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Hi! So I'm a year out now - how did THAT happen? I'm not done yet, but it's been a pretty wild ride so far. I'm down 105 pounds from my starting weight, 101 from the day of surgery (I lost 4 on the pre-op liquid diet over 2 days, lol), and at LEAST 135 from my highest, which was earlier last year (that scale only hit 330 and I maxed it out).


Along the way, I've discovered a few personal realities - they may not be true for everyone else, but for me they are.


- Some days I look at stuff I've worn before and think, "There's not a chance in hell that's going over my head." Every single time, I'm shocked when it does.


- Lots of people treat me better now that I'm more "normal". But every time I start counting on it, along comes some jerk...and that's okay. I think I need the reminder that it wasn't always about me anyway!


- I need to leave my credit cards at home. Shopping is a lot more fun now.


- It's easy to fall off track with counting Protein, watching calories, and taking Vitamins. It's like I rolled over one day and just felt like a regular person. This is going to actually require diligence and consideration for the rest of my life. I knew that when I signed up for this, and I'm going to do it - I just didn't think when I came out of surgery that there would ever be a moment that it wasn't in the front of my mind.


- I need treats now and then or I won't succeed. The urge to binge and passive-aggressive desire to eat something just because I shouldn't will NEVER, EVER go away - the sleeve keeps the binges from being too bad, and if I build treats into my plan and track them, I'm a lot less likely to go off the rails. (pizza happens, y'all, and for ME that's okay - YMMV. 3/4 of a slice once a month now vs. an entire medium pizza with garlic dipping sauce, ALL the wings, and half a box of cinnamon sticks every Friday before...it's still a win in my book).


- When I'm hungry now, I'm HUNGRY RIGHT NOW! Gotta keep Snacks at hand or I will tank and hit the floor. Either because I've passed out, or because someone is going to check my hanger and KNOCK me out someday, lol. I've been trying to date and think I scared one off when he watched me shovel a salad into my face like a farm animal. He was late, I was hungry.


- Someone can watch you successfully lose weight, and still want to interject their opinion about how you should be doing it. Nod, smile, and go back to what you're doing. My "instructional guru" has gained 30 pounds back in the last couple of months and STILL wants to tell me how to eat. Life is far easier now that I've learned to take that with a sense of humor and not get angry about it.


- If you never liked exercise, you probably still won't. It'll just be easier to do. Then again...you might just find something you like! I'm a total couch potato but always used to fantasize about running for some reason. Finally launched C25K this week, and something tells me I might like it if I can keep my knees from blowing out.


- I need kleenex around ALL. THE. TIME. My nose runs when I'm full, it runs when I'm hungry, it runs when I get hiccups...sometimes I even sneeze when I've taken one bite too many.


- Speaking of sneezes, sometimes when I sneeze I vomit. I don't have to be overly full, I can eat exactly the right portion for my sleeve, but if I sneeze too close to a meal when everything seizes up it just sort of launches everything back out. That was unexpected.


- I've met guys who care that I'm still heavy. Some who think I'm not quite big enough and are afraid I'll lose more weight, some who think I'm too big, some who think I'll get bigger again. The ones who ARE into me the way that I am don't give one iota about my "shrinkles". I haven't met a good mental match, but no one I've had any physical relationship with cares. I was pretty worried about that but it's been a non-issue so far. My need to indulge in the use of "artistic lingerie placement" (ie, I always manage to keep my tummy covered somehow, lol) has never once been challenged.


- I was lucky to have a respectful, attentive PCP, but I've had issues with medical providers before. The smaller I get, the fewer issues I have.


- It should be basic knowledge for doctors, but if you need to go to the ER, watch out. I've been twice since surgery (once for a car accident, and once when my cat scratched my eyeball) and they're quick to dispense the 800mg ibuprofen even with a full medical history and a "no nsaid" note in the chart. With the eye, I took 'em anyway (along with the other, better drugs). I would've let someone hit me in the head with a bat to make that stop hurting! But it does illustrate the need to be aware and always prepared to advocate for yourself.


