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Julie, Sorry I thought you had said she was married before. My DD had her bridesmaids wear a black cocktail length dress of their choosing and then she wanted them to wear the same shoes. they got the kind you have dyed and she had them wear pink shoes. They looked great and they both bought dresses they loved that they can wear again. I thought it was a great idea. DD did try on my dress but she only ended up using my veil and remaking it. Good luck in your planning.

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Melissa...try not to let what happened in your past affect the future you want for yourself. There's a saying: "There is a reason people from your past did not make it into your future". Try not to let your abuser continue to make you a victim any longer. He's just not worth it. But, YOU are worth it and need to take the power and control back.

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OK...crooked bunny cake is made. One ear is larger than the other. I didn't want him to feel bad so I told him the story of my one boob being bigger than the other. Now he has the smile back on his face. See?

I love it!.......and your story too!!!

Happy Easter Everyone!!!!!

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Great, my DD has not been married before... Neither has the finacee....... Just both are unwed parents....with unfortunate stories to tell about how horrible people can be t each other... I think that's why they are going so fast.. They are both starved for the affection they didn't get with the other parent of their child....

DD is not a fancy girl.... wants something quite simple... She is a very big heavy metal music fan and loves Metallica.... Wouldn't put it past her to have attendants wear Metallica t-shirts.....LOL...... Actually she wants her attendants to wear nice black coctail length dresses that they can wear again... Nothing frilly or fancy.... No tuxes for the guys.... She's debating about her own dress.... Not sure if she wants a traditional wedding gown.... I'm hoping to convince her to take mine and have it made into something she would like... It's enough to big that there is lots of material to work with.... We'll see what happens.... I'm just glad we have 6 months and not 2... I really want them to do the counseling with Pastor.... I have to be so careful about what I say... She feels my criticism so easily... And I'm know for giving my opinions freely with her..... gotta watch that and not steal her happiness from her........

Julie...I love the idea of little black dresses that these girls can get use out of again. I have soooooooooooo many bridesmaid dresses stored in the closet in the basement that cost so much never to be worn again. I should go down and look at them just for old time sake. Some are so bad. Pleats and butt bows and poofs and sparkely things. I love the idea of being practical.

Well, getting pretty excited to see the boys make their trip into town. (Our local National Guard unit). A lot of these kids are friends of both our DS's, went to school with them, served with DS the first time in Iraq. Woke up at 4am and couldn't get back to sleep just too excited. We are so happy they will be on home turf now and also hoping this is it for deployments out of our unit. At least every one of them are coming home this time alive and with absolutely no injuries. :bored:

My salads are made for tomorrow. DH and I are going out for lunch (very rare occurance) after we wave the boys in and then out to our University for the coming home ceremony. After that, going out to dinner with friends. Looking forward to it all.

Hope you all have a great weekend whether it is spent with family or friends. Happy Easter

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OK...crooked bunny cake is made. One ear is larger than the other. I didn't want him to feel bad so I told him the story of my one boob being bigger than the other. Now he has the smile back on his face. See?

I love the cakes they are so adorable :bored:

Melissa. Abuse is a huge piece of why many of us eat. We layer fat around ourselves to protect us. We eat our emotions. Stuff your feelings, stuff your face.

Taking control of your food is a way of taking your life back from the abuser and saying you will not control me or my emotions or my life anymore.

I suggest you tell your son what happened to you. Keep it simple. Don't go into all the gory details. Tell him it's OK for him to contact his father but you can't be involved in it. Don't take it personally. His father may be a different person for him than he was for you. If not, your son will find out for himself. It is not a betrayal of you.

You can do this. Many of us have various forms of abuse in our background. I found myself only able to lose up to a certain point also, before the band. It was almost as if being thin would make me too attractive and might attract an abuser into my life. ALthough my second husband is not an abuser, there are difficuloties in our marriage where I did not take care of myself and let him do things that left me carrying debt and being the main financial support. I had to stand up for myself and retake control of my life. There are a lot of things I know I can't rely on him for, and I had to once again accept total responsibility for my own life like I did after my first husband left. As much as he loves me, and he does, he cannot be the source of my emotional well-being. As I've taken charge of my own physical, spiritual, mental, financial, emotional and sexual well-being, my ability to deal with my food has also improved.

