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I regret this surgery



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find something to engage your mind - and keep you from dwelling on these depressive thoughts you described here


And in an earlier post you said "put off these kind of thoughts..."

That's stuffing. Maybe you meant something else, but QueenTiff is right when she says you just basically told her to stuff her emotions.

Maybe you were never given space to express and process your own emotions. Most men are not. Your interactions on this thread are quite hateful. This could be a good opportunity for you to stop speaking, start listening and processing your own "put off" thoughts so that others around you can have the space to do so too without such harsh criticism.


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In the words of Rodney King..."Can we all just get along?". I hate going into threads and seeing people argue. We are all here to support each other. That is the reason for even developing this site. I was in a thread for Veterans the other day, and it appears a lot of Veterans left because of people forming sides and arguing with each other. There are some threads that people create just purely because they need support and encouraging words. They don't want to feel judged.

Others are trying to help, but come off as judging or putting those people down. I get it. Tough love and all. Let's just agree that QueenTiff's feelings are real feelings, and expressing them here is what she needed to do to maybe find others that feel the same way. We are all different, and go through this experience differently....But let's try to be supportive, and offer advice or our experiences, in a way that is not sugar coated, but empathetic to the user that is asking for help/guidance.

Jaminator, I get that you are trying to be helpful, and I understand what you were trying to say. In my experience, it is not what someone means when they say something, it is the way it is taken by people that receive that information.

I hope we can move forward with empathy and respect toward one another. Man, I sound like this surgery has taken away some of my testosterone! How bout them Cowboys!

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In the words of Rodney King..."Can we all just get along?". I hate going into threads and seeing people argue. We are all here to support each other. That is the reason for even developing this site. I was in a thread for Veterans the other day, and it appears a lot of Veterans left because of people forming sides and arguing with each other. There are some threads that people create just purely because they need support and encouraging words. They don't want to feel judged.
Others are trying to help, but come off as judging or putting those people down. I get it. Tough love and all. Let's just agree that QueenTiff's feelings are real feelings, and expressing them here is what she needed to do to maybe find others that feel the same way. We are all different, and go through this experience differently....But let's try to be supportive, and offer advice or our experiences, in a way that is not sugar coated, but empathetic to the user that is asking for help/guidance.
Jaminator, I get that you are trying to be helpful, and I understand what you were trying to say. In my experience, it is not what someone means when they say something, it is the way it is taken by people that receive that information.
I hope we can move forward with empathy and respect toward one another. Man, I sound like this surgery has taken away some of my testosterone! How bout them Cowboys!




You had me till that last line! Lol!

QueenTiff I hope you're feeling better.

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In the words of Rodney King..."Can we all just get along?". I hate going into threads and seeing people argue. We are all here to support each other. That is the reason for even developing this site. I was in a thread for Veterans the other day, and it appears a lot of Veterans left because of people forming sides and arguing with each other. There are some threads that people create just purely because they need support and encouraging words. They don't want to feel judged.
Others are trying to help, but come off as judging or putting those people down. I get it. Tough love and all. Let's just agree that QueenTiff's feelings are real feelings, and expressing them here is what she needed to do to maybe find others that feel the same way. We are all different, and go through this experience differently....But let's try to be supportive, and offer advice or our experiences, in a way that is not sugar coated, but empathetic to the user that is asking for help/guidance.
Jaminator, I get that you are trying to be helpful, and I understand what you were trying to say. In my experience, it is not what someone means when they say something, it is the way it is taken by people that receive that information.
I hope we can move forward with empathy and respect toward one another. Man, I sound like this surgery has taken away some of my testosterone! How bout them Cowboys!





Go cowboys



Tiffani[emoji1528][emoji757]️[emoji175]

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I'm starting to feel better. I really thank everyone for such love and support. I know I'm not alone I know that this is something people has dealt with, but at this moment when I wrote the post I did feel alone. Moments later I get so many messages saying how people are in the same boat but they are afraid to get shut down. I'm a fighter and I want to be there to help as many people as I can, as people helped me. I'm still fighting I'm still pushing and i thank all of you for you're support


Tiffani

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5 hours ago, QueenTiff said:


Please stop talking please! Like you wanna go all day with me than let's go. I have a lot of frustrations and you're the perfect person to release it on. It can get real ugly. How ugly you willing to go.


Tiffani

Now you're just being rude. We get it, you're upset and frustrated and incredibly sensitive which at the end of the day doesn't excuse you from being just nasty. Stop responding to him, leave it. Can we just get back to being decent to each other?

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It gets better! I know that sounds so cliche but I JUST started to feel better about the surgery and I'm 7 weeks post op.

I was having a hard time adjusting and still do some days. It sucks not being able to go out and eat like before. I've had some cheat days since surgery though. You will be able to eat the foods you enjoy just not yet. They tell you not to because they aren't the healthiest choices, but you can eat them. I just eat in moderation. Also, I can't even eat much.

