Fenton

Whatever the verdict, I don't think there'll be rioting. It's really a sad affair for all concerned, but it's kind of marginalized into the Queens courthouse, and I don't get the impression that community passions are that inflamed. But again, I live and work in Manhattan, and may be 100% wrong. I know what you mean, Amanda, but I've not suggested to my brother that he gets banded. The thing is, he's so overweight, and he looks like a cardiac arrest waiting to happen. His neck is really thick, too - former sportsman, still lifts weights - and I'm sure he must have sleep apnea. I just want him to be well and safe.

Something I found on the Gizmodo gadget website, this might be useful to people who weigh their food: This spoon, which looks like a prop from CSI, has built-in scales so you can scoop and check the amount all in one. Made of ABS plastic and stainless steel, it has an LCD screen, and an accuracy of 0.005 ounces. It also measures in metric or imperial and can keep track of added weights. Just make sure you use it for cooking ingredients, and not for measuring stuff that might get you a visit from CSI for real. Available for about $37. [ProIdee via OhGizmo, GeekAlerts] scale Spoon: Spoon With Built-In Scales, Perfect for Dieters and Dealers

I think it's very natural for siblings to be competitive. The more she tattles on what she imagines to be your cheating, the more you can have the satisfaction of proving her wrong by losing weight. If you confront her about it, she'll just make it seem like a trivial thing. What's more important than her behaviour is YOUR behaviour. You went to a situation that was filled with opportunities for cheating and failure, and you were EXCELLENT! Let the Diet Police say what they will say, you made your plan, you faced temptation, and you won. I think that, in the long run, this might benefit your sister, too; if she's comparing herself to you, perhaps your weight loss will force her to try harder to lose weight. I feel sorry for her, I have to say. She's absolutely the villain here, but you're really doing something to take control of your weight, while she is repeating steps that have failed in the past. No wonder she's envious...

Lynn, you can't let yourself sweat plateaus! They're going to happen, they're a natural part of weight loss, and while the weight may be staying the same, you're still losing fat. You have to keep that in mind when the needle becomes lazy, and focus instead on NSV's. Like how good you feel, or a suddenly useless belt! My brother's overweight too; I'd like him to get a band. I didn't say that Tuesday night, but I talked about how important it is to lose weight, and how the band is pretty much foolproof. He didn't say anything about the bread; he had the same amount of bread as I did, but he had a bass ceviche appetizer and then a big steak entree, while all I had was half of a crab entree. I'm going to work on the band idea with him next week. He's one of these high-powered businessmen, huge salary, millions of dollars in bonuses, and that's all very well, but it comes with huge amounts of stress. I think it might be hard for him to take a week off to get banded. He's talking about going back to the famous medical weight loss center where, after his last visit, he lost 60 pounds. But statistically, supposedly, when you have more than 25 pounds to lose, it's almost impossible to keep it off without surgery.

(Wow! You can tell that SOMEONE missed being able to log on today!!!)

Oh, I had a good NSV today! I discovered that my belt, straining to cinch me in 2 and half months ago, needed to be tightened another notch! And, when I went to tighten it, I discovered that I've used up all the holes! It is dead to me now! My lapband killed my belt!

Frances, hang in there. It's physically impossible for you to keep taking in very few calories and burning a lot of them without burning up some fat. The plateau is most likely just retained water, and will disappear overnight one of these days. Just keep on going! It'll happen.

On the plus side, though, I did go to that restaurant and I didn't order the steak I love. And I didn't order dessert.

Well, I think that the Diva kind of NAILS it with "the next minute is a new minute". I - and many others here, I suspect - have a problem with what I shall call the "gateway bite": a small taste of something delicious and "forbidden" that erodes my strength and unleashes an uncontrolled flood of eating. I very much have an all or nothing mentality, that if I eat over 1200 calories one day, I might as well take in 4,000. The big issue isn't whether or not you slip - we'll ALL slip, particularly those of us who have a lot of weight to lose, and who'll be on this road for a long long time. And it doesn't matter how much you slip. The important thing is how you react to the slip, if you decide to let a few minutes of bad eating, or an evening of bad eating, or a day of bad eating turn into two days, a week, a month or a lifetime of bad eating. Yesterday, I'd had my food for the day, maybe 1200 calories, when my brother called and said he was in town, and wanted to go out to dinner. I took him to one of my favourite restaurants, and he had a ceviche appetizer, and then the steak I love so well, and I had a half-order of soft shell crabs. They were dredged in something and fried, served with fingerling potatoes and corn and a smoked pepper sauce. And I ate my crab and it was delicious and I loved it. And would have married it, had that been an option. What upset me wasn't that I ate the crab, but the bread I ate. The bread there is amazing, and I had a 7 grain roll and a small piece of hazelnut and raisin focaccia. And that doesn't upset me. What DID upset me was that I had a second round of the rolls. I didn't need to do that, and it felt - unlike the crab or the first pair of rolls - like an uncontrolled action. So it made me unhappy, reminded me that lurking under the discipline is a ravenous monster that wants to go on a rampage with my health. Today I was back to the routine, 1200 cals. I think I need more Protein, though, and the Isopure premade drinks have gone up in price.

