Feeling so sad

[vegbeth 79]

Just over a week out from sleeve surgery. Physically everything seems to be going fine but emotionally not so great. Came home from the hospital by cab and no one has visited me since getting home. Not that I can blame them since I only have a couple of friends and only one knows the whole story. I just feel completely alone and sad. I went to my therapist today (who I started seeing during my preop stage) and it was good to talk but it was 50 minutes and now I'm back by myself. I caretake my mom who lives in the downstairs apartment but I don't like her to see how sad I am and worry too much. Anyway just looking for a little pep talk.

[paul12677 167]

Sorry your feeling down but try thinking about how many new opportunities are in the near future.. new hobbies .. new people and friends will come into our lives with the new confidence .. the first few weeks are tough but it certainly gets better! Hang in there

Paul12677

[SharBear617 146]

Good start by posting to vent your feelings. But, you're not truly alone...you have you, your body, your mind, and your spirit, lots of company! Not making light of your feelings of sadness from what sounds like a result of some alienation you're going through, just trying to put a positive spin for you to consider. But it is true; all of those parts of ourselves look out for each other, nurture each other, protect each other, etc. Take some of this time while you're physically healing from your surgery to focus on how you can "feed" each one of those aspects of "self" so that you have energy for when you are feeling better to invest time and effort in to establishing more support systems in your future.

I am wishing you calm, peace and strength to get through this sadness, and come out more whole on the other side. Are there any support group meetings through your surgeon's office you can get to? Many there would understand and identify with what you are dealing with. Also, maybe reach out to your friend that you did tell; some people, even though they care, still need to hear their help is needed and appreciated.

Best of luck, and stay strong and positive.

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[clc9 644]

Between major surgery, thoughts of "what have I done to myself?", and the hormones from the fat you're burning, it's no wonder you feel depressed! Hang in there and search around on here. I was just reading a thread on depression - you're not alone in feeling this way. But the good news is, it's not forever.

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[Djmohr 6,965]

Having this type of surgery can be very emotional. It is perfectly normal to feel a little bit down at this stage.

The important thing is you recognize it. Just know that it will get a little better every day.

Try to take some good long walks, I swear it made me feel human again after my bypass.

Drink lots of Water and try not to let it get to you.

best of luck!

[VooLivre2017 79]

Hi! I' about a week out from surgery and totally relate to the emotional rollercoaster. I distract myself by going for a short walk to get fresh air. Yesterday I basically just paced around outside my apartment building but it felt good to be out.

I also have been on Pinterest, looking at new outfits and swimsuits I would like to buy in 8 months, after I lose most of this weight.

CALL YOUR FRIENDS. Many of mine didn't know either. But, if you just call to say hello, ask them about their own lives and really listen, you feel better just being a listening ear to someone else. I actually told one friend about my surgery and they were surprisingly supportive.

Hope you feel a little better tomorrow. Take it one day at a time.

Oh, one more thing. I see from your ticker that you already lost 80 lbs! Celebrate that miracle! You worked for it. This surgery is definitely not the easy route.

[WLSResources/ClothingExch 3,443]

It's true that many people experience emotional upheaval. Apart from that, you don't say whether you invited the friend who knows to visit. Since you're that close, why not let her know that her company would be particularly valued now? As some of the others have said, you can take steps to expand your social circle once you're more mobile.

[Syaniya 319]

Just over a week out from sleeve surgery. Physically everything seems to be going fine but emotionally not so great. Came home from the hospital by cab and no one has visited me since getting home. Not that I can blame them since I only have a couple of friends and only one knows the whole story. I just feel completely alone and sad. I went to my therapist today (who I started seeing during my preop stage) and it was good to talk but it was 50 minutes and now I'm back by myself. I caretake my mom who lives in the downstairs apartment but I don't like her to see how sad I am and worry too much. Anyway just looking for a little pep talk.

Hey @@vegbeth it's great that you are still seeing the therapist, I am also still meeting with with mine. She was super easy to talk to, so I asked her if I could continue coming at least once a month and she was more than happy to keep me on. This journey definitely helps if you have someone unbiased to speak to.

