Sleeve or Bypass Regrets?

[sparkly_keeks 28]

I had a bypass earlier this year and so far zero regrets. My weight loss, even with bypass, has been slower than average due to a screwed-up metabolism from years and years of dieting. I know if I had gotten a sleeve I may have had slower weight loss and more stalls, so I am happy with my choice to get the bypass.

Since the surgery, I have a really strong sensation of restriction, next to no hunger, food aversions (sweet and fried foods) and I can taste things way more intensely. I can eat very small portions of junk foods like ice cream (1 or 2 tablespoons). Anything more than that and I just feel icky so I just avoid them. I lost my sugar cravings, which was the cause of my weight gain in the past. I hope those sugar cravings are gone for good because not having them will help a lot with maintenance.

The only struggle so far, however, is dehydration. I have to be so focused every day on meeting my Water goals. If I don't, I wake up in the middle of the night with the most awful dry mouth. Other than that, all is good.

Edited August 12, 2022 by sparkly_keeks

[kristieshannon 1,543]

Zero regrets. I’ll be three years out from my VSG next week. I’ve met my goal and maintained it. I’m happy & healthy. This was life changing. I only wish I’d done it sooner.

[miamiman86 1]

I do regret it. I’m 36 years old, 5’7’, and before surgery I was weighing 248 lbs. I actually was unhappy with my weight, specially with my belly, because I couldn’t wear t shirts without seeing my belly pop out and the rest of the body out of proportion. But my wife thought losing weight would help, and since she had friends that already done this, she said would be the fastest and easiest way to get it done. I wanted to see a nutritionist or get more activity in, but I also let laziness get the best way of me. It’s really my fault and not hers because I should’ve put my foot down. We went to Ecuador to get the procedure done, since they don’t require for you to be over 300 lbs to get the surgery, as long as you have the money, which I did. Even when I went into the ER, I wanted to get up the bed and run back out but I couldn’t because I felt I was going to disappoint my wife. Now I feel a bit like a chump, but I ended disappointing me. After the surgery, is when I realized these doctors down there are only doing it for the money. At least three patients I saw where 40 pounds lighter than me and got the surgery done. That’s just criminal to me, but it’s their money. Right now, it’s been about a month since the surgery was done (gastric sleeve). I’ve lost 35 pounds and moved on to the semi solid food. I’m actually doing great progress, not rejecting any food, haven’t thrown up at all and I can even hold a bit better than the diet says… but I’m even unhappier than before. I felt up to the moment of the surgery than I didn’t needed to do it, I could’ve dieted and do exercise but no, went the “easy” route which is not really easy. Since the surgery and coming back home, I’ve gone out 3 times, with all times just being mentally fucked and coming back home before time to just get drained emotionally in my bed. My wife says nothing, maybe because she understand what I’m going through. I loved eating. I loved tasting. I know I will be back to that soon, but I don’t know if it will be the same. It would kill me inside. I’m posting this because I know everyone here (majority) is happy they got the procedure done, but I didn’t needed it. And now that I regret, I dread everything that it will bring. My advice to you is: don’t think once, don’t think twice… really think you want to do this, and if you’re not too overweight, do not do it. Look for alternative ways before you resort to get this procedure. If you really need it, by all means, but think it over very well. I’m actually looking for professional help right now, and got an appointment set, because I’ve had some dark thoughts and I know if I don’t take care of my mental health, I won’t be here in 3 more months. I wanted to vent and let everyone know that this is not for everybody. I do hope not get to the day I don’t regret this, but today it isn’t that day. Thank you.

[Arabesque 6,469]

So sorry you are feeling this way @miamiman86 and I’m really glad you are seeking help.

You actually raised some important points about weight loss surgery.

It is not the easy way. It’s hard. Harder than just going on a diet or exercising. It will get easier but I know I will always have to watch what I eat & why I’m eating. The surgery removed part of my tummy but not the part of my brain that was behind my eating. That’s always with me.

The decision to have the surgery has to be yours & yours alone. You alone are the one who has to do the work & live the experience. Your wife may have thought it would help you (& there are many health benefits) but if you’re not ready or unsure about having the surgery don’t have it. You need a lot of mental & emotional strength & if your head & heart aren’t ready & willing the surgery isn’t for you (at least not until you are ready).

