Fat kids?

[TracyW 0]

I have two young children, my daughter is 4 and my son is 18 months, they are both normal weight. I am very affraid for them to be overweight, I have been very overweight since early childhood and now as an adult morbidly obese. The only way I could think to possibly keep them from being overweight was: never talk about myself being on a diet,never weighing myself(we don't own a scale), try not to snack when their around, my daughter does not know I have the band, if I look in the mirror I never say anything bad about myself in front of them, I either say nothing or I say something possitive even if I don't beleive it myself, I have put my daughter in gymnastics and now tap and ballet class, my son will start mygym soon. The way I feed them is pretty good most of the time with everything they should have and other things moderatly, I never offer food in a happy or sad situation, I never ask if they want seconds and I usually don't offer dessert unless we are out for a special occasion or if they ask for a snack I usually say yes unless its before dinner(its all they know). I asked their Dr. along time ago about giving something with artificial sweetner he said it was best not to, they are better off having a moderate amount of regular stuff then a lot of sugar free stuff, just one Dr.s opinion but I follow it, it works for us. This is a struggle I will have for the rest of my life even with the band, I am doing everything in my power not to pass on this horrible disease. TracyW

[mercedes 0]

I think Loopylou hit it on the head. Her brother is thin because he was not "controlled" by food.< /p>

When I think of what my mother could have done to help me this is my list.

#1 Never tell me I need a diet.

This tells a child that they ARE fat and so they will behave like a fat person. If I had a child that I thought was getting out of control with eating, I would NEVER tell them I knew it.

When they ask for food they "shouldn't" have, I would say "You can have some a little later". Chances are, they will go off and play and forget the craving and by saying "yes" you have not made them feel controlled or punished. You have postponed their craving and cravings go away if you're not concerned it's your last chance to have it.

Don't control with food. Many times when people say that I can't have something, it makes me obsess about it and sneak it so that I prove that they have no control over me.

#2 Don't ever tell your kids they have the chance of getting fat. Skinny people never considered they'd ever be fat. Don't we all remember when the first time was somebody told us we were fat and we believed them! I do, and I lived up to the belief. I look at the pics and think, "I was not fat then". Sad that I believed it.

The best thing my Mother could have done was put me on a diet w/out me knowing it.

Exercised w/out me knowing it was a weight thing.

My mother was a granola girl who grew all her own veggies and fruit and we rarely had sugar in our home. We had very healthy diets. I got fat on peanutbutter and honey mixed : ) I ate a lot of it.

[mercedes 0]

I think Loopylou hit it on the head. Her brother is thin because he was not "controlled" with food.< /p>

When I think of kids (me) & food these are my thoughts:

#1 Never tell kids that they need a diet or that they can't have something because it'll make them fatter.

This tells a child that they ARE fat and so they will behave like a fat person. If I had a child that I thought was getting out of control with eating, I would NEVER tell them I knew it. I'd try and make food a non issue. Help them forget about it by not talking about it.

When they ask for food they "shouldn't" have, I would/do say "Yes you can have some a little later". It's so much nicer than "no" eventhough you mean "no". Chances are, they will go off and play and forget the craving and by saying "yes, but later" you have not made them feel controlled or punished. You have postponed their craving and cravings go away if you're not concerned it's your last chance to have it.

Don't control with food. Many times when people say that I can't have something, it makes me obsess about it and sneak it so that I prove that they have no control over me.

#2 Don't ever tell your kids they have the chance of getting fat. Skinny people never considered they'd ever be fat. Don't we all remember when the first time was somebody told us we were fat and we believed them! I do, and I lived up to the belief once it was put in my head. I look at the pics and think, "I was not fat then". Sad that I believed it.

The best thing my Mother could have done was put me on a diet w/out me knowing it.

Exercised w/out me knowing it was a weight thing.

She could have kept my day too busy for over eating.

My mother was a granola girl who grew all her own veggies and fruit and we rarely had sugar in our home. She never deep fried anything and we never ate out. We had very healthy diets. I got fat on peanutbutter and honey mixed : ) I ate a lot of it.

I got fat on lots of healthy foods. I was just compulsive and self destructive.

I went on so many diets as a teen. Finally, when I was 21 I decided I would never "diet" again. I knew one thing, skinny people don't diet. I told myself I could have whatever I wanted, but like a skinny person, I'd only eat a little bit because that's all I wanted. I brain washed myself into believing I weighed 5lbs less, 5lbs less. 5lbs less. Until finally I was at 125 and I said over and over "I weigh 125." until that was the number that stuck in my head. I also stayed very busy working. I was able to stay thin for 6yrs until I got married....

My husband unknowingly made a grave mistake after just a few weeks of marriage by telling me I'd get fat if I ate what I was eating. He watched what I ate and I couldn't deal with that. He didn't mean to, he is a very nice person. He just had no clue that he'd married a food phsyco that needed to be free of any outside control when it came to food. A skinny person would have heard those same things and not believed them, why did I fall back into obsession?