I'm here to help...

[ifyourstomachoffendsyou 1]

Sharpeis are cute.

[Great2BThin 5]

Lori, you are expected to rescue your grandmother, and be there for your mother and sisters while getting nothing in return and you used to do it and then feel awful because you were then excluded. That's right in the codependent family of behaviors. Enabling is one of the chief characteristics of codependency. We do for others what they ought to do for themselves. We are the soft pillow between their head and a brick wall. We hinder trying to help. We're all guilty.

One of the things I'm proud of this group for is that we tell it like it is to people on this band. Maybe it's easier in cyberspace but it's good practice for real life.

Cheri

Hmm, interesting and so true. But I don't do it anymore so maybe I am growing and learning. The Boundaries thing has really helped. Now I do what I want for my Grandma and stand up to my sisters and mom and am feeling much better about myself. This board is good 'practice'.

Good, I'll be a cute shar-pei! LOL

[Charlene K 1]

I forgot to tell y'all I went to the gastro dr to schedule a colonoscopy.....it has been five years. Two new things......the new prep is two six ounce bottles of sweet stuff. You drink them with two glasses of Water twelve hours apart and five hours before the colonoscopy. So, drinking the gallon thing is only an option......YAY! Also, the new government guidelines are you only need a colonoscopy every five years if you have had polyps in your immediate family or colon cancer.........ten years for all others. I also showed the doctor the pics that Dr. Davis took of my adhesions. He was amazed. He said he won't forget that picture. I am scheduling the test for next month. DH will be too busy the next few weeks to take me.

Julie, I can't get you off of my mind.......Praying every time I think of you!

[sndycnrd 1]

Melissa, Good for you! Starting a dialog with DH is right where you need to be right now. Things will never change if we don't ask for it. Give him a couple of days and try to discus it again. Your glucose seems to be in tight control. Way to go! I expectred much worse because of the way you describe your eating. I saved your email address. Mine is frankc223@comcast.net. Since we are the only diabetics we won't junk up the board with talk of sugar levels.

I hope to hear something about Julie soon.

Arlene, getting those fills is so exciting. I hope you can post some pictures. I don't know if I mentioned it but my TT is scheduled for mid May. I am getting excited. If that goes well I may look into some face and neck work.

Cheri, you described me to a T. The only thing with me is after I do for everyone, I get angry at myself and the situation. That progresses into guilt over the anger and then depression. I know the cycle well. Now.............if I could only break it.

[IndioGirl55 32]

Good Evening Gang

Hugs & Prayers for Julie !!! One on my #7 is having her band removed too - partial erosion..

Melissa - Hugs on fight w/DH - but good that you did talk about it- I know that w/my own DH - - on needing a fill - if you eat 4 oz of hard Protein are you physically full... That's the test IMHO.. I think we all eat to a degree softer foods so that we can consume more food - not just junk but veggie too. Take tiny bites chew well and eat slowly and then sit and thing about your stomach - does your pouch feel full.. This doesn't mean you aren't still going to be hungry but your stomach is actually full.. Try it and let me know - OMG my post was really bad spelling ;0) I was too tired to spell ck LOL - I think you have to find out the reason you are killing yourself before you can get better - what's inside you making you eat things you know you shouldn't - I am praying that this shrink will be able to help you get to the bottom of your issues.. Hugs Hugs Hugs..

Cheri - Co-dependency - I truly applied it to our relationships w/an alcoholic or drug person - but I see where it can affect other areas of our lives - I can't say I am a pple pleaser - Yes I like to make pple feel good - but not to the point of putting myself 2nd.. I have taken care of so many pple in my life that IMHO it's my time.. I'm done raising kids putting myself 2nd having controlling pple in my life and boyfriends who were addicted to drugs - hell my xdh was a rescuer - but the problem was I didn't need rescuing - he might have thought I did but - I sure in the hell wasn't helpless and I think this is why the marriage didn't last

Like Melissa I truly believe that my eating was my control - it's what I did for me after doing for everyone else - Only other pple who have this issue understand - I know my trainer would say - why when you know it's killing you - I think we just put our heads in the sand - and after a while it's just to hard to think about losing the weight - ie this is where the band comes in play to help - but it's not the magic cure all - it's only a tool to help us - as I alway say the real work is up to us.. food is our drug of choice and a non food addict really just doesn't understand this.. It's what I controlled when I had no control over all that was going on in my life..

Lori - I am glad you are standing up for you... I love the pic on fb of your GM holding her GGDGD great great darling grand daughter lo)...

Apples said she could see the diff in my face - I can a pit - but pictures don't really show the diff that much imho yep enabling and codependency go hand in hand..

