Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Absolutely hate myself now



Recommended Posts

3 hours ago, Tony B - NJ said:

I think this person is trolling you all. I commend all of you for wanting to help this person if they are legitimate because that is what we do on here. This one seems too defiant and unwilling to consider any recommendations which just smacks of trolling. I wish this person the best if they are legit and implore them to get help right away if they are legit. But saying that they will seek help but it will not make a difference seems a little fishy. If someone does not think therapy will make a difference they simply do not go. If someone wants help they do not reject every offer of help that is provided. This post does not ring true for me. We have legitimate people on here that deserve our support and help.

I've been thinking the same thing

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

7 hours ago, Tony B - NJ said:

I think this person is trolling you all. I commend all of you for wanting to help this person if they are legitimate because that is what we do on here. This one seems too defiant and unwilling to consider any recommendations which just smacks of trolling. I wish this person the best if they are legit and implore them to get help right away if they are legit. But saying that they will seek help but it will not make a difference seems a little fishy. If someone does not think therapy will make a difference they simply do not go. If someone wants help they do not reject every offer of help that is provided. This post does not ring true for me. We have legitimate people on here that deserve our support and help.

Tony, my thoughts exactly.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

8 hours ago, Tony B - NJ said:

I think this person is trolling you all. I commend all of you for wanting to help this person if they are legitimate because that is what we do on here. This one seems too defiant and unwilling to consider any recommendations which just smacks of trolling. I wish this person the best if they are legit and implore them to get help right away if they are legit. But saying that they will seek help but it will not make a difference seems a little fishy. If someone does not think therapy will make a difference they simply do not go. If someone wants help they do not reject every offer of help that is provided. This post does not ring true for me. We have legitimate people on here that deserve our support and help.

My feelings are valid like everyone else. Sorry I don't believe it gets any better. Thanks for triggering my anxiety by calling me names.. I was trying to find someone who feels the same as I do. But obviously I wont here. Don't respond to this post anymore, I am logging out and will be deleting the app. Sorry for having feelings that are bad.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

8 hours ago, rmp09 said:

My feelings are valid like everyone else. Sorry I don't believe it gets any better. Thanks for triggering my anxiety by calling me names.. I was trying to find someone who feels the same as I do. But obviously I wont here. Don't respond to this post anymore, I am logging out and will be deleting the app. Sorry for having feelings that are bad.

Whoa, nobody called you names. We ALL offered you support and advice. You rejected all of it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On 5/3/2022 at 10:25 AM, rmp09 said:

It seems that I am literally the only one who 100%completely regrets this surgery. I have never hated myself this much in my life. I was so obsessed with this weight loss crap for 3 yrs and now 6 weeks healed from VSG and I hate life completely now. I will never be or feel like myself again and feel I don't deserve anything good ever again. This was the worst decision of my life and I keep having ptsd flashbacks of wishing I had never done this..that I canceled when I had the chance. Why am I the only one who fully regrets this.. I can't be the only one in the world who regrets it completely...

Sent from my SM-G781W using BariatricPal mobile app

you will be fine as I have said in replies to your posts before and privately ( I have sent you another message a little while back that you may no have seen yet). It gets better it really does. You need to stop regretting and stop the what if's. It's done you cant change it. IT GETS BETTER, I felt exactly like you I started to feel better around the 5 to 6 month mark and now at the 9 month mark I mostly don't have any regrets. Get some counselling to help you through the grieving process remind yourself why you did this and I know you don't care about the weight loss right now I was the same but you will when you start feeling better. I am even at the point of oh no I have stopped losing. you also need to accept that you are not the only one who feels has felt like this, accept what we are telling you. YOU WILL FEEL BETTER. you will feel like yourself again only better. you will be able to eat all the foods you love only in smaller amounts. I can eat way more than I ever thought I would these days so much so I wish my restriction was better.

Do you work? have you got friends you can talk to about this? what hobbies do you have? try to do things that you enjoy and take your mind off it.

Have a good cry about it, I cried multiple times a day I couldn't even utter the word surgery without crying I wanted it outlawed. now I would happily recommend it to people but I would also tell them the first 6 months are rough.

Ask yourself and tell us what exactly is it that makes you think you will never be yourself again what are your fears what is causing the regret ? once you have the answers to those questions you can and we can help you move forward.

Edited by SleeverSk

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

12 hours ago, rmp09 said:

My feelings are valid like everyone else. Sorry I don't believe it gets any better. Thanks for triggering my anxiety by calling me names.. I was trying to find someone who feels the same as I do. But obviously I wont here. Don't respond to this post anymore, I am logging out and will be deleting the app. Sorry for having feelings that are bad.

you did find someone who felt the same as you and I have reached out more than once to you

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On 5/3/2022 at 3:38 PM, Possum220 said:

Please be kind to yourself. Your body has had a major change. You will find a new way to be in this world if you want to.

love your ticker its very cute

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On 5/3/2022 at 12:40 PM, rmp09 said:

I hate all of it. I am the pickiest eater I'm the world and won't eat most things. I hate that I can't drink with my meals, I hate what they tell me I should eat because I won't eat like 90%of it.. worst decision ever.

