Sabotaging Myself

[Tessa1988 20]

Let my start by saying before surgery, I had absolutely no self control when it came to food. I lived for what my next meal would be. If I ate pizza, I ate half a large and a box of breadsticks and still had room for dessert and a soda. My diet consisted of probably 70% carbs. So I knew having surgery would be a mental challenge more than anything, but I also didn't intend to never eat a slice of pizza again. I wanted to learn to control my cravings and eat portion sizes that are acceptable. That all being said, I'm 3.5 weeks post op and I already feel I am failing myself. The carb cravings have NOT gone away, and I find that I am able to eat anything. I have eaten Pizza Crust, biscuit, chips, bread. All of it goes down just fine and what's worse, makes me feel satisfied in a way that a stick of cheese or tuna does not. I realize that if I continue this path I won't see the results I want, and having paid for this surgery out of pocket, I do not want it to be wasted. I need help please [emoji24]

[B.Annie 290]

Let my start by saying before surgery, I had absolutely no self control when it came to food. I lived for what my next meal would be. If I ate pizza, I ate half a large and a box of breadsticks and still had room for dessert and a soda. My diet consisted of probably 70% carbs. So I knew having surgery would be a mental challenge more than anything, but I also didn't intend to never eat a slice of pizza again. I wanted to learn to control my cravings and eat portion sizes that are acceptable. That all being said, I'm 3.5 weeks post op and I already feel I am failing myself. The carb cravings have NOT gone away, and I find that I am able to eat anything. I have eaten Pizza Crust, biscuit, chips, bread. All of it goes down just fine and what's worse, makes me feel satisfied in a way that a stick of cheese or tuna does not. I realize that if I continue this path I won't see the results I want, and having paid for this surgery out of pocket, I do not want it to be wasted. I need help please [emoji24]

Whew. Well you're honest with yourself and that's a start. I've heard of people "eating their way through the surgery", but never heard someone admit to it. For that, I'm very glad you posted. Let me start by sharing that I am pre-op so can only relate to being an extreme carb lover who also has a long history of binging. Even saying the word "carb" brings on the most severe head hunger. I assume since you paid out of pocket, you were able to get surgery without any requirements which would aid in preparing you for the limitations so I will start from where you're at now with that assumption. I will seem harsh. Please know I intend to be straight forward because I have to personally hear it myself right now as well due to head hunger.
You have already had the surgery before being mentally prepared. Since you can't change the surgery, your option is to grow up and get a grip on yourself. Or, you can choose to be the proof outsiders need when stereotyping us about finding the easy way out, cheating at losing weight, and being lazy. If you choose to actually work at this, here are a few recommendations.

Tell your doctor. If you can't, join a support group in person asap.

Talk to your PCP about being on a dr monitored diet.

Track ALL calories. Every single thing that goes in your mouth, put in MyFitnessPal and keep your calories at 1200 (I'm personally at 1000).

Step away from carbs. Easier said than done, but if I can do it, so can you.

Understand you have an addiction. Treat it as such. Get rid of all temptations, pre plan your meals, cook at home or bring a meal or shake out with you.

Buy pre cooked GRILLED chicken breast for those moments you don't want to cook. Pop one of those in the microwave and you have an almost instant meal that will dull bad cravings.

Get a nutritionist and remain honest with them.

And finally, for everyone else's sake whose going through the aggravation of educating the masses about how hard we work to be successful at this, please don't contribute to the stereotype and fail. Be stronger than your addiction, tell your head to shut up and keep your hands away from junk. Our minds and bodies are stupid when it comes to this stuff. Consider them your enemy and get back in charge of yourself!

[Tessa1988 20]

"please don't contribute to the stereotype and fail. Be stronger than your addiction"

Thank you for being so candid. I won't lie and say it's what I wanted someone to tell me, but I also won't lie and pretend it didn't need to be said. It's just so much harder than simply "being strong". I'm not strong right now, clearly. But I will try. Thank you

[jwinters19 124]

Cals need to be more around 800 post surgery. All great tools and advice though!! Unfortunately the only thing that will stop the cravings is to cut out bread completely--at least until you reach goal or close to. I am going through the same thing with sugar and I've just promised myself once I'm in maintenance and have more cals to spare, some will go towards dessert.

[Airstream88 361]

You paid out of pocket for this surgery. Why? Did you have health issues? If so, when you want to eat those foods ask yourself this: Is this food worth dying for? If you knew that piece of pizza would kill you the next day, would you still eat it?

