tinker0614

I feel like I am on a merry go round and I know it isn't taking me anywhere but I can't get off. Not trying to whine or get on a pity party but I am truly upset with myself. Finding myself getting back into the same rut of putting myself down and talking about how darn fat I am. I AM NOT LOSING! I can't see what I am doing wrong because I eat very little. In fact I can't eat much before dinner. Breakfast and lunch seem to be something of the past. What I am eating doesn't seem to stay down very long. Finding myself going to soft things and I know that not all of them are low in calories. I wanted to go back to work after the summer and at least look like I lost some weight. Now....if I carry the picture of before the surgery around my neck you would probably be able to tell. All I seem to get from my family is ..."I can tell in your face." Darn I want it to show in several other places that are much larger than my face! I am down that I really haven't lost but maybe 5 lbs in 2 months. I wonder if it was worth it...... Totally I have lost 40 lbs 6 months. Close to half of that was before the surgery. Now comes the part where I stop and ask how do you get back up again? I just wish I could get over this huge hump! Whew....I feel a little better. Anyone been there and got through it? HOW? I truly want this to work but think I must be doing something wrong. Just getting back from vacation and seeing people in bikinis might have escalated the need of urgency in my cry!

Thanks....I am going to try the protein drink. Sounds like a good way to jump start the day. I didn't realize how much this support meant to me. I know I am not the only one going through this but at times I feel so consumed by "weight thing." Today has been good. I really do appreciate the advice. Here's to lighter days!

Thanks for the words of encouragement.Today is a new day and I am trying to approach it as an opportunity to get back on track. I am just scared that I am going to "fail" at this as if it is a test. I am sure I need to watch closer the things that I can seem to keep down They aren't my best choices of foods. Thanks again and I hope you have a good day.

I had a similar problem and my Dr. said it was o.k. for a day or two. The whole idea was the help shrink the liver if I am not mistaken and start the will power! Check with him. It didn't hurt me any. Also I was able to use pre mixed drinks. Don't let that throw ya! Check with your Dr. and good luck!

I just had a second fill...the first didn't seem to do anything. I could still eat what I wanted, when I wanted. Now, I am not sure what is happening but have had what I can best describe as a severe throat cramp. Now I know there is a better name for it but the darn thing hurts like *$(*#. I don't know if it is because I ate something that I shouldn't have and it doesn't agree or did I eat too fast. All I know is that I don't want it to happen again. It takes my breath away! Mouth waters like Niagra Falls but nothing else happens. I was in New Orleans this weekend and embarassed myself something awful! I was eatting with no problem then all of a sudden my eyes got big and this moaning started that I didn't think I would ever be able to stop! The people next to us thought I was having a heart attack. I have to laugh now but boy was it a sight! WHAT IS THAT? Anyone have that happen before?

I am a little discouraged at this point. Haven't been filled yet...have two more weeks before the big day. I love reading all the post but keep seeing where people have lost 10-15 pounds in 6 months. I would not be very happy. Yes, at least you are losing but I need to lose more than that and faster! Of course, I am one that wants it all NOW! REally, I know the band is a tool but I was understanding that it should work better. Does the band need to be tighter or does it just work different on different people? I am just wondering if I spent a lot of money on something that didn't work better than my other diet "plans" I really am not trying to be pestimistic but honestly wondering if anyone has a good story to tell! I am just a little anxious.....impatient....and curious. Just really looking for some encouragement. thanks

Thanks for the encouragement! It is nice knowing that there are people that are there to cheer you on. I have decided to stop worrying about the negative reports and do what is right for me. Trying to sabatoge yourself before you get started good is a perscription for failure. But WOW! I love reading what y'all have accomplished ....YES there has been some serious weight loss...It is amazing at how many people feel the way I do. YOu know, it is hard to say some of the things I feel to loved ones because they really don't fully understand the "fight" but here....on this site there are many that are walking the same path. I am glad to have the company of so many wonderful people. Here is to being HEALTHY and FIT!

I thought long and hard before I was banned on Feb. 15th. I was tired of being this big and felt I knew what I was gettting into. I am not really hungry just a little bummed out on broth. think the biggest problem is that someone took my security way....I have turned to food for so many things. When I was happy, sad , depressed or just for the heck of it. Now that is gone. I know it sounds like I have a mental problem but I have this sad feeling that I can't get past. It has only been a week and I know I have a long way to go but I was looking for some encouragement on how others may handle those feeling when this was all new to them. again...I don't regret this just need to get use to it. I wonder if I will ever be able to eat and have enough to really enjoy it! there it is....I bear my inner thoughts....HELP

It has only been a month since my surgery. (2/15) I haven't had a fill yet. I can eat.....trying to watch it but am really scared at this time. I am scared that I am going to eat like this all the time. I want this to work but seem to sabatoge myself at times. I just ate something I know that I shouldn't have. I actually snuck some chips to the back room. I am upset with myself. It is like it may be the last time I can eat some of these things. I used that excuse before the surgery. Guess I needed to confess! Looks kind of silly when I look at it but I am really concerned that I will be able to eat what I want after the fill.....better yet, I am scared to gain weight back before the fill. I SHOULD BE ABLE TO HAVE ALL THE WILL POWER I NEED TO AT LEAST GET THROUGH THIS TIME PERIOD!

thanks for the replies. It is like confessing....once it is done you have to move on! Dixiecharm one might think we were related! I am a self pay also and want this to work so bad. I know that I have to work at it as well and it isn't just going to happen. You are going to have a wonderful support group right at home. The Dr. told me I may gain some once I start eatting and not to be alarmed but I don't want to gain everything I lost!!! My fill will be at the end of the month and really am looking forward to the extra help. I read earlier about someone just dancing around feeling so much better and had such a wonderful attitude.....I WANT THAT! Went walking to get my mind off of the food. Helped for a bit until I smelled someone cooking smothered potatoes! LOL!!! I wish you and your husband all the best. As LeeInDe said..." Good luck to us!"

This definitely brought a smile to my face today! I was so upset yesterday and today I am spending it trying to find some clear broth that will satisfy me. I guess one of the best pieces of advice you guys gave was "get over it" in a kind manner! I don't want the life I had before where food ruled me.....But I must say just that the smell of Italian food last night brougth my sense of smell to a new height! Isn't it ashame to love food so much? I feel like I am going through a breakup with my lover!LOL! I look so forward checking this site daily and knowing that I am not in it alone makes it all possible!

I have been battling with this same things of telling or not telling. I don't know why I can't seem to tell my friends other than I feel ashamed that I couldn't do it myself. I am suppose to have more control over my life. I am suppose to be an overcomer. I guess that I need to be sure it is going to work before I start announcing it! doesn't that sound silly!

thank you so much for the words of encouragement. Just needed to let a few tears flow. I know it will get better just so impatient! There is strength in numbers and I am so glad to have found a place where I can voice what I truly feel with people that truly understand. It is good to know that I really am not in this alone. thanks again. sniff...I do feel better