I STILL SEE MYSELF AS FAT

[sickofrollercoaster 7]

I really thought after losing 60 pounds and fitting into a size 4, I would finally see myself as thin and healthy but it just is not happening. I see myself in recent pictures and I STILL see a fat person. My Mom warned me about this (she had WLS 20 years ago) but I thought how could you have issues with that after losing most or all of the excess weight... Boy was I wrong. I guess I need to get some help with that. I still have 10-15 pounds to lose and want to get it off before my 1 year surgiversary. Of course I am telling myself that once I lose the rest, THEN I will feel thin and see myself as thin but something tells me that I will still feel the same.

Kinda depressing... I went out with the girls Friday night and looking at the pictures, everyone else looks so great in their jeans and I just feel BLAH...

Anyone else struggle with this? I know, it is not just about the way you look and THANK GOD I am healthier and certainly happier with my new body. I get called Skinny and Tiny all the time now but I just don't feel that way on the inside...

[thinoneday 445]

I've lost 150lbs and still feel like sasquatch! I'm very big boned and 6'0 tall. . . shoulda been a guy I guess but no i'm not. . . ugh I feel ugly every day i look into the mirror. . . I get compliments and all, but that goes in one ear and out the other. . . i know i don't look anything like i did at 350 lbs, and I've gone from a snug 4XL to L and from 32W to 16W but still I look like a flippin' giant against everyone else!! . . . oh well no one said life was fair right?? At least I don't weigh 350 lbs anymore right?

[Nikkeystar 12]

I think it takes our minds longer to catch up with what is happening to our bodies, we lose so much weight so fast. I've lost almost 100 pounds and I see myself the same way I was before the weight loss.

[susieq 49]

I get so excited about my weight loss, getting compliments from co-workers and family and friends. Then I go shopping and try on clothes and look in the mirror and my spirits plummet. I'm still fat. I FEEL the difference. I have so much more energy and can do things I couldn't do 70 pounds ago. But am still the fat girl in the room most of the time. Sigh.

However, you are a size 4?! That is absolutely fantastic and enviable. I hope, given a little time, that you feel as good as I know you must look.

[mina 27]

I really thought after losing 60 pounds and fitting into a size 4, I would finally see myself as thin and healthy but it just is not happening. I see myself in recent pictures and I STILL see a fat person. My Mom warned me about this (she had WLS 20 years ago) but I thought how could you have issues with that after losing most or all of the excess weight... Boy was I wrong. I guess I need to get some help with that. I still have 10-15 pounds to lose and want to get it off before my 1 year surgiversary. Of course I am telling myself that once I lose the rest, THEN I will feel thin and see myself as thin but something tells me that I will still feel the same.

Kinda depressing... I went out with the girls Friday night and looking at the pictures, everyone else looks so great in their jeans and I just feel BLAH...

Anyone else struggle with this? I know, it is not just about the way you look and THANK GOD I am healthier and certainly happier with my new body. I get called Skinny and Tiny all the time now but I just don't feel that way on the inside...

it does take our mind longer to adjust to your new weight (when i had lost 70 pounds before, i would pass a store mirror and it would take me a second to realize that smaller person was me). sometimes in our mind we think by losing the weight we will have the tight body of a skinny 18 years and we get disappointed. if you are fitting into a size 4 and still see yourself as being fat it would be wise to see a counselor.

[hugsamber 8]

I have lost 86 pounds so far...still have 60 to go. I feel the same way. I still feel big, well I still am big but my mind still thinks that I am 291. So yesterday I compared a before picture of my face to a now picture of my face. Looking at that picture was a huge shock. I guess I forgot what I used to look like! There is such a difference. Though I still feel big I need a reminder every now and again on where I came from and where I am at now.

[kbl 3]

thinoneday..... i totally understand. i am also 6 ft tall and even when i am at my goal weight which is 165.... i will still be bigger then most people. i am blessed that i work with three other women that are 5'11" to 6'1" so i do not always have to be the only tall women around. kelly

[jerri 1]

If I were in your shoes. I would start looking at pictures of gorgeous people that are big boned and tall. You have something to be proud of with that awesome height. We, as women, look at those stupid skinny models in the magazines and try to be them and if we can't, we feel inadequate. This is so wrong. Get a Lane Bryant catalog and look at how proud those women are of who they are. Heck, go be one of those models!

I've lost 150lbs and still feel like sasquatch! I'm very big boned and 6'0 tall. . . shoulda been a guy I guess but no i'm not. . . ugh I feel ugly every day i look into the mirror. . . I get compliments and all, but that goes in one ear and out the other. . . i know i don't look anything like i did at 350 lbs, and I've gone from a snug 4XL to L and from 32W to 16W but still I look like a flippin' giant against everyone else!! . . . oh well no one said life was fair right?? At least I don't weigh 350 lbs anymore right?