Charlene - botox can take a week to come to it's full effect - the filler is immediate - but the swelling last for a bit too.. The only problem with doing this - is you are going to want more and after a few months - it wears off -I can even see where my filler could use a touch up - each person is diff on how their body reacts to this stuff - botox really only lasted me 3 months - I am going to call an get appointment for my eyes - they are what bug me the most - still saggy - I really can't afford a full face lift - and don't want the 2 week down time - so next month I am going to call and get price..

Well dogs want to be fed - Idol tonite :0)

Thanks for the props on looking like a hottie ;0) it was nice for my handsome young boss to give me that complement and wore another dress that I got when I met Peaches in LV 3 yrs ago - got told why don't you wear that dress more often...

cbl

[Apples2 19]

Sharpeis are cute.

Woof...Woof...(that's the Sharpeis coming out in me). I can somehow overlook certain things and still feel as if I look 38. Realistically I KNOW I look 55 but it's that positive side of my brain. I know I have certain damage just from the weight loss and aging alone but choose to accept it for what it is. But...in no way do I judge anyone for going for fillers, doing a bit of plastic surgery, etc. This is going to sound sooooooooooooo vane.....but I don't care. LOL. I was born with a somewhat pretty face and got to enjoy it for a lot of years and now I am just going to settle in with what I have cuz when I look in the mirror once a day, it's still a bit acceptable and I don't think I am at the point of scaring the little ones on the street.

Arlene...good for you for going and doing what YOU feel you want to do. I hope it does what you wish for. Same as Janet. I really noticed a difference in her when I saw her this last time. One thing I need to do for myself is a panni. Now, some of you might be thinking..."That skinny bi_tch doesn't need that done"....my thing...it's affecting me and, for me, it's the completion of my journey. I truly don't think it will make a bit of difference in the way my clothes fit or how I look. I wake up 3-4 times a night and have to "reposition" my extra skin cuz it gets folded under my hips and ribs when I roll to my side in my sleep. I want if OFF. I'm tired of the sweating and rashes under it when I exert myself and when the weather is warm. I am tired of lifting it up in the shower. I am tired of the way it hangs out of my panties and rubs on the elastic when I walk. Just plain tired of it. We'll see what my next appt. brings. I have photos of rashes I need to submit to my LB doc (who does the surgery for his patients) and to get it submitted to insurance so I can be sure to get it done some time this summer so I can take time at the lake to recover.

I was hoping to hear from Julie's daughter by now. She stated that she would make sure and show her daughter my phone number and call me when she came out of surgery. If I don't hear from her tonight, I will call her cell in the morning. She was so sad that she was going to lose her band. I have always felt that the band (or the surgery she had after she got the band) has something to do with the pain she has. Nerves...nerves screwed up from surgery or the band sitting on the major Vega???? nerve. She had not inkling of that pain prior to her exploratory stomach surgery a couple of years ago. I thought for sure mayo would find it. I just told her to not worry so much about losing the band right now....especially if it is the culprit of her pain. Told her to look towards the future. Heal and then talk to her doc about alternatives. (i.e. RNY, Sleeve). She was pretty worked up. Wish I would hear from someone.

Had a full day.....had a couple of appts., ran to Menards (like Home Depot), had to replace my kitchen faucet and dishwashing soap dispenser. We here in our country have a lot of Iron in our Water and ruins dishwasher, washers, toilets....basically anything it comes into contact with. I feel like I am forever with my head in the toilet scrubbing out the rust. Anyway, the hard Water basically "froze" our kitchen faucet while we were gone. Of course, I found a good deal. I don't know how that happens with me....always seem to smell a good deal. Got it and ran with it and going to install it tomorrow.

Sounds crazy, but, then I treated myself to a nice lunch. Just me and my thoughts. I had a 6oz salmon fillet cooked on a mesquite plank, a baked potato and French onion Soup with full-on mozz cheese and French bread with a nice piece of mudslide cheesecake with coffee. So there. Just what I needed. How's that for being indulgent???? The table talk was a little dull (didn't want to get caught talking to myself) but I had a nice time. Spent a little too much time over coffee and paid for it.....drove home the 70 miles in snow, ice and slush. Took me twice as long and caused me much anxiety. Got home safe and sound and happy to be here.

[Meredith2424 0]

Oh poor Julie!!! I will pray for her. I hope that once this is resolved, her pain will be gone. We just all have to be here for her when she gets back. Great, please let her know that we are all here for her.

Went to Dr. today. Had to see the partner. He took the syringe and sucked out all of the Fluid. There was 5.6 cc's in there!!!! Not 5.2 like they thought. I remember a year or so ago, they thought my band was leaking and a whole cc disappeared. Well, here is .4 of it! He said sometimes that happens. He put me to 5.2, but said that now, I might need that .2 back in. We will see. I go back April 18th or something like that. Hopefully this is where I need to be right now. I had slim fast after and 4 oz of fish for dinner. I ate another 2 oz while cleaning up and doing dishes. Fingers crossed that this does the trick.