I’m glad you are doing well so far despite your regret. I will add, in time you will enjoy food as much as you did before. These early days are restrictive but it does change & improve. How you manage your maintenance, when you get where you want to be, is really up to you. You make the choices that allow you to live & enjoy your life & maintain your health & mental, physical & emotional well being. In time you may choose to eat differently. For example you may still eat old favourite foods but swap out ingredients or use different different cooking methods that offer better nutrition. You may choose to still enjoy certain ‘less healthy’ foods but you eat them less frequently in smaller portions.

All the best.

[ShoppGirl 3,353]

I had the sleeve and I did not lose as much as I had hoped. I often wonder if I would have done better with the bypass. I went with sleeve for a reason though (I’m on psyc meds that sometimes tend to not absorb as well with bypass) and I was also warned that I may not lose all my weight because of my meds so it’s really hard to say if I would’ve been better off with bypass. Guess I’ll never know. I think that they both very good surgeries that can get you down to a healthy weight even if it’s not the exact weight we would dream of.

[SuziDavis 544]

I went back and forth a bit on if I should have went for bypass rather than sleeve. But I don't regret my decision. I know that I will not lose as fast, but I am ok with that, and I like knowing that revisions are possible.

[BigSue 1,320]

On 10/10/2022 at 11:52 PM, miamiman86 said:

I do regret it. I’m 36 years old, 5’7’, and before surgery I was weighing 248 lbs. I actually was unhappy with my weight, specially with my belly, because I couldn’t wear t shirts without seeing my belly pop out and the rest of the body out of proportion. But my wife thought losing weight would help, and since she had friends that already done this, she said would be the fastest and easiest way to get it done. I wanted to see a nutritionist or get more activity in, but I also let laziness get the best way of me. It’s really my fault and not hers because I should’ve put my foot down. We went to Ecuador to get the procedure done, since they don’t require for you to be over 300 lbs to get the surgery, as long as you have the money, which I did. Even when I went into the ER, I wanted to get up the bed and run back out but I couldn’t because I felt I was going to disappoint my wife. Now I feel a bit like a chump, but I ended disappointing me. After the surgery, is when I realized these doctors down there are only doing it for the money. At least three patients I saw where 40 pounds lighter than me and got the surgery done. That’s just criminal to me, but it’s their money. Right now, it’s been about a month since the surgery was done (gastric sleeve). I’ve lost 35 pounds and moved on to the semi solid food. I’m actually doing great progress, not rejecting any food, haven’t thrown up at all and I can even hold a bit better than the diet says… but I’m even unhappier than before. I felt up to the moment of the surgery than I didn’t needed to do it, I could’ve dieted and do exercise but no, went the “easy” route which is not really easy. Since the surgery and coming back home, I’ve gone out 3 times, with all times just being mentally fucked and coming back home before time to just get drained emotionally in my bed. My wife says nothing, maybe because she understand what I’m going through. I loved eating. I loved tasting. I know I will be back to that soon, but I don’t know if it will be the same. It would kill me inside. I’m posting this because I know everyone here (majority) is happy they got the procedure done, but I didn’t needed it. And now that I regret, I dread everything that it will bring. My advice to you is: don’t think once, don’t think twice… really think you want to do this, and if you’re not too overweight, do not do it. Look for alternative ways before you resort to get this procedure. If you really need it, by all means, but think it over very well. I’m actually looking for professional help right now, and got an appointment set, because I’ve had some dark thoughts and I know if I don’t take care of my mental health, I won’t be here in 3 more months. I wanted to vent and let everyone know that this is not for everybody. I do hope not get to the day I don’t regret this, but today it isn’t that day. Thank you.

I’m sorry to hear you have so many regrets. Thank you for sharing your story — I think it is important for people considering this surgery to see the good, the bad, and the ugly. When I was considering surgery, I actively sought people who regretted it because I wanted to be prepared for the worst-case scenario, but it’s hard to find negative information because it’s mainly people who are happy with their surgery who post on forums like this.

I started out very heavy (BMI over 60), so it was pretty clear that I couldn’t lose the weight I needed to lose without surgery, but even then it was a difficult decision. I am often surprised that people starting with a BMI under 35 would put themselves through this surgery. I don’t say that to judge, but this surgery is rough, and to me, such a high risk/cost was only worth it for the potential of a high reward. But that cost/benefit analysis is something that every individual has to do for him or herself.

I would like to say that I hope you get to the day you don’t regret the surgery, and I think you have a good shot at getting there. It is very common to have regrets early on, even for people who end up being very glad they got the surgery. The beginning is really hard, and it gets easier for most people after the first several months. I hope that once you lose more weight, progress to normal food, and get used to your new lifestyle, you will be happier and not regret having the surgery.