Beausie Bunny

brightfaith, I am calling my therapist this afternoon. I just need help in some way. I also have made an appointment with my psychiatrist to talk to him about medication changes. I feel like one is working and one is not, so a change may be needed. Thank you for your response. I just feel alone.

I am a year out from surgery tomorrow. I had RNY 11/07/16. I lost 155 lbs. Now I have gained back 15. I'm stuck because I suffer from Major Depressive Disorder and Generalized Anxiety. I go to therapy weekly and group every other week. I also am on medication for my mental illness. All I want to do is eat. I don't drink soda or alcohol. I get around 50-60 grams of protein a day. The rest is sugar and carbs. I feel so hopeless and like I've let everyone down. I can eat a whole box of cookies in an evening. I try to drink calorie-free things. I do well for a couple days and just do soft foods and track my calories and get protein, then I get depressed and overeat. I don't want people getting onto me but I'm getting suicidal due to this problem. I can't get big again. I'd rather die. I have an appointment for a one year checkup later this month and I'm so frustrated and depressed that I feel worthless. Has anyone experienced anything like this? Any advice? I'm in DBT and therapy and trying everything I know to do. I'm a college student and always on the go, I need some help. Thanks in advance.

Tyani, Thank you so much for being brave enough to post this. I'm one week post op and I am sitting here feeling so sorry for myself. I found out today that I'm also on my period. I've been alternating between yelling at my husband and family or crying about anything. Luckily my family and husband were both told by my surgeon that I would probably react this way because I have mental illness and couldn't take my antidepressant and anti anxiety pills for about a week. Hearing that others feel somewhat like that helps me feel hopeful. I just regret this so much, and I hurt constantly. But I need to give it time. Thanks so much for your post.

November 7th is my magic day! I've been working really hard, started at 375 4 months ago and just weighed in at 335 this morning. Early approval from my insurance due to how hard I worked. Both parents have had the gastric sleeve, but RNY seemed to be the better choice for me. I'm so excited, but also kinda scared/nervous. Only had one major surgery in my life and it went fine, it's just the unknown. Still thinking of what to pack in my hospital bag. Luckily, I'll have my mom and dad and fiance there with me day of.