Let the Joyous news be spread: New Jersey votes yes on Gay civil union!

carol134 · October 30, 2006

Thank you so much for that it was very heartfelt to hear that. I really needed to hear that though because if you thought that how many others did? So it's gone, I don't need to be doing things that seem to ostentatious. I thank you for telling me that......

If that was not your boss you or someone might tell her that a foul mouth is really not appropiate if she claims to be a servant of God. That is a hugh struggle for me sometimes as well. (cursing)

Tired_Old_Man · October 30, 2006

I would never condemn any Holy Book; The Old Testament, The Dead Sea Scrolls, The Torah, The New Testament, nor the Qur'an or Koran.

But people use verses out of these books for terrible things.

I was watching a documentary on hate recently:

21st century Neo-Nazis in the USA, UK and Germany

21st century Skin Heads in the USA

20th Century KKK leaders

Hitler

were all shown quoting the Bible to validate their messages and actions of hate.

Jefferson Davis, President of the US Confederacy during the civil war

was quoted (with the use of an actor) using passages from the Bible to validate the Confederacy's message and actions of hate as far as justifying slavery and their treatment.

And we all know how religious extremists have used their holy books to justify 911, the Spanish Inquisition and the Salem Witch Hunt, and many more.

If we allow it, Gays will be persecuted in the USA just as they were in Nazi Germany and as the Neo-Nazis of today do, and it will all be based on the Bible for justification.

Sunta · October 30, 2006

Just wanted to mention that my bosses at work are a lesbian couple who have been together for 14 years. They now have an adorable baby daughter and are a very loving family. Just the thought that someone would say that they "threaten the institution of marriage" makes me so angry. It literally just makes me cry that they are not allowed to get married, and I bet that anyone who knew them would feel the exact same way, Christian or not. They are really lovely people. I wonder sometimes if maybe people who are against Gay marriage because of the bible, if they are really close to anyone who is Gay. I don't mean having a casual aquaintance, but really being super close to someone that's Gay. Because I just can't imagine looking at close friends or family members who you love, and seeing the beautiful love they have for their partner and child, and saying "you should not be allowed to get married and being Gay is wrong". I just can't imagine that at all. When I look at my bosses, who I have known for many years (I'm friends with them too) and I see their lovely family, just the thought that they are not allowed to marry, it kills me. It's just so unfair. I wish that everyone who is against Gay marriage could get to know people like them.

HunnyBun · October 30, 2006

I have not read all the posts so I may be repeating something someone else wrote. I'm not arguing anyone as again, I don't know what was written, but I would like to share my view.

I am emotionally and physically drawn to men and women. I feel a 'need' and 'desire' to be with a woman as much as a man. I have been with women before and the experience gave me fulfillment bigger than I thought I could imagine.

When I am with a man, I often feel unhappy of having to pleasure him because it seems unappealing, while when I am with a woman, I absolutely enjoy every moment and it gives me an emotional high. Touching, kissing, feeling another women is simply incredible and without it I could not feel completely happy. But once in a while I meet a man who I ache to be with and feel very unhappy when I can't. It's just as strong physically as it is emotionally, and I know that I CAN NOT control those feelings/urges. I CAN control what I do, and sometimes I choose not to act on those urges.

When someone tells me that being gay is a choice, I say it's true. I can choose not to be with a woman, but noone can ever tell me that feeling gay is a choice, because that is simply NOT TRUE. I can not help feeling bi-sexual.

For me personally, it comes down to the person. Sometimes I feel attracted to a man, sometimes to a woman, but in the end I am with the one who makes me happy.

Am I a sinner? I wonder...

Dianechef · October 30, 2006

I'm not going to quote the bible or bash anyones beliefs on this. I am only stating a fact.

Two women cannot physically make a child together. Our creator made our bodies in a way that you needed one man AND one woman to create a child. In that respect, we call this union a marriage.

If two women want to be together, that is their choice. However, they need a sperm from a man to create a child. Be together, but do not call it a marriage.

As much as I like my gay friends, I am concerned for their children. What do they say to their children about how babies are made? How do they explain that a man was needed to for them to be born?

lisah25 · October 30, 2006

When someone tells me that being gay is a choice, I say it's true. I can choose not to be with a woman, but noone can ever tell me that feeling gay is a choice, because that is simply NOT TRUE. I can not help feeling bi-sexual.

I agree. I love the women in my life, I couldn't get by without them, but I have no sexual draw to them at all. I didn't chose to be attracted to men, so how can I say that anyone else choose which gender(s) they are sexually attracted to?

lisah25 · October 30, 2006

Two women cannot physically make a child together. Our creator made our bodies in a way that you needed one man AND one woman to create a child. In that respect, we call this union a marriage.

Well, actually, the creation of a child is due to sex, not marriage. And of course there are lots of straight people who are infertile, but still can marry legally.

If two women want to be together, that is their choice. However, they need a sperm from a man to create a child. Be together, but do not call it a marriage.

Personally, I'd be fine with that. As long as the legal protections/benefits us straights get with that marriage license. I actually think the civil unions, that address legal issues, for everyone would be fine. Then a religious ceremony for anyone who wanted one.

As much as I like my gay friends, I am concerned for their children. What do they say to their children about how babies are made? How do they explain that a man was needed to for them to be born?