Nice work, HopeinApril! Maybe even more on the shirt tuck than the further two pound loss... ! I really like reading other people's victories - I kind of feel that whenever any one of us loses, or has an NSV, we all share in their victory, because it validates what we're doing. It's proof that if you eat right, exercise and listen to the band, the process works. I had a weird NSV today: I'm not a slipper-wearin' dude. Indeed, unless you're a lord in a drafty Scottish castle, I think men wearing slippers is kind of sissified. But I didn't want to walk around the hospital in bare feet during my admission, so I bought slippers online. But when they arrived, I could barely wedge my feet into them; in the end, it didn't matter, since the hospital gives you disposable socks with those stripes of paint on the bottom for grip. ANYWAY! So today my housekeeper left my slippers out by my bed, and they looked so cozy sitting there that I thought, "Hmm... these may be too small, and make me sissified to boot, but I'm going to try them on!" And my feet slipped right into them, and there was so much space that my toes almost felt lonely - truly the first sign of sissification! SO that was nice. If a little dainty.

Christine, I'd like to try tai chi too. I bought a couple of home tai chi DVDs, but they're kind of peculiar - you look at Rodney Yee doing yoga, and it's, like, "Yeah... Ancient Asian wisdom! The path to a beautiful mind in a beautiful body!", but if you look at my tai chi DVDs, it's like "Hmmm. A group of lumpy Australians in sweat suits doing weird exercises..." Harley, clearly you hit the sauce prior to heading to work this morning. What, the Ice Tea talk too seductive for you to resist? Music: if we start turning on the Journey, I will run screaming out of here! Amanda - I love Duran Duran, and "Save a Prayer" is one of my favourites. I figure once this whole thing is done, I'll take a month off and travel in Asia, maybe in Sri Lanka, where the "Save a Prayer" video was shot. Thanks Lynn and KPod for the kind words re: my book, and KPod! THANKS for posting that exercise link! It's great!

I've not been in many yoga studios, but they're pretty good about being non-judgemental, and about working with the limitations of your body. It's fantastic exercise, but it also makes you feel really good.

I LOVE yoga! I haven't been doing it for about the last 100 pounds. But my plan was to start on March 17. However, March 17th rolled around, and I found that, after working with weights for a while, just doing some upper body and chest work, I found that I had some really sharp pains around my port. So I've decided that yoga - and possibly weights, particularly anything that involves tensing the abdominal muscles into which the port is sewn, should probably wait for me. Generally, though, by about six weeks, your body can form pretty tight scar tissue - broken bones heal by about six weeks, which is why you get to get rid of your cast at six weeks. So I suspect the surgical site is pretty well healed. But I don't want to stress it, particularly after reading texgirl's doctor's comments, so I'll take it easy. I know at this stage, far from tearing out the port, the bigger worry is weakening the abdo wall near the port, and risking a hernia developing at the surgical site - and I don't want THAT, either! But when you DO start yoga, you'll find it's great. Calming, centering, and even good for you physically! You really feel good. I would recommend starting with the Rodney Yee DVD A.M. YOGA FOR BEGINNERS. It's a simple, non-stressful 20 minute routine, ideal for beginners, a good introduction to yoga. If you like it, and practice for a while, then you should take a yoga class. In NYC, particularly in my neighbourhood, there are yoga studios on every corner. I think someday I'll do it in a group again, but until I'm at a less worrisome weight, I'll just do it in my loft. Besides, the cats find it highly entertaining.

Thanks again, all. Carrie, yeah, you've got to get rid of the candy. Don't let it sit around until you're able to rationalize why it'd be alright for you to have just... one... bite... Because you'll take that bite, and it'll be good, and then you'll rationalize another bite, and once that's done, you might as well polish off the whole bar, and once you've polished off the whole bar, what the heck, why not polish off the other four? If you MUST have chocolate, break off a piece of one bar, THEN THROW THE REST AWAY! And throw them in a way that can't be reversed - don't let yourself have the option of rationalizing digging them out of the garbage! Throw the rest of the chocolate away, then sit at a table, and eat your piece of chocolate focusing on its flavor. And afterwards, accept that you've had a calorie bump, and figure out how you're going to take care of those calories. A long walk? Perhaps some weight training? Half a chocolate bar is, what, 100 calories? Not the end of the world. Just don't set yourself up for failure by stocking up on temptations. How much did the surgery cost you? If insurance paid for it, not in money but in time, and worry, and coordinating all those pre-approval visits and info sessions and researching on the net. You have expectations and goals, and you'll be able to meet them if you just keep your head in the game... I know you've had a rough ride so far, but don't let that stop you embracing this lifestyle. A tough week or so doesn't mean you get to blow your life away on crap.

