain dragons instead of trying to avoid them.

You also have to find a lifestyle you can maintain without much hassle. You, not your neighbor, your colleague, Aunt Ruthie or the Instagram ab-girl that posts about a dozen selfies and food pics per hour so giving tips feels always a bit weird to me.

You also need to be (emotionally) flexible enough to suit your needs in different situations, e. g. ideally you respond to phases of lower physical activity with less appetite, e. g. you usually ride your bike to work but during a few weeks in winter it would be too dangerous because of slippery roads and you go by train or car during these weeks. Are you willing to accept a temporary slight weight gain or do you want to seriously interfere with your eating habits and/or up your non-NEAT exercise?

Learn to let go of the "tracking". How many thin people do you know in your life who give a flying f*ck about "tracking"? The only people I know who care about tracking calories and burnt calories are people who try to lose weight. You aren't. You want to maintain the status quo.

Ask yourself who you want to be. "The WLS patient"? "The formerly obese person?", "The person who doesn't want to be obsessed with this stuff anymore"?, "The health and exercise nut who gets a nervous breakdown every time something interferes with her food or training schedule"? And then act on it.

I actually envy people who manage to be successful long-term without focusing on diet and exercise. I think that formerly MO peeps who effortlessly reach goal and maintain past the 18mo-5year mark without regain are as rare as hens teeth, chimera, and unicorns--maybe even as likely in finding them as seeing confetti and rainbows flying out of my keester too.

Why? Cuz I don't just think or say this--the science and research supports this--that genetically skinny/metabolically blessed people operate with a whole different set of road rules that govern their normal weights than those who are either genetically challenged, or metabolically injured. You can't apply one set of rules and see success in the other population. It's magical thinking. You can wish in one and spit in the other. Guess which one you will have?

Science shows that once MO/indeed, once overweight...we metabolically set our bodies up for bigger and bigger shifts in the space/time/fat continuum that requires we become even more strict on diet/exercise/lifestyle choices. So yeah...there's that.

I'm pretty sure, for the rest of my MO life (btw, even though I will be at normal weight in about 12lbs, I will ALWAYS be a metabolically MO peep. The End. Don't believe me? Just run tests on my cells/metabolism/etc.

[Sleeved36 356]

I am still in the losing phase. Haven't dealt with maintenance yet, but it sounds nice since that means you have met goal!

Great post. I am definitely interested in how everyone gets to thier own version of balance. I do not want to track obsessively for the rest of my life.

Sometimes when people describe the things they do it starts to sound like disordered eating, not new healthy habits.

I totally relate to the last thing the Summerset said.

In social settings, I do not want to be known as "formerly fat". My identity is much more than that.

What I can and can not eat should not dominate the conversation everytime I am out with friends. Eventually I won't have any.

I do not want to miss events or fun things in life bc I can't mess up my gym routine.

But none of that means I do not want to have a reasonable, healthy life of moderation.

[Healthy_life 1,437]

3 minutes ago, Sleeved36 said:

I am still in the losing phase. Haven't dealt with maintenance yet, but it sounds nice since that means you have met goal!

Great post. I am definitely interested in how everyone gets to thier own version of balance. I do not want to track obsessively for the rest of my life.

Sometimes when people describe the things they do it starts to sound like disordered eating, not new healthy habits.

I totally relate to the last thing the Summerset said.

In social settings, I do not want to be known as "formerly fat". My identity is much more than that.

What I can and can not eat should not dominate the conversation everytime I am out with friends. Eventually I won't have any.

I do not want to miss events or fun things in life bc I can't mess up my gym routine.

But none of that means I do not want to have a reasonable, healthy life of moderation.

9 hours ago, summerset said:

"The health and exercise nut who gets a nervous breakdown every time something interferes with her food or training schedule"?

I don't believe that people choose an eating disorder as a way of maintaining.

In defense of people that are athletic. Not sure why you would think that going to the gym means you miss out on things. The gym is also a ballance. Most schedule events and skip days.

[GreenTealael 24,852]

Interesting conversation everyone! More please!

[Sleeved36 356]

7 hours ago, skinnylife said:

I don't believe that people choose an eating disorder as a way of maintaining.

In defense of people that are athletic. Not sure why you would think that going to the gym means you miss out on things. The gym is also a ballance. Most schedule events and skip days.

Oh, no! Please don't hear me wrong. I was not criticizing you.

I LOVE my workouts and they are totally essential for both losing and maintaining. I am NOT criticizing gym goers.

We all know people who go a little extreme with both diet and exercise and I don't want that to be me.

We all have a friend or coworker that doesn't stop talking about every meal or thier gym routine. I don't want that to be me.

Worrying about every calorie and obsessing about every workout isn't really healthy in the long run.

[FluffyChix 17,409]

9 hours ago, Sleeved36 said:

Oh, no! Please don't hear me wrong. I was not criticizing you.

I LOVE my workouts and they are totally essential for both losing and maintaining. I am NOT criticizing gym goers.

We all know people who go a little extreme with both diet and exercise and I don't want that to be me.

