Are you a fat personality or not?

Not all fat people have fat personalities. I'm sorry I disrupted a mental health thread with this yesterday, I didnt realise and it was inappropriate. But I've got to get this off my chest.

I'm done with the whiny pathetic excuse making marshmallows populating this board. Get some backbone, and wake up to reality. This thing takes WORK.

We all fall off the wagon, we all make mistakes, what is it that makes some of us dust ourselves off and keep going and some of us refuse to admit the mistake, blaming everything and everyone but ourselves?

I've never really understood pre band psychological counselling, but now I do. Some people here should never ever have been banded. Not until they did some serious work on themselves first. Its very sad. But the tool is there when they're ready to use it. If they could EVER admit that they need to change things up a bit.

The band is so wonderful. You can lose weight slowly. You can even do it without exercise. You can get to a low BMI or not, you can stop where you please. You can feel in control of your food for the first time in your life. You can be super strict and lose weight at the speed of light and have cosmetic surgery and be the hottest thing on 2 legs. You can do low carb or not.

For some, sadly its just not the right tool. I have respect for people who decide that and go for something else or who choose another surgery int he first place. But for many, its so versatile. Sadly there's some people who still dont lose. They have medical and physical issues that need attention. They may have gotten so big that they really struggle to move around let alone exercise. They are in real trouble and need help and compassion.

But there's also a whole lot who are just, well, pathetic. They wanted to lose weight but they wanted someone else to do it for them, afterall its not their fault their fat right? So they get this band and WHAT? It doesnt do it all?

This thread is not compassionate. I dont hate fat people, heck, I *AM* a fat person. I dont believe I will be anything other than a fat person in remission. I feel compassion for the plight people find themselves in, I feel that for every single person. But when they refuse to help themselves, it evaporates.

Now, I'm the first person to admit I dont understand much about mental health issues like depression. I know its wrong, but I do sometimes fall into the "just snap out of it" camp. I realise there's stuff like that involved. But nine times out of ten, struggling with a band just comes down to being unwilling to pull your finger out and face your issues.

So when people post threads seeking help and then oh so politely come up with an excuse to every single helpful suggestion, look out, I just might BITE!

And nobody had better DARE so "if I could do that, I wouldnt have needed a lapband". That is quite honestly the stupidest thing that I have ever heard on this forum and unfortunately its been said many many times. If you seriously believe that, you are in more trouble than a lapband can get you out of!

Edited June 21, 200818 yr by Jachut

Jachut, Love your attitude. I think that's a large part of the reason why you've done so well, You and Wasa and others like ya'll are a great insperation to me. you seem to be a hard worker, That's my goal after i'm banded. Thx :thumbs_up:

I think this discussion is interesting and for the most part, a positive method of understanding one another. I do have a concern though about this going (again) to a personal level of focusing on one or more members specifically. I think this thread would be better served if we focus on the "topic" of the thread rather than specific members that may fall into catergories of discussion.

Jachut-great thread. I would have to say I do not have a "fat" personality. I've always worked out, just never for what I needed. I started lifting when I was in h.s. and wanted to get big and bad for football. I ate alot to keep that up.

After h.s. and my dreams of college greatness evaporated with knee injuries, I continued to eat the same way and didn't work out as much. As time passed, I would start working out for 6 mos to a year, then drop it again for various reasons. Still working at bulking up and getting stronger though. Eating habits continued the same.

I've always said, when I get to the gym, few people outwork me. But, I never had the resolve to continue going to the gym on a consistent basis.

I was banded 10 mos ago almost to the day. In that time, I've maybe missed 15-16 days at the gym. TOTAL. Not in one month, in 10 months. Is that a little excessive? Yes, but I like how I feel when I get done in the morning with cardio and LOVE how I feel when I get done lifting at night. That's right, two a days 4 days a week. Cardio pretty much EVERY day.

Now, I look in the mirror when lifting and see muscles that have never been there. I'm not getting huge, just more defined.

This is a tool. And a damn good one if you are willing to work with it. Don't make it do all the work for you. Suck it up and get to work.

Or as Jachut says: "Shut your gob and DO IT!"

I didn't read this thread, just the last couple of pages, but from what I read here and on the other thread, this is my take. Right or wrong, this is what I see.

Those who are not doing well, not watching well what is going in their mouths, not exercising or not exercising enough, they seem to be the folks that are all about head patting and supporting negative behaviors. Those that busted their butts and did the job have the attitude that they did it, anyone can.

Seems to me this is where the conflict, nasty undertones, and P&A posting is coming from.

We've already chased away one member (Laurend), perhaps it is time to let this die a big bad sorry death.

perhaps it is time to let this die a big bad sorry death.

Wow, we actually agree on something.

