Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Has anyone become single as a result of their weight loss surgery?



Recommended Posts

My daughter is 8 she knows and has seen me change so far. She comments mom you look skinny. Lol but she doesn't care either way it seems lol my son will be 4 next month he's oblivious as some men are lol

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My daughter is 8 she knows and has seen me change so far. She comments mom you look skinny. Lol but she doesn't care either way it seems lol my son will be 4 next month he's oblivious as some men are lol

My daughter tends to over analyze things to the extreme and I don't want to cause her any additional anxiety, which is why I haven't told her.

My son just turned three, so he has no clue and probably never will. LOL!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you for sharing this page. It's interesting to read the impact on kids piece. I have less than 48 hours until surgery and I haven't said a word about it to my 7.5 yr old daughter.

my 10 year old doesn't know either my ten daughter found out when she saw a you tube video on my phone. .she seems fine but she doesn't know risks. .we haven't discussed anything in detail

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My children 11 boy and 14 girl knew during the period I was considering. My mother died at 66 while we were visiting. They are old enough to remember her and get that my choice is to be healthier. When considering, I was terrified I would have to give up coffee. My daughter took my hand and did Mom, lets look it up. She sat with me as I researched that and the surgeon.

My husband and I have discussed this thread. He said if I leave him for somebody else that is fine as long as I am happy. He then added that my new man would have to accept him camping in our backyard because he will never leave me.

My dad paid for the non-insurance part. This was really his idea. He wants me to live longer.

So I email him my summaries for lose it. I announce to the kids and hubby each milestone. Everyone cheers me along.

Friday, I sat with my ex when he was picking up the kids. I had told them not to tell him except I had surgery. 1 week post op and down 21 at the time, I shared the truth, and told him how much the kids are probably worried about his health. I planted the seed of what recovery and financing looks like. He likely weighs close to 400. I hope he makes a decision that will bring him to health so he can live for his kids. I also hope he finds a partner someday. The kids worry about that too.

The kids are paying more attention to their health, and today I am down 24. I made the right decision for me and my loved ones. Now it is up to me to work with my band and have success with this second chance at life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My kids are older... both boys were late teens and early 20s at the time of my surgery 3 years ago. I told them about it, but made it no big deal. I know they were worried sick, but they were old enough to see I was becoming crippled by my weight. They were not openly supportive but I think that was more that they didn't know what to say.

The youngest has really changed his eating habits as he is prone to chunkiness. He eats very healthy now - clearly I was part of the problem before bringing junky food into the house.

I showed my boys a before picture recently and they didn't recognize me. They have now basically forgotten how obese, how sick I really was. They both tell me I am very "young" - looking and attitude.

My oldest is great because he caught me seriously stress eating last week. He wasn't judging, but he just said "mom, you are stress eating" and then went on to tell me what my behavior looked like compared to my "new normal".

Anyway, when momma changes it does impact the whole family. It might be a wild ride, might be a calm one, but things WILL change.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hubby's can be jerks. I personally think Jealousy is a turn on lol. I love it because it means they care.

...well, they care, but it's more about themselves and their perceptions than reality. Jealousy is a distortion of the truth.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well it happend to me this week my boyfriend of a year and a half broke up and its only been 4 weeks since my surgery. Bascially he said I was going to get skinny and leave him so he decided to do it now and not later. I was so mad since he was my supporter in all this. Now Its back to online dating I guess ugh so frustrating. But at least now I can start all over with someone new

Why not take the time for you? Jumping right back into dating life is so stressful. I couldn't do it. I mean I'm not saying I would stay at home and become an old maid but id give myself some time. JMO

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know this is a zombie thread, revised from the dead, but I love your husband!!! Sounds like a keeper to me!

My children 11 boy and 14 girl knew during the period I was considering. My mother died at 66 while we were visiting. They are old enough to remember her and get that my choice is to be healthier. When considering, I was terrified I would have to give up coffee. My daughter took my hand and did Mom, lets look it up. She sat with me as I researched that and the surgeon.

My husband and I have discussed this thread. He said if I leave him for somebody else that is fine as long as I am happy. He then added that my new man would have to accept him camping in our backyard because he will never leave me.

My dad paid for the non-insurance part. This was really his idea. He wants me to live longer.

So I email him my summaries for lose it. I announce to the kids and hubby each milestone. Everyone cheers me along.

Friday, I sat with my ex when he was picking up the kids. I had told them not to tell him except I had surgery. 1 week post op and down 21 at the time, I shared the truth, and told him how much the kids are probably worried about his health. I planted the seed of what recovery and financing looks like. He likely weighs close to 400. I hope he makes a decision that will bring him to health so he can live for his kids. I also hope he finds a partner someday. The kids worry about that too.