Let's put it this way...before surgery I could go to McDonald's and get a 10 piece nugget meal large with fries and a coke AND a quarter pound burger and eat it all....f**king terrible right?

Now, I can't even finish 4 chicken nuggets (a happy meal).

While I probably shouldn't be eating this...it's not like I'm eating like I did before.

My fam has made spaghetti and I can only eat a few bites and a couple meatballs and i'm full.

So yeah, I get to eat normal things just not much of it.

And for anyone who is reading this thinking i'm terrible...oh well. Not all of us are perfect patients.

Point is...I don't indulge like I did before...like I was sooo bad before surgery. I'm also not saying to create these bad habits and eat bad all the time, but now and again...you can enjoy yourself.

If I couldn't eat certain things for the rest of my life...it would freaking suck.

Also, my mom brought up a good point to me when I felt regretful after surgery. "Well you've done it honey, and you can't change it or go back. so all you can do is make the best of it now".

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19 hours ago, LittleLizzieLilliput said:

No, you basically told her shes not allowed to express remorse. I read your post, you were judgmental, rude and chastised her for daring to speak negatively while you are waiting for the surgery.

Sorry what? I think you are confused, I am waiting for surgery? You have confused me with the other person, I am 8 weeks post. lol I will help you , the person who made that post about not having surgery yet was Siyaa Ela.

Edited by dreamingsmall

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Now you're just being rude. We get it, you're upset and frustrated and incredibly sensitive which at the end of the day doesn't excuse you from being just nasty. Stop responding to him, leave it. Can we just get back to being decent to each other?


You don't know the whole story so please mind your business.


Tiffani[emoji1528][emoji757]️[emoji175]

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It gets better! I know that sounds so cliche but I JUST started to feel better about the surgery and I'm 7 weeks post op.
I was having a hard time adjusting and still do some days. It sucks not being able to go out and eat like before. I've had some cheat days since surgery though. You will be able to eat the foods you enjoy just not yet. They tell you not to because they aren't the healthiest choices, but you can eat them. I just eat in moderation. Also, I can't even eat much.
Let's put it this way...before surgery I could go to McDonald's and get a 10 piece nugget meal large with fries and a coke AND a quarter pound burger and eat it all....f**king terrible right?
Now, I can't even finish 4 chicken nuggets (a happy meal).
While I probably shouldn't be eating this...it's not like I'm eating like I did before.

My fam has made spaghetti and I can only eat a few bites and a couple meatballs and i'm full.
So yeah, I get to eat normal things just not much of it.

And for anyone who is reading this thinking i'm terrible...oh well. Not all of us are perfect patients.

Point is...I don't indulge like I did before...like I was sooo bad before surgery. I'm also not saying to create these bad habits and eat bad all the time, but now and again...you can enjoy yourself.
If I couldn't eat certain things for the rest of my life...it would freaking suck.
Also, my mom brought up a good point to me when I felt regretful after surgery. "Well you've done it honey, and you can't change it or go back. so all you can do is make the best of it now".


Don't feel terrible about McDonald's before I could literally do the same thing it amazes me how much I could eat. It amazes me how little I can eat now. You're right I don't judge you for eating McDonald's my mom said it changes your stomach not your brain. I don't think it's healthy to not have cheat days so I get it and thank you


Tiffani[emoji1528][emoji757]️[emoji175]

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1 hour ago, QueenTiff said:


You don't know the whole story so please mind your business.


Tiffani

You really are miserable. I wish you peace on your journey. I'm personally quite happy I don't know you in real life. No wonder you are alone, you are moody AF. I read the whole thread before I responded , so I know the whole story that was in the thread. Therapy sounds like a very good idea for you to release this anger, passive aggressiveness and poor me attitude

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21 hours ago, jaminator said:

You're being a whiner. I gave info on how to stop being miserable and move forward by focusing on the end goal. You encouraged her to feel like giving up after three weeks.

ha! No, you got that all wrong. But you continue to prove to be toxic.

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Do you feel better today? I do, which really makes me think there is some (lots) of hormonal involvement. Still hungry faster than I want ...maybe because it is all fluids...but yesterday your post was just what I needed 😃

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You really are miserable. I wish you peace on your journey. I'm personally quite happy I don't know you in real life. No wonder you are alone, you are moody AF. I read the whole thread before I responded , so I know the whole story that was in the thread. Therapy sounds like a very good idea for you to release this anger, passive aggressiveness and poor me attitude



Obviously you're the only miserable one and if you did know me in real life I would tell you the same thing. You're the only negative person here. You just need a voice to say something because you felt entitle. Again you're rude you're annoying you on my **** bye b***h


Tiffani[emoji1528][emoji757]️[emoji175]

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