“Testing” your limits of food intake

[Jaelzion 1,123]

20 hours ago, Mike Long said:

Thanks for the responses. To be clear, I should’ve Clarified what my friend said. She didn’t mean gorge myself. She meant that I should eat until I’m full. And feel what it feels like. This was after I told her that I didn’t think I’m actually eating until I’m full as I was nervous. She was coming at it from the standpoint of making sure I was getting all my nutrients.

I can understand the impulse to ask "Exactly how much CAN I eat now"? The difficulty is that things are different after the surgery. Pre-op, I could tell when I was getting full and I'd automatically slow down my eating and then stop. Post-op, the cues that you've had enough can be much subtler. One. single. bite. can be the difference between "satisfied" and "miserable". Early on, when I was about 3 weeks out, I ate too much for the first, and last time. The combination of pain, nausea, and distress was horrible. It was so miserable that I've never eaten too much again, in two years. I was lucky in that, the episode was short-lived because I threw up. Since then, there have been a couple of times when I took one last bite and then spit it out because I felt like it was going to send me over the edge. So when I caution you about this plan, it's coming from a place of remembering what it feels like to overeat in the early days after surgery. No bueno.

[Mike Long 52]

20 minutes ago, Jaelzion said:

I can understand the impulse to ask "Exactly how much CAN I eat now"? The difficulty is that things are different after the surgery. Pre-op, I could tell when I was getting full and I'd automatically slow down my eating and then stop. Post-op, the cues that you've had enough can be much subtler. One. single. bite. can be the difference between "satisfied" and "miserable". Early on, when I was about 3 weeks out, I ate too much for the first, and last time. The combination of pain, nausea, and distress was horrible. It was so miserable that I've never eaten too much again, in two years. I was lucky in that, the episode was short-lived because I threw up. Since then, there have been a couple of times when I took one last bite and then spit it out because I felt like it was going to send me over the edge. So when I caution you about this plan, it's coming from a place of remembering what it feels like to overeat in the early days after surgery. No bueno.

Thanks. I really appreciate your thoughts. I have taken the safe route since the surgery and I haven’t really been uncomfortable or sick yet. I’ve been so cognizant of it I think that’s why my friend said what she said. I’ve been afraid to eat too much. But that has also caused some anxiety about me questioning if I’m getting enough. I don’t want to lose muscle. I don’t want to get sick from lack of nutrients. I gotta say that if I had known this before I wouldn’t have had the surgery. I’m sure that I’ll laugh at that statement in a few months or years when I look back at this. But right now all I can think about is this feeling I have that I’ll never be able to eat more than a tiny piece of food again. I’d rather be obese and take my chances and be happier than miserable and not obese. Sounds awful but that’s the goins on. Anyhoo, thanks for the response. It does help.

[catwoman7 10,845]

10 minutes ago, Mike Long said:

Thanks. I really appreciate your thoughts. I have taken the safe route since the surgery and I haven’t really been uncomfortable or sick yet. I’ve been so cognizant of it I think that’s why my friend said what she said. I’ve been afraid to eat too much. But that has also caused some anxiety about me questioning if I’m getting enough. I don’t want to lose muscle. I don’t want to get sick from lack of nutrients. I gotta say that if I had known this before I wouldn’t have had the surgery. I’m sure that I’ll laugh at that statement in a few months or years when I look back at this. But right now all I can think about is this feeling I have that I’ll never be able to eat more than a tiny piece of food again. I’d rather be obese and take my chances and be happier than miserable and not obese. Sounds awful but that’s the goins on. Anyhoo, thanks for the response. It does help.

you WILL lose some muscle. You'll also lose bone and fat. Weight loss comes from pretty much everything - bone, muscle, fat, Water. Although regular exercise and getting enough Protein will help preserve enough of the muscle so that you remain healthy. Also, at a much lower weight, you're not going to need as much "infrastructure" (bone and muscle) to hold up your new weight.

and I can guarantee you will not be eating a tiny piece of food forever. That's just the first few weeks. No one would be able to tell that I had weight loss surgery at this point. They would just assume I'm a "light eater", if they even noticed at all. I eat about the same amount as my never-been-obese friends who are watching their weight.

you shouldn't have nutrient deficiencies if you're taking Vitamins. And in a few weeks you'll be able to eat more food - and a larger variety of food - so you'll get more nutrients then, too.

[Mike Long 52]

50 minutes ago, catwoman7 said:

you WILL lose some muscle. You'll also lose bone and fat. Weight loss comes from pretty much everything - bone, muscle, fat, Water. Although regular exercise and getting enough Protein will help preserve enough of the muscle so that you remain healthy. Also, at a much lower weight, you're not going to need as much "infrastructure" (bone and muscle) to hold up your new weight.

and I can guarantee you will not be eating a tiny piece of food forever. That's just the first few weeks. No one would be able to tell that I had weight loss surgery at this point. They would just assume I'm a "light eater", if they even noticed at all. I eat about the same amount as my never-been-obese friends who are watching their weight.

you shouldn't have nutrient deficiencies if you're taking Vitamins. And in a few weeks you'll be able to eat more food - and a larger variety of food - so you'll get more nutrients then, too.

Thank you. This is very helpful. I think more than anything I’m venting lol. I don’t have an outlet other than the friend I mentioned in this thread. My family supports me but only so much. they don’t understand Any of this and quite frankly don’t seem to want to. Nobody is overweight In my family or wife’s family. I’m literally the only one who would even be considered not a normal size. My wife, for example, asks me the other day why I can’t go out in the garden and till and help her build a shed lol. She’s basically clueless. That’s for another topic tho lol. So I feel I have to use this outlet. Thanks again for the response.