We all have a friend or coworker that doesn't stop talking about every meal or thier gym routine. I don't want that to be me.

Worrying about every calorie and obsessing about every workout isn't really healthy in the long run.

With all due respect, you are making a judgement.

"We all know people who go a little extreme with both diet and exercise and I don't want that to be me." That's YOUR opinion. But what if they are perfectly satisfied and living a happy balanced life TO THEM? Just because it would make your life uncomfortable does not mean your way is the right way and their way is wrong. There are many paths to the same truth.

"We all have a friend or coworker that doesn't stop talking about every meal or their gym routine..." Really? I think that also sounds like a judgement and maybe you are sensitive to that so it registers with you.

"Worrying about every calorie or obsessing about every workout isn't really healthy in the long run." Of course it isn't. But again, that's your perspective. ARE they truly worrying about every last morsel? Maybe they track things more detailed than you. Maybe they meal plan. But obsessing? How are you qualified to make that mental health assessment. I think you are judging.

Just because you are different doesn't make you right and them wrong. And this is what I object to about the left turn this thread went in. I'm so absolutely tired of people not just living and letting people live. I'm so sick of being hammered and shamed if my way is different. In RL and online. What makes you and authority? What makes Summerset?

And even more...how does anyone who lacked the basic skills in understanding dietary moderation PRE-surgery, just "magically" wake up the next day after surgery and suddenly develop those abilities inately for the rest of their lives? LOL. I call BS and shenanigans. Why? Cuz stomachs heal and restriction loosens. You can eat more. You can eat bad foods. You start groovin on living life and you add back alcohol. And it's a recipe for "magic moderation regain." On this board right now, there are 2 such posts about the subject. Over the last 18months I've seen 100s of these threads.

I'm gonna place my bet on @skinnylife @BigViffer @Biddy zz and @Diana in Philly those types of people with focus and plans that they will continue to live excellent, rewarding lives of health, happiness and normal weight.

[GreenTealael 24,852]

Question:

Anyone participating long term with intense / strict / detailed / complex routines feel stressed about them? Or are happy with the structures they provide?

Vice Versa for simplified/ relaxed/looser lifestyles? Constant anxiety over regain? Or not worried because you have it at a nice ebb and flow?

I didnt want this to be a this vs that thread, I wanted to know what was working or wasnt working (from real experience not conjecture)

[Sleeved36 356]

Did I miss something?

I thought this thread was about how to achieve balance in the maintenance phase? And how we order our lives.

I am allowed to speak about how I want to order my life.

Calm down. I thought the main person who liked to start arguments left this site.

[GreenTealael 24,852]

1 hour ago, Sleeved36 said:

Did I miss something?

I thought this thread was about how to achieve balance in the maintenance phase? And how we order our lives.

I am allowed to speak about how I want to order my life.

Calm down. I thought the main person who liked to start arguments left this site.

Lol

It can be about the losing and maintenance phases.

Absolutely everyone is welcome to answer especially from their own perspective. No matter how divergent their path is. That's really what im looking for, alot of personal views on what people are really doing.

Im totally trying to avoid drama at this point, stress raises cortisol levels and cortisol blocks fat burning 😂😂😂😂😂

I just want to find the most information I can and maybe leave record of it on the site for others. I truly value the exchange of information this site provides.

[GreenTealael 24,852]

On 9/30/2018 at 4:41 PM, skinnylife said:

I want to hear tips from people that maintain effortlessly. I thought maintaining would be easier.

The transition from weight loss into maintenance was interesting. It was hard to let go of weight loss phase after living that way for so long. Just took time to adjust.

How have you ordered your life to make the entire process easier - for loss and maintenance phases?

Four years out. Living healthy comes naturally. Grocery shopping and cooking is a breeze. Gym is my stress relief. Instead of weight loss goals I have fitness goals. I live life and indulge once in a while. When I gain, I go back to basics. I have chased the same ten pounds up and down the scale. (with the exception of my third year)

Are you still struggling to find balance?

I am settling into the fact my weight bounces around. I know how easy it is for me to gain. I experienced being stuck at a sixteen pound gain in my third year. Basics stopped working ( I have no idea why) Fourth year basics are now working well. I dropped back into my maintaining zone.

Prefer complexity to simplicity?

I prefer to do both

I take breaks. I don't log and I workout less. Right now my goals are distance running driven. To stay healthy I log food and train.

Do you track meal regularly with an app or by sight? Do you set yearly goals? Do you work out more now compared to the first year?

Thanks!!

[summerset 5,261]

On 1.10.2018 at 6:47 PM, FluffyChix said:

I actually envy people who manage to be successful long-term without focusing on diet and exercise.

Then why not try to do what they do? Watch them, learn from them, ask questions. However, it might (or might not) take a leap of faith to let go of old boundaries.

Quote

I think that formerly MO peeps who effortlessly reach goal and maintain past the 18mo-5year mark without regain are as rare as hens teeth, chimera, and unicorns

What do you mean by "effortlessly" exactly? I think that people have a different understanding of that word and it's also quite different what people view as "an effort".