CAN you eat vs SHOULD you eat

[OutsideMatchInside 10,166]

A lot of people think the sleeve or even the bypass will prevent them from eating certain things.

The thing is even with surgery. food addictions will make people eat things they shouldn't ignoring pain and discomfort.

Nothing but not wanting to is going to stop people from eating things.

I purposely chose the sleeve over the band and the bypass because it offered the most normal life post op. I knew I would be able to eat basically anything if I didn't have complications. That was the appeal of the sleeve.

After months of eating healthy and getting results from it. I never want to go back to eating how I did before. Not even a little bit. The benefits of losing weight and being small far out weigh the taste of any food. Yet, I don't feel deprived at all because the sleeve helped me change my attitude about food.

I hope that more people can make the life changing mental changes with food that are really the key to success. Surgery, the physical part is such a small fleeting thing.

[ShelterDog64 2,364]

@@Ssze1109 Why does self pay = no pre-op education, no post-op support? If I were paying out of pocket, I'd demand support.

I don't know why my post is "sad" to you, I'm merely trying to explain that you CAN eat everything, it's whether you SHOULD that really matters. If that's "sad", then I don't know what to say to make you feel better.

[mrglover3 0]

Ssze1109 that was very well said!!! I am at the airport now coming from California (where I just had surgery) back to my home and someone referred this site and others and the responses to some comments made me feel that perhaps this is not the right spot for me. I am self pay (well my job paid cash) so I don't have as much information as I would like regarding "after surgery" most of my knowledge was researched on everything up to surgery date. All I could think of was how much I wanted it and find my self like the fish who escaped in finding Nemo "now what" so I thought that I would join others to see things to eat that worked well for others. If I was eating right, healthy, proportioned, etc I would not have needed the surgery. I have made it thru the surgery 4days ago) and feel like I'm going to be that one gaining it back when I lose finally lose it from ratings habits I failed to properly correct

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[Sai 785]

It's like an alcoholic---just because he is in the 12 step program doesn't mean he knows it all or can control it.

They go to seek advice and help -so do some here.

No one is perfect and yes they might need justification but maybe that is their coping mechanism that they are working thru. Let's hope they are successful with whatever coping mechanisms work for them (instead of food)

Addicts tend to use self-pity to make excuses for their behavior, to justify it, to rationalize it... So that's why I refuse to give anybody more reasons to play the victim role. They'll use that victim role to justify their actions. Making excuses for them, not calling out their coping mechanisms = being an enabler. They will flourish in self-pity, and we already know self-pity is extremely toxic. I wouldn't add to it. Addicts need straight answers to know the consequences of their actions. For example, if you eat solid food on post-op day 3, you can hurt yourself. Should you eat that? No, you shouldn't. Can you? Of course you can, but you shouldn't. Not being argumentative here, just stating my opinion.

[Andell 53]

It's like an alcoholic---just because he is in the 12 step program doesn't mean he knows it all or can control it.

They go to seek advice and help -so do some here.

No one is perfect and yes they might need justification but maybe that is their coping mechanism that they are working thru. Let's hope they are successful with whatever coping mechanisms work for them (instead of food)

Addicts tend to use self-pity to make excuses for their behavior, to justify it, to rationalize it... So that's why I refuse to give anybody more reasons to play the victim role. They'll use that victim role to justify their actions. Making excuses for them, not calling out their coping mechanisms = being an enabler. They will flourish in self-pity, and we already know self-pity is extremely toxic. I wouldn't add to it. Addicts need straight answers to know the consequences of their actions. For example, if you eat solid food on post-op day 3, you can hurt yourself. Should you eat that? No, you shouldn't. Can you? Of course you can, but you shouldn't. Not being argumentative here, just stating my opinion.

Yep. It's really that simple.

[LipstickLady 25,682]

Ssze1109 that was very well said!!! I am at the airport now coming from California (where I just had surgery) back to my home and someone referred this site and others and the responses to some comments made me feel that perhaps this is not the right spot for me. I am self pay (well my job paid cash) so I don't have as much information as I would like regarding "after surgery" most of my knowledge was researched on everything up to surgery date. All I could think of was how much I wanted it and find my self like the fish who escaped in finding Nemo "now what" so I thought that I would join others to see things to eat that worked well for others. If I was eating right, healthy, proportioned, etc I would not have needed the surgery. I have made it thru the surgery 4days ago) and feel like I'm going to be that one gaining it back when I lose finally lose it from ratings habits I failed to properly correct

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So you had surger, you're at the airport, you joined this site at 10:28, read for eleven minutes and posted the above at 10:39 deciding this place is not for you?

Huh...

[theantichick 2,204]

For anyone who doesn't have good information about post op care and diet from their surgeon, I highly recommend Alex's big book. It's good basic information. Along with some judicious Google research you should be able to make your way through. It's not right that surgeons are apparently not always giving good comprehensive after care instructions, no matter if it's state side or not, insured or self pay. But we as patients have the responsibility for our care. If you didn't get good info from your surgeon and team, go find it. This is not something that you should "wing it" IMHO.

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[suzzzzz 1,005]

For anyone who doesn't have good information about post op care and diet from their surgeon, I highly recommend Alex's big book. It's good basic information. Along with some judicious Google research you should be able to make your way through. It's not right that surgeons are apparently not always giving good comprehensive after care instructions, no matter if it's state side or not, insured or self pay. But we as patients have the responsibility for our care. If you didn't get good info from your surgeon and team, go find it. This is not something that you should "wing it" IMHO.

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Educating ourselves is something anyone CAN and SHOULD do!

[LipstickLady 25,682]

Wow. This is quite sad. While I don't defend people who are asking about funnel cakes etc... I do have a somewhat different perspective.