I was raised Catholic, so for Lent I am giving up "self sabotaging" behaviors. This basically pertains to food. I know many of you know exactly what I am talking about.

Ok, well, I'm going to hit the hay. Hopefully I will get some better sleep tonight since I have been up with this damn acid for the past two. Hopefully this work week is busier than it has been lately!

Night! Meredith

[IndioGirl55 32]

Apples glad you has a nice lunch... If you want a TT go for it...

Sandy - Can't wait to hear about yours

Me I'll live w/the tummy - I would do Face 1st then Arms - but I don't like pain ;0)

[Apples2 19]

Apples glad you has a nice lunch... If you want a TT go for it...

Sandy - Can't wait to hear about yours

Me I'll live w/the tummy - I would do Face 1st then Arms - but I don't like pain ;0)

No TT on order. A plain and simple panni. My tummy muscles are in tact and I feel very fortunate for that at my old age. My GP and LB both believe (after me being in their offices for symptoms) truly believe that it should be done. As far as pain goes...it's just for such a short while and outweighs waking up and pulling skin out from under me.

[Apples2 19]

Meredith...hope you get that good night's sleep. And, hoping you can figure out and that your doc can figure out where you need to be on your fills. This is my take on that illusive "sweet spot"...There is no such thing. Got made us hungry for a purpose. To nourish our bodies and to teach us boundries. Well....that didn't work with most of us. LOL. My point. I think that even though we have the band, we should still be able to appreciate and accept hunger pangs. If we do not have those hunger pangs, then we are dealing with reflux from over-filled bands. There is such a fine line involved in all of this. We ALL need to accept the fact that there is going to be hunger a couple hours after a meal. WE ALL need to accept the fact that we need to learn self-restraint to get us to the next meal. Plain and simple. Hugs on the issues you have been having and I truly hope that this is the fix that you need.

[Great2BThin 5]

I am with you Apples, gonna accept my face for what it is. I see younger in the mirror too. If I did something it would be legs probably, they bother me the most. Though I get rashes sometimes in my stomach. Wish you heard back from Julie too. Anxious to hear. Glad you had a nice lunch, sounds yummy.

Meredith, fun chatting this afternoon. Hope they have your band at a sweet spot now.

Sandy anxious as well to hear about your TT. How exciting.

[phyllser 3]

Sharpeis are cute.

I agree!!

Hmm, interesting and so true. But I don't do it anymore so maybe I am growing and learning. The Boundaries thing has really helped. Now I do what I want for my Grandma and stand up to my sisters and mom and am feeling much better about myself. This board is good 'practice'.

Good, I'll be a cute shar-pei! LOL

Wonderful "Happy Hour" at German friends' patio tonight. Fun! Not participating.... but BIG American vs. Canadian golf tournament tomorrow between many of our friends! Almost wants me to be a golfer!! HAHAHA!! BUT.... no real food today except for small eggbeater omelet this morning!

[Apples2 19]

Good Morning All...

Hadn't heard from Julie's DH after surgery and was getting concerned so I called on her cell phone and she answered. We did not talk long as the nurses came into her room to get her up to walk. Her band was removed. Her doc had hoped to do it with just a lap incision but doubted that he could. He needed to do a full incision and she also has the "hole" where they removed the port. There was on ulcer where the band had eroded. She is disappointed in losing her band but waiting to heal b/4 thinking of other options. Poor girl.

Her LB doc stopped in to visit and told her that he was very proud of her for maintaining her weight during all the crap that has gone on with her body the last many months. I am in hopes that removing the band will allow for her to live a much more normal life and the the band might just have been the culprit in some of this pain she has had. It's been my feeling since the beginning of her troubles.

Believe it or not, I am home for today. DH traveled a few hours to a machinery auction and DS is working from home doing bids and layouts on his computer. I am going to try to get some things in order around here, some bookwork done and make some chicken wild rice Soup. We have a wake this evening and a funeral tomorrow. (Adopted Bro's FIL passed away). I am still in my jammies and plan on not changing until I get my work done and then can hit the shower.

Hope you all have a great day.

[Great2BThin 5]

Thanks for the update Apples, been wondering how she's doing. Do they know what makes a band erode? Does it just happen? Is it something we do, or eat? Scary. Poor Julie with a big incision and all.

Praying for a quick recovery Julie.

Well my out of town company I was expecting tomorrow just cancelled. This is the 2nd time they were coming and the 2nd time they cancelled last minute. I was looking forward to seeing them, but in a way am relieved as now we can hit the road whenever for our roadtrip. I should tell myself they are still coming and clean house anyway, but then again.....LOL

[Apples2 19]

Heck, Great, just head for Denver and leave the house the way it is. Your baby GD is wanting her GM to hold her and your DD maybe needs to catch up on some sleep while you are there.