You have been through lots of changes in these last month's. From moving back here to take care of your mom, then onto taking steps for a healthier you.

Just think once your healed, you'll go skiing again and get to do many of the things you enjoyed doing. Getting out of the house even for a short amount of time will make you feel good. Although with this cold weather, I'm not sure, but you love skiing so you're used to the cold

Have you looked into any of the support groups at the office that meet? Maybe just taking that hour once a week will help as you'll be with people who are going through the same feelings and emotional roller coaster you're on.

So glad your feeling good and haven't had too many of the problems some peole do. You did amazing preop and will continue to do awesome post op. Keep thinking positive thoughts and know that this is as much a mental journey as it is a physical one, but you will overcome.

I did all my testing yesterday at the hospital from 8-12, and everything looked good except a small sliding hiatal hernia the tech said. Hes,sending everything over to doc so will see what he says on Wed at my next appt.

Im here if you ever need to vent/talk. Work until about 6 every day except Sun, but message me and I'll get back soon as I have a second.

Keep up the great progress!!!!!

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[HurricaneU 131]

Focus on your goals. Think of some fun things you would like to accomplish. For instance, I love to travel, soon ill be looking forward to traveling while feeling healthy, instead being tired & drained, and also feeling so conscience about my weight while trying to enjoy my vacation. Im sure you have some fun personal goals or things you are looking forward to, right!

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[vegbeth 79]

I just wanted to thank EVERYONE for their kind and supportive words. @@Suaniya thank you for reaching out so personally and as you mentioned it's been a Lot Of changes over the past few months. I know all of this is temporary so I try to stay focused on the positive.

You all helped me get through a rough night and I'm going to keep coming back and reading all the kind and wonderful comments every time I start feeling down. In fact, I think I will print them out and post them around my house! One of the nice things about living alone, I can do silly things like that.

[Redmaxx 740]

You are still early in the post op journey. Emotions go all over the place. It does get better. This time of year is hard as well. Try to stay positive and continue with your therapist. And just remember, we, your bariatric family are always here to listen and try to help.

[LittleBill 2,231]

Just to add one more little bit of perspective to what everyone else has already written...

Mrs. LittleBill and I were driving along yesterday, and passed a school. It was up in the mountains where I grew up. I said, "There's all the happy kids in school, stuck in there for the long, hard, dreary wait until the next holiday. When I was a kid, we all prayed for snow, which was our only hope for release."

January and February can be tough. The big holiday season is over, it is winter out for many of us, and that means ice, snow, dark and cloudy days, etc. All of this can weigh a person down on top of everything you have to deal with in life and your recent surgery.

If you have some time, perhaps this might be an opportunity to get out and meet some people. Volunteer somewhere, join a club, or just hang out in a coffee shop somewhere from time to time. Now, as your life is changing, you have a great opportunity to shape it in a direction you would like. Good luck with it!

[talkingmountain 83]

VegBeth, it's normal to have sad feelings sometimes. You did all the smart things -- reached out to your therapist, posted here, etc.

If you can walk or do any form of gentle exercise, that can be a huge help.

I hope your beautiful kitty cat gives you some additional comfort as you continue to heal!

[sybilvane7 21]

Hi @@vegbeth, how you are doing? Have the sad feelings gone away? Im 5 days out of my surgery and sometimes feel sad as well, it has worked for me thinking of the clothes i'll be able to wear and activities like running and cycling that my coworkers do all the time and i havent joined because of my obesity. Cant wait

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[vegbeth 79]

@@sybilvane7 at 15 days out today and yes I'm feeling better though the emotions do get to me sometimes. But I got the clearance today to get back to the gym which will help me a lot plus I've expanded my support circle just a bit by finding a nutritional counselor who is going to be working with me around the issues centered around food not just what I need to be eating (like the bariatric nutrionist). I have so much more to work on than the pounds I need to loose. Thank you for your support and hope your recovery is going well.

Edited January 12, 2017 by vegbeth