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I am not embarrassed about my surgery! Are you?



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I've told a few close friends and my family. I work in the surgical profession and I just don't want to hear all the advice and feel like I'm under the microscope with my co-workers.

I see this as intensely private, it's something I'm doing for myself and it's really no one's business but mine.

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ok my turn... I'm going thru a special situation with my "friends". Most of them fell slave to the charlie (cocaine) in the last few years. As a result I don't talk to any of them much anymore. None of them are overweight and would understand anyway. No more whining about my weight, loss of friends, family stuff, whatever! I'm getting banded in less than a week and am so freakin' excited to turn my life around.

I tried to tell my mom. She expressed fear of losing her only child on the operating table as a result of a frivilous weight loss surgery that might not even work. So I let her think I cancelled or changed my mind. Another friend I discussed my wls consult with told me I wasn't big enough to have such a drastic surgery and just needed to eat lighter, so she wasn't very supportive either. My father, a health nut and life long fitness enthusiast, would not be supportive at all of such a procedure. Everyone would think I was MAD to have it done in Mexico. So I've decided to keep this just between me and my ultra supportive husband, who has seen my struggles with weight loss in the past years and thinks I would do very well with the band. He is as excited as I am.

I don't regret the decision to keep it a secret. It's a nice little juicy fact that only I know. People can be so judgemental about these things. Hell even Oprah is against them and she's fat AND my idol! (it's ok girl, ur entitled to ur opinion.) It's gonna be fantastic when everyone starts noticing the pounds peel off. I don't want others paying any attention to how much I eat, or whether I exercise all the time. I just want them to one day notice that I'm looking great. They'll be jealous I'm managing to get healthier, happier and hotter while they snort their miseries away in some dingy club every weekend. They'll want to know how I did it. They'll want to know my secret. But I'll never tell. HAHAHahahahaha

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Well said all! Yep, not embarressed, but like Kelli, I'm doing something for me for once and I need to focus on me with no distractions, imagined or otherwise. I expect I won't even get pats on the back as I lose as everyone has seen me do it before...I'm hoping they notice when I keep it off! I'm only ever embarressed when I gain it all back + and I'm determined that won't happen this time!!!

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I am embarrassed, embarrassed I ever let my self get to the point where I needed surgery to help me loose weight. Embarrassed at how little self control I had. Now, if they ask, I tell them. If they don't, hey don't ask don't tell. I am not however ashamed of my surgery.

Kandi

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ok my turn... I'm going thru a special situation with my "friends". Most of them fell slave to the charlie (cocaine) in the last few years. As a result I don't talk to any of them much anymore. None of them are overweight and would understand anyway. No more whining about my weight, loss of friends, family stuff, whatever! I'm getting banded in less than a week and am so freakin' excited to turn my life around.

I tried to tell my mom. She expressed fear of losing her only child on the operating table as a result of a frivilous weight loss surgery that might not even work. So I let her think I cancelled or changed my mind. Another friend I discussed my wls consult with told me I wasn't big enough to have such a drastic surgery and just needed to eat lighter, so she wasn't very supportive either. My father, a health nut and life long fitness enthusiast, would not be supportive at all of such a procedure. Everyone would think I was MAD to have it done in Mexico. So I've decided to keep this just between me and my ultra supportive husband, who has seen my struggles with weight loss in the past years and thinks I would do very well with the band. He is as excited as I am.

I don't regret the decision to keep it a secret. It's a nice little juicy fact that only I know. People can be so judgemental about these things. Hell even Oprah is against them and she's fat AND my idol! (it's ok girl, ur entitled to ur opinion.) It's gonna be fantastic when everyone starts noticing the pounds peel off. I don't want others paying any attention to how much I eat, or whether I exercise all the time. I just want them to one day notice that I'm looking great. They'll be jealous I'm managing to get healthier, happier and hotter while they snort their miseries away in some dingy club every weekend. They'll want to know how I did it. They'll want to know my secret. But I'll never tell. HAHAHahahahaha

WOW-I can def see why you wouldnt say anything. I tried to tell my mom and she at first was like you dont weight enought dont you have to weigh like 300 or more lbs I said no and thenshes like well why dont you just eat less and exercise and I said mom I have tried EVERY diet from the grapefruit diet to jenny kraig to having injections...so since then shes completely understood and has been super supportive...