I was basically a carb eater pre-op as well. WLS does not prevent you from putting the bad foods in your mouth though it should limit the amount (but it doesn't for slider foods like crackers, chips, etc) That's why you MUST eat your Protein first so your new stomach will feel full. You should not put a carb in your mouth until you have eaten your protein because if you don't you will not be getting the nutrition you need and your body will take it from your muscles.

Edited April 12, 2017 by Airstream88

[ryan_86 335]

I never really understood the relationship between carbs and hunger before surgery. Since surgery, and 124 pounds down, I get it: refined carbs make you hungry. They satisfy me for about 15 minutes, then my blood sugar goes back down and I'm hungry. That's not to say that I never eat them. I think I eat too many, in fact. But I know they're not a solution to hunger, and some I just skip entirely.

[OutsideMatchInside 10,166]

Find a therapist. You are self soothing with food. You will never stop until you get to the root causes of why.

Food isn't the issue here emotions are.

[Joann454 1,329]

I'm preop and definitely needed to read this. Thanks for your honesty.
I really hope you seek all the help you can so you can get healthy.


Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

[Tessa1988 20]

Find a therapist. You are self soothing with food. You will never stop until you get to the root causes of why.
Food isn't the issue here emotions are.

I tend to agree with you. I'm just not sure how to find a therapist or even a support group in my area.

[Tessa1988 20]

You paid out of pocket for this surgery. Why? Did you have health issues? If so, when you want to eat those foods ask yourself this: Is this food worth dying for? If you knew that piece of pizza would kill you the next day, would you still eat it?
I was basically a carb eater pre-op as well. WLS does not prevent you from putting the bad foods in your mouth though it should limit the amount (but it doesn't for slider foods like crackers, chips, etc) That's why you MUST eat your Protein first so your new stomach will feel full. You should not put a carb in your mouth until you have eaten your protein because if you don't you will not be getting the nutrition you need and your body will take it from your muscles.

I paid out of pocket because the surgeon I wanted to see wasn't covered by my insurance. Oddly enough, I know 3 people who have been to that surgeon so I felt comfortable choosing him.

[LosinLiz82316 21]

I haven't read any responses so I might repeat what others have already mentioned...please go see a therapist! It is so important for your well-being. I feel like the mental battle with food is worse than the smaller stomach. At 3.5 weeks I was still on purees so I'm not sure how you are even tolerating solids yet.

My doctor said that for the first 3 months anyone and everyone will lose weight and after that you are on your own because you are eating solid foods. Please see someone so you can get this under control.

[Berry78 4,259]

I'm at 3.5 weeks now. I'm also still on purees. bread and solud meat might actually be dangerous.

If you have insurance, call your insurance company today and ask about covered mental health services and in network providers. They can help you find a counselor. At this point, any counselor will be better than none... as long as they work with eating disorders.

If you don't have insurance that will cover it, then just Google counselors and your town. Call several to get a feel for what is available.

Good luck! Let us know how it goes!

[Tessa1988 20]

Thanks guys. I guess I need to look into a therapist. I live in a small town, so I'm not sure what my options will be but I'll google and see if I can find something. And for those asking, at 2 weeks my surgeon told me I could start eating real food. He said I was free to eat whatever I could tolerate and that I couldn't hurt myself so not to be nervous. I guess every surgeon is different.

[Joann454 1,329]

7 hours ago, Tessa1988 said:

Thanks guys. I guess I need to look into a therapist. I live in a small town, so I'm not sure what my options will be but I'll google and see if I can find something. And for those asking, at 2 weeks my surgeon told me I could start eating real food. He said I was free to eat whatever I could tolerate and that I couldn't hurt myself so not to be nervous. I guess every surgeon is different.

Maybe you could still eat what most surgeons recommend. That won't hurt you either.

I too live in a very small town. Every appointment in an ordeal. My psych consult gave me names of therapists who specialize in eating and each one was over an hour away. So you'll have to decide if you really want this sleeve to be the tool it is supposed to be and help it with other tools. If you can't make long drives for consult then I really suggest following what most surgeons recommend and doing some reading. I am not berating you and I hope it doesn't come off like that. Just hate to see you go through all this just to sabotage yourself. It's not too late to reverse your thinking.

[Sosewsue61 3,185]

Of you can't find a therapist find an Overeaters Anonymous group, go to the library and get books written by eating disorder therapists, ask if your hospital has a wls group or would start one.