[buchannon 17]

Confidence (even if it's faked) can go a long way. Start thinking more of yourself and sooner or later even you will believe it!

[pcos_chick 23]

I am 5'10 and I LOVE being tall and look forward to losing weight but never want to be skinny...

I want to be strong!I think we all need to have good role models. My role model is Gabby Reece - she's 6'3 and no light weight and she's beautiful and strong!

She is fierce! http://www.joemcnally.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/gabby_1.jpg

Lots of folks don't like how they look in pictures, even those that have never had or needed WLS. Its time to start loving the skin we're in even if we are still working to be healthier.

"Enjoy your body: use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or what other people think of it; it's the greatest instrument you'll ever own."

[Used2b575lbs 29]

Me too and I know I still am but rather then give myself credit for the 317 lbs i've lost I harp on the weight that I still have to lose. We are our own worst critics!!! It's horrible for sure. I still feel like the biggest person in the room that everyone is staring at, I still feel as if I can't sit in that booth, seat, or fit in that space because i'm so big. Then I sit or move into that space and I have enough room for another one of me to fit into there.

Your head is definitely behind your body, even if I go out and order something at a restaurant I always order WAY too much and even after eating it 3 or 4 times still end up throwing it out. Some day i'll figure it all out, hopefully sooner then later.

[thinoneday 445]

If I were in your shoes. I would start looking at pictures of gorgeous people that are big boned and tall. You have something to be proud of with that awesome height. We, as women, look at those stupid skinny models in the magazines and try to be them and if we can't, we feel inadequate. This is so wrong. Get a Lane Bryant catalog and look at how proud those women are of who they are. Heck, go be one of those models!

:lol: I love that sentence "heck go be one of those models" That made my day. . . I have always been really tall (thanks dad . . native american indian at 6'8") and one day (when I was a kid) my mom noticed how depressed I was over it and she took me to the side and shared a cute story which i still laugh at. . . she said that when she lived in Paraquay and Buenos Aires she was always the tallest woman around. . . one day a short man approached her and said to her "in order to get to you one needs a ladder" . . . she just looked at him and said, "well at least up here I get the fresh air, but what you get is what i let out" . . . he just turned around and left her be. . I got and still do get a kick out of that story. . .

[MommyTawnie 3]

I started putting all my focus into one part of a my body every day.. For example today I am focusing on my legs.. I tell myself that my legs are small they are no longer what they use to be, and that I should feel happy with the progress I have made.. I am not doing this to be skinny I am doing it for my health. I love myself no matter how I think I look. I've done this everyday and I don't know if it's actually working or if I just haven't seen enough pictures of myself post-op to really sit and judge myself on how I think I look. Focus on positive changes. Pull out old pictures if you have to and compare the faces in each picture. Compare the body you have now to what your body use to look like.. You have to know that everyone looks at themselves and most of the time hates/dislikes what they see. I've seen pictures of my sister before "really thin well in shape" and have seen a beautiful skinny person. She looks and sees someone that's fat. We do it to ourselves when looking at pictures. I am sure you are not what you use to be. Heck I've lost 63 lbs and I think I look amazing compared to what I did in December. Best of Luck to you and remember focus on yourself not pictures..

[sickofrollercoaster 7]

Thanks for everyone's feedback, this is really great! I knew I was not the only one feeling this way. I think part of my issue too is that I am NOT tracking my intake anymore and have pretty much stopped planning meals. I still need to do that, I felt better about myself and progress when I was having a direct hand in that. It is not that I am eating bad, sometimes just not eating at all and pre-surgery my body was the same, if I do not fuel it I will not lose any weight.

Resetting my attitude and my approach back to what it was when I first started this journey, I hope that will help me.

Thanks everyone and Chin Up!

[coops 1,790]

This is reassuring for me at the moment... I too feel very similar to many of the posts on here.

one day I will bask in my success and the next I will be sooooo cruel to myself. This is emphasised with the fact that I haven't seen the scale move for two plus weeks...

Also, my body shape has changed... a lot different to what it was before I gained a lot of weight! This is good and bad; as my legs are smaller now than they have been all my adult life, but my tummy is still really big and very wobbly! Grrrrr!

I too get a lot of nice compliments, somedays these are easy to accept, the other days I feel like they are taking the pee...

I seem to focus on the weight left to goal as opposed the weight that I have lost!!

I am hoping my brain will catch up soon... then perhaps I will have kinder days more often!