Sent from my SM-G781W using BariatricPal mobile app

you will be able to drink with your meals if you really want to. I went to a friends for afternoon tea which was a lovely platter and drinks ( non alcoholic) i panicked and thought how do i do this without offending, I ate a little bit had a little drink it worked fine i have done it a couple of time since without an issue. I try to have a drink before food unless its soda then i have it after for obvious reason I try to avoid soda around meal times but I can drink with food. you will work out your limitation but i would wait til the 6 month mark before you start experimenting with things like that

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

23 hours ago, Tony B - NJ said:

I think this person is trolling you all. I commend all of you for wanting to help this person if they are legitimate because that is what we do on here. This one seems too defiant and unwilling to consider any recommendations which just smacks of trolling. I wish this person the best if they are legit and implore them to get help right away if they are legit. But saying that they will seek help but it will not make a difference seems a little fishy. If someone does not think therapy will make a difference they simply do not go. If someone wants help they do not reject every offer of help that is provided. This post does not ring true for me. We have legitimate people on here that deserve our support and help.

100%

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I’m reading a lot of things that sound like suicidal ideation in your comments. I’m a clinical social worker and should you be serious and not just grieving/processing the new lifestyle you have…
Suicide hotline: 800-273-8255. Open 24/7

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

18 minutes ago, redhead_che said:

I’m reading a lot of things that sound like suicidal ideation in your comments. I’m a clinical social worker and should you be serious and not just grieving/processing the new lifestyle you have…
Suicide hotline: 800-273-8255. Open 24/7

Good recommendation Redhead_che.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don’t love that I had surgery either! My surgery was February 25 then April 13 I was back in for gallbladder removal. A couple weeks later I had a leak, so back to the hospital. I now have bathroom issues, and a super sharp pain under my right rib that take my breath away like a spasm. Nothing has been even close to normal. I thought maybe I was the only one with regrets too!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On 5/3/2022 at 9:17 AM, rmp09 said:

I don't believe in God. Sorry

Sent from my SM-G781W using BariatricPal mobile app

I don't either. I hate when people tell random other people on the internet to give it to god or to pray. Why do they assume we believe in god???

But, you sound borderline suicidal and I suggest you might need to reach out to someone URGENTLY!

Please get help. Feeling like you want to die is NOT a normal reaction to WLS. Regret is common, but you sound like you are in crisis.

Good luck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On 5/6/2022 at 12:11 PM, planham said:

I don’t love that I had surgery either! My surgery was February 25 then April 13 I was back in for gallbladder removal. A couple weeks later I had a leak, so back to the hospital. I now have bathroom issues, and a super sharp pain under my right rib that take my breath away like a spasm. Nothing has been even close to normal. I thought maybe I was the only one with regrets too!

Hi @planham , I had my WLS in Nov 21 and developed gallbladder symptoms in Jan 21. Due to 1) my symptoms causing me discomfort but NOT being an immediate medical emergency (no gallstones moving about), and 2) Covid-related backlogs, I wasn’t able to have my gallbladder surgery until April 12.

I mention this because that sharp pain under your right rib may be related to the (former) gallbladder — I also am experiencing this and it’s not something I had after my WLS (I had more of a gap in time between my WLS and gallbladder than you did). My gallbladder surgeon told me this is an unfortunate side effect that happens as the body heals from the surgery and the biliary passages compensate for the former gallbladder by widening a bit. My sharp pains are slowly subsiding and I hope yours will, too.

Having WLS followed so shortly by gallbladder removal is A LOT for you and your body to go through. I had extreme food intolerance leading up to the gallbladder removal, and my recovery was more painful than my GBS. It sounds like you may not have proceeded to a regular diet prior to your gallbladder surgery. I was fortunate not to have had too many issues with nausea following my WLS, but my gallbladder (or perhaps the combo) really did a number on me.

I was miserable, and due to a hounding manager, I was back to work the Monday following the gallbladder surgery (albeit remotely).

I’m not trying to tell you how to feel about WLS or dismiss your concerns about having had it — I wanted to share my experience in hopes that it may help you during your recovery. Be kind to yourself — you’ve been through the wringer in the past few months. Although gallbladder stones and problems are a known side effect following WLS, I know many people who developed gallbladder issues independent of WLS.