As I've let go of trying to fix and heal all the people in my life (particularly relatives) and put them in God's hands, I've gotten healthier. That's a process that takes time and years. You can't control your son's relationship with his father. Let go and let God.Everybody's giving you great food advice. All I have to add is, go back and read what I wrote about reflux, if you need a slight refill and you don't want the pbing and reflux back. It might make a difference.

Cheri

Thank you for all your advice I really need to put my past away and keep it in God's hands

Melissa...try not to let what happened in your past affect the future you want for yourself. There's a saying: "There is a reason people from your past did not make it into your future". Try not to let your abuser continue to make you a victim any longer. He's just not worth it. But, YOU are worth it and need to take the power and control back.

I think I have seen that quote before and it is so true.

Thanks to everyone for the advice i am going to get my shakes and a new blender mine stinks it leaks and jump back in to the exercise I am taking 3 boys to the pool in a few so that will be fun they can jump on the diving boards and I can swim this week is about me and getting my control back. If I did not mention I am off this week for my son's spring break so time to refocus on myself and my plans.

Love you guys talk to you later.

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Thank you veteran bandsters! Yes, this did help me feel better. most of the liquid I'm getting in is Protein Drinks. I'm feeling better today, and was able to get in the first 6 ounces of the day without the gas pains, so that for me is wonderful! Thank you again for being here for us newbies!

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Good Morning Gang...

Melissa - We can love someone before we meet them - That's why when we do meet in person - it's like seeing an old friend you haven't seen in a while...

Yep girls Melissa sounds like a teenager :0) - Very Very nice voice..

Yep this next week is about you and planing.

Jewel - Have fun with your bro ;0) Congrats on the 40 lbs!!!

Julie - Congrats on DD engagement - I agree glad it's 6 months away - who knows this may work - we will all keep our fingers crossed and prayers - Sorry for the snow - it's 80 here ;o)

Karen - Love the cake - you are the hostess with the mostess.. Since it's just me and Andrew this yr for Easter - no eggs or cakes - got him a card - may get him a little Easter basket today - Sent the other family cards (girls got some $$$ and thongs (undie) she wanted them DIL wasn't thrilled with the idea of her 15 yr old wearing them - but hell she's not boy crazy and they are the undies of most kids now a days - so her LaLa got her some ;0)

Clag - Yep as each day passes you are going to feel better - I was operated on Tuesday and by Friday I was feeling great and I was 52 ..

And like Phyl said - we forget - it's like having a baby - after a whiile you forget the pain - but I remember the shoulder gas pain -

I made homemade broth - it taste so much better than the canned stuff...

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Hi girls, I'm taking a break from all my cooking and baking and planning....It's crazy here... DD keeps calling wanting to talk about the wedding as she is so excited... but I'm so busy don't have time to talk... Can we wait til tomorrow, Honey??? She said yes......

I've got the Easter Breakfast at church all organized and ready, but with the big power outage we had yesterday, half the state is out.... We are fine here in our town, but the rural areas are still out.. Our little church is in the country 17 miles from here... No power.. they are out there now trying to hook up gererators and such so we can have church and do breakfast... The sump pumps quit working so we have Water in the basement too... DH is out there now helping get things going... We also have a big funeral on Monday there, expecting 200 people... I'm having to do lots for that, too... One gal is doing the ham and scalloped potatoes, and I'm in charge of salads and dessert... It takes plenty of food for 200.... and we are just a little congregation.. There are only 13 of us ladies to do the work.... and I'm about the third youngest!!!!! One is 92 and one is 80 and most in their 60's and 70's.. But we'll get it done... I'm just trying to do three things at once as I have dinner for the family tomorrow, too...... I'm getting most of my stuff done... Having ham and sr cream potates, veggies, lettuce salad, Pasta salad, Buns, homemade strawberry ice cream and cupcakes.. I made these cute little cut out rice krispie bars... did egg shapes and then put different colors of white chocolate on top with sprinkles... Tada....... Easter eggs!!!! Kids will like them and are better than candy..... I have to frost the cupcakes and then put the salads together and I'm done... Don't know what I will give DH for supper... Maybe we will have to go out.... Oh, and I made a big hotdish to take to the family of the friend who dies, too... Just busy busy.... at least no pain right now and I did sleep in my bed last night... Had to get up at 3:00 and take another pain pill and get a cold pack, but managed to go back to sleep.. Felt good to be in the bed.....