I'm adopted. I grew up knowing that my mommy didn't carry me in her body, that another woman did. I guess I just don't see the problem here. Not all kids are living with straight parents who are biologically related.

anonemouse · October 30, 2006

As much as I like my gay friends, I am concerned for their children. What do they say to their children about how babies are made? How do they explain that a man was needed to for them to be born?

I don't even know what to say to this. To me, it is along the lines of being concerned for the children of a straight couple who had to go to a sperm bank or adopt. Yes, a man is needed to contribute sperm for a woman to get pregnant. That's a fact of life. But he isn't needed to complete a family. Neither is a woman. A family is a unit of people that share love and responsibility. Having a man (or a woman) around doesn't make one group of people more of a family than another.

To put it simply, they explain that there was a wonderful man out there that knew people like Mom and Mommy wanted a child and decided to donate sperm so that they could be a family.

belle75067 · October 30, 2006

Me and my husband go back and forth on this issue. What I am about to say will probably get a lot of people mad, but here is my opinion. I don't believe in gay marriage. And here is the reason, when me and my husband were just living together he wasn't on my insurance from work. He wasn't allowed to use my insurance but one day I was on the doctors office and there was a man in front of me in line. He was asked for his insurance and he plainly said "I am on my partners" insurance and gave a mans name. Why can't my "partner" use my insurance card when he could use his "partner's" insurance card? I know that some people's bread is buttered on the other side and I have no opposition to that. You can love who you want to love but why make a fuss over wanting to get married to that person? If you truly love someone and you and the other person believe in your love why must you pronounce it to the world? I lived with my husband 3 years before we were married and let me tell you we do nothing different than we used to do as boyfriend and girlfriend. At least people who are gay have rights and they are not being discriminated against as much these days. Once again, I know this post will make some people very angry and I apologize ahead of time, but this is my opinion.

lisah25 · October 30, 2006

Me and my husband go back and forth on this issue. What I am about to say will probably get a lot of people mad, but here is my opinion. I don't believe in gay marriage. And here is the reason, when me and my husband were just living together he wasn't on my insurance from work. He wasn't allowed to use my insurance but one day I was on the doctors office and there was a man in front of me in line. He was asked for his insurance and he plainly said "I am on my partners" insurance and gave a mans name. Why can't my "partner" use my insurance card when he could use his "partner's" insurance card? I know that some people's bread is buttered on the other side and I have no opposition to that. You can love who you want to love but why make a fuss over wanting to get married to that person? If you truly love someone and you and the other person believe in your love why must you pronounce it to the world? I lived with my husband 3 years before we were married and let me tell you we do nothing different than we used to do as boyfriend and girlfriend. At least people who are gay have rights and they are not being discriminated against as much these days. Once again, I know this post will make some people very angry and I apologize ahead of time, but this is my opinion.

And you are totally entitled to your opinion, it's one of the cool things about freedom!

The difference is you had the legal right to marry your partner. A gay couple doesn't.

You might be surprised at the legal rights you got when you signed your marriage license. Like the right to be involved in his health care decisions when he can't make them. To visit him in the hospital. To collect on his SS(In fact, my mom was entilted to some of my dad's even though they had divorced). Joint insurance policies.

I've seen lists of the benefits, I'll have to see if I can find one.

pima30 · October 30, 2006

Just wanted to say thanks to Sunta. I'm just so tired of the ignorance that people have. Why would people choose to be gay? Just ask yourself that. It's not because we enjoy the critism that we get on a regular.

vinesqueen · October 30, 2006

I've never been able to figure out how anyone else's relationships had any impact on my relationship with my husband.

Marriage isn't just for making babies. I'm never going to have babies with my husband. Ever. But I want to keep my husband.

Dianechef · October 30, 2006

Hi Vinesqueen, I completely understand that marriage isn't just for making babies.

My point was that one of the many purposes of marriage was to have children. Whether we choose to or not is our choice. However, when you are married to a person of the same sex, making a child is virtually impossible.

There is a reason that it takes one man & one woman to make a child. I don't care what's written in the bible. We all know this is fact.

BJean · October 30, 2006

I had a spirited debate with my nephew about homosexual marriages. He believes like many of you that homosexuals cannot be "married" because the word itself is known to represent two people of the opposite sex entering into a civil (and possibly a religious) union.

I say that the literal meaning of words changes from generation to generation. If you pick up a dictonary from 1900, I'll bet you won't find a lot of the definitions that are word-for-word the same as in a dictonary printed today. It all varies due to accepted usage. Usage changes.

When I was young, my English teachers hated the word "ain't". Teachers enjoyed telling us that "ain't" isn't a word and that we won't find it in the dictonary. Today it is in the dictonary. So that argument against the use of the word "ain't" has become obsolete.

If we want "marriage" to mean the union of two people, no matter which sex, why not embrace the usage of the word "marriage" as needed in today's society? Discrimination is an ugly thing; bias and bigotry are too. Using religion and the Bible to legally exclude certain people in our society is deplorable.

HunnyBun · October 30, 2006

A while ago I was at a birthday party for my nephew and some of my brother's friends were there. I got into a small debate with one of his male friends over gay parents/gay adoption. I thought I was going to rip his hair out, this person was so hurtful it made me literally shut myself in the bathroom and cry.

He told me, straight to my face, that he believes that a child is better off without parents than gay ones. He believes that a homeless child in africa is better off there, than here in the loving arms of two men or women.

How pathetic, scary, and ridiculus is that?