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Anyone Ever Lost Friends After Knowing You Were Getting The Surgery?



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Any of your friends ever got mad, or just plain didn't like the idea you either lost weight or intending on getting the surgery mainly for the reason that you would be smaller in size?

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Funny you bring this up, I wrote a post on hear this last week about a coworker that has become a pretty good freind at work. She is not in management, she can not fire me but I answer to her. She is in an authority position. Long story short, I mentioned to her that I was looking into be sleeved. She is quite large also. She had become crazy about the subject. She is the only person that I spilled my guts to besides my husband.

Now months later I am being sleeved. I decided to take her out to lunch and tell her this is what I am doing because I do not want to be in the position to lie to her because I do not want plan on sharing with anyone else. I have made plans with her for lunch but now am chickening out b/c I am afraid of her reaction. When I shared before she seemed jealous or bitter about it, I really did not understand it. I do not want to lose her friendship but I think I am starting to realize that I really probably did not have it in the first place, that is if how she reacted earlier is any indication. We will see. Why do you ask, what is your situation?

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No, I have heard about how I'm not big enough for the surgery. All I have to do is diet. That was frustrating. If I could do that, I wouldn't have all the weight I had. I just try to remind myself that if my friends have a problem with my weight loss, then that's their issue, not mine. ;)

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My DH actually told me that if I'd just eat less I wouldn't need this expensive surgery. So, I got him a quote from a funeral home for a full funeral. My medical expenses last year, just in co-pays and out of pocket for docs, were as much as the surgery. Now that I'm down 81 pounds, he's my biggest cheerleader. He's still a jerk and I'm still not living with him, but he's bragging about my weight loss to anyone that will listen, and some that won't, I'm sure! LOL

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My friends have overall had mixed opinions about my decision....I believe I will lose some, but you have to realize those who you lose were'nt truly your friends to begin with....

I've only shared the fact that I am having the procedure done with a few....all of my family know, they are VERY supportive....I've told only maybe 5 friends and 3 co-workers....

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my skinny friend told me she doesnt like to be the fat friend so Ive never told her. How lame is that?!

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my skinny friend told me she doesnt like to be the fat friend so Ive never told her. How lame is that?!

Thats funny, I wouldn't tell her either.

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A friend of mine got pretty upset and at times has made comments about how it is easy, which it is not. And I do remind this person that major surgery and the risks involved and the crappy feelings after ward are not easy. The initial reaction from this person was similar to my reaction...shock and not a positive feeling. That was how I first reacted to the suggestion of this.

I think it is a common thing for people to think negatively. I am very controlled in who I talk to about this. It is my business first off, and no one elses. The most important people in my life are the ones who know.

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my skinny friend told me she doesnt like to be the fat friend so Ive never told her. How lame is that?!

That doesn't sound like a nice friend and I would tell someone like that either.

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I don't really have that many really close friends. I have a lot of friends and people I hang out with, just not many I truly confide in. I haven't had much problem with my friends, except one of them told her mom (who I don't really care for) about the surgery, and she said I was taking the easy way out.

The only thing I've experienced from my friend was when I told her my goal weight of 150-155, she said that'd be too small. When I told her that it was at the highest end of normal for someone my height, she still held on to the idea that I'd be "sickly skinny." To be honest, I think it's because she would weigh more than me if I got down to that weight and she's 4-5 inches shorter than me. Until I started losing weight, a guy friend we have never paid much attention to me because he was too busy fawning over her. Now that I've lost 50 pounds total, he's noticed me more and even started flirting, which is something I have no experience with. She likes the attention and being the "hot friend" between us two.

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I had a friend who said she was so excited for me and talked a really good game, promised to be there for me after surgery, blah blah blah. Since I've had surgery she hasn't once asked me how I'm doing, hasn't asked about my weight loss, hasn't commented on my pictures, nothing, not even to see if I made it out of surgery ok. Has only called me one time and that wasn't to ask about my surgery it was to see if her husband could come over to hang out with my husband while she went to class.

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I have a close friend who was very, very scared of the whole thing. She's angry that I frightened her ... but she's coming around.

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the only person i have told are my parents, my bff and a friend of mines who we initially talked about doing surgery, he recently got sleeved, him being a month ahead of me, i am pending on my last appointment for everything could be in place with the insurance. My bff has diabetes, the same age as me and has a child.. along with diabetes she gets high blood pressure and excessive Migraines n other medical stuff, but more problematic is the diabetes... i told her about me doing the surgery.. but i feel that ever since then we have not been the same as we were.. She does not judge me, but at the same time she feels like "oh you were doing it, you lost 50 pounds before", well that was my first time losing so much weight, n guess what i gained it back, n its been hard to lose it the second, third, fouth, fifth omg many of times!!!.. n you guys have head of this " getting surgery is like the easy way out, like quieting!".. so far we have small talk here n there, she was around 270 with the baby 285 after n got diagnosed n lost a whole bunch of weight, she is currently around 170.. idk how she lost all that weight, in so little time.. but she asumes that i can do the same thing too.. but her weight loss is not so healthy because she is getting worst, always in the hospital... i am young she is young, but i dont want to end up like her so there is no questioning the sleeve!!!.. i dont want to be pregnant with 260 on me!.. so yes friends do change!!

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