Apples, enjoy your day.....sounds great.....

Janet, you and Andrew have each other and that counts for alot.....

Melissa, I'm hearing you sounding better.... this is good.. You are going to do just fine.. I'm doing all the wrong things today, but just not letting it bother me as I know it is short lived... Now I have a wedding to look presentable for... Gotta really get in gear now..... Maybe Monday!!!!

Great, DD is thinking maybe silver as an added touch to her black.... sounds pretty.... When do you leave on your trip???

Judy, where are you girl...??? Haven't heard from you for a bit...

All of you others I hope are out doing fun things getting ready for a nice Sunday... Jodi, are you resting up from all the festivities... Oh, that's right you can't post today... Well, anyway just want all to be happy and safe.... Take care....love to all......... Julie

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OK Friends..got a call from youngest in Atlanta. He just got out of surgery. Called his dad when we were having lunch. Was loud in the restaurant so DH stepped outside. He has been having a difficult time with kidney stones the last few months. Anyway...yesterday he was at his bank and went down. Ambulance trip to hospital and they had to go into the kidney to remove a mega-sized stone and they found infection in the kidney. Doc stated he would need to do kidney removal if anti-biotic does not kick it.

This just sounds so drastic. And, DH did not THINK to ask what hospital he is in. Gotta see in the next couple of hours if I can track him down through friends. I have tried and tried his phone in the last hour but no answer. I imagine he is out of it if he just got our of surgery. I DETEST that I have passed this on to my boys.

Anyway, those who say prayers, please pray that he does not lose that kidney. Thanks for listening. Love you guys

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Oh Karen, my thoughts and prayers are going out for you and your son. I had no idea kidney stones could get that big or be that serious. I bet you are going crazy with your baby in a hospital, you not sure where, etc. Are you going to try and fly down there? I pray that infection clears up in a hurry.

Julie, I leave on my trip on Monday. Enjoy that your DD wants to talk to you so much about her wedding. Keep those lines of communication open so you can learn all you can about the fiance and be a big part of her big day. I think my doing that I grew even closer to my DD during the planning etc. She felt she could come to me for anything good and bad.

Hope every one has a blessed Easter. I am taking my grandma to my church tomorrow (she won't like it as it's not Lutheran but wants to go) and then we will all go to my in laws for Easter dinner. Not sure what to wear, the new skirt and blouse I got for the rehersal dinner, or some new stuff I just got at Ann Taylor Loft. LOL I just went there this morning and got some great stuff on clearance for $4.88 each!! You know how I love that store and for such a bargain all the more!

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OK Friends..got a call from youngest in Atlanta. He just got out of surgery. Called his dad when we were having lunch. Was loud in the restaurant so DH stepped outside. He has been having a difficult time with kidney stones the last few months. Anyway...yesterday he was at his bank and went down. Ambulance trip to hospital and they had to go into the kidney to remove a mega-sized stone and they found infection in the kidney. Doc stated he would need to do kidney removal if anti-biotic does not kick it.

This just sounds so drastic. And, DH did not THINK to ask what hospital he is in. Gotta see in the next couple of hours if I can track him down through friends. I have tried and tried his phone in the last hour but no answer. I imagine he is out of it if he just got our of surgery. I DETEST that I have passed this on to my boys.

