friends?

[Emma809 89]

I have a wierd feeling after i get better and all this has pass.... I feel im going to need new friends... cuz not alot of people understand what your going thru ...all i keep hearing ..OH UR GOING TO BE SKINNY ... OH UR NOT GOING TO EAT NOTHING ANYMORE....

so im a bit sick of hearing this.... Has anyone expierence this in there current life?

or am i over thinking🤷🏽‍♀️

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[Healthy_life2 8,319]

25 minutes ago, Emma809 said:

I have a wierd feeling after i get better and all this has pass.... I feel im going to need new friends... cuz not alot of people understand what your going thru ...all i keep hearing ..OH UR GOING TO BE SKINNY ... OH UR NOT GOING TO EAT NOTHING ANYMORE....

so im a bit sick of hearing this.... Has anyone expierence this in there current life?

or am i over thinking🤷🏽‍♀️

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Emma this is going to be a strange ride.

Keep supportive people around you and decide what relationships need to be distanced or cut off. Weight loss may end up being a topic for a while in your social circles. The good news, once your weight loss settles and the shock of your loss is over. Life becomes normal. people just except this as you.

[Emma809 89]

Emma this is going to be a strange ride.
Keep supportive people around you and decide what relationships need to be distanced or cut off. Weight loss may end up being a topic for a while in your social circles. The good news, once your weight loss settles and the shock of your loss is over. Life becomes normal. people just except this as you.

thank you 🥰[emoji106]

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[SabrinaGoddess 101]

3 hours ago, Emma809 said:

I have a wierd feeling after i get better and all this has pass.... I feel im going to need new friends... cuz not alot of people understand what your going thru ...all i keep hearing ..OH UR GOING TO BE SKINNY ... OH UR NOT GOING TO EAT NOTHING ANYMORE....

so im a bit sick of hearing this.... Has anyone expierence this in there current life?

or am i over thinking🤷🏽‍♀️

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No you are not overthinking. When I was banded in 2009 (unbanded in 2012) That's all I heard from people. Christmas Party...Oh you are not going to be able to eat....Office Birthday...Oh you can't have a cupcake...

They said it like I was on punishment or something! LOL And to be very very honest. I lost a LOT of so-called friends. Your circles will change because your life will change and sometimes that means some people have to go.

[Emma809 89]

No you are not overthinking. When I was banded in 2009 (unbanded in 2012) That's all I heard from people. Christmas Party...Oh you are not going to be able to eat....Office Birthday...Oh you can't have a cupcake...
They said it like I was on punishment or something! LOL And to be very very honest. I lost a LOT of so-called friends. Your circles will change because your life will change and sometimes that means some people have to go.

sooooo true

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[AJ Tylo 1,398]

Yes the head games will start, Obviously food is a big part of all of our lives, or it was or we would not be in the FATTY forum. Sorry but i don't beat around the bush. I had the same thing from a group of people, I was a big dude and Happy hour was a common occurrence, 14 oz Steaks, Ribs and tons of Vodka got me into this mess.

I carried the weight well but was killing myself and I decided to make this decision for myself. I will admit my social life in terms of bars, eating out, and large cookouts has slowed down. One of the girls i see really hit it home with her view of this, People are intrigued by it, It is interesting to them, as you succeed they get jealous, not from the weight lose but you setting a goal and hammering it home, She has played a major role in this journey and works in the mental health industry. Build a shell and be the ice queen, I let most of the comments to just role by, but at times you may have to nicely speak up. My famous line is - There has to be something better to talk about then me getting gutted and 5 months of hell! This usually ends it quickly

I have the same friends and people I hang out with it just has changed, You have to take my attitude, F@#Ck food and screw anyone who has a view on your decision to get happy and healthy. You are the one suffering at times, working hard, Cleaning up your life,

However be careful, one thing i have found is that the way people eat and drink is disgusting, just keep your views to yourself, I made a comment a few weeks back when 50 chicken wings came to the table that was uncalled for. I quickly made a joke of it but realized I am not totally ready to be in certain situations.

As for the holidays - I have chosen to be here for many more holidays healthy, then just a few eating Cookies and santa treats.

[Emma809 89]

Yes the head games will start, Obviously food is a big part of all of our lives, or it was or we would not be in the FATTY forum. Sorry but i don't beat around the bush. I had the same thing from a group of people, I was a big dude and Happy hour was a common occurrence, 14 oz Steaks, Ribs and tons of Vodka got me into this mess.
I carried the weight well but was killing myself and I decided to make this decision for myself. I will admit my social life in terms of bars, eating out, and large cookouts has slowed down. One of the girls i see really hit it home with her view of this, People are intrigued by it, It is interesting to them, as you succeed they get jealous, not from the weight lose but you setting a goal and hammering it home, She has played a major role in this journey and works in the mental health industry. Build a shell and be the ice queen, I let most of the comments to just role by, but at times you may have to nicely speak up. My famous line is - There has to be something better to talk about then me getting gutted and 5 months of hell! This usually ends it quickly
I have the same friends and people I hang out with it just has changed, You have to take my attitude, F@#Ck food and screw anyone who has a view on your decision to get happy and healthy. You are the one suffering at times, working hard, Cleaning up your life,
However be careful, one thing i have found is that the way people eat and drink is disgusting, just keep your views to yourself, I made a comment a few weeks back when 50 chicken wings came to the table that was uncalled for. I quickly made a joke of it but realized I am not totally ready to be in certain situations.
As for the holidays - I have chosen to be here for many more holidays healthy, then just a few eating Cookies and santa treats.

