I was originally supposed to get my surgery about 4 months ago and ended up canceling it because I did not know if I could deal with this major life style change. I have made an app and rescheduled about three times already, when I was only days away I would chicken out and postpone it once again.

My dr told me the most recent time that I saw him that I could no longer reschedule my surgery and that if I did he would not be able to perform it on me.

My surgery us once again days away! an here I am wanting to postpone/ cancel it, why? because I have yet to fully get my over eating hobbits under control. I am very much addicted to food an been craving it like crazy. Any opinions of wat I should do? Also I am supposed to be on my two week post op diet of two shakes a day and a sensible dinner. I have completely wasted the first week of this diet because I did not follow it at all, I actually over ate. I have one week left to do this diet and so far I have been sticking to it, do u think because I am following the diet for one week instead of two it can cause complications?

My surgeon is very direct and harsh and just has a dominating/ intimidating personality, not willing to hear about my struggles. That's why I do not feel comfortable speaking to him unfortunately. I'm 21 years old and am very stressed

any help please

I think you should ask yourself why you keep rescheduling instead of flat out cancelling and reevaluating your situation.

As others have said, therapy of some sort is needed. Even if it's just a discussion with your PCP about your indecisiveness and stress - they may recognize some other underlying problem that can be addressed. Actual counseling is always helpful if you just need a place to talk through your concerns to help clear your head and make a decision.

And definitely do some research to see if you can switch surgeons. I've seen my share of doctors over the years for various reasons. Life is too short to trust your life to a physician that has no empathy. In my experience, for every 2 ass hole doctors there is one really good one waiting to be found, you just have to keep looking and not settle.

Edited April 17, 20188 yr by ylime

here's my take on it you are really young to be getting this surgery. there is a lot to contend with at your age. not drinking be a big one. in my program it is one full year. wow at 21 i sure as heck would not have wanted to give that up. also going out to get crap food with my friends while drinking was a major thing be cause we were all broke in college and a McDonald double cheese burger costs less than a pan era cease er salad with grilled chicken. so yeah i get it. but man if i would have gotten my crap together i would have done this years sooner spent way less time as heavy as i am my knees would not be a wreck my back would not be a wreck my hips. but i agree right now you need therapy. i did intense therapy for two years before surgery was even an option. because i needed healing alot of my food issues were routed in trauma of my past. and i used my weight as a shield to keep people from hurting me but not every one does that but tons of young people do so please get therapy revisit this in a few years

I cancelled 4 times (won’t admit to more) always get surgery date and I chicken out but bc I’m scared to go under now I have date for May 14 and plan to stick to it!

Sweetie, I agree with the above posters that you are too young for this surgery. There is absolutely no shame in that. It is a big life changing commitment and as hard as you know it will be, it’s actually harder. If you are unable to commit to the liquid diet, I fear that you will be unable to commit to the post surgery diet, at which point could be detrimental.

My suggestion - talk to a therapist about your addition to food, see a nutritionist to learn healthy eating habits and find a form of exercise that you love. If financially possible for you, get a personal trainer to kick your ass in the gym once a week. And then, in a few years you still think you may need the surgery, revisit the idea when you are more ready for it.

Good luck with everything.

On 4/16/2018 at 9:51 PM, connie123lok said:

I was originally supposed to get my surgery about 4 months ago and ended up canceling it because I did not know if I could deal with this major life style change. I have made an app and rescheduled about three times already, when I was only days away I would chicken out and postpone it once again.

My dr told me the most recent time that I saw him that I could no longer reschedule my surgery and that if I did he would not be able to perform it on me.

My surgery us once again days away! an here I am wanting to postpone/ cancel it, why? because I have yet to fully get my over eating hobbits under control. I am very much addicted to food an been craving it like crazy. Any opinions of wat I should do? Also I am supposed to be on my two week post op diet of two shakes a day and a sensible dinner. I have completely wasted the first week of this diet because I did not follow it at all, I actually over ate. I have one week left to do this diet and so far I have been sticking to it, do u think because I am following the diet for one week instead of two it can cause complications?

My surgeon is very direct and harsh and just has a dominating/ intimidating personality, not willing to hear about my struggles. That's why I do not feel comfortable speaking to him unfortunately. I'm 21 years old and am very stressed

any help please

I am dying to know what you decided to do!

As strict as I posted before, down deep I do care about you, you do have a place in life and we want you to be able to find it. Darlin' you do matter and maybe to,love people than you think. And like my Bari-Bud Apple right above me, I too would like to hear the rest of the stor. You felt your doctor was not someone you could not be comfotable,with. I'll,give you my ex doctor. I thought I HAD meshed well with him. He was smooth, shiney, handsome in apearance, but like a coral snake , pretty in coloration. but ultimately poisonous with no antivenom available to me. My insurance and I wasted time and money on him and he turned out to be as shallow as the average mud puddle and just as dirty in his soul.
Please take care of yourself, you have many years ahead of you. Live them well.?

You seriously need mental health provider. You are not in the right mental state for this procedure. You surgery will not be successful if u do not control habitats. I recommend trying to lose the weight yourself first and controlling it that way with mental health. You are emotionally eating. Until u control and change behaviors your surgery will not be a successful one

My question is, were you signed off by a psychologist and nutritionist? Were you honest with both of them about your continued addiction to food? I'm surprised either of them would approve you for surgery if you are not mentally ready. I agree with others, definitely seek out some therapy and then reconsider surgery. If you go into the surgery with these unresolved issues, you will find it very hard to be compliant and stick to very small portions of food for the rest of your life. Good luck!

Your surgeon is not your counselor, neither is the surgeon's staff, and the extra paperwork you are repeatedly asking them to do is out of line. Yes -they do get paid to guide you through this process, but the process for them is your surgery and recovery. Not your mental or emotional struggles. For every patient that cancels over and over and would like a therapy session at each visit, there are 100 more patients who will not require this extra hassle.