Trying Hard Here!

[bariatricmomof2 18]

My "friends and family" on FB are talking about me to my parents as to how I post updates on my weight loss and such every week. They told my parents that they are about to block me because they think I cheated the system by getting this surgery. My parents are snubbing me as well. Why can't I just get support on this? I was sleeved on 12/22 so it's not like I can change my mind now. Besides why would I want to change my mind on bettering myself? OMG this frustrates me to no end. My dad will say if you had just run before then you wouldn't have been obese and needed this surgery. My mom will look at what I eat now and say if you had just ate like this before surgery then you would have fixed the problem a while ago. My highest weight was 270. It was 253 when I got the surgery. It is 223 now just 4 week later! I had chronic gastritis. I had GERD. My heart was starting to harden in 1 of the chambers. I have 2 heart murmurs. My family is well known for high cholesterol, high blood pressure, diabetes, and other things. Did they just want me to wait until I died??

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[emardee 192]

Time to summon that same courage it took for you to get surgery in the first place and tell the FB crowd they should go ahead and block you. Harder to do with family, I know, but with your parents try a sweet smile and an, "Oh I know! But isn't it great that I can be healthy now and for the rest of my life?" It gives them no place to go with their cruelty.

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[tani 105]

I don't have advise about this because I don't post anything about my surgery or weight loss on fb. However, if I did, I would let them unfriend me because. I don't that in my life. When it comes to parents, I only have my mom and grandma. I did not tell my mom until after surgery and I flat out told her to stop being so negative. Grandma was supportive from the beginning.

Bottom line is you don't need negative people in your life. It's not healthy for you even if you didn't get WLS.

[bariatricmomof2 18]

Thank you =) My parents seemed to be supportive before and then had a change of heart after I guess.

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[sarahblu 179]

This is definitely not a quick fix or easy way out!! It makes me sad that people can't be supportive of a choice that is so positive. This surgery is just a kick start to an amazing journey to health and happiness. Just kick butt and prove to yourself that you made the right choice and they will eventually have no choice but to agree with you.

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[bariatricmomof2 18]

Thank you! It makes me sad too =(

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[Morgank 9]

My "friends and family" on FB are talking about me to my parents as to how I post updates on my weight loss and such every week. They told my parents that they are about to block me because they think I cheated the system by getting this surgery. My parents are snubbing me as well. Why can't I just get support on this? I was sleeved on 12/22 so it's not like I can change my mind now. Besides why would I want to change my mind on bettering myself? OMG this frustrates me to no end. My dad will say if you had just run before then you wouldn't have been obese and needed this surgery. My mom will look at what I eat now and say if you had just ate like this before surgery then you would have fixed the problem a while ago. My highest weight was 270. It was 253 when I got the surgery. It is 223 now just 4 week later! I had chronic gastritis. I had GERD. My heart was starting to harden in 1 of the chambers. I have 2 heart murmurs. My family is well known for high cholesterol, high blood pressure, diabetes, and other things. Did they just want me to wait until I died??

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I'm so sorry your family has done this. My family are the only people I told. I share nothing unless I want to. I'm blessed with a supportive family. I did meet an amazing woman in one of my nutrition classes while going through this tough process. Her and I had Rny surgery a month apart. We don't live in the same city but she has been an amazing support. She's like my sister and checks with me,gives me what she learns. Maybe try to meet up with someone going through the same thing. Can't wait to see my surgery sister and Celebrate our success together. You deserve support. It's one of the hardest thing to do. If people think of it as the easy way out.....wow. they have lots to learn! Good luck and best of luck my friend. Keep your head up and stay off Facebook. It will make YOU FEEL FREE!

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[bariatricmomof2 18]

Thank you so much! My husband tries to be supportive but he doesn't understand what I'm going through. I've tried explaining to my parents that this is a hard process time and time again. They don't get it. I saw someone on here who's surgery was the same day as mine! That's pretty cool that I can come on here and know people understand because they are going through the same thing!! I just joined this group 2 days ago and haven't gotten off since =)

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[bill1130 115]

I have told very few people that I will be getting surgery because I'm in sure how they will act about it threw this whole process it has only been my choice I don't need any more negative input about it sooner or later I will put it out in the open and then if people done respect my choice then I or have anything negative it say the they don't have to be part of my new lift ... not one thing have been easy so far I wish more people could see how hard this really is

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[Stephanielp 120]

Let them do what they need to some will be jealous of your success and some just don't understand how much work there is to get the surgery and make it work...just always remember why you got it in the first place...as far as the friends maybe it's time for some new ones...you don't need the negative

progress starts in the mind

[lindz17 17]

I've had a few friends who were concerned, tried to talk me out of it bc it's "a big surgery," tell me I don't really need it bc I'm already beautiful, blah, blah, blah. I had a legit reason for getting sleeved (besides being fat, ha) - my thyroid doesn't work and it is almost impossible for me to lose weight on my own. My friends and family know this, yet they still insisted I might be making the wrong choice. So I asked myself with every piece of information I could find and when they pounced, I attacked back with info, data, facts. I came prepared and that showed them I was dead serious about this.

Some were jealous. One friend came right out and apologized for not being supportive bc she said she wanted to get sleeved but didn't think she could actually go through with it. That's not my problem. I am the queen of quitting things and I made a vow to myself that I would do this 100%, and I am. I'm sorry if you want to take your own woes out on me. It won't phase me.

Everyone came around and ended up being supportive when they realized that this really was a good thing. And when I told them I'm down 10 lbs in a week? It really hit home.

Bottom line - arm yourself with info, be confident, and show them amazing results. You're doing this for YOU. Your support team is on this website. We're all here for each other!

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[bdjennings1957 2]

Stay off Facebook and stick to forums like this. No one can possibly understand unless they have experienced it. Hopefully you can find a buddy in your support group meetings and you can lean on each other. I don't talk about my journey on Facebook at all. The only people who know I have had the procedure are family. It's really no one else's business. It's personal.

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[kmalcom28 29]

Love yourself enough to not care what they think. Block those that are gossiping to your parents. You don't have to block them from Facebook but there is a way to block them from seeing those posts. Surround yourself with people that love AND support you. If someone is acting contradictory to that then stay away.

[4MRB4PHOTO 3,899]

Tell your friends and family how you feel and why what they are saying hurts you.

If necessary, distance yourself a little from the people who are doing this to you.

We don't need toxic people in our lives.

Stay positive. You are doing a great job losing your excess weight.

Edited January 18, 2017 by 4MRB4PHOTO

[bariatricmomof2 18]

Thank you soo much everyone! This really helps me a lot! My mom won't tell me who said it. I have a feeling it's my brother and sister though since they are skinny already and 1 is in the military. Lucky them. That's not me. I will stay off FB with that and just post about my wonderful 2 kids =) I am soo soo glad I found this group!!

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