- It's so nice to have a lap now. I can hold my computer! My critters! My nieces and nephews! It's wonderful.


- How I see myself is not always how others see me. My boss and my friends all look at me and think I should be done now. I look at myself and still see a butterball. The charts say I'm still 55 pounds overweight, but my doctor (who won't give me a goal) says I shouldn't be aiming that low because she's shorter than me and small boned and weighs what the chart says I SHOULD weigh. At first, I wasn't worried about where to try to settle because it seemed so unbelieveable that I would ever get there. Now that I know it's possible, picking an end point is HARD (and harder still when I factor in a bit of dysmorphia, because I'm not sure I'll ever look in the mirror and see someone small enough to go to maintenance).


- Sometimes I discount the journey I've made, or I want to eat something I know will make me sick and have a momentary pang of regret. I don't feel bad about that anymore, I just try to go do something I couldn't do before to remind myself what a great decision this was. Sitting in a bathtub, going to a store and trying on something in the misses department (that actually FITS), running up the stairs (instead of having to practically crawl up them using my hands for balance), going through my closet and bagging up something that's too big, stuff like that.


- I knew that things wouldn't change in my life by magic, and that not all of the stasis I was in was caused by my weight. It's true that the poor physical condition and lack of confidence both contributed in a very big way, but it wasn't all of it. I understood that, and decided to work REALLY HARD on the areas I wanted to change the most. What I wasn't anticipating was that, in some of those areas (like finding a relationship), the work hasn't seemed to pay off either. I took that pretty hard. Ongoing therapy is an absolute must for me. You may not need it, but if you DO, then GET IT. There's no shame in it.


- Once you've been sleeved, you'll always be sleeved. That built-in off switch is ALWAYS going to be there. I've had some stretches where my eating has gotten a little out of control, but the beautiful part of this is that the sleeve keeps me from going too far. I can recover from those mistakes now, too. More Protein, more liquid, and I'm right back on track. That's why I got this - not because I ever had any delusions that I could or would be "perfect" at it, but because I knew I COULDN'T and I needed help or I was going to die. Suicide by donut - it's a morbid joke my siblings and I use about our parents, but I was on my way there too.


- I have to resist the urge to act like a salesperson and let my results speak for me. My sister and my niece both desperately need to do something and have vacillated on surgery for a while now. I never felt good and healthy as an adult and it's such a huge difference - sometimes I want to shake them and scream, "BUT DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH BETTER YOU'RE GOING TO FEEL???!!!???". The reality is, I have to shut up unless I'm asked a question and just live the best life I can as an example, because if someone had harped at me about it a couple of years ago I probably wouldn't be sleeved now. It hurts my heart to see people I love in the state they're in, but everyone has to take their own journey and live their own lives.


- Tiny goals are where it's at for me. I never set a goal more than 9 pounds away - no double digits :). I tried to assign meaning to all my goals, too, though ones I had to split up to stay under 10 pounds are just "split goals". But things like "driver's license weight", 20% EWL, 50 from highest ever, graduation weight, etc. I was blowing through them pretty quickly at first, but now that things have slowed down a lot keeping my goals close together is helping me stay motivated.


I can't wait to see what the next year holds.


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Excellent post! I appreciate your perspective a year out and hope I have the same as I reach that point. I'm only a couple months out but already am starting to experience some of the things you mentioned.

Your comment about the sleeve always being available as a tool is spot on. I had to travel for a 10 day business trip over the last two weeks and in the past that would have resulted in a 4 or 5 pound weight gain. Even though I wasn't able to totally follow my nutrition plan, because of the limitations of the sleeve I was still able to lose two pounds during that trip.

