I Just Want To Cry

[LousPeachy 100]

I have stayed on a healthy eating plan and lost over 40 pounds. I felt SO good about everything. Then the stress got to me 3 days ago and everything went the totally downhill from there.

My husband and I got into a few rip roaring arguments. My 2 old dogs with bad tempers kept battling for alpha status and the younger ones kept getting caught in the middle, barking and growling with a few nips here and there. My PCP changed my antidepressent and it costs 10 times more than my old one. She won't switch me back and told me to see a psychologist for other options.

The WLS STILL hasn't reviewed my records from my liver doctor so I will know if I can have surgery despite the fact he has had them since last Friday. I suspect he was never given them by his office staff (call back today between 5-6). Why do I think I STILL won't know anything when I call.

And the worse, stupidity reigned just a bit ago and I ate a big hamburger with cheese PLUS I have been grazing on a huge bowl of popcorn all day. I am totally disgusted with myself. AND, to top it off, I didn't even enjoy the burger or the popcorn. I actually ENJOY the healthy foods I have been eating. What I pigged out one today tasted horrible to me. I would have enjoyed a Protein Shake more!

Thanks for letting me vent. Nobody can work all this out but me, myself and I. But thanks for listening.

[borg/assimilated 576]

Sounds like a few bad days. Time to move on, you've done well and will again.

[jeanniereenie 177]

you will find your way to deal with the stress, after surgery it has become a whole lot more mental to me...remember this is for YOU

if you need a buddy friend me , i am in Texas too

[ShrinkingPeach 1,291]

Forgive yourself and get back on the horse. You have had more than your share of stress the last few days. You are still human and we make mistakes. You have done so well and you know you can do this! Good luck and it will all work out.

[Babbs 14,680]

Awww vent away! We all understand!

Sounds like you got a lot going on. I do too right now. I have been FIGHTING so hard this week the urge to just EAT out of sheer stress. I can honestly say it's the first time it's been this bad since surgery.

Don't beat yourself up. I used to have a Weight Watchers coach thay used to say "If you're unloading the dishwasher, and you break a dish, you don't break the rest of them, do you? No, you just pick up the broken dish and move on"

Acknowledge your little slip, and move on. Just continue your otherwise healthy habits. Try to find another way to manage your stress...take those naughty dogs for a nice long walk so they are too tired to fight! Read, listen to music, sit in the sun...find something that will recharge you.

The most important thing to remember? This too, shall pass.

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

Vent away...then back on track....that's what I do even post op...

[Miss Mac 6,261]

Oh, no! Sorry to hear that you are being bombarded with stress. If stress burned calories, we all would have been supermodels a long time ago. I hope that your environment calms down so that you can have some refreshing peace of mind. Hugs from Miss Mac in Chicago.

[AvaFern 3,516]

It's ok to have a bad day and fall off the wagon- most of us do. Those who are successful are those who get back on the wagon the next day.

As for your PCP, tell her that she can either switch you back to your old antidepressant or help you find a mutually acceptable cost efficient version of the drug you need, or you will move to a new doctor. Doctors like to be bullies...be the bigger bully and you generally get what you want. I worked in healthcare for quite a while...the patients that refuse to be pushed around are generally the patients that get what they want when their medical requests are valid, reasonable, and ultimately promote their health. If there is no medically valid reason to switch you to a new drug, put your foot down, or get a new doctor who understand that money doesn't grow on trees.

[Bandora 136]

Always remember ...tomorrow is another day! We all slip and feel frustration. Take it one day at time and always remind yourself of the 40lbs you have lost. Good luck !

[LousPeachy 100]

Thanks for the encouragement everyone. As I suspected, when I called the surgeons office back "between 5-6", they were already gone for the day. But first thing tomorrow I will be back on the phone. If this doctor wasn't so highly rated, I would find someone else. I am NOT going to the office since it is in a huge hospital and I am exhausted by the time I finally get there. Plus the temps are already hot and humid here in Houston, in the mid 90's some days. This is OUR "winter".

Thanks again everyone.

[AussieSam 234]

I know this might sound crazy but a friend once told me if you in that emotional eating mode and can't find a way to stop eat something you don't like and that might stop you from over eating.

[TXBrittBritt 48]

"Stress" is a dirty word to us emotional eaters! But I think you are doing just fine.... Just the fact the you can acknowledge that stress triggered you to divert from your healthy eating is saying something. Love yourself and give yourself some credit! The past is history.... Tomorrow is a mystery.... But today is a gift.... That's why they call it the present! Take it day by day and don't give up!

[NikkiDoc 312]

I really get the whole dog thing. I have 3 dogs. The two males, both fixed, have not been in the same room at the same time for 4 years. The Eskimo Spitz pick fights with the lab. The lab has almost killed him twice. It is a pain in the butt because all 3 dogs want to be with people. The female foxhound is fine with either dog so near people at all times. That is a good thing since she will bay if she isn't near me or my husband. You would think living in a kennel with dogs for 11.5 years she would be fine without humans for more than 2 minutes at a time. Nope.

I am convinced my surgeon's staff was losing paperwork. It amazes me but 4 separate providers in 4 separate health systems told me they send the results to the surgeon's office. The staff claims they never received any of it. I also know that the psych eval was received by their financial department yet the surgeon's staff kept claiming they didn't have it. I had to insist they get it from their own finance department. Of course, the finance department hadn't gotten the mailed copy I had to have the psych doc fax it to her. It is so frustrating when the doctor or surgeon is great but his staff sucks. I dumped an orthopaedic doctor over the office staff and refused to let my husband use that doc when his PCP recommended him.

Look on the website for your new antidepressant. The manufacturer sometimes have programs to help with the cost. That can buy you time until you can see a psycologist. I personally think for long term issues in the mental health area you do best to see somebody that specializes in mental health. I think they have a better education regarding which drugs are available. I also think that they are better able to provide the therapy and additonal coping skills that a PCP cannot. I feel the same about diabetes being managed by a PCP, I think a endocrinologist is far better equipped.

I hope your stress levels come down soon. Go ahead and keep following up with the office staff. I was calling mine daily for 2 weeks. I am sure they cringed when they heard my voice. Tough titties. This is my health.

[Stevehud 1,790]

say whats on your mind and heart. There is no one here who is perfect. Especially me. We are here nd we understand. Trust me, we do.

[LousPeachy 100]

I am back ON the wagon today instead of under it. I called the surgeon again today and told them all our other plans are on hold till we find out about surgery. I spoke to the same girl as yesterday and she said she told me to call between 4-5, NOT 5-6 like I know she said. But yesterday she specifically told me that time because because, her own words, the doctor was in clinic til 5.

One thing, she DID talk to the doctor briefly today when I was on the phone so he IS aware I am waiting for his decision whether or not to do the surgery. She said I should know something early next week (where have I heard this before). I told HER i would be bugging her Wednesday if she didn't get back to me by then. And I will bug her until I know.

Thanks again everyone.