I'm so thankful for having this app and my Friday night Bariatric surgery classes. If I didn't have these places to vent I'd go nuts!!

My husband isn't supportive of my choice to have surgery and my parents aren't either. I'm pretty much alone in my journey. I've decided not to tell them my surgery day is a week from today. I'm supper excited about it, but my husband trying to convince me not to do it just brings me down. We always end up in a fight and this time he said he doesn't want me to EVER mention the surgery again! Total ass, but whatever. He doesn't know what it is to struggle with weight your entire life!! I have 3 kids and I'm trying my best so that they won't have to go through what I went through!

Ok feeling a little better. :}

Recovering from iggychic's comments?! Yes! :}

No' date=' my surgery is on Wednesday... But thank you sooo much, I truly appreciate your good thoughts. [/quote']

LMAO For gads sake really?

I'm truly sorry you have such a terrible family life. Honestly, to think it's that bad makes me feel bad for you, your husband, your parents and your kids. I hope that as time goes on you can find a relationship that is more supportive of you and your choices so that you can set a great example for your children. I assumed your spouse was living with you and as such keeping such a huge secret from him would be unfair. After all anyone would worry when mom/wife does not return from a doctor's appt for a few days etc.

I had complications. My perspective is hindsight that is guided by what I went through. Many people do have complications and to not have the support of those around you when this happens sucks. Hell it sucks just with a normal recovery. Good luck. I hope all works out in the end for everyone!

You have to do what's right for you. This was not a spur of the moment decision, you worked long and hard to get to this point.

Your children deserve a healthy happy mom! Best of luck (and a few prayers!)

LMAO For gads sake really?

I'm truly sorry you have such a terrible family life. Honestly' date=' to think it's that bad makes me feel bad for you, your husband, your parents and your kids. I hope that as time goes on you can find a relationship that is more supportive of you and your choices so that you can set a great example for your children. I assumed your spouse was living with you and as such keeping such a huge secret from him would be unfair. After all anyone would worry when mom/wife does not return from a doctor's appt for a few days etc.

I had complications. My perspective is hindsight that is guided by what I went through. Many people do have complications and to not have the support of those around you when this happens sucks. Hell it sucks just with a normal recovery. Good luck. I hope all works out in the end for everyone![/quote']

You sound like a very unhappy person. I'm very sorry you had a horrible experience with your surgery.. I truly am. I wish that on no one.

Although I do not have the support of my husband, I feel like I'm in good spirits. I'm excited and looking forward to getting my surgery done.

I don't think I have a "terrible" family life... Just small obstacles I have to overcome. I am proud of the person I am and I think I set great examples for my children. Not telling my husband about the surgery because that's what HE requested, doesn't define me, my family, my life... So thank you sooo much, but you opinion on my life is not needed.

Why is your husband so against the surgery? Does he not think you need wls? I was 272 and sleeved 10/23/12 & down to 236! Loving my sleeve

Iggychic you obviously don't know my life story or the people involved. I respect your opinion, but I wasn't asking for it. I just needed to vent. My husband can be a real a*****e sometimes and I just rather save myself the trouble of having to hear his **** the day of surgery. You must have an amazing, super supportive husband and that's great... I don't.

Well I decided not to tell my fiance about the surgery cuz i know he'll blow a gasket. Not because he doesn't want me to get healthy or look good, but because of my safety and well being. I am having my surgery in Mexico and he can't come with me. My children know and they are worried as well but respect my decision. You are a grown woman and entitled to make your own decisions. He knows about the surgery so that good enough. Don't let other people and their opinions upset you.

Why is your husband so against the surgery? Does he not think you need wls? I was 272 and sleeved 10/23/12 & down to 236! Loving my sleeve

Can't wait to be in your shoes!

My husband just wants me to do it the "natural" way... Good old fashion diet and exercise. This man was raised vegetarian and has never had an issue with weight. :/

connie3 Im in tears right now causes I totally understand. There are sometimes in life when the people u care about can hold u back. Please keep pushing forward and have faith.Keep me posted on your surgery so I can pray for u my sister.

connie3 Im in tears right now causes I totally understand. There are sometimes in life when the people u care about can hold u back. Please keep pushing forward and have faith.Keep me posted on your surgery so I can pray for u my sister.

Prayers and well wishes are very much welcomed!! Thank you so much!! I really appreciate your support. I know I can't be the only one going through this and that's why I come on here. And hopefully I can support others, especially those that are in my similar situation.

Well I decided not to tell my fiance about the surgery cuz i know he'll blow a gasket. Not because he doesn't want me to get healthy or look good' date=' but because of my safety and well being. I am having my surgery in Mexico and he can't come with me. My children know and they are worried as well but respect my decision. You are a grown woman and entitled to make your own decisions. He knows about the surgery so that good enough. Don't let other people and their opinions upset you.[/quote']

I'm going to Mexico as well. My hubby is skeptical as is my mom. My dad and I agreed it is a topic we won't discuss with each other. It is what it is.

Amanda Rae

What if you die? Or have complications from the surgery? Sheesh this is no way to go into this at all. If you care for your family at all you should tell them you are going in for a life threatening surgery for gads sake! If they don't support you now' date=' why on earth would they if you do this?[/quote']

In a perfect world we'd have much support, instant insurance approval, and -0- complications/fatalities. Instead we have reality. She is making the decision she feels is best for her health and handling it the way she must think is best for her peace of mind. It's a crappy situation but its not our place to judge. We don't know how each other's shoes fit or what their walk is like. The next thing to do is be supportive or perhaps silent?

Amanda Rae

In a perfect world we'd have much support, instant insurance approval, and -0- complications/fatalities. Instead we have reality. She is making the decision she feels is best for her health and handling it the way she must think is best for her peace of mind. It's a crappy situation but its not our place to judge. We don't know how each other's shoes fit or what their walk is like. The next thing to do is be supportive or perhaps silent?

Amanda Rae

Well said.

Well said.

Thank you.

Amanda Rae

I think you should disregard the nuttier comments and focus on the helpful ones, it is possible that your husband and parents are just scared for the surgical risks or they can't imagine what you would be like if you become thin and healthy. You could try educating them with facts about the operation or even taking them to your doctor for a talk. If it is the second reason, well it is your body and your life and your future is not theirs to decide. Good luck.

My husband doesn't want me to have the surgery either but knows that when I put my mind to something, I'm committed! Both my mom and grandma will be my support system along w a few friends that have been sleeved and my VST family! I love this website! I wish you well Wednesday with your surgery! I'm getting sleeve Dec. 20!!

Everyone's story is different. Iggychic went through hell and unfortunately it was removed from the forum so newer posters cannot read it, but she was just being blunt, which a lot of people cannot take. I grew up with no support whatsoever on anything, so in adult life, it made me not care about anyones opinion about anything I did. I feel everyone is entitled to the same. You do what you have to to get through. But...

...going through surgery is a risky business and if there are complications, it would be nice to have a support group to lean on. Best of luck to all who have to go it alone.