BrightEyes42

I have worked for months to get to this point... My surgery is in five days... This liquid preop diet is getting to me... I live with 4 other people and all their cooking is making me crazy... I was lighting candles in my room so I couldn't smell it... I haven't cheated and I won't... I just needed to vent

That's totally true. I feel safe being invisible. I don't like to go out in public because it makes me feel bad. I hate running into people who haven't seen me in a while. My reunion was a nightmare. All reasons to continue on with surgery I know. I am going to do it. I'm just scared.

I'm worried about cutting out 80 to 85% of my stomach yes. Not unusual I would imagine. I have read about complications and it is possible. I have two kids and I worry. I admit I am a worrier by nature. I have been jumping through every hoop I was given to be here today because I know how important it is to get my health back. Yes I am seeing a counselor because I have had things happen in my past that demolished my self esteem. One of the main reasons I'm doing this is because I want to be there for my kids when they're older. My dad died when I was 23 and never watched me get married or never got the chance to hold his grandchildren. I don't want to miss those things. I'm 42 now and I figure it's now or never. I've lost almost 40 pounds since I started this because I take it seriously. I'm just afraid of the unknown I guess. I've been a planner my whole life and I just don't know what to expect because we're all different. I really do appreciate feedback and the time it takes you to write it.

Thank you so much for responding . I have felt pretty alone in this and it really helps to talk with people who understand.

I am a week and a half from surgery and I'm so nervous. Are the complications that come with this worth it? It's permanent. There is no going back. I think I'm also afraid to be thinner and that's so messed up. Every time in the past when I started to really get the weight off I would sabotage myself and gain it all back plus some. I can't do that after this. I guess I just have the jitters. I can't seem to shut my brain off... Maybe it's the only liquids preop diet going to my head.

My surgery is scheduled for January 25th at Rockwood in Spokane. I keep going back and forth between feeling excited and feeling scared. I had so many requirements to get here it's almost surreal that it's finally happening.

My surgery date is January 25th and I'm getting really nervous. I'm hungry all the time on the pre op diet. I'm worried about possible complications during surgery. I have two kids I'm worried about. I don't feel like I can talk to anyone because they don't understand what I'm going through. Sorry to be a downer. I keep trying to look at the bigger picture but it's not always easy.