[rjan 163]

3 hours ago, Mike Long said:

I gotta say that if I had known this before I wouldn’t have had the surgery. I’m sure that I’ll laugh at that statement in a few months or years when I look back at this. But right now all I can think about is this feeling I have that I’ll never be able to eat more than a tiny piece of food again. I’d rather be obese and take my chances and be happier than miserable and not obese. Sounds awful but that’s the goins on. Anyhoo, thanks for the response. It does help.

I definitely worried that I had made a mistake during the first month post-op. It's a huge, sudden, irreversible change, and you have no idea how things are going to even out in the end.

13 months later, and I'm a normal BMI, I eat normal foods that I enjoy and don't feel deprived or guilty about what I eat anymore, and my health is much better (both my bloodwork and how I feel). I couldn't be happier that I did it. Most likely, you will get there too!

[WanderingHeart 140]

2 hours ago, Mike Long said:

Thank you. This is very helpful. I think more than anything I’m venting lol. I don’t have an outlet other than the friend I mentioned in this thread. My family supports me but only so much. they don’t understand Any of this and quite frankly don’t seem to want to. Nobody is overweight In my family or wife’s family. I’m literally the only one who would even be considered not a normal size. My wife, for example, asks me the other day why I can’t go out in the garden and till and help her build a shed lol. She’s basically clueless. That’s for another topic tho lol. So I feel I have to use this outlet. Thanks again for the response.

That sounds hard. I don’t get the wife comment - because you’re recovering? I’m new at this and I also have these questions.. whether I made the right decision, how this is going to be.

I knew I had a relationship with food that was not feeling good anymore. It felt like I was held hostage by hunger, like I was powerless, like I couldn’t actually enjoy food because I had to eat quickly and shut up the hunger. My “why” is to develop a more positive relationship with food and my body. To be able to hear her and what she needs. To be able to move easily and run with my kids and tend to our victory garden. I’m holding on to that.

what was your why?

[Mike Long 52]

1 hour ago, WanderingHeart said:

That sounds hard. I don’t get the wife comment - because you’re recovering? I’m new at this and I also have these questions.. whether I made the right decision, how this is going to be.

I knew I had a relationship with food that was not feeling good anymore. It felt like I was held hostage by hunger, like I was powerless, like I couldn’t actually enjoy food because I had to eat quickly and shut up the hunger. My “why” is to develop a more positive relationship with food and my body. To be able to hear her and what she needs. To be able to move easily and run with my kids and tend to our victory garden. I’m holding on to that.

what was your why?

The wife comment is about recovery, yes. She doesn’t get it that I can’t be lifting and pulling and working on a shed just after this. Anyhoo, I didn’t have all of what you’re saying with food. I just ate what I wanted when I wanted and how much ever I wanted. I definitely didn’t have a healthy relationship but I never was cerebral about it. Also having a desk job doesn’t help. I also am not a person who cares what people think of me so I didn’t have body image issues. My why is I realized that there’s nobody in their 70’s, 80’s or 90’s walking around my size. They don’t exist. I have two young boys that need me and I want to see them become men. So I made the decision. Right now I hate it. Absolutely hate it. But I’m hopeful each day and week is better than the last and I’ll get a grip on the mental anguish I’m going thru.

[Jaelzion 1,123]

5 hours ago, Mike Long said:

Thanks. I really appreciate your thoughts. I have taken the safe route since the surgery and I haven’t really been uncomfortable or sick yet. I’ve been so cognizant of it I think that’s why my friend said what she said. I’ve been afraid to eat too much. But that has also caused some anxiety about me questioning if I’m getting enough. I don’t want to lose muscle. I don’t want to get sick from lack of nutrients. I gotta say that if I had known this before I wouldn’t have had the surgery. I’m sure that I’ll laugh at that statement in a few months or years when I look back at this. But right now all I can think about is this feeling I have that I’ll never be able to eat more than a tiny piece of food again. I’d rather be obese and take my chances and be happier than miserable and not obese. Sounds awful but that’s the goins on. Anyhoo, thanks for the response. It does help.

You will definitely be able to eat more later. And you're being medically supervised through this process, right? Your doctor will be checking your bloodwork regularly to make sure your nutritional needs are being met. You have Protein goals to hit (and you can track your food to make sure you get there every day). You're taking a bariatric Multivitamin. Also, you don't have to eat more at one sitting to up your calories. You can add an extra snack or even an extra meal, if necessary. You shouldn't have to live with so much anxiety. Have you talked this over with your doctor? It might be a good idea to track your food carefully for a few days, then call and go over it with the nutritionist or nurse on your bariatric team. Any surgical intervention carries risks. But there's risk associated with remaining the size you are now too (said by someone who had a BMI of 47 not that long ago). At least the risk you've taken will pay off down the road with better health, a better quality of life and hopefully a longer life.

[Pilot my best self 50]

9 hours ago, Mike Long said:

Thank you. I think you’re right and I will talk with her again to clarify some of things she mentioned. She didn’t tell me to run out to Mickey D’s and get a double quarter pounder meal. But I also think that she probably meant that I should do the “testing” when I’m actually on regular foods after I’ve healed. She’s been extremely successful and leads a very large Bariatric help group. I should’ve had her clarify before posing the question here. I feel like a little kid getting scolded for having candy before dinner lol

I think this is great topic and am learning lots. It is making me focus on the amount now instead of waiting for what I used to feel when full. Though I am getting a little freaked out that any restriction could damage my new stomach.
tonight I tried fish. Now on my list of textured foods. After just a few small bites my chest felt so uncomfortable- I think it was just too dense. I can’t imagine my stomach was actually full - I kept burping to try to relieve it without success (we’re all friends here, right?). Took about 10 minutes to resolve. It was the most uncomfortable feeling I’ve had. So I will probably go back to purées for a day or two.