I also agree with your thoughts about setting short term, achieveable goals. I've decided that instead of setting scale goals I use clothing sizes. Setting a target of reducing to the next lower size seems like a reasonable target. I've already been able to hit two of these and am just a week or two away from another.

Keep up the good work!

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Wow, great post and excellent results.

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Thank you so much for your insights and for taking the time for such a thoughtful post. Happy surgiversary!

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I am slightly further out then you, (by a month) and can relate to a lot of what you said & thanks for the reminder about the NSAIDs. I thought about that recently and stressed to my husband if I'm ever in the hospital and can't speak for myself, tell them no NSAIDs.

Congrats to you & hope you eventually find your "match". In the meantime, enjoy dating.....

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Damn! That is one of the BEST one-year surgiversary posts I've ever read.

Thank you for every word. You are doing so great. And I think you're going to be surprised at how you continue to feel better with every additional pound you lose.

I also really appreciated how you're increasingly able to hold your tongue about all kinds of things. Some good words there for me -- thank you.

FYI, I never, ever thought I'd get to the healthy weight I am now. And the biggest surprise was that the last 10 pounds I lost made the biggest difference in how much better my knees feel and how far / fast I can now walk.

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Wow - you look great and your insights are an inspiration! Thank you for sharing ❤️❤️❤️????????

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What a great post, well done on what you have achieved. Yes this post is one of the best I have read too.

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Absolutely one of the best posts for one year I've read! Congratulations on your success. You look wonderful!

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Thanks, everyone! The support from this site and everyone on it has been incredible, and I know I'll be counting on it for years to come :)

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This is a really helpful post. Thank you.

I'm 5 months post op and 5 stone lost. I had problems at the beginning and sometimes now I struggle to eat enough. My surgery was in the UK and we don't get given a programme to follow just advice from the dieticians. I worry that I don't eat enough Protein. My meals are still saucer sized. Don't get me wrong I'm loving my weight loss but I worry that I'm doing something wrong. How do people get the right amount of protein every day. I still can't tolerate bread, Pasta or rice. I went out with friends last night for our Christmas meal. Thankfully I enjoyed the meat and a few sprouts.

I love reading these posts they keep me going. Thank you. ????

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Amazing! Congratulations, you look fantastic. I really enjoyed your post. I can relate to the nose running! I carry tissues round with me all the time :)

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You look awesome! Great job and congrats on your hard work paying off!!! And I hear you on the shopping problem!!!

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    • Prdgrdma

      So I guess after gastric bypass surgery, I cant eat flock chips because they are fried???  They sell them on here so I thought I could have them. So high in protein and no carbs.  They don't bother me at all.  Help. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        It's possible for a very high fat meal to cause dumping in some (30% or so) gastric bypass patients, although it's more likely to be triggered by high sugar, or by the high fat/high sugar combo (think ice cream, donuts). Dietitians will tell you to never do anything that isn't 100% healthy ever again. Realistically, you should aim for a good balance of protein, carbs, and fat each day. Should you eat fried foods every day? No. Is it possible they will make you sick? Maybe. Is it okay to eat some to see what happens and have them for a treat every now and again? Yes.

    • NovelTee

      I'm not at all hungry on this liquid pre-op diet, but I miss the sensation of chewing. It's been about two weeks––surgery is in two days––and I can't imagine how I'll feel a couple of weeks post-op. Tonight, I randomly stumbled upon a mukbang channel on YouTube, and it was strangely soothing... is it just me, or is this a thing? 
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        I actually watched cooking shows during my pre-op, like Great British Baking Show. It was a little bizarre, but didn't make me hungry. I think it was also soothing in a way.

    • Clueless_girl

      How do you figure out what your ideal weight should be? I've had a figure in my head for years, but after 3 mths of recovery I'm already almost there. So maybe my goal should be lower?
      · 3 replies
      1. NickelChip

        Well, there is actually a formula for "Ideal Body Weight" and you can use a calculator to figure it out for you. This one also does an adjusted weight for a person who starts out overweight or obese. https://www.mdcalc.com/calc/68/ideal-body-weight-adjusted-body-weight

        I would use that as a starting point, and then just see how you feel as you lose. How you look and feel is more important than a number.

