I am a happily married man, married to my 3rd wife and now I know how to be a husband. my wife and I have been together 10 great loving years now and I purposley do anything that would hurt her. and if I did she would while we were alone let me know how she felt. You need to quietly and respectfully with no one else around tell him everything you mentioned in your last paragraph. Thats what he needs to hear. he needs to know that your scared and that you are serious about doing this. and not just want but need his support. He obviosly loves you. And I would have to imagine that is not an easy thing to do. Talk to him he will listen. Talk means to have a conversation. Which means you have to listen to his concerns as well. Try doing this without putting up walls and automatically thinking he is attacking you. He's not I can assure you of this. He is just concerned as you are. Hope this helps.