Ha! How strange to see my real name on the board! Chica's recommendation is for my book, PRECIOUS BLOOD by Jonathan Hayes. Although around here I'm SO used to being "Fenton"! Thanks for the congratulations in posts and private emails, all. I'm pleased about the interest, but, since the book is the first in a series of five with the main character, I'm going to be playing it pretty cool as far as committing movie rights at this stage... Anyone interested in the book - or me, I suppose - can read about it on my website at Jonathan Hayes . Or on Amazon.com or wherever you buy books - support your local independent book dealers! My publicist would be proud of me right now...

Congratulations, Teri! It's funny that - sometimes after I have a calorie splurge, I also have a weight loss burst, too. I've heard that having an occasional increase in calories can actually kick up a metabolic rate that's sunk to deal with low caloric intake; I don't know if that's something that can be used to manipulate weight loss. Knowing many of us, I think it's something that's more likely to be used to manipulate our calorie intake!

Also, I'm happy because my book has just come out in the UK and is apparently doing well, and my work on the sequel is going well. Best of all, maybe, a production company wants the movie rights to the book... Not an NSV, a NLBV!

Although still snow-free, and gloomily facing a week where the temps will be back in the mid-70's and the skies sunny and blue, with even LESS prospect of snow, I'm in a good mood today. I woke up feeling lighter, and reweighed myself; the scale has gone down a couple more notches since yesterday, so I'm On Target to be under 400 by June 1. Which is great! I have no dobut I'm nauseating a few people with my rapid weight loss: the trick is to not get banded until you're 473 pounds! Rest assured, I'll be hitting the hard part a year from now, when you're all at goal, lounging around in bikinis and harassing the pool boy...

Christine - you're more than welcome for the SFO. And congrats on the loss so far! You snowbound folk! Stop talking about the snow! I got NONE last year, and I love that stuff! Lynn: 45 mins for 3 miles is GREAT!

I have to say, I'm really lucky to have Noa as a friend. She's really supportive and kind, and I could never let anyone else - in the REAL world! - know my weight, or my belt size or pants size. But I'm comfortable around her.

As far as feeling your port goes, hopefully we'll ALL be able to feel our ports, eventually. In fact, we'll probably be able to see them, too, if we're successful. I reweighed myself today after a week, and I'm down another 3 lbs; it would have been more, had I not fallen prey to the damn white chocolate and raspberry tarts they have at le Pain Quotidien. They're not big, but I've had several this week; I'm guessing they're about 500 calories a pop - EMPTY calories! But they have a raspberry on them, which is fruit, so I feel they're profoundly rewarding at the nutritional level. So, yeah, that's something to kick in the head. I've been exercising a lot - I'm walking as much as I can, trying to beat my pedometer each day. My max was almost 16000 steps on Wednesday, a lot for my hulking bulk. And I've started using my dumbells, about 15 minutes every other day, a dopy routine that I have "created". I didn't start yoga - I couldn't find the strap I needed, but I found my mat and the yoga blocks, so I will start today. Things are going well. Last weekend, my friend Noa came over and we went through my main clothes stash, discarding stuff that was too big. I have a rather sad collection of clothes of increasing size, many new with labels, a grim testament to my rise through the weight classes, and my optimistic shopping habits. But it was good. The really large stuff we took to Goodwill. I will keep one pair of enormous trophy pants. And we organized the bins by size, with the smallest sizes at the bottom, and the biggest on top; the plan is that I will gradually work my way down the pile to the slimmer clothes. At the very least, I'm not going to have to go clothes shopping for a while. So, I've shifted down in pants size, down 4 notches on my belt, 4" in my pants size. I'm still wearing my big shirts, but now the Tall shirts I have, cut slim, are loose on me. Since I've always bought pretty much identical clothes, and am still wearing clothes that are too big for me, I think people notice the weight loss less. Only a few people have commented on my weight loss - and I'm at 55 pounds lost! Still, when you weigh 175 and lose 55 pounds, that's a huge amount. When you weigh 475 and lose 55 pounds, it's comparatively not such a striking loss. The important thing is that everything's going in the right direction. The other important thing is that I feel really pretty fracking GOOD, with a lot more energy to walk and wrestle with cats and Take Care of Business...

On the website, it claims to be able to calculate your calorie intake. Have you tried that? How accurate is it? That seems like voodoo science to me, considering all the different folk and their different metabolisms...

I'm in the same boat. Dr. Fielding recommends no drinking for five minutes before, or for 20 minutes after; I have extra confidence in his opinion because 1. his surgical practice does a LOT of research and 2. he himself has a band. He's a bit of a foodie, and he says that when he goes out to dinner, he finishes his glass of wine before he begins eating.

Whoaahhh! Slow down there, little lady! We can't have the fillies invading our masculine preserve! Here, don't look at anything else, but go to this item, and look at post 11, where an XY has posted an image from the BodyBugg program; it's actually pretty cool: http://www.lapbandtalk.com/f110/so-do-i-need-fill-how-should-i-eating-57161/ For crying out loud, if you get the urge to post, STIFLE IT! There's a sign nailed to the main tree branch that says NO GURLZ ALOUD.

Well, now I'm pretty sure Mike is going to look better in a bikini than Spirit! My incisions are also pretty small, most about 1/2", the port incision maybe a little under 2".