Marcus (my oldest) is 11 and is in 5th grade.

He just had his first physical altercation with a school bully. The 'bully' is also a 5th grader and has had MANY issues with the school. For example, the big issues are destroying school property & theft.. always in trouble!

My boy hasnt ever been in trouble (neither has 95% of the kids in his grade). He goes to a magnet school where the kids have to score a certain level to qualify for this program.. so, 'troubled kids' arent a big issue here.

Anyway, about a month ago the Bully had issues with my daughter - he started calling her names. She was VERY upset (Goodness, she's in K and the Bully's in 5th grade!!) so I consulted the Principal - and she handled the situation.

Things have been calm since then.. until today.

An exchange of words happened between Marcus and Bully. Bully started punching Marcus in the back. Marcus turned and pushed him down - telling him to leave him alone. Bully took Marcus' backpack and flung it across the school yard then went back at Marcus - rolling up his sleeves and started hitting him in the arm!

Everything happened so fast..

Im there to p/u the kids.. Marcus gets in the van upset. He starts telling me the story and showing me the marks on his arm that Bully had just made. I pull to the front of the school and get the principal involved.

So here is where I need LBT's help...

if this were YOUR kid involved in this situation - HOW would you advise him to handle himself IF this happens again? (repeated hits)

Mike and I have talked to Marcus many MANY times about a hypothetical situation of a bully picking on him - and for him to get the bully's attention by good eye contact, and telling him to LEAVE ME ALONE. Standing his ground.

But this was different.

It became physical.

All you Moms/Dads/Educators/Grandparents... what is YOUR advice??

I don't have kids yet, but in my mind, I would just keep going up the ladder until I got a response that I thought might have any lasting effect. If the principal is only going to suspend him, you can go up to the superintendant, etc up to the school board, or you can go up to the police, and file a charge against the boy. At that age, it usually just involved a citation, which means a fine for the parents, which may or may not do anything to the boy the first time, but a few of those and he'll end up in a detention center.

I do think that kids should be encouraged to defend themselves, as long as you have a good moral Fiber attached.

I kind of cringe to think what schools are going to be like when I have kids. They are banning tag from schools now. Not too long before the ban sharp pencils...