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What is the rudest thing someone has said to you?!?!



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I never realized what a toll their treatment took on me until I did break away, we have to live for ourselves, no one else is going to value us if we don't value ourselves! So to hell with 'em, :w00t:

Amen, sister.

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I did not tell my family I had surgery. My mom has made numerous negative comments about my friends who have had WLS. I would never hear the end of it if they knew.

In 2005 everything I had, including my job, was destroyed by hurricane Rita. I ended up moving 6 hours away from my mom. As hard as it is to be away from all my friends, and my support, it has been wonderful to be this far away from my mom. I hardly ever cry since moving away, and I use to cry all the time about the way I was treated.

I agree with everyone about breaking away from family who have treated us bad. My Mom was always the same way. She treated me horrible, worse than anyone else ever has. She made me feel so bad one day when I was at her house, that I just walked out the door without saying a word and left. I didn't speak to her for 2 months. I guess she had a lot of time to think during that split. And one day she showed up at my house to make up. We talk now, but we will never be really close. She doesn't say anything anymore about my weight, except to ask me how much I have lost since having surgery.

I remember once, this guy I really loved dumped me, and I was really upset. She told me if I would lose some weight and get a make over that I would find someone. She never thought I'd find anyone else. So imagine her surprise when I met my husband and he loved me just the way I was. We got engaged 5 months after meeting. I think she is still surprised that I found someone to love me.

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While shopping in Walmart about 2 months ago, this old lady walked up to me, looked me up and down and said, "you look like a good cook, do you know the recipe for cabbage wraps". It really hurt my feelings, especially since I really can't cook well at all. :w00t:

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OMG, Gina I am so sorry your mother treated you that way. I am so saddened when I hear stories of people whose mother's of all people were so cruel. I guess because I had such a special relationship with my mom. She was always worried about my weight, but she was never ashamed of me. I miss her so. She passed away in August. But, again, I am so, so sorry this happened to you. Bless you.

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I had a boyfriend in college (that I really loved) that told me he couldn't be with me anymore because I was too heavy. Then he sarted dating a girl that looked like she was from under a rock- the chick even had a unibrow, a mustache and braces (not that there is anything wrong with braces)! I was really cute and fun in college!

What the hell! The funny thing was, he wasn't handsome at all, and I thought I was doing him a favor:laugh:~!

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i find it absolutely amazing how many of our mom's have said the rudest things...

i was thin until my mid-20's. after i moved out of my parents house, i started gaining weight. i can remember this day like it was yesterday...

my mom called me... she NEVER calls. she said she wanted to talk to me about something in case my friends were too embarrassed to. she said "kris, you're fat and i think you need to start exercising and join Jenny Craig". i was SO hurt that i wrote her a nasty letter and refused to talk to her for a few months.

she may have meant well but she really hurt my feelings. i ended up telling her that for once in her life, if she has nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all. i own a mirror... i know what i look like.

since then, she has been VERY supportive. she has never said another negative thing about my weight. unfortunately, we had another big fight 1.5 years ago that has nothing to do with weight. i had planned my surgery and was going to have my brother go with me. my sister asked me to please talk to mom about it.

i did and i asked my mom if she would go with me. we both cried... about the past, about the present and the future.

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My grandmother was the one who always managed to make me feel like something you would scape off the bottom of your shoe. Over the years, she has said so many things, I don't know which ones to pick, but I'd be typing for days if I listed them all.

When I was 10, I was 5'6", about 150, and in a C cup. She told me, in all seriousness "Honey, if you lost half your body weight you might almost be pretty." Lets ignore the fact that 5'6" and 75 pounds is skeletal, possibly dead, but she was my height and wore 3 sizes bigger than me! WTF???

We always had family vacation, where my sister and I, my parents, my aunt and uncle, their two daughters and my grandparents all spent a week at the beach. I brought a friend, and my grandmother called me out in front of EVERYBODY, bcause my friend and I were going to share a peach. A Peach, not a peach PIE, one damn peach!

I had just broken up with my first serious college boyfrined, and my grandmother told me "you need to go beg him back, he's way better than anyone like you can get." This was the guy that threw me out 3rd story windows, beat me on a regular basis, and stabbed a hunting knife to the hilt into my thigh, giving me permanent nerve damage, thank you very much!

