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Am I the only one who gets annoyed by the question Why?



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On 9/23/2017 at 4:12 PM, StephersSweet said:

One of my supervisors kinda has a big mouth and it very quickly became the topic of conversation in my office. -_-

HOOOLEE crap! You need to contact your HR department immediately. Seriously. Major FMLA and ADA violations. You may even want to consider talking to an attorney or the EEoC. Or both.

http://www.fmlainsights.com/disclosing-an-employees-medical-condition-may-result-in-an-automatic-fmla-violation/

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6 hours ago, Wumbo said:

HOOOLEE crap! You need to contact your HR department immediately. Seriously. Major FMLA and ADA violations. You may even want to consider talking to an attorney or the EEoC. Or both.

I don't think it's that serious yet, I want to be open about my surgery and that way I can be a success, I want people to know that this is a tool to help you with your life if your in the same situation. I don't mind that it came out in the office, it's about a 75%-25% positive to negative feedback from the people in the office who found out. To the negative 25% I'm sure they have their reasons but I can't wait to see their faces as I slowly turn into a skinny human lol

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15 minutes ago, StephersSweet said:

I can't wait to see their faces as I slowly turn into a skinny human

Hear, hear to that!

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22 hours ago, NZFinallyFree said:

I told only my sister as she had a bypass a while back and it essentially reversed her diabetes and saved her life - she was in and out of hospital with obesity related health issues and spent most of her life in a chair watching TV before the surgery. I did not want to go down the same path and already had BP and small mobility issues.

It turns out very easy to explain WL thus far as it is only early days but I make it well known I am on a 'Health Kick' - ha ha nothing new there must have done this hundreds of times over the years! I also say I am really focusing on portion size. People don't seem to notice what you eat if you don't draw attention to it. My Dr does not advocate liquid diets either pre or post op past the first 3 days so it was really easy to appear normal.

As a relatively low BMI (34) to start with, I know I would have got a lot of negativity - besides I am a very private person and don't feel the need to share this. I have this forum now to turn to and enjoy reading the different stories. I am sure people would say it was a cop out to have WLS or question me as to why I didn't just suck it up and lose weight alone. Well I have done this so many times before and each time I do I put it all back on and more and to be honest weight control has been in control of me almost all my life! I am a self pay and every cent is worth it so far - I agonised for months over the decision to do this and I am so glad I did.

Thanks for your post. My BMI now is 31 (pre surgery), but has been as high as 40, and as low as 24 in the last 7 years. Myriad of health issues, plus hitting 65 and as my friend said, I need to control my body with this great tool, as my body has controlled me too much. Had pen heart surgery, which failed within 6 months. So glad no one is saying I'm too light weight for surgery. Health really is so important, and I want to see grandkids grow up!

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7 hours ago, LillieDuFran said:

Thanks for your post. My BMI now is 31 (pre surgery), but has been as high as 40, and as low as 24 in the last 7 years. Myriad of health issues, plus hitting 65 and as my friend said, I need to control my body with this great tool, as my body has controlled me too much. Had pen heart surgery, which failed within 6 months. So glad no one is saying I'm too light weight for surgery. Health really is so important, and I want to see grandkids grow up!

When is your surgery? I am sure you can't wait. You will find it such a great tool as your friend suggests. I am finding it so wonderful to have a control over my intake I never had and look forward to stopping the yo-yo nightmare. Health I agree is the most important thing of all!

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8 hours ago, NZFinallyFree said:

When is your surgery? I am sure you can't wait. You will find it such a great tool as your friend suggests. I am finding it so wonderful to have a control over my intake I never had and look forward to stopping the yo-yo nightmare. Health I agree is the most important thing of all!

My surgery is week from today, 10/5, at 9:15. I have pre op this am. I am OCD/over organized and working on populating my take every where calendar with enough info to get me through to regular foods on 12/2. Of course, regular means a bit different. I am NOT sad to let go of popcorn, although I love it. It's an indigestible food & with colectomy, not a great idea any way, lol

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59 minutes ago, LillieDuFran said:

I am NOT sad to let go of popcorn, although I love it. It's an indigestible food & with colectomy, not a great idea any way, lol

Popcorn is one of my all time favorite Snacks. I found out that even the light options have palm oil in them which is carcinogenic and gave it up completely. I miss popcorn though.

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I told my supervisor at work and yesterday she told me that she had thought I was too self confident to need it and was surprised that I had low self esteem. WTF? I specifically let her know when I told her it was for medical reasons and never said anything about my looks or my self-esteem LOL. I tried to set her straight when we were talking but I'm not sure she got it. In addition I'm also worried that it's going to get around the office and it will be her who starts talking about it.


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1 hour ago, Angelnrs said:

I told my supervisor at work and yesterday she told me that she had thought I was too self confident to need it and was surprised that I had low self esteem. WTF? I specifically let her know when I told her it was for medical reasons and never said anything about my looks or my self-esteem LOL. I tried to set her straight when we were talking but I'm not sure she got it. In addition I'm also worried that it's going to get around the office and it will be her who starts talking about it.

If she's anything like my supervisor she'll be a chatty cathy and the whole office will already know.

One thing I love about my supervisor is how supportive she's been which is another reason I don't mind that she told other people because now upper management knows and they can't punish me for taking excessive time off for all of these pre op appointments. Also she wants to be my personal cheerleader and work out buddy so that's pretty cool.

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On 9/28/2017 at 8:03 AM, Angelnrs said:

I told my supervisor at work and yesterday she told me that she had thought I was too self confident to need it and was surprised that I had low self esteem. WTF? I specifically let her know when I told her it was for medical reasons and never said anything about my looks or my self-esteem LOL. I tried to set her straight when we were talking but I'm not sure she got it. In addition I'm also worried that it's going to get around the office and it will be her who starts talking about it.

Before I had the surgery, I would tell some people I met on dating sites and they would tell me, "Oh you don't need it! You're beautiful all ready!" I just wanted to reach through my computer and strangle them. Dude, I didn't have the surgery to be "more beautiful," I had it so I could have my life back, do the things I want to do, and not worry about dying before my 40th birthday.

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I get super annoyed by the why?. Then when you answer they have suggestion on diets to try. I have been on every diet known to man lol and I wasn't able to stick with it or I loss the weight temporarily and gain it back.

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Anyone who thinks getting half your stomach cut off and pulled out a hole above your belly button and then be told "now get used to eating like that" is EASY can kiss my once fatter ass.


Best response ever!!! Thank you.

Sent from my XT1635-01 using BariatricPal mobile app

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On 9/21/2017 at 8:19 AM, StephersSweet said:

Seriously though, any time you venture into the subject of WLS surgery and someone asks you why? I just get annoyed by it at this point. So I tell them I'm morbidly obese which leads to the "why don't you go to the gym, why don't you try this new diet, why would you want to do something so crazy when there are better ways to lose weight it just takes hard work?" Then I tell them about all the fad diet programs I've tried, that I go to the gym 4 times a week 1.5 hour each time alternation on strength training and cardio, which leads to more Why questions. Honestly I'm really tired of the why question, I'm all for educating the people around me but 9/10 times there questioning not because they care or want to know but because they think I'm taking the "easy way out", and that really irritates me.

So is anyone else out there sick and tired of explaining themselves?

I don't explain to anyone, it's none of their business.

If they ask you "Why?", just say "Don't worry about it." :P

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.

Edited by monalyssa33
Didn't realize I had responded with the same thing like 2 months ago

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