Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Gastric Bypass Surgery Ruined My Life



Recommended Posts

This was very disheartening to read. Your message sounds very distressed and your statements are concerning for issues of safety. I urge you to seek professional help. Perhaps on an inpatient basis. I'm not going to tell you "it will get better." Instead I'll tell you a portion of my own RNY story. I had surgery on 01/11/2016. I've suffered the same flank (back) pain for 3 weeks. Constipation has been a problem, I haven't been able to keep food or Water down for the past 1.5 weeks. I've had good days, and not so good days. More good than bad. It was a little rough at first trying to get my body to adjust to the long list of things that it won't tolerate, but I realized going in that this is a decision I made, no one else. This surgery has changed my life and it is teaching me patience. I'm back to work and feeling better. I'm down 40 pounds. Some days I do feel weak and drained, but I realize that could partly be because I sometimes forget to take my Vitamins. Today I'm keeping fluids down and soft foods. I can't eat what everyone else eats and its a little awkward sometimes, but again, I had the surgery to help change my relationship with food, and that's precisely what the surgery has done. I do not know you, nor can I pretend to have a grasp on all the things you are feeling right now, but from what I read, I believe you have experienced a great loss. A loss for which you were unprepared. For example, the loss of the old relationship you had with your fiancée, you two use to eat out a lot together, that was your social circle and something you had in common, now its gone and he has become a caregiver. You're also morning the loss of the comfort food brings, the loss of control you have over your body rejecting food, the discomfort of surgery, mental health issues, etc. I feel for you! This is some serious stuff! Please, please, please reach out to a professional counselor. Know that now is not the time to make a major decision about anything, especially another major surgery. Get things sorted out emotionally ask for help and keep reaching out to people on this forum who have been through this same surgery. Its not all a bed of roses, but the path can lead you to a better life if YOU let it! Prayers and well wishes my RNY buddy! ????

Edited by Klaselayd

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I just read all you have been through and my heart breaks for you since I felt the way you do now. I had a RNY on December 31st 2015. I not only had the RNY but a umbilical hernia where retention stitches were left in. From the minute I woke up the pain was horrible and needless to say it continued up to the 5 week. I cried everyday and wished I never did the surgery and even after the pain passed nothing tasted right I couldn't eat, long story short I had a stricture. I don't want to say what you don't want to hear but it is now March 6th 2016 and I am doing better, food is still a mystery and a challenge but I am learning. You made this choice as I did and we can conquer this and be happy. I still at times regret the surgery but I realize that the weight loss needed happen for me to get back a full life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

First off, check your antidepressents--they obviously aren't working. I speak from experience. Get out of your depression and things will look different.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree with nurse_Lenore. You need to see a Mental Health Professional. Sometimes meds alone don't cut it, or maybe you're on the wrong one for you. Some meds don't work after RNY because they are not able to be absorbed through your stomach anymore. Please seek help before you consider a reversal. At this point, nothing says that will help you either. Talk to your surgeon about the pain and nausea. Join a support group to learn more how to deal with your surgery. I don't know if you believe in prayer, but I will be praying for you.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can't say anything that hasn't already been said. I had my surgery august 2013 I was in surgery 71/2 hrs. I had so much scar tissue, I was in the hospital longer than others I never returned to my bed for 3mths. My sw 321 cw216 my lowest was 211.,I didn't take my preop serious enough. I really should have lost more. But till this day with all my complications I'd do it again to lose what I have. It was worth it. Yes I still go out to eat. Yes I do over eat then throw up due to it. I still have the addiction. But I'm not giving up, there is still a fight in me, sometimes it gets weak, very weak, but I seem to pull it out. I have to do this for me and my family. The Lord is my helper in times of trouble, I call on his name. I'll pray for you.

Jesus I ask right now where this person lay that you touch her mind, body, and spirit. She needs a healing touch some where that only you can do Lord. So I'm asking this in faith believing in Jesus name Amen.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My problems are not exactly the same as yours but you are experiencing some of the remorse I feel. I'm so sorry you're going through this. I just want to send you a ((hug)) through the puter and only hope that with time and treatment there will be some kind of happy medium for you! If not a complete healing of some sort.

I deal with a lot of chronic pain (back pain) and I can understand how it feels so unfair that we go through this and have to deal with so much pain and negative aftermath when we expected the best.

xxoo Jamie

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I just want to thank every one here for there support. As of Thursday evening my story has completely changed. I will post a copy on this topic.

