Thread Killers

[Carlene 12]

Carlene.....I can find humour in just about anything!

Carol

And you will have far fewer ulcers and way more friends because you do!

[l.a.susan 0]

i read alot of judgements in this thread and my writing this is also making a judgement on judgmental people . i suppose the answer would be not to opine at all. but, i will say this.

any of you who have read my stuff know that i have not lost weight after over 2yrs. i have some circumstances that are part of the cause but my main complaint was that the band did not do for me what i felt it promised.

i think that regardless of the reasons for for these results for me is a. whether its from reading too

many of the studies and the promises from the company b. its from my own bodies betrayal and /or c. my expectations............ i dont want to be judged.

as mainly women here and most of us fat ,we know what being judged and blamed

and basically called dumb feels like. i dont really think anyone here or any other forums are qualified to give physical or mental advice or opinions about any body else. we cant really believe we can take one post of even a dozen and decide if someone is "eating incorrectly" (my favorite)

or it is "head hunger" (as a psychologist i love that too). the only person we can really make those judgements about are ourselves.

an ethical medical or psychological professional would never analyze someone by what they write on a message board.

these boards responses can be very demeaning and worse hurtful. and i will repeat

being mainly women here and fat we know what hurt is. is that what losing weight from whatever method does to people? does it make us experts on others lives? does it just plain make us forget where we came from (and i believe if i lose weight by what i regard as dieting and denying myself. i will find myself right back there again. i always failed sooner or later using those methods before if the "tool" is doing nothing for me yatatayatata .)? does it make us impatient, intolerant of people who havnt found "it" (sarcasm)yet.? i'm not sure what is going on here.

all i know is that i go to forums (pain, medications, health, lapband etc)

for peer support. it means that i want to find people who will truly empathise with me and share their own experiences but above all treat me with respect for my uniqueness. if i want to be judged and criticized i'll go to a singles bar (at 60, out of shape and broken) not to what is supposed to be a safe peer forum.

as i said this letter in itself is very judgemental so i'll apologise upfront for

insulting anyone and certainly for hurting anyones feelings. all i know is that i am hard enough on myself. (its one of the main reasons i believe i got so fat)

my friends love and respect me and

believe in my good intentions even when i question them myself.

please dont make me just go to qvc or hsn where they truly unconditionally love me.

love and respect , susan

[Morsaille 4]

So glad I stopped back in! Those comics are adorably irreverant!

I didn't want to ignore you, l.a. susan, since there was much thought put into your post. I am going to edit for brevity, K?

i read alot of judgements in this thread and my writing this is also making a judgement on judgmental people.

the only person we can really make those judgements about are ourselves.

an ethical medical or psychological professional would never analyze someone by what they write on a message board.

all i know is that i go to forums (pain, medications, health, lapband etc)

for peer support. it means that i want to find people who will truly empathise with me and share their own experiences but above all treat me with respect for my uniqueness.

if i want to be judged and criticized i'll go to a singles bar (at 60, out of shape and broken) not to what is supposed to be a safe peer forum.

i am hard enough on myself. (its one of the main reasons i believe i got so fat)

You are right when you say that this thread is lacking support, ESPECIALLY for the newly banded. This is the LBT Rants and Raves Forum Gripe, complain, moan, fight, rant and rave. Enter at your own risk.

This means that your post was in the right section, too.

I started this train wreck as a simple question because I noticed that I was "Killing" my fair share of threads.

I thought that it had potential to offend some, so I put it here.

It evolved into 30+ pages of jokes about the process, jokes about each other, but mostly jokes about ourselves.

It is OK if you aren't there yet.

Did you get a chance to read the whole thing? I appreciate that you are refraining from assessing our collective personality by what you have found in this forum. The hard core support is in the Introductions, Complications, Exercise, and General forums. This one is where we go to let our minds roll in the gutter, discuss politics, and heaven forbid, religion.

WELCOME!! You are always welcome here, but if it gets too hairy for you, you might want to rethink Rants and Raves. I am more than willing to support the heck out of you (((l.a. susan))) <- those are hugs. Please don't let anything we type to amuse ourselves, hurt you!

