People and their big mouths

[WLSResources/ClothingExch 3,443]

It upset me... because i was finally getting my confidence and groove back

when your own family members do it... it hurts so much more...

Mind you, this comment came from someone who is morbidly obese themselves,... so if anything they should understand!

Every bozo you've ever encountered who wasn't your family was family to someone. Being family doesn't preclude stupidity, obliviousness, self-loathing and fear. Your relative just happens to have cornered the market on all of them. The comments to you have no bearing on your life, never mind your work and success. Good for you for speaking up. Your confidence and groove are yours. Screw the fools.

[LipstickLady 25,682]

You are far too smart to allow some d-bag steal your joy. You can't help who you are related to, but on the same note, you don't have to entertain the lunacy of f-ck wits, blood or not.

Dust yourself off, girly. Imma' swim over there and beat you myself if you give her one more ounce of your being.

[VeroN86 60]

@@KindaFamiliar

Thanks hun, its easier when i stranger does it... but when your own family members do it... it hurts so much more...

Mind you, this comment came from someone who is morbidly obese themselves,... so if anything they should understand!

When you mentioned that I was thinking jealously

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[Babbs 14,680]

What the ever living f*ck?

Number one, did this person expect you to be skinny in 8 weeks?

And B, this person is an a**hole.

You've done an amazing job, and i'm sure you look fabulous. Don't let that dimwit take that away from you.

[allsmilez 13]

Wow!! Ditto everything everyone else has said. I'm proud of you and I don't even know you. Lol! But seriously, people will always have something to say, especially family! Don't let them steal your joy.

[time for june 195]

People who are jealous of others success and attention will always try to put you down. Just say a pray for those because they are the ones that truly need the help. CONGRATULATIONS on YOU!!! You got this and will be even more amazing then before your weight loss journey!

[Miss Mac 6,261]

Like the others, I am proud of you for not giving away your power.

Friends are expensive and family is messy.

What are they going to say when you lose the next 50 pounds?

[VeroN86 60]

Like the others, I am proud of you for not giving away your power.

Friends are expensive and family is messy.

What are they going to say when you lose the next 50 pounds?

Family is messy. I've had family (my children's family from their fathers side) say that they hope that I stay fat or that I'll just gain all of the weight back after surgery. They can't stand it when I become successful in anything. But they consider me "family" smh.

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[OKCPirate 5,323]

...Perhaps i should have shoved the sunday family roast lamb in their mouth to shut them up! Hahaha

I was thinking the opposite end of the digestive tract would have been more appropriate for the rude people.

I agree, the mouth would be the wrong orifice. Since his brains are in his a** anyway, that is where it should go.

@, thanks for ranting and not killing the bastard. Those stupid comments hurt like hell. We all know they shouldn't, but they do. One of my 10 reasons for getting the surgery was "revenge." There have been people who rejected me because of my weight before surgery. As it turns out that has to be the least satisfying result of the surgery. Haters just don't get it, so you never get satisfaction or vindication by rubbing their noses in it. All you can realistically do, is find your own happiness and awesomeness. Occasionally "the I'll show him" thought can be a motivator, but I find it very hollow. Just continue to be awesome.

[ocgirl15 667]

You know this is jealousy right. And this person is so jealous of you they cannot contain it. They made an idiot of themselves in front of their family and I am sure others in your family let them

Have it!!!! From your stats you started at a relatively low BMI like I did (42 for me) and there is no reason you can't loose most of your excess weight. You will be healthy and look great in no time at all. Getting your health back will be the best revenge!

[Shaunie 123]

@ I'm sure this is something that I will encounter in the future. Unfortunately, it always comes from family when you do get the ignorance :-(

You do you!!!!!!!

I'm in the same boat when it comes to negativity so I have also chose to tell a selective few. Unfortunately some people just don't know how to give credit where credit is do.

Keep up tge good work and shame on them :-)

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[Djmohr 6,965]

@

You are doing fantastic but clearly you already know that. Obese family or friends are usually the ones that seem to be the most jealous a$$holes of all. It is because they are still in a place where they are ok living the way they are.

Many are younger and have yet to have serious comorbitities but don't worry, their time will come.

If I were you, I would use this as motivation to get to a healthy weight and stay there. This would be a good way to stick it right up their you know what.

Do not let them take your power away in the future! They are not worth your time.

Good luck on continuing success!

[CHM 1,009]

From what I've witnessed and experienced, negative reactions tend to come from one of three places:

1. You're looking good, and you're garnering attention. Attention that other people are used to having, and often aren't accustomed to sharing. This tends to make them lash out in an attempt to make you look bad and shift the attention back to them, where they're more comfortable.

2. They're simply uneducated. Their knowledge of WLS is either decades old, produced from their own misconceptions, or the result of only paying attention to negative news stories or the gossip around failed patients (hey, those stories are more 'juicy'). Ironically, these also tend to be the same people who think they know everything, believe everything they read on the interwebz, and won't even entertain the notion that they might be wrong. (Your family member MAY fall into this category, but I suspect its more likely door number 3...)

3. They have their own weight problem, and you're making them feel self-conscious and/or jealous. They were perfectly content living in their own denial (as most of us were at some point, I'm sure), and here you come all sparkly and successful and shining a spot light on the topic of obesity and weight loss. It makes them feel exposed and defensive, and so they attack you and/or the surgery - usually loudly. This is partly to deter others from thinking about or asking when they are going to do something about their own weight, and partly to convince themselves that there's no point in making changes or considering a step that they're not ready for or able to afford anyway.

Painful and frustrating as they can be to deal with, none of these reasons have anything to do with you.

You are awesome, and you are doing a great job.

And you know that...

[Fredbear 397]

If you were hosting the get-together, you should have asked this person to leave. Otherwise, I simply would have left myself, while calling the bastard out.

[Valentina 2,642]

Thanks everyone for your support... that family member is usually a jerk.. so i don't have high expectations from them... but secretly it has actually cut me deep...

But i guess i need to remind myself that its their ignorance that they expect me to go from obese to healthy in a couple of weeks.

What makes me so sensitive to it is that i really did try after i had my band not to regain, and this surgery was a last resort.. so to have someone mock that, hurt that little bit extra... grrrr

Perhaps i should have shoved the sunday family roast lamb in their mouth to shut them up! Hahaha

What? and waste all of that yummy Protein?