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I told everyone about my surgery. Not only am I not private in regards to the surgery, I may be a bit invasive. It’s quite possible that I tell a lot of people way more than they actually want to know.<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>

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Six days ago, I would have said I am baffled as to why some people are so sensitive about discussing their surgery, but I think I understand better now. You see, I was diagnosed six days ago with ADHD. I’m 27 years old and have had it my entire life but never knew it. I’ve told some people about the disorder, but I will not tell my father. It’s not that I’m embarrassed because in reality, I’m relieved to know what on earth has been wrong with me all this time! I just know my father, and I know that discussing this with him will result in an argument to end all arguments. He will make me question myself, question my psychiatrist, and question every decision I’ve ever made in my life. I don’t need that kind of stress or pressure and I certainly don’t intend to invite it by bringing the subject up. <o:p></o:p>

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Likewise, I think there are a lot of people who are quite certain they risk the exact same scenario should they bring up their surgery. Many of them are absolutely right. I’m lucky in that my family generally understands why I had the surgery and those who don’t are such a minority that they dare not state their opinion. Not everyone is this lucky. No one deserves or wants this kind of conflict in their life.

My heart goes out to everyone out there who has a good reason for not divulging their decision to have lapband surgery to those around them. They made a powerful and amazing decision for themselves- congratulations on that J

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I share with whom I want to share. However my supervisor didn't respect my privacy and has shared it with a few people. It is my decision who know and who I want to tell. Not hers.

I am proud of my decision, and have only positive things to say about it!

Keri

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Am I a private person, yes very. Am I embarrassed about my surgey, no way! I was more embarrassed carryng around my fat a*s!!

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I look at it this way.... I needed help to become healthier... the band is the help I need.... Do I tell everyone I meet?.. nope... When I started this only my husband knew... I did get a little nervous about having surgery and possibly dying on the table so I told my kids still at home about the surgery... otherwise, I have not told my co-workers, supervisor, other family, etc., to include my oldest child and my mother!..... While I don't tell people close to me, I have no problems telling complete strangers about my band! :)

Am I embarrassed? No way! This is the best thing I've done for myself!

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I wouldn't tell people about other gall bladder surgery or about kidney stone surgery, why would I share this?

Actually, I was out with family and my aunt, who does know about the surgery, made a comment that made me feel obligated to share my surgery with my cousins. So I told them. One just walked away and didn't say anything. The other one said "That seems unhealthy to lose that much weight all at once." Then walked away. Interesting... reminds me why I don't tell people. I'm not ashamed, but I don't feel like I need to justify myself either. I'm proud of my weight loss and my journey... if other people aren't going to be proud then there's no reason to share it with them.

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ok... so ya.. I wanted to give 100% honest answer so before reading this I didn't read anyone else response so I am probably in the minority... Or not.

NO I AM NOT embarassed with my surgery but.. Why do they need to know? I dunno ... The only people that know currently or have been told directly from me is my family and in laws and my 1 close friend Michele.. None of my coworkers know unless they have a clue.

Someone a few months ago said "Did you have the lapband?" who also happens to be the Human Resourcese person... I told her... My business is mine .... " thanks" so I dont think she like that.

I chose to keep my business mine. How would benefit at work from someone knowing I had a silicon implant to restrict my intake of food?

I am proud of everyone who can say "YES I HAD THE LAP BAND" but some of us cannot... or don't feel the need to announce it or care to. Either way we will all get to goal.

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****DISCLAIMER - I am just a regular person, who is a regular poster, on a regular forum for Lap Band surgery who is just sharing a thought in a regular way...no offense is meant towards anyone

So, as I have been reading and posting today I have been thinking... am I embarrassed to have had this surgery? No way!

I was embarrassed when I couldn't fit comfortably in my seat on the airplane, when my thighs rubbed so much they were raw, when the skin folds on my body had an odor (you know what I mean)....

those are the embarrassing things and honestly my surgery is not in anyway something to be ashamed of.

I am honest always regarding my weight loss and my surgery - it doesn't matter who it is I am sharing it with - and this is my personal choice - if you do not want to tell anyone that is fine too and that doesn't mean you are embarrassed by it just you are more reserved for your reasons than I am.

Plus, I always think back to when Star Jones had surgery but she wouldn't say she had surgery.... I know I was wondering why she didn't.