The kids are paying more attention to their health, and today I am down 24. I made the right decision for me and my loved ones. Now it is up to me to work with my band and have success with this second chance at life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That is just horrible!!! Actually I hope that losing weight will help me find someone cuz no likes the cute fat boys!!

I dont discriminate!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@pinkbunies. For me jealousy is not a turn on. That person has a problem with himself/ herself and projects on the other person. My X husband was irrationally jealous and we are now divorced. He made my life miserable by accusing me of being involved with everyone; the attendant at the laundromat, the person remodeling the kitchen, the person looking into our car from their car. It's not caring, it's control and insecurity. I would find myself in the middle of a huge argument defending myself about not being involved with these strangers. Crazy! And no, this man never had any reason to believe I was ever, in anyway, unfaithful in our marriage. There was a 12 year age difference and I believe that may of been the basis for a lot of his issues. That and he was cheated on in the previous relationship. Either way it was his issues. I was not flattered in any way. I was sad and angry. Just my two cents.

My ex huaband ( married noc. 3, 2013 divorces sept. 17, 2014) used to do the same! Used to even accuse me of messing with my baby brother! It was so stresseful i used to think to myself "man! He cannot possibly think i am so hot i would have EVERY guy he knows interested in me!!!"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

If anything, losing weight has made my marriage better. But then, neither of us were extremely nutty or obsessively insecure to start.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Mine has been so insecure and jealous, he's accused me of having sex with girlfriends (I'm female & strictly heterosexual) and even my dogs. And this was before I even had surgery. He's got a sick mind. This relationship has had big problems forever but financial hardships have not allowed me to move out. Now that I got through this surgery, it is my goal to become financially secure enough to get out and on with my life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Mine has been so insecure and jealous, he's accused me of having sex with girlfriends (I'm female & strictly heterosexual) and even my dogs. And this was before I even had surgery. He's got a sick mind. This relationship has had big problems forever but financial hardships have not allowed me to move out. Now that I got through this surgery, it is my goal to become financially secure enough to get out and on with my life.

????crack, cocaine usage? Sounds like straight out paranoia....that was my ex's problem...really sick mind but it was drug induced

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Take the trash to the curb and bring sexy back and send him on his way. If you want to make him jealous, tell your getting it on with girls and then tell him he made you lesbian... oh don't do that, I'm just a spiteful person.

I strongly urge you to see a counselor. It has helped us sooooooooooooo much. It is expensive but I just said I'm going to work more.

Mine has been so insecure and jealous, he's accused me of having sex with girlfriends (I'm female & strictly heterosexual) and even my dogs. And this was before I even had surgery. He's got a sick mind. This relationship has had big problems forever but financial hardships have not allowed me to move out. Now that I got through this surgery, it is my goal to become financially secure enough to get out and on with my life.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • jparadigm

      Happy Wednesday!
       
      I hope everyone is having a lovely week so far! 
      It's been a bit of a struggle this last week...I'm hungry ALL the time.
      · 1 reply
      1. BlondePatriotInCDA

        Have a great Wednesday too! Sorry you're hungry all the time, I'm pretty much the same..and I'm sick of eating the same food all the time.

    • ChunkCat

      Well, tomorrow I go in for an impromptu hiatal hernia repair after ending up in the ER over the weekend because I couldn't get food down and water was moving at a trickle... I've been having these symptoms on and off for a few weeks but Sunday was the worst by far and came with chest pain and trouble breathing. The ER PA thinks it is just esophagitis and that the surgeon and radiologist are wrong. But the bariatric surgeon swears it is a hernia, possibly a sliding one based on my symptoms. So he fit me into his schedule this week to repair it! I hope he's right and this sorts it out. He's going to do a scope afterwards to be sure there is nothing wrong with the esophagus. Here's hoping it all goes well!!
      · 2 replies
      1. AmberFL

        omgsh!! Hope all goes well!! Keeping you in my thoughts!

      2. gracesmommy2

        Hope you’re doing well!

    • jparadigm

      Hello lovlies!
      Today is a beautiful day in west Michigan! I hope you all have a beautiful Tuesday and rest of your week!! 🤗
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Clueless_girl

      Having gall bladder surgery in a few days and I so hope the recovery is easier than the one from the modified DS! I could use a bit of luck/pep talk for a change. I'm starting to be able to walk around without experiencing dizziness, but it would be great if the random pain in my chest and abdomen would go away!!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Dawn 1974

      4/4/2024 - new patient orientation. Wt 313
      4/5/2024 - got all my lab work done.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×