You know, you hear the same things for long enough from someone who is supposed to love and support you, you start to think it's true. I didn't realize how screwed up I'd allowed her to make me, til I moved across a time zone and at least one state line. She died this summer, and I cried, not because I miss her or loved her, but every other family member spoke at her funeral saying what a wonderful, loving, amazing woman she had been, and I never met that woman. I met the woman who, when I lost 30 pounds one summer, said "that's a good start, only 150 left." I would have weighed 60 pounds.

Edited by 2b-banded
typos!

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Well, this one isn't rude at all but I was rather shocked about it. It seems like it is always family that gets us more than anyone else. This one goes the opposite direction . . . from the child to the mother.

Since banding I went from 225 to 144 on a 5'3 frame (big difference on a short girl) in a little over 9 months. I am pretty much at goal now for all intents and purposes (3 - 4 pounds from a "normal" BMI).

When I was about 150 or so, I asked my 16 year old son (who never said a word about weight loss and doesn't know about my band) "have you noticed that I lost a little weight this year?"

His answer, "No, you look the same to me" . . . I was shocked. What is worse, I can read my son and he wasn't yanking my chain or playing with me, he honestly never even noticed.

My feelings were really hurt at the time. I think this was because I changed everything about the way I look and for him not to not even notice this transition . . . I must be about as important as the wallpaper in the bathroom. Everyone in the world, even the teller at the bank who I see maybe 1-2 times a year since the advent of online banking, seemed to notice . . . but my own child . . . nada.

Anyways, I got over it. I have a teenager at home and I know he loves me . . . specially when he needs money or the latest xbox 360 game, lol. He is a good kid, never been a problem. It is just hard for a mom to remember being her childs whole world and later becoming her childs afterthought.

I think most teenagers worlds revolve around themselves for a few brief years and then they come back to appreciate you once they start college. At least I hope this is true . . . :0)

Edited by HeatherO

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Well, this one isn't rude at all but I was rather shocked about it. It seems like it is always family that gets us more than anyone else. This one goes the opposite direction . . . from the child to the mother.

Since banding I went from 225 to 144 on a 5'3 frame (big difference on a short girl) in a little over 9 months. I am pretty much at goal now for all intents and purposes (3 - 4 pounds from a "normal" BMI).

When I was about 150 or so, I asked my 16 year old son (who never said a word about weight loss and doesn't know about my band) "have you noticed that I lost a little weight this year?"

His answer, "No, you look the same to me" . . . I was shocked. What is worse, I can read my son and he wasn't yanking my chain or playing with me, he honestly never even noticed.

My feelings were really hurt at the time. I think this was because I changed everything about the way I look and for him not to not even notice this transition . . . I must be about as important as the wallpaper in the bathroom. Everyone in the world, even the teller at the bank who I see maybe 1-2 times a year since the advent of online banking, seemed to notice . . . but my own child . . . nada.

Anyways, I got over it. I have a teenager at home and I know he loves me . . . specially when he needs money or the latest xbox 360 game, lol. He is a good kid, never been a problem. It is just hard for a mom to remember being her childs whole world and later becoming her childs afterthought.

I think most teenagers worlds revolve around themselves for a few brief years and then they come back to appreciate you once they start college. At least I hope this is true . . . :0)

HeatherO, I think I would have been flattered if one of my kids said that, I think he probably sees you as "Mom" and never thought of you as "fat" in the first place. I guess love is blind, lol :)

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HeatherO, I think I would have been flattered if one of my kids said that, I think he probably sees you as "Mom" and never thought of you as "fat" in the first place. I guess love is blind, lol :)

What a great point, lol. It would have been a lot worse if he was bothered by how I looked in the first place but I've always been just mom. I never thought about it that way before.

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I think him not noticing has a lot to do with him just being male. My husband is the same way. I have lost almost 40 pounds and he hasn't said much at all. He only noticed the other day because the pants I had on were falling off. He wouldn't have noticed any other way. My feelings have been hurt as well, but I just keep reminding myself that males are that way, they don't notice much. I bet if you had a teenage daughter, she would have noticed!

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The rudest thing any one has said to me was when my ex-wife who at one time was over 300 lbs and I still loved her for who she was, had the gastric bypass surgery and lost a whole lot of weight. She got down to like 105lbs and told me that she didn’t want to be with me because I was fat and wanted a Divorce. (What do you think about that?)

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thats awful. I guess she could lose weight but couldn't change being a mean person.

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