So yes, I am proud to have had my surgery - I have no issues with it and if someone does well it is no different than any other aspect of life - people will have different thoughts, feelings and their own insecurities and issues - who gives a rats a$$ :thumbup:

I first and foremost want to say I DONT GIVE A FLYING DONKEYS BUTT what anyone cares about me... My weight and how I look. I don't ANNOUNCE my weight or my surgery because.. ummy why who cares? hahah No one cares it's all mental about who u think who cares haha.

pretty popular topic as a new thread seems to pop up each day.

not embarrassed - just private. no shame, not secretive, was never concerned about peoples opinions. i was just banded w/my husband who is ULTRA private - he wanted this kept to ourselves and so we did. i've learned a lot about discretion being with him over 10yrs - it's helped in other areas, where i have been a chatty kathy in the past.

i shared my banding w/my family after 6 months - i'm sure if i told any of my friends, colleagues, other family members...they would be supportive. my oldest brother got banded after seeing me and hubby a few months out.....we were the unfortunate ones in a family of 6 that had that "fat gene". i was glad to help & offer advice - as far as others go; i watch what i eat & exercise & that is no lie.

pretty personal topic - i will say i'm a little over people saying those who don't disclose are secretive or deceptive. i did a overhaul of my diet & re-engaged with my athletic side - the band didn't do that for me; it assisted.

Lulu you're on my top list of posters. I agree with almost 100% of what you say and I am with you on this. I may not be the best at not being a chatty cathy but my DH is ... I have learned that not everyone needs to know or cares to know.... I just figure it's none of their business and have taken my Dh's view on it... They just dont need to know

I am not embarrassed. However, I decided to only tell the people I care for. No one needs to know my business or my struggle! This surgery is not the easy way out at all. I bust my booty at the gym and fight the cravings of a big juicy burger lol. My surgery does not drag me to the gym or tells me "hey dont you dare eat that sexy burger". I do.
Wow! It is really wonderful to see such a great and positive response from each and every one of you guys :mellow:

I guess it really is a personal decision and some of us are more personal than others and some less than than others.

I am the happiest to see that not one person felt embarrassed about the surger.

Regardless if we keep our surgery close to our hearts or Celebrate it loudly and verbally we all seem to be very proud of our decisions :)

I am not Embarrassed by my surger... I just don't think it's anyones business wtf I have dont with my life, my health, my weigth. I will continue to just avoid the conversation that might conclude that I have had WLS. I have lost 75lbs so far and for the most part no one has really said alot to make a big scene out of it. Luckily I only work with a few people and probaly wont have to undergo the scrutunity of the public ..

I am not embarrassed. I am just not pulic. I have 2 VERY close friends that know. and ALL my family know an all are supporitve.

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I'm not embarrassed and I tell a lot of people about it. I think I'm doing great, so I feel totally proud of myself!

Like the other pp said, I can do things I could never do before. I had the nicest flight last week and I fit well in the seats and was not squished and uncomfortable. I want to travel more now and just got tickets to go to Florida on spring break!

I like to dance and want to go out dancing! I'll see if friends want to go this weekend!

I feel sexy, so I went online and got myself 3 dates this week!

So yeah, what's to be embarrassed about??

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Am I embarrassed about my surgery? Not no, but HELL NO!! I'm not as young as most of you that have posted on this topic (I'm 52) but quite the contrary, I'm proud of the decision that I made to take this step. I wasn't a FAT kid. I was always in GREAT shape and did not start putting weight on until is was in my early 30's. Like most of you I started the yo-yo dieting at that time. Weighed 225 lbs at 32 years old and yo-yo;d my way up to a svelte 376 lbs!!!

What I was embarrassed about was not fitting in a restaurant booth, an airplane seat, barely being able to wipe my fat ass and a mirad of other things. I love my kids and grandkids with a passion that is unmeasurable. And I know that I was getting SO BIG, that my size would embarrass the two older grandkids when we were out in public (the two oldest are 12 and 13 yo).

Getting banded is the very best thing that I have ever done for myself. I knew that I couldn't do it by just dieting. So when people ask me about my weight loss and how I have acheived what I have so far, I TELL THEM. If the person who asks happens to be overweight themselves, I try to share all that I can with them.

70 lbs lost so far and only 90 lbs more to go!! I hope and pray that you all have a GREAT New Year!!! God bless you all. Spike

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I'm not embarrassed that I'm having surgery. However, I wouldnt've told everyone in my family. The only people I told other than my parents were my best friend and my wonderful grandmother who just passed away last month. My mom went ahead and told everyone else after I told her not to do it. Ever since people found out I was having it they badger me about when I'm having it, how much weight do I think I'll lose, how great it's gonna be, how much better my life will be, etc etc etc. I realize they care about me and everything, but I really would like to be left alone. I know for a fact I'm going to have my family all over me about my weight even more now because I won't lose as fast as my mom and aunt did with their gastric bypasses.

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