I'm almost afraid to say it, but at the same time I feel like I need to go outside and shout it from the roof tops! I feel amazing! I am an entirely new person. These first two months from surgery have been the most trying time in my entire life. Most days I couldn't get out of bed, and I wanted nothing more than to lay there and die. I struggled for the first month with muscle pain so severe I couldn't move. After that I struggled debilitating nausea. It got so bad that I hadn't eaten in over a month. On the rare occasion I would try the food would come right back up. Early last week it got so bad that I could no longer keep down Water. At this point I had been in the hospital 5 times for dehydration and different tests. I was taking protonix, Zofran, scopolamine Patches, Reglan, and I was wearing sea bands for motion sickness. None of these things could even take the edge off my nausea. My CT and my Upper GI were clear. My surgeons team kept telling me jit was all in my head. I was so severely depressed and felt like I had no where to go. I was beginning my surgeon for an EDG and she was refusing to give me one. After being unable to keep Water down for two days I went back to the ER and finally demanded I get the care I deserved. I was not going to leave there without answers. I was immediately admitted upon arrival where they found that my potassium levels were dangerously low. Lower than they have ever seen. I was given 6 bags of potassium and countless bags of Fluid to clear the dehydration. I also demanded the do the scope. The scope found slight narrowing that was able to be fixed on the spot. I don't know if it's the scope or the fluids, or potassium that cured me, but whatever it was I finally have my life back. I wake up ready to live every single day! I'm taking half the anti depressants I was before. I hated hated hated hated hated hearing people say it gets better. I was so convinced there was no way out for me. I would lay in bed waiting to die. But it got better. It got so much better. I am living breathing proof that it can all change. I encourage anyone struggling the way I did to advocate for themselves, the doctors and surgeons won't do it for you. I still can't say I would do this all over again, currently I am still too traumatized, but I have learned so much from this surgery. I had this surgery for myself and it was like I had forgotten that after surgery. I needed to still be fighting for myself. I know this is long but I just hope my story can help.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It's ruined my life too. The only reason I had RNY was to address pain issues that were blamed on me being overweight. I had a crazy high metabolic rate before surgery and we knew I'd gain back the weight quickly.
I had a stroke during the surgery with permanent damage. So many of the things I was really good at are gone. I have to learn differently now. I can't take anything I think I know for granted.

My pain, after losing 130 pounds, was identified as fibromyalgia, deteriorating joint disease, and critical damage I did to my joints by being so physically active when I was heavy and trying to get healthy (lose weight, my health was perfectly fine otherwise.)

My pouch didn't stretch much. I max out at 1 cup at a time. My malnutrition, anemia, and endocrine issues are a constant threat to my health.

I eat so little, it's embarrassing to eat with other people. They get concerned about how little I eat. Eating in a restaurant is a waste - I have 3 bites of this, 2 of that, and my meal is over. Cooking for myself is miserable. I used to be an excellent cook. Shopping and cooking for maybe 20 cups of food per week without cooking once and eating leftovers for the rest of the week means SO much work and so much money wasted.

I lost my livelihood, my retirement, filed bankruptcy, lost my social contacts because of my cognitive problems caused by the brain injury during surgery.
I can't keep my weight stable. The less I eat, the more weight I gain (same problem as before surgery).
My pain is only just being managed in a way that I'm not dumb and stupid for hours at a time.
Eating is misery.

I met with my therapist today. We talked about food for the first time. She suggested I think about how I want food to be in my life. I decided to come online and see if there was a support group for people who are also having a hard time after RNY.

I feel a little less alone.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm sorry about what happened in surgery also why you're body want let you loose weight. Body feels like it is in starvation mode so it holds onto what ever you feed it. I pray that wt. will come off and you get back to your normal life deserve it. Good Luck!!!


Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Prdgrdma

      So I guess after gastric bypass surgery, I cant eat flock chips because they are fried???  They sell them on here so I thought I could have them. So high in protein and no carbs.  They don't bother me at all.  Help. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        It's possible for a very high fat meal to cause dumping in some (30% or so) gastric bypass patients, although it's more likely to be triggered by high sugar, or by the high fat/high sugar combo (think ice cream, donuts). Dietitians will tell you to never do anything that isn't 100% healthy ever again. Realistically, you should aim for a good balance of protein, carbs, and fat each day. Should you eat fried foods every day? No. Is it possible they will make you sick? Maybe. Is it okay to eat some to see what happens and have them for a treat every now and again? Yes.

