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Slim body but your brain's still thinking fat



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I'm just amused at how my own perception of the space I take up hasn't caught up with how much slimmer I am. I still inwardly flinch at the sight of close-packed tables and chairs at a cafe or restaurant before I realise I can slip through no problem now! I still get out of people's way when there's plenty of room and I no longer need to - it's still a reflex. My brain is so used to being spatially aware for a morbidly obese body that it's taking a surprising amount of time for it to catch up to a much smaller me. I'm constantly amazed I can slip between cafe chairs and tables now without a) other folks doing the shuffle so I can fit past, or b) risking my arse moving inches from someone's face as I knock tables on the way through with a chorus of "sorry!"s.

What are some things that have snuck up on you that your mind hasn't caught up with yet?

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Automatically heading for the disabled stall in restrooms, before remembering that I fit in a regular stall now.

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1 hour ago, FutureSylph said:

Automatically heading for the disabled stall in restrooms, before remembering that I fit in a regular stall now.

Yesss, I am still plenty chubby. But I fit comfortably in a standard stall and still find myself going to the disabled ones! I just did it last night at the movies.

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I buy clothes online and each time I receive something I think I ordered a too small size, only to try it and feel it fits right or loose. It happens every time. While I am holding a new pair of jeans my head is "What was I thinking?".

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I think it is kind of normal to think of yourself in a certain way when you have been that way for so long. Conversely, many people who have been skinny all their lives still live their life as if they were skinny when they are putting on a lot of weight. I always think of myself as an overweight person when I am out and about in the world. I still feel like people are looking at me and judging me for my appearance, what food I order or similar things. I think I will eventually think of myself as a normal sized person but I am sure it will be a slow evolution to that.

I some ways it is really not a bad thing because you know where you came from and will not pass judgement and scorn on those who are struggling with weight issues like has been done to all of us through our lives.

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8 hours ago, Smanky said:

I'm just amused at how my own perception of the space I take up hasn't caught up with how much slimmer I am. I still inwardly flinch at the sight of close-packed tables and chairs at a cafe or restaurant before I realise I can slip through no problem now! I still get out of people's way when there's plenty of room and I no longer need to - it's still a reflex. My brain is so used to being spatially aware for a morbidly obese body that it's taking a surprising amount of time for it to catch up to a much smaller me. I'm constantly amazed I can slip between cafe chairs and tables now without a) other folks doing the shuffle so I can fit past, or b) risking my arse moving inches from someone's face as I knock tables on the way through with a chorus of "sorry!"s.

What are some things that have snuck up on you that your mind hasn't caught up with yet?

All of this! Plus when I pick up my US size 10 pants/medium I can't imagine they will possibly fit, but they DO!

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It does take time for your brain to catch up. I had a couple of funny/freaky experience because I simply didn’t recognise myself. I was admiring someone’s legs in a busy shoe shop & then realised they were mine in a mirror. Also noticed a woman wearing jeans & the same top as me & thinking I wish I looked as good as she did. Then looked up at her face & again it was my reflection.

I was regularly kicking my toes against my kitchen cupboard base boards because I didn’t have a tummy that reached the cupboard first to warn me. Used to have bruises on my thighs from squeezing past & banging into furniture. Then I went through a stage of still having bruises because I was misjudging how much space I actually needed now & was still trying to ‘squeeze’ past.

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I still worry about the weight limits on chairs, and then I have to remind myself that I'm under the weight limit for everything now!
And I definitely still go to buy clothes and think they won't fit and they end up fitting! Or the reverse is, I'll pick out an item of clothing and think it will fit and it ends up being way too big because I still have in my mind that I'm larger.
There have been times I caught myself in the mirror or in a picture and didn't recognize myself!

Sent from my Pixel 5a using BariatricPal mobile app

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Oh! And one other thing I thought about.. There are certain things I still catch myself doing the way I had to do them when I was 393 lbs. Like, going down steps, I had to hold on and sort of turn a little sideways and step one foot then the other to each step. Sometimes I catch myself doing that and then I remember I don't have to do that anymore. I can run down the stairs without holding on!



Sent from my Pixel 5a using BariatricPal mobile app

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Seven years out, I still sometimes think people are going to look into my grocery cart to see what "fat people" eat (although I didn't eat crap even when I was morbidly obese!), and I still sometimes get a fleeting fear that someone is going to say something or stare at me if I'm walking around outside eating an ice cream cone. Then I remember I'm not fat anymore, so no one is going to stare or say anything!

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On 7/1/2022 at 8:41 AM, Tony B - NJ said:

I think it is kind of normal to think of yourself in a certain way when you have been that way for so long.

Agreed. I started my road to morbid obesity later in life (in my early 30’s). So when i was bigger, i still thought i was smaller and would bang my shoulders on walls not thinking I actually needed to give my myself a wider berth to round corners, lol. Or i’d pick our clothes thinking they would fit and be suprised/disappointed when they were way too tight.

Then, later, I suppose i was big long enough (im 50 now) to ingraine in my head that there was no effing way i would fit into a size 2 when i lost the weight after wls.

Im 3.5+ years post now (and over 3 years at my current weight/size), and the weird surprises about fitting into things are long gone.

To the OP, As with all things, its just a matter of time before you get used to stuff and it becomes your new normal.

But its a fun kind or surprise so go ahead and bask in it!

Good Luck! ❤️

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I'm just amused at how my own perception of the space I take up hasn't caught up with how much slimmer I am. I still inwardly flinch at the sight of close-packed tables and chairs at a cafe or restaurant before I realise I can slip through no problem now! I still get out of people's way when there's plenty of room and I no longer need to - it's still a reflex. My brain is so used to being spatially aware for a morbidly obese body that it's taking a surprising amount of time for it to catch up to a much smaller me. I'm constantly amazed I can slip between cafe chairs and tables now without a) other folks doing the shuffle so I can fit past, or B) risking my arse moving inches from someone's face as I knock tables on the way through with a chorus of "sorry!"s.
What are some things that have snuck up on you that your mind hasn't caught up with yet?

Ommgg I'm not at my goal weight yet but I feel this. The biggest thing is how my heart literally races, my face turns red and I shake when I need to get on an airplane. I've learned by traveling a lot recently that seat belts fit with room but in my mind I still feel like that 340 lb person waiting to be embarrassed to find out the seat belt won't fit or barely closes. When I tell you my heart RACES still, it's crazy. I wonder when it won't be such an anxiety provoking moment. I also have body dysmorphia and still feel like I'm at my heaviest most days. It's a big long mental journey too.

Sent from my SM-G975U using BariatricPal mobile app

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