Sending all good thoughts and karma as you recover.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On 5/4/2022 at 10:45 AM, redhead_che said:

I’m reading a lot of things that sound like suicidal ideation in your comments. I’m a clinical social worker and should you be serious and not just grieving/processing the new lifestyle you have…
Suicide hotline: 800-273-8255. Open 24/7

Same here, I appreciate how supportive everyone is but also see a little feeding into some really negative thought patterns. This is more than a bad day, it's serious and needs clinical help asap, like calling the surgeon for an urgent referral.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Prdgrdma

      So I guess after gastric bypass surgery, I cant eat flock chips because they are fried???  They sell them on here so I thought I could have them. So high in protein and no carbs.  They don't bother me at all.  Help. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        It's possible for a very high fat meal to cause dumping in some (30% or so) gastric bypass patients, although it's more likely to be triggered by high sugar, or by the high fat/high sugar combo (think ice cream, donuts). Dietitians will tell you to never do anything that isn't 100% healthy ever again. Realistically, you should aim for a good balance of protein, carbs, and fat each day. Should you eat fried foods every day? No. Is it possible they will make you sick? Maybe. Is it okay to eat some to see what happens and have them for a treat every now and again? Yes.

    • NovelTee

      I'm not at all hungry on this liquid pre-op diet, but I miss the sensation of chewing. It's been about two weeks––surgery is in two days––and I can't imagine how I'll feel a couple of weeks post-op. Tonight, I randomly stumbled upon a mukbang channel on YouTube, and it was strangely soothing... is it just me, or is this a thing? 
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        I actually watched cooking shows during my pre-op, like Great British Baking Show. It was a little bizarre, but didn't make me hungry. I think it was also soothing in a way.

    • Clueless_girl

      How do you figure out what your ideal weight should be? I've had a figure in my head for years, but after 3 mths of recovery I'm already almost there. So maybe my goal should be lower?
      · 2 replies
      1. NickelChip

        Well, there is actually a formula for "Ideal Body Weight" and you can use a calculator to figure it out for you. This one also does an adjusted weight for a person who starts out overweight or obese. https://www.mdcalc.com/calc/68/ideal-body-weight-adjusted-body-weight

        I would use that as a starting point, and then just see how you feel as you lose. How you look and feel is more important than a number.

      2. Clueless_girl

        I did find different calculators but I couldn't find any that accounted for body frame. But you're right, it is just a number. It was just disheartening to see that although I lost 60% of my excess weight, it's still not in the "normal/healthy" range..

    • Aunty Mamo

      Tomorrow marks two weeks since surgery day and while I'm feeling remarkably well and going about just about every normal activity, I did wind up with a surface abscess on on of my incision sights and was put on an antibiotic that made me so impacted that it took me more than two hours to eliminate yesterday and scared the hell out of me. Now there's Miralax in all my beverages that aren't Smooth Move tea. I cannot experience that again. I shouldn't have to take Ativan to go to the lady's. I really looking forward to my body getting with the program again. 
      I'm in day three of the "puree" stage of eating and despite the strange textures, all of the savory flavors seem decadent. 
      I timed this surgery so that I'd be recovering during my spring break. That was a good plan. Today is a state holiday and the final day of break. I feel really strong to return to school tomorrow. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Now that I'm in maintenance mode, I'm getting a into a routine for my meals. Every day, I start out with 8-16 ounces of water, and then a proffee, which I have come to look forward to even the night before. My proffees are simply a black coffee with a protein powder added. There are three products that I cycle through: Premier Vanilla, Orgain Vanilla, and Dymatize Vanilla.
      For second breakfast on workdays, I will have a low-fat yogurt with two tablespoons of PBFit and two teaspoons of no sugar added dried cherries. I will have ingested 35-45 grams of protein at this point between the two breakfasts, with 250-285 calories, and about 20 carbs.
      For second breakfast on non-workdays, I will prepare two servings of plain, instant oatmeal with a tablespoon of an olive oil-based spread. This means I will have had 34 grams of protein, 365 calories, and 38 carbs. Non-workdays are when I am being very active with training sessions, so I allow myself more carbohydrate fuel.
      Snacks on any day are always mixed nuts, even when I am travelling. I will have 0.2 cups of a blend that I make myself. It consists of dry roasted peanuts, cashews, pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds, pistachios, and Brazil nuts. This is 5 grams of protein, 163 calories, and 7 carbs.
      Breakfast and snacks have been the easiest to nail down. Lunch and dinner have more variables, and I prepare enough for leftovers. I concentrate on protein first, and then add vegetables. Typically tempeh, tofu, or Field Roast products with roasted or sautéed vegetables. Today, I will be eating leftovers from last night. Two ounces of tempeh with four ounces of roasted vegetables that consist of red and yellow sweet peppers, sweet potatoes, small purple potatoes, zucchini, and carrots. I will add a tablespoon of olive oil-based spread, break up 3 walnuts to sprinkle of top, and garnish with two tablespoons of grated Parmesan cheese. This particular meal will be 19 grams of protein, 377 calories, and 28 grams of carbs. Bear in mind that I do eat more carbs when I am not working, and I focus on ingesting healthy carbs instead of breads/crackers/chips/crisps.
      It's a helluva journey and I'm thankful to be on it!
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×