LGBTQIA?

[Maryuumah 27]

Is there not an LGBTQ community here? Seems like there should be one....

[AZhiker 2,251]

13 minutes ago, Maryuumah said:

Is there not an LGBTQ community here? Seems like there should be one....

WHY? Weight loss surgery is weight loss surgery, with the same challenges and victories for everyone. We don't need to know someone's race, age, gender, or sexual preference to offer encouragement, advice, and support.

[Maryuumah 27]

Because for instance, there is statistical evidence that lesbians have higher rates of obesity than straight women and more issues with other addictive behaviors, such as smoking. This may indicate a different level of support is needed and I see a lot of posts about families where people with chosen family may not feel as included. I’m not asking to start trouble, I’m asking because I am a lesbian, and would want to reach out to others who may have had issues like these. This forum is about WLS support, right?

Also, while we’re on the subject, I write healthcare grants regularly on the subject of people dealing with comorbidities/co-occurring disorders and since you brought up race and ethnicity, there are also studies that show we (people of color) have higher rates of obesity, hypertension, diabetes and other issues. Seems like a weight loss forum like this one may be a good place for people to safely discuss that part of their journey.

Part of my own work in taking the step to WLS was understanding how my genetics and family make up play a part in my weight gain. Also understanding and coming to terms with my own sexuality was part of my weight gain.

My question is, why is this threatening/upsetting (the caps) to you? I’m curious about your reaction to what seems a pretty normal question.

I’ve recently been sleeved, and am just at my 2 week mark from surgery. I’m down 21 lbs. today.

[catwoman7 10,844]

they have an LGBTQIA subforum over at Obesity Help, but I don't know how active it is anymore (Bariatric Pal is definitely the more active of these two (general) forums, but I think in general, a lot of people are using Facebook groups these days. I prefer these types of forums, though...). Another option is to start one here - I know there have been other LGBTIA members here on BP in the past - there may still be a few who are current (and active) members.

[bufbills 314]

Ugh

[Recidivist 1,141]

4 hours ago, AZhiker said:

WHY? Weight loss surgery is weight loss surgery, with the same challenges and victories for everyone. We don't need to know someone's race, age, gender, or sexual preference to offer encouragement, advice, and support.

I'm a gay man who agrees with AZHiker. The advice and support I've received here have been invaluable. I don't consider my sexual orientation at all relevant to those discussions.

Two points of disagreement with AZHiker: I do think that age and gender can be relevant to our weight loss journeys. Men tend to lose weight differently (and more quickly) than women, and older people also face different challenges than younger ones. (I had surgery at age 59.)

[Darktowerdream 419]

I've not posted in a while but

People on the Autism spectrum also have higher rates of issues with food and weight and metabolism and digestive disorders. But I don't think I'd be on a forum specific to Autism even though I am on the spectrum. I also live with lifelong chronic illness and disability, Myalgic Encephalomyelitis, many medical conditions including pcos, adult onset congenital adrenal hyperplasia ...

is it necessary to have a forum specific to these or to just focus the weight loss journey itself? Men and women might have some different caloric and Protein needs and also based on age and current weight (example calculating protein intake based on weight)

but otherwise the weight loss journey itself is similar for everyone. Unless it's specific medical conditions for example I literally am unable to exercise without causing physical symptoms and damage. So I have to adapt how I do things. But we all still share a similar path.

I answer only because you seem to think that if someone says why, that somehow means they feel threatened or upset by your question.

In the grand scheme of things it's just not a big part of the weight loss journey. The subject isn't taboo it can be discussed any time. But doesn't play much of a role in why we are here.

Edited December 28, 2020 by Darktowerdream

[Maryuumah 27]

Not at all. That was the impression I got from the previous comment, that they were offended by my question. I don’t get that impression from your comment, and I welcome yours and others’ input.

I do agree that we all have similar weight loss journeys physically, but I guess I am also looking for support that is emotionally, culturally, and psychologically in sync; in the same way that experiences with weight loss can be supportive when someone has had the same surgery or is the same body type, it can be very helpful (to me) to have someone who is aligned with you in other ways. The kind of family I have is part of that, while it may not be for others.

Thank you for your perspective.

[Maryuumah 27]

23 minutes ago, Recidivist said:

I'm a gay man who agrees with AZHiker. The advice and support I've received here have been invaluable. I don't consider my sexual orientation at all relevant to those discussions.

Two points of disagreement with AZHiker: I do think that age and gender can be relevant to our weight loss journeys. Men tend to lose weight differently (and more quickly) than women, and older people also face different challenges than younger ones. (I had surgery at age 59.)

I’m excited to be a part of this forum, and look forward to reading more posts.

thanks for sharing your views.

[Maryuumah 27]

1 hour ago, catwoman7 said:

they have an LGBTQIA subforum over at Obesity Help, but I don't know how active it is anymore (Bariatric Pal is definitely the more active of these two (general) forums, but I think in general, a lot of people are using Facebook groups these days. I prefer these types of forums, though...). Another option is to start one here - I know there have been other LGBTIA members here on BP in the past - there may still be a few who are current (and active) members.

Thank you for letting me know. Appreciate you taking the time to share!

[Hop_Scotch 1,625]

1 hour ago, bufbills said:

Ugh

???

[bufbills 314]

19 minutes ago, Hop_Scotch said:

???

I thought I found a forum without these kinds of discussions. I'm a gun guy. I don't want a gun group here. Obviously, just an example. We are all here because we have had, are contemplating, or are in the process of of a weight loss surgery. Thats it. I love this forum because we are all different, but the same. In this age of political everything, I for one, enjoy the rare unity that seems to prevail here. I just think the idea is counterproductive. I love reading everybodys advice, experiences, stories, and opinions. For me, it brings all of us together, without any labels. I personally need a place like this. We all do right now.

[kristieshannon 1,538]

I’m sorry your aren’t getting a particularly friendly welcome to the forum! I agree, affinity groups can be very a very important part of the process! If you have a question as it relates to your particular place in life, it is likely someone else has that same question. To those posting rude responses, I would encourage you to just move along from any topic you don’t feel relates to you.

[Maryuumah 27]

3 minutes ago, kristieshannon said:

I’m sorry your aren’t getting a particularly friendly welcome to the forum! I agree, affinity groups can be very a very important part of the process! If you have a question as it relates to your particular place in life, it is likely someone else has that same question. To those posting rude responses, I would encourage you to just move along from any topic you don’t feel relates to you.

Hi Kristie,

i think your comment is for me, please forgive my responding if not. Thank you, for your kindness; this whole thread has frankly made me quite sad tonight and your post was a ray of hope. I felt pretty misunderstood.

I really appreciate you reaching out and taking the time to post; affinity groups have been very helpful to me in the past and I did hope that I would be able to discuss these intersections of experiences/backgrounds as it relates to my original weight gain, my decision to have WLS, and my plan to keep on track with weight loss and weight stability.

Thanks again. Look forward to reading more posts in this forum and trust that I will learn a lot from those who are further in their health paths than I. Good night.

[catwoman7 10,844]

55 minutes ago, bufbills said:

I thought I found a forum without these kinds of discussions. I'm a gun guy. I don't want a gun group here. Obviously, just an example. We are all here because we have had, are contemplating, or are in the process of of a weight loss surgery. Thats it. I love this forum because we are all different, but the same. In this age of political everything, I for one, enjoy the rare unity that seems to prevail here. I just think the idea is counterproductive. I love reading everybodys advice, experiences, stories, and opinions. For me, it brings all of us together, without any labels. I personally need a place like this. We all do right now.

it's important to some people, though, and that's OK!