    • NovelTee

      I'm not at all hungry on this liquid pre-op diet, but I miss the sensation of chewing. It's been about two weeks––surgery is in two days––and I can't imagine how I'll feel a couple of weeks post-op. Tonight, I randomly stumbled upon a mukbang channel on YouTube, and it was strangely soothing... is it just me, or is this a thing? 
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        I actually watched cooking shows during my pre-op, like Great British Baking Show. It was a little bizarre, but didn't make me hungry. I think it was also soothing in a way.

    • Clueless_girl

      How do you figure out what your ideal weight should be? I've had a figure in my head for years, but after 3 mths of recovery I'm already almost there. So maybe my goal should be lower?
      · 2 replies
      1. NickelChip

        Well, there is actually a formula for "Ideal Body Weight" and you can use a calculator to figure it out for you. This one also does an adjusted weight for a person who starts out overweight or obese. https://www.mdcalc.com/calc/68/ideal-body-weight-adjusted-body-weight

        I would use that as a starting point, and then just see how you feel as you lose. How you look and feel is more important than a number.

      2. Clueless_girl

        I did find different calculators but I couldn't find any that accounted for body frame. But you're right, it is just a number. It was just disheartening to see that although I lost 60% of my excess weight, it's still not in the "normal/healthy" range..

    • Aunty Mamo

      Tomorrow marks two weeks since surgery day and while I'm feeling remarkably well and going about just about every normal activity, I did wind up with a surface abscess on on of my incision sights and was put on an antibiotic that made me so impacted that it took me more than two hours to eliminate yesterday and scared the hell out of me. Now there's Miralax in all my beverages that aren't Smooth Move tea. I cannot experience that again. I shouldn't have to take Ativan to go to the lady's. I really looking forward to my body getting with the program again. 
      I'm in day three of the "puree" stage of eating and despite the strange textures, all of the savory flavors seem decadent. 
      I timed this surgery so that I'd be recovering during my spring break. That was a good plan. Today is a state holiday and the final day of break. I feel really strong to return to school tomorrow. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Now that I'm in maintenance mode, I'm getting a into a routine for my meals. Every day, I start out with 8-16 ounces of water, and then a proffee, which I have come to look forward to even the night before. My proffees are simply a black coffee with a protein powder added. There are three products that I cycle through: Premier Vanilla, Orgain Vanilla, and Dymatize Vanilla.
      For second breakfast on workdays, I will have a low-fat yogurt with two tablespoons of PBFit and two teaspoons of no sugar added dried cherries. I will have ingested 35-45 grams of protein at this point between the two breakfasts, with 250-285 calories, and about 20 carbs.
      For second breakfast on non-workdays, I will prepare two servings of plain, instant oatmeal with a tablespoon of an olive oil-based spread. This means I will have had 34 grams of protein, 365 calories, and 38 carbs. Non-workdays are when I am being very active with training sessions, so I allow myself more carbohydrate fuel.
      Snacks on any day are always mixed nuts, even when I am travelling. I will have 0.2 cups of a blend that I make myself. It consists of dry roasted peanuts, cashews, pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds, pistachios, and Brazil nuts. This is 5 grams of protein, 163 calories, and 7 carbs.
      Breakfast and snacks have been the easiest to nail down. Lunch and dinner have more variables, and I prepare enough for leftovers. I concentrate on protein first, and then add vegetables. Typically tempeh, tofu, or Field Roast products with roasted or sautéed vegetables. Today, I will be eating leftovers from last night. Two ounces of tempeh with four ounces of roasted vegetables that consist of red and yellow sweet peppers, sweet potatoes, small purple potatoes, zucchini, and carrots. I will add a tablespoon of olive oil-based spread, break up 3 walnuts to sprinkle of top, and garnish with two tablespoons of grated Parmesan cheese. This particular meal will be 19 grams of protein, 377 calories, and 28 grams of carbs. Bear in mind that I do eat more carbs when I am not working, and I focus on ingesting healthy carbs instead of breads/crackers/chips/crisps.
      It's a helluva journey and I'm thankful to be on it!
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×