Not everyone is intelligent or has common sense. Many people (me ) were self pay and had NO pre op classes, no nutritionist, no counseling, no booklet to refer to. My friend on the other hand had all of that plus a huge binder to refer to. Thank God I'm in the medical profession and read what I needed to.

We all got overweight for different reasons. Some lack of education, some emotional trauma, lack of money or resources, hereditary, or any other reason we know nothing about.

The sleeve didn't cure them but then the sleeve didn't cure their mind either.

It's like an alcoholic---just because he is in the 12 step program doesn't mean he knows it all or can control it.

They go to seek advice and help -so do some here.

No one is perfect and yes they might need justification but maybe that is their coping mechanism that they are working thru. Let's hope they are successful with whatever coping mechanisms work for them (instead of food)

Yes , there are trolls and really dumb questions but we are not in their shoes and don't know their intentions or reasons.

I see patients who are on 5 liters of oxygen but still smoke, I had a patients husband tell me he puts 18 sugars in his coffee and gives his diabetic wife juice with no idea it had tons of sugar in it. I have patients that have no idea what a carb or Protein is.

I don't ridicule them or make them feel dumb. I try to educate them.

I think everyone hopes to be a success story and be around to help guide others. But unfortunately the sleeve doesn't do the work and there are so many people that need support whether it's to educate or listen or just let them vent.

Yes we all know it should be common sense not to eat Cookies, cake and candy. But if someone takes the time to ask maybe you will be the ONE voice of reason that helps them on their journey and gets thru to them.

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Performing elective surgery on someone who is too incompetent to educate themselves should be a crime. Surely you don't mean these people were forced into a surgery they weren't able to handle intellectually.

Perhaps another "hoop" to "jump through" for surgical approval is a test on nutrition, food progression stages, pre and post op diet options, etc.

I think that would be fab, personally.

[LittleBill 2,231]

Performing elective surgery on someone who is too incompetent to educate themselves should be a crime. Surely you don't mean these people were forced into a surgery they weren't able to handle intellectually.

Perhaps another "hoop" to "jump through" for surgical approval is a test on nutrition, food progression stages, pre and post op diet options, etc.

I think that would be fab, personally.

My program actually does that, but to say it is perfunctory would be generous. There is big money in making fat people skinny, and as long as that is a motive, there are going to be all sorts of unprepared people put through the process. The surgeons and ancillary staff get paid whether we lose weight or not.

[Hammer_Down 631]

I was self pay in Mexico.

I read on here and dozens of publicly accessible medical journals through NIH, NHS and Health Canada before even making contact with the surgeon in Mexico. I started receiving preop emails around the time I was to begin and have received weekly post op care emails each week since surgery.

I also fortunately had a long history (of success) with low carb and ketogenic diets, and unfortunately also with drug and alcohol addiction and other self destructive behaviours. The latter contributed to my weight gain, and I made a decision to get totally clean and chart a new path for my health and sanity.

Perhaps that's why I don't mind straight advice. I can't get down with Jesus or higher power BS and thus 12 step programs were never on my radar. I indulged myself in information and tried to educate myself as well as possible about any and all possible outcomes.

This has always been my approach, and I totally accept that it's not for everyone. Some people want information presented to them personally on a silver platter and some of us need to be muckrakers and find it ourselves to believe it.

What I can't accept is anti-informational people. People who don't want the truth and are happy subsisting in an echo chamber of what they want to be true instead of what is true. People who want sympathy instead of empathy.

[mille80 62]

@LipsticLady I had a girl in a FB group ask if people had experienced bad breath after surgery. When told that she probably was in ketosis and could try a little bit more carbohydrates, she asked if that was something she could buy in the farmacy... And this is post op... I was floored!

Edited January 8, 2017 by mille80

[_Kate_ 2,224]

I was self pay in the uk and didnt go through all the hoops that others seem to have had to do. I did a lot of research before having the surgery. I thought I was prepared, I am intelligent and have a lot of common sense. My NUT was lovely but I was discuraged when she suggested Pasta at week three so never asked her for help again. I read books, came here and googled the hell out of the world wide web.

I asked what I consider a silly question now but at the time I was flummoxed. I messaged someone who appeared to be really helpful on the boards. Never had an answer back. I am so glad I didnt ask on the forums. We go through a lot of crap pre op, then surgery, then getting through post op. Hormones and moods up and down, head games with hunger and the last thing you want is be spoken to like some child whos done something bad. I remember reading a post from someone whos team told him to eat tuna after a few days so even being here is confusing.

No question is stupid. We need to encourage others to come here and ask anything even if it makes us eye roll. As I have said before, its not whats said its HOW its said.

Just my 2 cents worth.

[mille80 62]

_Kate_ I see I was not clear in my post and your words made me go back an rethink. I was floored by the system that has made it possible for somebody to do something so drastic as WLS without knowledge of the basics of nutrition. I try my best not to be judgemental of individuals - but I do not always succeed. In this case it was the system that through me for a loop.

[anonmom 95]

...snip...So coming here and asking "CAN I?" questions is kind of disingenuous, as all of the answers you get are going to be answering the REAL question, which is "SHOULD I?". Think about that before you get defensive and angry about the answers you get from successful vets who are 2-5+ years out and maintaining successfully.

There is a big difference between asking a basic question when you don't know the answer and when you do. I assume that is why OP suggested not getting 'defensive and angry' when you are given real answers.

I also don't understand how people would have enough money to self-pay, but not enough resources to find information on the internet, at the library, etc.

And I stand by my statement that a surgeon who performs any bariatric surgery without providing basic nutritional information and a detailed diet plan for the first 5 weeks post-op, plus guidelines for healthy eating for life, is acting very unethically and irresponsibly and should be sued for malpractice.

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