      2. Clueless_girl

        I did find different calculators but I couldn't find any that accounted for body frame. But you're right, it is just a number. It was just disheartening to see that although I lost 60% of my excess weight, it's still not in the "normal/healthy" range..

      3. NickelChip

        I think it's important to remember that the weight charts and BMI ranges were developed a very long time ago and only intended to be applied to people who have never been overweight or obese. Those numbers aren't for us. When you are larger, especially for a long time, your body develops extra bone to support the weight. Your organs get a little bigger to handle the extra mass. Your entire infrastructure increases so you can support and function with the extra weight. That doesn't all go away just because you burn off the excess fat. If you still had a pair of jeans from your skinniest point in life and then lost weight to get to the exact number on the scale you were when those jeans fit you, chances are they would be a little baggy now because you would actually be thinner than you were, even though the scale and the BMI chart disagree. When in doubt, listen to the jeans, not the scale!

    • Aunty Mamo

      Tomorrow marks two weeks since surgery day and while I'm feeling remarkably well and going about just about every normal activity, I did wind up with a surface abscess on on of my incision sights and was put on an antibiotic that made me so impacted that it took me more than two hours to eliminate yesterday and scared the hell out of me. Now there's Miralax in all my beverages that aren't Smooth Move tea. I cannot experience that again. I shouldn't have to take Ativan to go to the lady's. I really looking forward to my body getting with the program again. 
      I'm in day three of the "puree" stage of eating and despite the strange textures, all of the savory flavors seem decadent. 
      I timed this surgery so that I'd be recovering during my spring break. That was a good plan. Today is a state holiday and the final day of break. I feel really strong to return to school tomorrow. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Now that I'm in maintenance mode, I'm getting a into a routine for my meals. Every day, I start out with 8-16 ounces of water, and then a proffee, which I have come to look forward to even the night before. My proffees are simply a black coffee with a protein powder added. There are three products that I cycle through: Premier Vanilla, Orgain Vanilla, and Dymatize Vanilla.
      For second breakfast on workdays, I will have a low-fat yogurt with two tablespoons of PBFit and two teaspoons of no sugar added dried cherries. I will have ingested 35-45 grams of protein at this point between the two breakfasts, with 250-285 calories, and about 20 carbs.
      For second breakfast on non-workdays, I will prepare two servings of plain, instant oatmeal with a tablespoon of an olive oil-based spread. This means I will have had 34 grams of protein, 365 calories, and 38 carbs. Non-workdays are when I am being very active with training sessions, so I allow myself more carbohydrate fuel.
      Snacks on any day are always mixed nuts, even when I am travelling. I will have 0.2 cups of a blend that I make myself. It consists of dry roasted peanuts, cashews, pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds, pistachios, and Brazil nuts. This is 5 grams of protein, 163 calories, and 7 carbs.
      Breakfast and snacks have been the easiest to nail down. Lunch and dinner have more variables, and I prepare enough for leftovers. I concentrate on protein first, and then add vegetables. Typically tempeh, tofu, or Field Roast products with roasted or sautéed vegetables. Today, I will be eating leftovers from last night. Two ounces of tempeh with four ounces of roasted vegetables that consist of red and yellow sweet peppers, sweet potatoes, small purple potatoes, zucchini, and carrots. I will add a tablespoon of olive oil-based spread, break up 3 walnuts to sprinkle of top, and garnish with two tablespoons of grated Parmesan cheese. This particular meal will be 19 grams of protein, 377 calories, and 28 grams of carbs. Bear in mind that I do eat more carbs when I am not working, and I focus on ingesting healthy carbs instead of breads/crackers/chips/crisps.
      It's a helluva journey and I'm thankful to be on it!
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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