Those who are not doing well, not watching well what is going in their mouths, not exercising or not exercising enough, they seem to be the folks that are all about head patting and supporting negative behaviors. Those that busted their butts and did the job have the attitude that they did it, anyone can.

Seems to me this is where the conflict, nasty undertones, and P&A posting is coming from.

We've already chased away one member (Laurend), perhaps it is time to let this die a big bad sorry death.

I didn't know we chased away Laurend. She was posting on this thread last night:confused:. Look, I've been successfull, too. I've fallen off the wagon and am in the process of dusting myself off. I busted my butt, too. Just like a reformed smoker, there is nothing worse than a reformed fatty. Even when I was at my best, I still had some class about it. What does it matter if we are still offering support for people not doing it OUR WAY? If these types of people offend you, just move on. Don't start a whole thread to knock them down even more. They will find their way, eventually.

Jachut,

I closed down my two threads that seemed to incite a lot useless fighting back and forth, I'd suggest you do your part to end this madness. We can all agree to disagree. Think about how it looks to a lot of newbies out there. You've got a lot to share with others, we may not agree philosophically but it's bad when it starts affecting the morale of the board. Thanks brandyII-Nanook (got married and decided to hyphenate my user name)

Mr. Gorbachev tear down that thread(s)

I didn't know we chased away Laurend. She was posting on this thread last night:confused:. Look, I've been successfull, too. I've fallen off the wagon and am in the process of dusting myself off. I busted my butt, too. Just like a reformed smoker, there is nothing worse than a reformed fatty. Even when I was at my best, I still had some class about it. What does it matter if we are still offering support for people not doing it OUR WAY? If these types of people offend you, just move on. Don't start a whole thread to knock them down even more. They will find their way, eventually.

If people with no class bother you, pehaps you shuld ignore them? If reformed fatties offend you so, perhaps you should ignore them? Isn't that what you are telling others to do?

Jachut,

I closed down my two threads that seemed to incite a lot useless fighting back and forth, I'd suggest you do your part to end this madness. We can all agree to disagree. Think about how it looks to a lot of newbies out there. You've got a lot to share with others, we may not agree philosophically but it's bad when it starts affecting the morale of the board. Thanks brandyII-Nanook (got married and decided to hyphenate my user name)

Mr. Gorbachev tear down that thread(s)

Closing threads does nothing to stop the argument. It just creates spin off threads like this one that go down exactly the same path. When people post in the public domain, they cannot expect everyone to agree (or agree to disagree) then get huffy and close the thread down when it doesn't go as expected.

If people with no class bother you, pehaps you shuld ignore them? If reformed fatties offend you so, perhaps you should ignore them? Isn't that what you are telling others to do?

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Yup, but the difference is, this is a support forum. And even though this is called RnR, there should still be some standards. Why not take it to MYSPACE or something if all you want to do is complain about people.

This is R&R. R&R is not a support forum.

If you want support, go to the other forums (there are plenty of them).

This is R&R. R&R is not a support forum.

If you want support, go to the other forums (there are plenty of them).

I'm sure that Alex did not start this forum with the intention of watching a bunch of women being nasty and bitching about other members.

Chickie,

You know I've always respected your avatar as I am a big Little Britain fan but I think closing my threads was a good way to stop it from my end, she started another one up out of frustration, I know that. She can also close it if she wants it to end and people can stop discussing it if we want. It's a symbolic gesture of peace. If someone else chooses to start up a new one continuing this stupid nonsense then they're just being foolish and I choose not to play game any more! brandyII-Nanook

I'm sure that Alex did not start this forum with the intention of watching a bunch of women being nasty and bitching about other members.

I think you're on to something, lol, what's next jello wrestling?

And you know what? I am so tired of this RnR disclaimer that seems to be an easy way of saying "I can be the biggest bitch ever, and it's ok because we are in RnR". There is still an amount of class and maturity that should be involved in ANY PART of this site.

I'm sure that Alex did not start this forum with the intention of watching a bunch of women being nasty and bitching about other members.

So? What do we do then? Close R&R's because a couple of people get offended at the drop of a hat?

And don't talk to me about being called names honey. I have had seven shades of shit thrown at me for little more than being at goal weight. Know what I did? Laughed at the childish bullshit and went on with my day. It really is that simple.

Chickie,

You know I've always respected your avatar as I am a big Little Britain fan but I think closing my threads was a good way to stop it from my end, she started another one up out of frustration, I know that. She can also close it if she wants it to end and people can stop discussing it if we want. It's a symbolic gesture of peace. If someone else chooses to start up a new one continuing this stupid nonsense then they're just being foolish and I choose not to play game any more! brandyII-Nanook

I don't think closing threads solves anything. It's my opinion. And you know what they say about opinions and assholes...

But I must say, that if you *really* didn't want this to go on, you would not have posted on this thread. You would have taken the high road and ignored it.