wow....truely wow im speechless....I was kind of the same...after work buffalo wings.... after work some drinks and eat out...not recently all i keep hearing is now we r only goin to order one entree....or we are going to order from the kids menu.... or how much u weight consistantly and so since last week i stop answering to texts.... i feel bad but im getting a bit annoyed and feel no one understands what ur really going thru ...tired of hearing so u cant eat ...and then a lil giggle .... for me its not even funny at all.... to add i didnt tell alot of people.... none of my family knows what i did..."NONE" not even my mom ...only my son.... and 3 people i know i felt the less people i told the better

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[AJ Tylo 1,398]

Yes its a b***h - I told no one till recently when they thought i had Cancer or Aids! I still lie my ass off and try to avoid the surgery topic, I have seen once you Hammer the weight down and get close to the weight you want to be at it seems to die off a little, They loose focus and seem to be on to the next topic. As for how much weight you lost texts? No clue working on my health not really my weight -

The kids menu and the other snide comments role off eventually, I was getting annoyed but just let it slide by, Not worth getting aggravated over it. My X wife is large and she is the biggest pain in my ass i have, Don;t get me wrong we are good friends but this surgery/lifestyle change has her all wound up. Comments come non stop and i get freakin defensive and mean at times, But now i just role it off with one easy statement "Had to do it, Obviously only one of us is going to live longer to finish raising the kids and see grandkids, Eat out - Be alone, Got your carb fix for the day?" -

It gets better people chill out just ride out this wave of aggravation, Plus its Friday and here we go Happy hour and lots of **** food and junk and vodka -

[lvidacovich 372]

This fear is one of the reasons that I told very few people. My closest 4 couple friends, 4 people at work and my parents/sister/wife. That's it. No one else needs to know. That group gives me all the support I need.

I don't need people telling me what I can and can't eat. In fact I'm going to actively avoid most office food stuff now - pot lucks, xmas parties, etc. At least for a year or so. I avoided them before but because I was fat and ate too much so at least it won't look different haha

[Emma809 89]

This fear is one of the reasons that I told very few people. My closest 4 couple friends, 4 people at work and my parents/sister/wife. That's it. No one else needs to know. That group gives me all the support I need.
I don't need people telling me what I can and can't eat. In fact I'm going to actively avoid most office food stuff now - pot lucks, xmas parties, etc. At least for a year or so. I avoided them before but because I was fat and ate too much so at least it won't look different haha

im still trying to decide if i tell my mom im still pretty ill...in pain .... eat super lil...i jus want to be in peace ..and not to be asked 50,000 questions its a bit annoyin at times...but yes this group is helping me alot i mean alot.... pretty happy abt it... im going to be the same avoid alot of parties or any event cuz i bet here start the staring..lol have a blessed day 🥰[emoji106]

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[Emma809 89]

Yes its a b***h - I told no one till recently when they thought i had Cancer or Aids! I still lie my ass off and try to avoid the surgery topic, I have seen once you Hammer the weight down and get close to the weight you want to be at it seems to die off a little, They loose focus and seem to be on to the next topic. As for how much weight you lost texts? No clue working on my health not really my weight -
The kids menu and the other snide comments role off eventually, I was getting annoyed but just let it slide by, Not worth getting aggravated over it. My X wife is large and she is the biggest pain in my ass i have, Don;t get me wrong we are good friends but this surgery/lifestyle change has her all wound up. Comments come non stop and i get freakin defensive and mean at times, But now i just role it off with one easy statement "Had to do it, Obviously only one of us is going to live longer to finish raising the kids and see grandkids, Eat out - Be alone, Got your carb fix for the day?" -
It gets better people chill out just ride out this wave of aggravation, Plus its Friday and here we go Happy hour and lots of **** food and junk and vodka -

Right now i jus want to feel good again ... if along the way i continue to loose weight then so be it... but im not obsess with it either...... im pretty happy abt this group support it helps alot... a friend recommended to me the best idea ever...have a blessed day 🥰[emoji106]

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[Nonnaof4 54]

It's definitely a big change and food seems to be the common denominator among friends, family, holidays etc. There will always be people that will scrutinize everything you're eating or not eating. Sometimes I think its because they didn't have the guts to make the serious lifestyle change. If those "friends" cannot understand that you're doing this to better your life then maybe they aren't really your friends.

Good luck on your journey!!!

[Krimsonbutterflies 661]

On 11/8/2019 at 4:20 AM, Emma809 said:

wow....truely wow im speechless....I was kind of the same...after work buffalo wings.... after work some drinks and eat out...not recently all i keep hearing is now we r only goin to order one entree....or we are going to order from the kids menu.... or how much u weight consistantly and so since last week i stop answering to texts.... i feel bad but im getting a bit annoyed and feel no one understands what ur really going thru ...tired of hearing so u cant eat ...and then a lil giggle .... for me its not even funny at all.... to add i didnt tell alot of people.... none of my family knows what i did..."NONE" not even my mom ...only my son.... and 3 people i know i felt the less people i told the better

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Amen