Anyway, those who say prayers, please pray that he does not lose that kidney. Thanks for listening. Love you guys

My thoughts and prayers are with your son and your family. I pray the kidney removal is the very last resort. that does seem drastic

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Karen, my prayers are said................ for him and you and DH..... How horrible to be so far away and feel helpless.... You will find him..... and he will be okay.. God's hands are strong and will hold him when you can't.. Let us know when you find him... Are you thinking of flying out?? Take care now and stay strong... This is not your fault, you know... It's unfortunate that your sons have this kidney thing, too, but it's not your fault... I'm thinking of you and wishing the best for your son..... Keep in touch..

Great, your grandma will just be happy to be with you I'm sure... Have a nice day..... and a great trip.... you are the luckiest shopper.... I never find those bargains... But I don't look much either....

Julie

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OK Friends..got a call from youngest in Atlanta. He just got out of surgery. Called his dad when we were having lunch. Was loud in the restaurant so DH stepped outside. He has been having a difficult time with kidney stones the last few months. Anyway...yesterday he was at his bank and went down. Ambulance trip to hospital and they had to go into the kidney to remove a mega-sized stone and they found infection in the kidney. Doc stated he would need to do kidney removal if anti-biotic does not kick it.

This just sounds so drastic. And, DH did not THINK to ask what hospital he is in. Gotta see in the next couple of hours if I can track him down through friends. I have tried and tried his phone in the last hour but no answer. I imagine he is out of it if he just got our of surgery. I DETEST that I have passed this on to my boys.

Anyway, those who say prayers, please pray that he does not lose that kidney. Thanks for listening. Love you guys

Oh, my!! Pretty drastic to face possible kidney removal at such a young age. Praying that he responds quickly and completely to the antibiotic and that is not necessary.

Hugs, Karen!!

It is NOT your fault!

Oh Karen, my thoughts and prayers are going out for you and your son. I had no idea kidney stones could get that big or be that serious. I bet you are going crazy with your baby in a hospital, you not sure where, etc. Are you going to try and fly down there? I pray that infection clears up in a hurry.

Julie, I leave on my trip on Monday. Enjoy that your DD wants to talk to you so much about her wedding. Keep those lines of communication open so you can learn all you can about the fiance and be a big part of her big day. I think my doing that I grew even closer to my DD during the planning etc. She felt she could come to me for anything good and bad.

Hope every one has a blessed Easter. I am taking my grandma to my church tomorrow (she won't like it as it's not Lutheran but wants to go) and then we will all go to my in laws for Easter dinner. Not sure what to wear, the new skirt and blouse I got for the rehearsal dinner, or some new stuff I just got at Ann Taylor Loft. LOL I just went there this morning and got some great stuff on clearance for $4.88 each!! You know how I love that store and for such a bargain all the more!

Boy! You sure have a knack for finding the bargains!!

You'll look GREAT, I'm sure!

Is there an Easter Bonnet in this picture??

Julie, You are SOOOO busy!! Hope everything goes smoothly for you!

Out to dinner with two couples we graduated high school with tonight. One passing through Palm Springs, the otehr couple lives up in the mountains above Palm Springs. Should be fun, but wish I was feeling better... Lots of aches and pains today and praying I'm not coming down with something. Chills, dry lips... like maybe a slight fever. Took my BP at Walmart this afternoon and it was 87/57!! I think I need my BP meds cut back again!!

I'm taking too many!

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Update....talked to DS. Not making much sense. Must be the meds. They are transferring him to another facility. Fever is coming down. Does not make sense what first doc said about kidney removal. ER doc is one that said . I am thinking he doesn't know crap. Better off at another hospital. Most likely will fly out tomorrow. Feeling better now that fever is down. I have a feeling this will all be fine. Will keep up with you all and let you know

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Hi all~ kinda of a fly by post. Glanced the posts and just have to comment on a couple real quick.

Apples~hugs. I am praying DS is ok. A nephrectomy sounds so radical for an infection. Did they do a CT scan or just xray/ultrasound to find stone? I am sure he will be happy to have you there to care for him. Safe travels if you go. Wishing him a speedy recovery!

Julie~OMW............. A wedding!!!! You were serious about needing a MOB dress! WOW. Congrats! All we want is our kids to be happy- maybe this is her knight. Hope so!

Happy Easter everyone!

peasout..Laura

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