Out of respect for the uniqueness of the weirdos I am lucky to call bandster buddies, I have to stand by this thread. I had a lot of fun with it. I am sorry you found it hurtful.

Brenda

[*susan* 1,709]

Susan, by responding here, I am not ignoring your post or discounting your feelings. I just believe that Morsaille did a wonderful job of addressing your concerns and I could not have possibly addressed it any better than she did.

Now, at the risk of sounding like a complete idiot, will someone please explain the Sharon Stone, Demi Moore cartoon to me. I have looked at it numerous times since yesterday and I still don't get it! :puke:

[Carlene 12]

Okay, here goes....just shoot me if I screw this up.

The docs are OB/GYN guys (see the sign?). One has Sharon Stone's "essence" on his fingers (one presumes from an OB exam), and the other has Demi Moore's. Does this help?

[plumptuous 0]

Oh goodie (jumping in, here...) This is a rant 'thread', so here goes nuthun...

Brenda....

Ah to be young and arrogant... how lovely...

I'm, like, Oh My Gawwwd! :omg: I wish I were - like - you! :bored

My Rant & Welcome To It:

I didn't realize it was improper etiquette to 'jump into' a conversation... I guess I was supposed to await a proper invite? OK, now I know.

(This goes a long way to explain lurking, btw. An idiot 'newbie' like myself sits and reads to learn and get the feel for the forums, then when one does get up the nerve to join in, we're rewarded with smack-downs from someone who has been here since -like, OMG! - like - January!!)

I fail to see how asking -in a polite manner- the meaning of some initials - cryptic to me, and I'm sure many others, following the same discussion (excuse me, thread...) can be a thread killer, but then I am old and therefore not 'with-it'.

Brenda (Morsaille), you remind me of the little pinkies-up type of snots in junior high, that myself and several others avoided like the plague.

One neat thing about being older and wiser... I'm driving the caddy - you're in the VW... figuratively speaking, of course. :heh:

(Kathy Baker's character in Fried Green Tomatoes - in the Piggy Wiggly parking lot scene.)

Back to lurkdom. - Or as you told Susan... off to find myself another thread.

Nanette Ward, aka plumptuous

(feel free to google me to your heart's content, anyone) :bolt:

PS: Thank you to Chloe for your kind comment, I appreciated reading it.:puke: Thanks go out to l.a. susan, too. :clap2:

Thought it might be fun to make a list of things that render an active, fun-loving thread... well, Dead.

I was reading the other day and I saw for the ka-zillionth time or so where some well meaning newbie jumped into a lively discussion to ask the question. You know the one... "What is a PB?"

Don't get me wrong, I am sure I did it too. Well maybe, I sure hope not.

What can someone post that will make you shut it down and walk away?

[*susan* 1,709]

Okay, here goes....just shoot me if I screw this up.

The docs are OB/GYN guys (see the sign?). One has Sharon Stone's "essence" on his fingers (one presumes from an OB exam), and the other has Demi Moore's. Does this help?

Ohhh, now I get it! :pound::doh:

But, now that I get it, I kind of wish I still didn't, lol.

[DonnaB 3]

Wow - serious panty twist going on - and I'm not talking about the cartoon.

[*susan* 1,709]

My panties aren't twisted. Is this thread dead?

[Carlene 12]

My panties aren't twisted. Is this thread dead?

Not quite....maybe this will do it.

[*susan* 1,709]

:yuck: :)

[LB lady 0]

I think it's sometimes difficult to get one's point of view across in this medium. Sometimes people "read" the meaning as different than it was intended. Once I see people attacking each other, I tend to not follow the thread anymore. What I would like to see is people asking for clarification before assuming and going on the defensive.

Good Job Elisabeth!! I agree 100%. Where's the patience:rolleyes: .

[LB lady 0]

I think it's sometimes difficult to get one's point of view across in this medium. Sometimes people "read" the meaning as different than it was intended. Once I see people attacking each other, I tend to not follow the thread anymore. What I would like to see is people asking for clarification before assuming and going on the defensive.

Good Job Elisabeth!! :clap2: I agree 100%. Where's the patience:rolleyes:? Newby??? nice!!!

[paladin 0]

Ever get that sick feeling?

[carol134 0]

Good one Paladin! LOL