Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Dating after surgery and weight loss



Recommended Posts

I can't comment after surgery but I can after weight loss (which obviously I regained). I reached a weight I was happy at, not in the healthy weight range for BMI, but I was curvy and fitted a size 12 (Australian). Losing the weight gave me the confidence to put myself back out there, as it were. I put a profile on a dating site, had some contacts, didn't meet too many, but there was one who I was quite taken with...we were together for about nine years. That relationship finished up March last year. With the weight loss and improved self confidence, I was happy to wear fitted clothes in lovely colours not the baggy shapeless clothes in dark or dreary I tended to wear.

I know there are plenty of people with the confidence to put themselves out there regardless of what they weigh, not me, I practically become a recluse. For the period of time I kept most of the weight off I was quite confident and social. I wish I had that confidence, that self believe in myself regardless of what a number on the scales say.

I think confidence is an attractive trait and people respond to it in a positive way. With confidence we stand tall, we smile at strangers, most strangers (including service staff such as shop workers) reactive positively to people who smile, who don't slouch etc.

And to be fair to the opposite sex, there are plenty of men who love a confident (or not) woman regardless of what she weighs.

Sorry for waffle!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On 4/30/2018 at 10:36 PM, TaylorMade4One said:

Interested in hearing if dating is easier, better or different after surgery and weight loss? Have you met a new boo? I'm all ears! 🤔emoji41.pngemoji101.pngemoji101.png

Im still single AF...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

3 minutes ago, TaylorMade4One said:


Are you interested in dating?

I really thought I would hear some great love stories!

I am interested but not in what dating currently is, i was born either 50 years too early or 50 years too late. i have antiquated ideas about relationships. I refuse the hook up culture.

SO...

Im single AF...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I’m single AF too [emoji23]


Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Single AF. Still overweight. Recently joined tinder but the men only seem to want hook ups.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Speaking as a happily married man, I have found that post op I am far more active and involved in activities. With that increased exposure, flirting and being asked out happens incredibly frequently. It is to the point that my kids have even started piping up and telling the women that I am married. Just bluntly blurting "He's married." if they see anything they consider flirtatious.

It always seems to happen when I am most oblivious or I am doing something not generally associated with looking for attention. At the gym, taking the kids shopping, asking for help in a store, asking directions... just average mundane daily activities. How you carry yourself makes a huge impact on people.

@LaLaDee your profile pic is beautiful, I'm betting you are getting flirted with and may not be realizing it yet.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

8 hours ago, BigViffer said:

Speaking as a happily married man, I have found that post op I am far more active and involved in activities. With that increased exposure, flirting and being asked out happens incredibly frequently. It is to the point that my kids have even started piping up and telling the women that I am married. Just bluntly blurting "He's married." if they see anything they consider flirtatious.

It always seems to happen when I am most oblivious or I am doing something not generally associated with looking for attention. At the gym, taking the kids shopping, asking for help in a store, asking directions... just average mundane daily activities. How you carry yourself makes a huge impact on people.

@LaLaDee your profile pic is beautiful, I'm betting you are getting flirted with and may not be realizing it yet.

Thanks. Lol. You’re such a great guy! No wonder the ladies are flirting with you!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I just had a break up about a month ago with the guy that I was with pre and post surgery, but I've already thought about dating again. I think it will be a lot different as a sleeved person, mostly logistics wise--I'm already thinking about suggesting coffee dates over food dates, or dates that involve no food at all! I look a lot better on the outside, but inside I'm still super shy and introverted, so it's probably going to be just as difficult :P

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Looking forward to hearing some stories in his as well. Single AF and holding out hope.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Bat your eyes flirtingly, purr in a soft bedroom type voice, "You show me yours and I'll show you mine" and it will be like Fireworks exploding over the Sydney Opera House! Good ON and for YOU! 😜

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Another thought to brighten your Sunday and future.
There is nothing wrong with enjoying a man's atention. The real problem comes when 9 months later it results in contractions!👩👶👨

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Still purging all of the larger clothing. This morning, a shirt that I ADORED wearing ended up on top. Hard to let it go, but it was also hard to let go of those habits that also no longer serve my highest good. Onward and upward!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Onedayatatime365

      Looking to connect with others who are also on the journey of better health. Post-Op Gastric Sleeve (4/11/24).
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • jparadigm

      Happy Wednesday!
       
      I hope everyone is having a lovely week so far! 
      It's been a bit of a struggle this last week...I'm hungry ALL the time.
      · 1 reply
      1. BlondePatriotInCDA

        Have a great Wednesday too! Sorry you're hungry all the time, I'm pretty much the same..and I'm sick of eating the same food all the time.

    • ChunkCat

      Well, tomorrow I go in for an impromptu hiatal hernia repair after ending up in the ER over the weekend because I couldn't get food down and water was moving at a trickle... I've been having these symptoms on and off for a few weeks but Sunday was the worst by far and came with chest pain and trouble breathing. The ER PA thinks it is just esophagitis and that the surgeon and radiologist are wrong. But the bariatric surgeon swears it is a hernia, possibly a sliding one based on my symptoms. So he fit me into his schedule this week to repair it! I hope he's right and this sorts it out. He's going to do a scope afterwards to be sure there is nothing wrong with the esophagus. Here's hoping it all goes well!!
      · 4 replies
      1. AmberFL

        omgsh!! Hope all goes well!! Keeping you in my thoughts!

      2. gracesmommy2

        Hope you’re doing well!

      3. NickelChip

        I hope it goes well! Sending positive thoughts for a speedy recovery!

      4. AmberFL

        How are you doing? any update?!

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×